Thank you so much for all of the support last chapter! Things are starting to pick up!
Isaiah Flamez - Theo called the Bellas asking if they knew where Beca was, and upon getting the phone call Beca was worried that she would have to leave the NYC apartment for fear of him finding her and the kids. Thanks so much for the support!
Bechloeforever14 - Thanks so much for your kind words! The restraining order is for sure coming, and yes: Beca is just absolutely exhausted and for sure needs therapy. Poor woman has been experiencing such a rollercoaster of emotions for the last few weeks :( Thanks so much for reading and for your support!
RJRMovieFan - Thanks so much for your kind words! I'm glad you liked the little bit with the kids - they will certainly have important roles going forward. And thank you so much, it means so much to me that you thought the tension was well-written! I've always struggled with making those types of scenes realistic, so I'm glad it came off effectively. Thanks so much for reading and for your support!
Joanshea - I'm glad you are enjoying the fic! Thank you so much for your kind words and for your support!
CJ3 - I'm so glad you enjoyed the chapter! The kids are definitely going to play a big role with Beca and Chloe hehe. Theo will find Beca soon :( but the faster he finds her the faster he can leave forever. Yes, the Bellas are coming back one by one! Some will be back sooner than others, and some will play bigger roles than others, but they'll make appearances! Thank you so much for reading and for your support!
Wolvezzz - Oh nooooo I'm sorry for the tears but I'm glad there was a little bit of smiling! Progress is slow, but it'll be worth it in the end! There's a little more in this chapter, too :) And yes! Callie and Chloe will have a very special relationship in the end, I love writing the two of them together. Thank you so much for reading and for your support!
Icedragone - Baby steps for sure! Even a few more in this chapter! You make some interesting points in your comment about Beca's reaction... hmmm... hehe no comment. And thank you so much for your kind words! Honestly, the normal schedule is both for all of you and to hold me accountable so if you catch me slipping up don't be afraid to call me out lol. Thank you so much for reading and for your support!
Jody1990 - Hahaha exactly: the "not so calm calm before the storm" and the storm will for sure be huge. Ahhh I'm writing one of the later chapters right now and idek how to describe it. I appreciate you sharing your personal experience and I'm glad that you thought there was some authenticity in her reactions. Again, I am so glad that you are safe now, and I hope you are doing well. Thank you so much for reading and for your support :)
NJCE - ugh that is so frustrating I am so sorry! Thank you so much for sharing your Ch.8 thoughts as well! I will obviously respond to both: Callie is definitely starting to get more comfortable with Chloe, and we saw some more of that in Ch.9 and 10! Beca's conflict with what to tell her kids is probably one of the areas that I have the most difficulty writing. I hope when she eventually tells them what's going on, it is written properly. The turtle is a creep and has definitely kept tabs on all of the girls - and his response to Chloe is just another aspect of his abusive behavior. Exactly: the sooner he is back the sooner he can go away. I definitely think that he did his research prior to calling the Bellas, and I think he knew that while Chloe might stir up a fuss if she knew Beca was missing, she would be more hurt to do anything that could harm Beca's career that he's oh-so worried about. Aubrey, on the other hand, is just angry at Beca as far as he's concerned, and would probably more likely to see right through his facade if that makes sense? At this point, he doesn't know that Beca's with them and he's grasping at straws, but it won't last for long. I hope Beca doesn't run off either, the Bellas are coming, and so is Karla!/ The Bellas are coming back! First in text, and then in person one by one (maybe someone will come back in Ch.10? Who knows. Not me.). Emily really didn't want to upset Chloe, and yes, at that point, he hadn't called the other girls. Beca will learn that in due time. He definitely crossed a line, but I promise he will not get the happy ending that everyone else in the story will. You're right to say that they shouldn't underestimate him and a plan is coming - Ch.10 is literally the morning after, so the next few chapters are literally going to cover just the weekend, so a lot of stuff happens and it's all going to get very hectic very fast. Chloe definitely has a knack for making people feel comfortable around her, which I think is one of her biggest struggles with Beca not feeling comfortable around her, especially with how close they were in the past. But there will be plenty of opportunities for Callie and Chloe to get closer in the future. Beca and Chloe are coming :) Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts, as always, and for your support!
Guest (Mar.14) - Yes, of course! It was a little shorter than my average chapter, but mostly because I had covered everything I wanted to cover. I'm glad you think the chapters are long in a good way because I always wonder if people hate the longer chapters but I just tend to keep going until there is a natural stopping point. But last chapter was a filler for sure. Haha Stacie, Aubrey, and Chloe know what is going on through Beca's head, and there's no way they are leaving her alone anytime soon - both from protection from Theo and herself. Chloe and Callie will get closer, and I am so glad you liked the Callie reading/Beca sleeping part. Thank you so much for reading and for your support!
Chapter 10
Content Warning: Implied domestic violence situation, panic attack
Spending an afternoon with Chloe and her kids isn't something that Beca ever thought would happen.
She used to think about it a lot when Callie was a baby and Beca was taking care of her at home, by herself, which was arguably one of the highest and lowest points of Beca's life.
As Callie grew older and as the time Beca spent away from Chloe grew longer, the hopes and dreams Beca had of Chloe meeting Callie dwindled. Of course, there were moments throughout the first couple years of her childhood where Beca would have to stop herself from thinking about what Chloe would think of this or that, or what it would be like to have Chloe living these moments with her.
It subsided after a little while, but Chloe was always there in the back of her mind, and the frequency of similar thoughts only increased when she was pregnant with Henry and then when she had him.
Her mind was occupied with other thoughts at that time, too, but she tries not to think about that too much.
But this afternoon and into the evening, despite the ten years of separation and the anxiety surrounding that whole…situation, wasn't as horrible as Beca had been expecting.
Not that she has ever thought that spending time with Chloe has been horrible. It's just, being here, with her, is a constant reminder of everything Beca has put her through. Every ounce of pain that Beca has ever inflicted on her, resurfacing.
She hates herself for putting Chloe back in this situation, because she knows it can't be easy for her. Chloe's just too nice of a person to say so. But once things calm down, Beca is sure that Chloe will distance herself.
And Beca wouldn't blame her. At all.
Luckily, the few hours they've been spending together have been focused solely on the kids. They finished watching the movie that Callie had on after Beca's impromptu nap, and Henry then started running around to get some energy out. Around five, Beca started making dinner – Kraft mac & cheese for all four of them – while Chloe read another chapter of Callie's book to her and Henry.
Their dinner chatter was filled with Callie's excitement and Henry's mindless babblings, and yes, it was nice to share all of that with Chloe, but Beca found herself not being able to relax. She'd been on-edge since that morning, and at every sound, every bang of another apartment door closing, she flinched in anticipation. Luckily, neither of the kids had noticed – even if they had, it's not like it's exactly out of the ordinary for her to be acting like that – but Chloe did.
Chloe picked up on it immediately, and Beca found herself averting her gaze away from Chloe's every time it happened, because she knew a pair of cerulean orbs would be staring back at her, concerned just like she always is.
So Beca tried to ignore Chloe's sympathetic looks; she tried to calm her constantly-racing heart and her panicked mind; she tried to remain upbeat and cheerful for her kids who were otherwise occupied with their guest. By the time she's tucking in Henry and Callie, all Beca wants to do is curl up next to them without another thought.
Instead, knowing that she's going to have to go back out into the kitchen at some point, Beca just playfully pats the covers down around Callie and Henry, the two kids giggling as she does so. "Alright, you two. Ready for sleep?"
"Can we have one more chapter, Mama?" Callie peaks up from out of the comforter. "Please?"
Beca runs a hand tenderly over Callie's hair. "Not tonight, bug. It's been a long day, and Henry is already falling asleep."
Henry gives her a sheepish smile, his nose tucked into his alligator. "No sleep, Mama."
"Yeah, you're super convincing, little man." Beca bops Henry on the nose, tucking the covers in a little tighter. "I'll be in to go to bed soon, but you both should be sleeping when I come in, yes?"
She gets two small head nods, causing Beca to give them a small – tired – smile, and leaning forward to kiss them both on the forehead. "I love you both with all my heart."
Callie turns over on her side. "Love you, Mama."
"Love you, Mama!"
Beca chuckles at each one of her kids' responses, leaning over to turn off the bedside table light. "Love you both. Sweet dreams, my babies."
With one last shift of the blankets to ensure that they won't come uncovered, Beca slowly leaves the bedroom, leaving the door open only a sliver behind her. She walks back down the hallway while a yawn escapes her mouth, exhaustion weighing her body down as she rejoins Chloe in the kitchen. The redhead is wiping the table off, all of the dishes from dinner having been put away while Beca was giving the kids a bath.
"You didn't have to do that."
Chloe turns around with her same Chloe-Smile. "It's the least I could do considering you made dinner and you're going to be stuck with two kids in your bed tonight."
The corner of Beca's mouth tugs upward, moving to the couch to place her one spare pair of yoga pants and a comfier shirt on the cushions for Chloe, and to fold the blanket that Callie and Chloe had been using this afternoon. "Callie's fine. It's Henry that kicks."
A light laugh flits past Chloe's lips. "I know I've said this before, but they really are great kids."
"Thank you. They're pretty special." She tosses the blanket on the back of the couch, not quiet meeting Chloe's eyes. "And um, you know, if you don't want to stay…"
"I'm not going anywhere, Bec. You're not alone in this." Chloe's answer comes without any hesitation. "I'm going to be here for as long as you need."
Beca stays quiet, simply moving back into the kitchen to get a glass of water. She can feel Chloe's eyes on her as she does so, and knows that she's leaning up against the counter, a few feet away from her, before she even turns back around.
"Are you doing okay? I know today was a lot." Chloe's question comes out as a quiet – yet somehow confident – whisper. As though she knows she has to ask but is afraid to all at the same time.
Beca forces herself to nod. In all actuality, she's been drowning in her thoughts since this morning. The level of anxiety is so similar to how high it used to be when she was back living in the same house as Theo, that the fear of that level increasing – and it is steadily approaching the highest it's ever been – is absolutely terrifying to her. "I'm fine."
Chloe has been watching how tense Beca has been all afternoon and night. The nap didn't seem to help, and if anything, waking up with Callie missing from beside her, pushed her further back into her mind. Chloe knows she's not okay – she spent seven years as Beca's best friend, being there when she didn't necessarily want to talk, but would to Chloe if she was patient enough. She has no idea if her old tactics will still work – she would like to think they will – but she has to try. "It's okay if you aren't."
Beca takes a sip of the water, dumping the rest of it down the drain. "I'm fine, Chloe."
Apparently not. "Okay. But you know you can always talk to me if you want to." Please.
The words elude Beca. The words that would tell Chloe that – yes, yes, she knows. Yes, she wants to talk to her. Instead, the feeling that she can't, that she can't even look at Chloe without feeling guilty, overpowers her. So, instead of trying to come up with something to say, Beca just nods once more.
She watches as hurt floods Chloe's face, but there's also at least some sense of understanding, because she's smiling as quickly as the expression had originally left her face.
"Good. I um…" Chloe takes a deep breath, trying to ignore the sting of Beca's last acknowledgment. "You should definitely try and get as much sleep as possible tonight."
Beca can see the out that Chloe is giving her, and she's never been more grateful. "Uh, yeah… definitely." She sighs, shifting awkwardly from foot to foot. "I brought you out some sweats, if that's okay."
"Oh, totes. Thank you."
Beca runs a hand over her head, the headache that's been around since this morning continuing to pound. "I think that there's another toothbrush in the cabinet in the bathroom. Aubrey bought some but I remembered to grab ours before we left."
Chloe doesn't even bother addressing that with anything other than an, "It's great, Bec. Don't worry about me." She hesitates, watching as Beca brings her hand to the back of her neck, rubbing it while staring back down at the ground. "It's okay if you want to go to bed. I get it. You've had a long day."
She brings her hand from her neck back to her head. She wants to say more – she wants to look Chloe in the eye for crying out loud. But she can't feel anything – can't hear anything – other than not wanting to cause Chloe anymore pain. So, she just nods again. "Yeah, okay."
"Bec, are you sure you're okay?"
Beca forces a smile onto her face. "Yeah, I'm sure. I'll um… I'll see you in the morning?"
Tears stinging at the back of her eyes, Chloe barely manages the confirmation. "Y-yeah. Wake me up if you need anything?"
This time, Beca doesn't even answer. Instead, as she passes Chloe in the kitchen, she mutters a, "Night, Chloe," on her way out – never once looking her in the eye.
Last night was weird. There really is no other way to describe it.
Quite frankly, it was like Beca wasn't even there. She responded to her kids, forcing half-smiles on her face every once in a while. But Beca also refused to look in Chloe's direction. She never quite addressed Chloe directly – they hardly spoke as it was.
Chloe tried not to let it bother her. She tried – desperately – to give Beca her space while also making sure that the brunette knew that she was there for her. Whether or not it worked is beyond Chloe. All she knows for sure, is that Beca went to bed at eight thirty, and Chloe spent the rest of the night in Callie's twin bed, scrolling through her various social medias, trying to keep her mind occupied until she fell asleep at midnight.
Of course, during that deep dive, she habitually found herself navigating to Beca's Instagram page. Chloe has always been aware of the fact that the account is solely used for professional purposes. The majority of the pictures were of her performing, followed by pictures from various red carpets or award ceremonies. Even less frequently were pictures of her and Theo – and absolutely none of the kids.
Chloe spent a lot of time on those few pictures of her and Theo, zooming in on Beca's face and looking at them with a much more critical eye than she had in the past. This time, instead of being overcome with extreme sadness, Chloe just felt anger. Pure, unadulterated anger for the man that, in every picture, has his arm possessively around Beca's waist, holding her close.
Yet, something that Chloe hadn't noticed before. Something that she either missed because of her own hurt or something that she's just now picking up on because she knows of the circumstances, is the fact that Beca really doesn't have as radiant of a smile as Chloe once thought she did. At least not in those pictures. Every one of the posts with Theo, upon closer examination, had Beca either giving a thin-lipped smile, or a – seemingly – more genuine one, that never met her eyes.
Not one single picture of Beca and Theo showed Beca with that over-the-moon, bent over with laughter smile that makes the corner of Beca's eyes crinkle, and her nose scrunch. The smile that she almost always had on when she was around the Bellas and had even more frequently when it was just her and Chloe.
Even some of the photos of Beca at concerts, or the screen grabs from talk shows or other press appearances – all of her expressions just seem so…fake. Fake and forced.
And not to just anyone. Chloe was sure that every other fan has no idea that Beca is hiding absolute misery in these photos. But Chloe isn't just any other fan. Upon closer examination – and now knowing what to look for – it was clear as day.
Which just caused Chloe to beat herself up even more because she had missed all of it. She missed all the signs. She missed the fact that there was something clearly wrong with her best friend. Sure, she couldn't exactly blame herself for not picking up on these things over Instagram posts that were likely drafted by a PR person.
But she was still going to. Because all of this time, Beca had been absolutely miserable. Miserable, and unsafe. And Chloe had been sitting there, wallowing in her own self-pity, and not even questioning whether or not Beca had been alright.
Through tears, Chloe had continued to inspect each post with detective-like skills. She spent hours questioning every time a long-sleeved shirt had appeared – was the fabric hiding markings on her skin? She spent hours looking at the profiles of the people tagged in the various photos – did they know anything was going on? Why didn't they do something about it? She spent hours just sitting on Beca's page, scrolling and re-scrolling, continuing to wonder all about what her best friend has gone through over the last ten years and how she didn't do anything to help her.
So, really, she didn't fall asleep at midnight simply due to being tired. Instead, it was a combination of exhaustion from crying and exhaustion from the stressful day that has seemed to drag on for years.
When Chloe woke up on Saturday morning to the sound of little feet running down the hallway, she was so far from feeling refreshed that she had come close to rolling over in bed and falling back asleep. But at the thought that Beca continued to get up and take care of her kids day in and day out, she pulled herself from the covers and did the same.
She stuck around the apartment until late morning, helping Beca – who looked like she spent the night staring at her ceiling, though said that she slept fine – with breakfast and getting the kids ready for the day. She tried not to look at her phone that had been buzzing with texts from both Stacie and Aubrey – she responded quickly to those – and with texts in the Bellas' chat – which she ignored. Eventually, though, she needed to go home and shower and pack a small suitcase that would hold her over for at least the weekend, and left with the promise of returning in no more than an hour and a half.
So now, as that time limit dwindles down to the last twenty minutes, Chloe is running between her bathroom and her bedroom, tugging on a belt and trying to pack some toiletries all at the same time. Through the chaos that is her scattered-thought filled brain, she picks up on the vibrating of her phone from the bedside table.
It's been vibrating since yesterday afternoon. It was odd, knowing that there was a whole separate Bellas' Chat that she was being talked about in, and then having each one of the individual Bellas text her separately 'just to check in' or 'just saying hi' as though trying to silently ask how she is doing without referencing the cause for concern. Chloe didn't answer any of the messages – and she woke up to even more this morning – as well as many missed calls.
But, out of fear that it might be Beca, Stacie, or Aubrey, she does pad over to where her phone is charging, glancing briefly at the screen to see the contact flashing up at her.
Emily Junk.
Chloe feels a soft wave of guilt wash over her, knowing that it really isn't fair to the other girls for her to be blocking them out, but right now, Beca is her number one concern. She can't be focused on trying to uphold a lie that Stacie said she would handle.
Chloe declines the call, quickly scrolling through the rest of the messages that have accumulated since she got in the shower. Most of them, as she had been suspecting, are either from the Bellas' Chat or from individual Bellas. There are a few emails waiting for her from other teachers, a vague news notification, and a text from Aubrey saying that her and Stacie are heading over to Beca's apartment in a couple of minutes with Bella.
Aubrey's text is the only one she responds to, saying that she'll be heading back over there soon and that she thinks it's a great idea to bring Bella – especially after seeing how great her and Callie got along the first time they met. She presses send, and just as the little blue bubble gains a 'Delivered' tag underneath, her phone starts ringing again.
Emily Junk.
Chloe softly sighs to herself, biting gently into her bottom lip. This will make five 'missed' calls from Emily this morning – the youngest of their group that they've all always had a soft spot for. She feels bad, she does – but Chloe doesn't have the time nor the energy to either a) answer Emily's questions or b) act like she's emotionally distraught or oblivious – whichever version of her Emily is expecting. She declines the call once more.
Locking the device and moving to put it back on the table, Chloe almost jumps when it starts vibrating in her hand for the third time in the last five minutes.
Emily Junk.
Chloe's heart picks up at the sight of Emily calling her again. At this point, she isn't even sure what to do, because, on one hand, Emily is not giving up. On the other, Chloe needs to get back to Beca, she needs to pack, and she needs to keep up the illusion that she doesn't need to do any of those things because Beca isn't here.
Chloe can't lie. She's never been able to lie. She is too emotionally committed to every situation in her life – every person – that she'd never be able to keep this a secret if she started talking to one of the other members of her family. It just wouldn't work.
(Ironically, the only secret she's ever been able to keep, the only lie she's been able to tell herself and at least one other person, was how she truly felt – feels – about Beca).
So, keeping that in mind, Chloe declines the call again, and puts the phone back on the table without another thought.
She tries to ignore the phone despite the fact that she feels like it's pulling her back toward it as she finishes getting ready. Chloe puts her toiletries on her bed next to the suitcase and starts picking out a few outfits that will carry her through the weekend and potentially for Monday in case she doesn't have the chance to come back here before work. She packs her school bag, making sure to include her laptop and her To-Be-Graded file, thinking that she might be able to get some work done to take some of the pressure to talk or entertain off of Beca. Chloe is half-way through checking the status of her pink pen that has since been abandoned to the bottom of her bag, when someone starts to knock on her door.
Chloe stills, her hands drifting back down to the bag and her head slowly turning to look in the direction of the entrance to her apartment. Without even having to think about it, both panic and confusion grips at her chest. It could be anyone, really. Stacie and Aubrey, stopping by before they went over to Beca's. Mrs. Morrison from next door, either asking Chloe to use her spare key to let her into her apartment because she forgot hers or offering Chloe a freshly baked tray of popovers. Tammy Belle and her youngest son, bringing over a piece of Chloe's mail that got mixed in with hers.
But a small part of her brain also thinks that it could also be Theo. How he would be able to find her apartment, she has no idea, but he figured out where she worked easy enough. Who knows what else he's capable of.
The knocking comes again, and this time, Chloe just shakes her head, trying to dismiss her ever-growing fear, while walking toward the sound. It's definitely just Mrs. Morrison.
Yet, when she looks through the peephole, expecting to see a gray-haired older woman with baked goods in her hand, Chloe's breath leaves her body. Instead, she's staring at a tall, young, brunette, suitcase beside her and phone in hand, looking worriedly up and down the hallway.
Chloe's jaw drops open as she moves to unlock the door, not knowing what else there is to do. "Emily?"
Emily gives her a sheepish smile seeming to grip the handle of her suitcase a little tighter, while using her free hand to give a quick wave. "Hey, Chlo."
"What are you…" Chloe's too stunned to articulate what she truly wants to say. She thought that she was just ignoring phone calls – not the girl's actual presence. "What are you doing here?"
"Ha! Yeah, okay, so…" Emily grimaces, shifting from one foot to the other before brushing a stray piece of hair that has fallen from the bun on top of her head, out of her face. "You're going to think I'm crazy."
Chloe shakes her head, gripping the door handle with all of her might.
Emily blows out a puff of hair as though trying to convince herself to voice her reasoning, looking around her once more, before meeting Chloe's gaze. "Can I come in?"
"Oh!" Chloe could smack herself for how awkward she's being. This isn't a stranger – this is Emily. Legacy. Even if she doesn't know what the heck she's doing here, Emily is still here. Outside of her apartment and Chloe is standing there like an idiot. "Sorry! Yeah, of course!"
Emily wheels her suitcase in behind her, and by the time the door is closed, and Chloe is refacing her, Emily is once again saying, "You're going to think I'm crazy."
"You're not crazy, Em, I guess I'm just a little… confused."
In the almost fifteen years Chloe has known Emily, Emily has grown into herself. The once bubbly, awkward, and somewhat starstruck girl that she had met on Hood Night of Chloe's final senior year, has turned into a still-bubbly, still-awkward, but more confident and amazing woman all around. After graduating from Barden, she went on to get her psychologist license in adolescent psych and has been practicing for a couple of years now. She seems to really enjoy her job, from everything that Chloe has heard, and is doing well for herself. Her and Emily talk often, mostly over text, but with the occasional FaceTime (as well as the monthly Bellas' FaceTime Wine Night) mixed in. But she's never just shown up at Chloe's door before.
Then again, it's not like Chloe has ever declined consistent calls from Emily in order to keep a secret from her, either.
"No – no, I know, and I really shouldn't have shown up like this out of the blue. Gosh, I mean, every day I talk to people about establishing boundaries and encouraging other people to follow them and here I am just showing up on your doorstep when you clearly don't want to talk…"
Did Chloe mention that Emily still has a tendency to ramble a bit?
"And here I am using the word 'crazy' which I swore was a word I would never use to describe myself or someone else—"
"Em, take a deep breath. You're all good. I just need you to tell me why you've flown all the way from Georgia to New York." At the thought, Chloe's stress level rises. If Emily's here, unannounced, that can't be good. Plus, Beca is here – which Emily does not know – and there is just a whole host of problems associated with that.
Emily slides her jacket off of her shoulders and lays it on her suitcase. She's stayed at Chloe's apartment a few times, but she still appraises the living area so as to avoid looking into Chloe's eyes. She really doesn't know why she's here. Coming up with an explanation now, seems a whole lot harder than it was when she convinced herself that taking the five a.m. flight from Atlanta was a great idea. Because, in reality, all she can do is base it on a hunch. A hunch, a feeling, and maybe a little bit of evidence that would never hold up in court.
But it all comes down to a feeling. A feeling that she couldn't shake ever since she got a text from Stacie yesterday afternoon saying that her and Aubrey would tell Chloe about the call that Emily and a few of the other Bellas received from Theo later on in the day, and then no one could get a hold of Chloe.
The phone call from Theo was unexpected to say the least. Emily has spoken to him maybe once in her life, and it was when Beca told them that DJ Khaled signed her onto the label, and she would be moving to LA. He was…fine. One meeting hardly qualifies Emily to make a definitive decision on his character.
Though she didn't really appreciate how, after Beca moved out there and eventually married the man, that she never got to see one of her closest friends and biggest role models again.
Regardless, Emily hadn't been expecting the phone call – why would she – and she certainly wasn't expecting a certain level of nonchalance to come from two of the other Bellas in particular.
Sure, Cynthia Rose and later Amy when it was morning in Australia, shared her concern. But even though they were talking over text, Aubrey and Stacie didn't seem to think it was that big of a deal. Then, later in the night when nobody had heard from Chloe – which definitely would have happened if she knew that Beca was supposedly missing – Emily started to get a little suspicious.
She doesn't know what happened to Beca. All she knows is that one month they were texting back and forth on a daily basis and the next she had changed her number without any warning. And, yeah, that stung. A lot. Emily misses Beca – of course she does – so it only makes sense that she would be concerned that her husband supposedly can't find her.
She's equally concerned that the one person who Emily could imagine Beca going to seek comfort from, even after all these years, has been unreachable and incredibly quiet at the sudden contact. It just… it didn't add up.
Hence, the visit. Hence the three hundred dollar flight. Hence the multiple phone calls from Emily to Chloe this morning, in an attempt to warn her of her arrival.
It's not like she thought Chloe would be mad. It's more so that she wasn't sure what state Chloe would be in when she arrived.
But standing here now, with Chloe seeming perfectly fine – albeit confused – Emily is struggling not to facepalm. Either everything is okay, and she totally overreacted, or Chloe doesn't know that Beca is missing yet.
If it's the latter, than Emily is even more stupid than she originally thought because now she's going to have to be the one to absolutely shatter her friend's heart.
So, all Emily does, is smile awkwardly at Chloe, ignoring the question all together.
Chloe, on the other hand, eyes her friend warily. She doesn't even want to entertain the idea that she might have the slightest suspicion of why Emily is here. So, all Chloe does, is play dumb. "What's going on, Em? Is everything okay?"
Emily taps her phone against the palm of her hand, the case connecting with the ring on her finger. "I actually… I wanted to ask you the same thing."
Chloe gulps. "Oh?"
"Yeah…" Emily closes her eyes and runs a hand over her face. Just rip off the band-aid. "Have you talked to Stacie or Aubrey recently?"
A jolt of fear passes through Chloe. Well, shoot. "Um, yeah, I guess. About what?"
Emily takes a deep breath. There's no going back now. This was a bad, bad idea. Very bad. Her voice is quiet when she asks. "About Beca?"
Chloe's gaze immediately shifts down to the ground in front of her, her teeth digging into the inside of her cheek. She can't tell her. She can't. Chloe moves over to the stools that line the counter, sitting down in one of them.
"Oh my gosh, oh my gosh – I'm so sorry! I'm sorry, Chloe I really shouldn't have come here I—"
At Emily's sudden spiraling, Chloe finally forces herself to look up at her. "Em, stop."
"No, no, I'm sorry, Chloe I shouldn't have brought it up. I should've just let Aubrey and Stacie handle it like they said they would and ugh I shouldn't have just come here and asked you that and—"
"Em, I know about Beca."
The admission causes Emily to freeze, her eyes stilling after frantically gauging Chloe's movements. The movements that are so not panicking and so not worried like Emily had originally thought they would be. "You do? But—"
Chloe's lip starts to tremble, and before she can even figure out what's happening, her eyes fill with tears.
She's never been ashamed of crying. Ever. Emotions are human; allowing yourself to feel your emotions is healthy. But, goodness, she's cried a lot over the last week and a half.
It makes since. Her best friend did show up out of the blue after being in an abusive relationship for the last ten years. So, yeah, she has every reason to cry – to be upset. But she really wishes she wasn't crying right now.
Because now, there's no hiding from Emily. There's no hiding from those wide doe-eyes and keeping any semblance of secrecy from her.
This is why she can't lie. Everything about her gives it away before she can stop herself.
"Wait, Chlo, what's wrong? What happened? Did you talk to Theo? Did he find her? Is she okay?"
Chloe pinches her eyes closed, covering her face with her hands, and slowly shaking her head and internally apologizing to Beca for caving so easily.
"She's not okay? Chloe what happened? What's going on?" She feels Emily's arms around her, and she lays her head on her shoulder. Emily's hands draw circles on her back and for a second it's soothing, but then the reminder that she quite literally couldn't keep Beca's secret for more than ten minutes in the presence of another Bella, comes crashing back down on top of her. "Chloe, you're kind of scaring me right now."
Chloe lets out a shuddering breath, trying desperately to calm herself down because this is not about her.
Emily gives Chloe a few more moments to collect herself, before pulling away. When Chloe finally looks back up at her, there are tears streaming down Emily's face, too. Emily hesitantly asks, "where is Beca, Chlo?"
Chloe swallows thickly, her head pounding. "She's here. In New York."
To Emily's credit, she doesn't react as strongly as Chloe thought she was going to. Instead, she simply blinks, staring back at Chloe. "She's…here?"
Instead of verbally answering – because who knows what else she'll spill – Chloe nods.
"But…how? Why?"
Despite herself, Chloe lets out a harsh laugh. "It's been a long week and a half, Em."
Emily's eyes widen. "She's been here for a week and a half? What happened?"
No. No, she is not going to completely betray Beca. Not when she's just come back into her life. "It's not good, Em."
Emily pales, her hands dropping down to her side. "What do you mean?"
Chloe blinks away a few more tears, shaking her head. "I, uh… I don't want to be the one to tell you – I mean, I want Beca to be able to tell you – but it hasn't been great. She's been talking with Aubrey for like the past month and her, and Callie and Henry, got here the Wednesday before last—"
"Wait, who are Callie and Henry?"
Chloe internally curses herself. She's just doing fantastic at this whole thing. "Her kids."
Emily eyes widen even more. "Kids?"
Chloe nods. "She has two kids – Callie, who is seven, and Henry, who is two."
Emily seems to mull this information over in her head, and Chloe finds herself wondering if she will be able to figure out Beca's situation without Chloe having to mutter a word.
Sure enough, Emily simply asks, "And they're here… without Theo knowing?"
"Yep."
Emily takes a deep breath, continuing to think through it on her own. "Are they staying at Aubrey and Stacie's house?"
"No. They put her up in an apartment like two blocks from here."
"And did you know this was all happening?"
"Not until a few days after they got here. I ran into Beca in the grocery store. But Callie's going to Lewis, so I've been spending some time with her."
Chloe watches as Emily blinks back a few tears, her eyes growing more moist as the conversation goes on. It's not surprising that she is able to figure out at least some of the background information about Beca's arrival – Chloe knows that some of her clients have been in the same situation. But neither one of them speaks the truth out loud. "Is she…okay?"
"She's um…" Chloe's voice gets caught in her throat; her mind being flooded with thoughts about just how not 'okay' Beca is. "She's going to be."
Emily hastily wipes a tear away from her eye. "Yeah. Yeah, she is." Emily heaves a heavy sigh, shaking her head before gathering Chloe back in a hug. "I'm sorry that you guys have had to go through this… handle all this… on your own. You should've called."
Chloe's throat tightens, hanging on to the younger girl as tears start to roll down her cheeks. "I don't even know when I would've found out if I hadn't seen Beca at the store. And it's not like she was happy to see me, either. She's terrified, and stressed, and so not like Beca has ever been and it breaks my heart to think about everything that's happened because I just gave up on her."
"You did not give up on her. Whatever happened – that is not your fault, Chloe. It's not Beca's fault, either."
"I keep - I keep telling myself that, but it's so hard remembering when she's just… she's falling apart, Em."
Emily squeezes her tighter. "Then we'll be there to put her back together. Bellas for life, Chlo. We'll get our Beca back."
And while Chloe wants – desperately – to believe her, but after everything she's seen over the last couple of days, she isn't sure how much of 'their' Beca is still in there.
Beca paces the length of her bedroom, pulling breath after breath in through her nose and out through her mouth.
She didn't get any sleep last night. Maybe a half an hour at most. Her mind was far too occupied with thoughts of Theo showing up now that he knows she isn't in LA, and how, any day now, he could swoop back in and take her kids away from her.
So, she didn't sleep. Instead, she laid in between Callie and Henry, Callie curled into her side and Henry throwing his body over her torso. The weight of their bodies served as a nice pressure on her chest, keeping her heart from breaking through her ribcage.
When she woke up, Chloe was still in the apartment – which didn't exactly help matters. Beca's anxiety hadn't decreased in the nighttime hours, and they only rose with the sight of Chloe there, in her life once more.
A feeling that Beca has never associated with Chloe prior to moving back to New York.
When she left, Beca thought she would get a reprieve. Thought she might get a few hours of relief and just hanging around with her kids, getting them ready like she always does.
Yet, as soon as that apartment door closed behind Chloe, Beca was suddenly terrified of the thought of being alone. Of being alone when Theo is still out there, when he knows that she left him, and not knowing what to do about it.
She spent the morning with one eye on the clock and one eye on her kids. They watched their Saturday morning shows and chattered between themselves, the energy from their unexpected long-weekend sky high.
And Beca did what she does best. She forced a smile on her face, pretended everything was all right, while simultaneously counting down the minutes until either Chloe would return, or Stacie and Aubrey would be over with Bella.
Sure enough, the Conrad-Posens showed up a little after 12:30 with lunch from a sub shop down the street, Bella excitedly bouncing on the balls of her feet when Beca opened the door just wide enough for them to come in.
Surprisingly, Callie greeted Bella with only slightly less enthusiasm, leading her down the hallway to her and Henry's bedroom, with the two-year-old toddling behind them and not wanting to miss a thing.
The lack of children led to another brief moment of awkwardness between the adults as Stacie and Aubrey checked in with Beca about how she was doing that morning.
Beca didn't really have an answer for that.
Though her panicked state decreased slightly with Aubrey and Stacie in the apartment with her, as time continued to pass, eclipsing the time that Chloe promised she would be back, Beca grew fidgety once more. She knew she shouldn't – she knew that Chloe didn't owe her anything, and honestly, if Chloe had left the apartment and never looked back – Beca wouldn't blame her.
But Chloe promised she would be back. And Chloe Beale had never broken a promise she made to Beca.
Then again, Beca hadn't broken a promise to Chloe until she left and broke perhaps the biggest one of all. So, maybe this is all just pay back.
She tried not to worry. She really did.
But there was another part of her – a bigger part of her – that knew that Theo knows she still cares about Chloe almost as much as she cares about her kids.
If he wanted to hurt her, truly hurt her, one of the easiest ways would be to do so through Chloe.
The thought made Beca sick to her stomach, and that feeling only intensified when Stacie and Aubrey tried reassuring her and telling her that everything was fine – all while they were both calling Chloe and trying to get her to answer.
Beca never said why she was getting more and more uneasy by the second, but she knew that both Aubrey and Stacie knew.
Beca almost lost it when Aubrey finally managed to get a phone call back from the redhead, and upon answering the phone and hearing a couple of words, excused herself to talk out in the hallway.
She actually did lose it when Aubrey came back in, saying that Emily was at Chloe's apartment and was wondering if she could come over.
Which is how she finds herself in her bedroom, struggling to breath and desperately trying to wrap her mind around what she's going to do with having to face yet another Bella after an exhausting day prior, and after a morning of stressing out about her safety, her kids' safety, and Chloe's safety.
Beca isn't really sure how much time passes in between the moment that Aubrey told her about Emily, and when Beca subsequently left the couple in the living room and went into her bedroom, shutting the door firmly behind her. But she knows it must be at least a little while, because she feels like she's been fully lost in her mind for days.
She rakes her fingers through her hair, gripping at the roots, when she hears a faint call from the hall. "Beca? It's Chloe."
Beca stops her pacing, her chest heaving up and down as she stares at the door as though trying to see through the solid surface.
"Can I come in, Bec?"
Beca stays silent, all possible responses leaving her mind. Apparently, it doesn't matter, though, because Chloe opens the door anyways, stepping into the bedroom.
"Hey, you're okay." Chloe crosses the remaining distance between her and a struggling-to-breathe Beca, trying her best to remain calm. She got the run down from Aubrey and Stacie when she got to the apartment with Emily. She knows how quickly Beca has spiraled in a matter of hours, and now she has to play catch-up. "You're okay."
Tentatively, Chloe wraps her arms around the brunette, before tightening their embrace. She can feel Beca's body – stiff as a board – in her hold, but she simply stays there, in the middle of the bedroom. Beca's exhausted, Chloe knows that, and she can't even imagine what's going through her head right now.
But standing here, silently offering Beca her support. That, Chloe can do.
And she does.
Chloe doesn't say anything. She simply holds Beca against her until the brunette drops her head to her shoulder, her breathing slowly becoming more regulated as time passes. They sway together in the silence of the bedroom, the only noises that Chloe can hear being the kids chatting in the bedroom across the hall, though she knows Stacie, Aubrey, and Emily are undoubtedly talking in the living room.
She doesn't care about any of that, though. All she cares about is making sure that Beca is okay after she left her for far longer than she had promised, and after she brought Emily over.
She feels awful as it is and seeing Beca's reaction just intensifies that feeling.
They stand together until Beca's breathing evens out, and Chloe anticipates the moment that Beca pulls out of their embrace – not even caring that Beca is allowing her to comfort her, more so just wanting to make sure that she is okay.
"I'm sorry." Beca reaches her hand up to wipe her face, cursing herself silently as she takes a few steps backward from Chloe.
"You have nothing to apologize for. I'm so sorry that I was gone for that long."
Beca shakes her head, still not sure if that's what caused – at least in part – her spike in anxiety.
(But also knowing full well that it had a least a little bit of influence.)
"No, it's—"
"Bec – I'm sorry. And I'm even more sorry that I brought Emily here. I wasn't sure what else to do."
Beca gulps, eyes flicking behind Chloe to the hallway. "She's out there?"
Chloe slowly nods, resisting the urge to reach out and take Beca's hand. She knows the hug – more like the constricting straight-jacket like embrace she had her in so Beca could start regulating her breath – was probably a spur of the moment thing that was allowed due to Beca's unclear state of mind. Chloe doesn't want to push it. "She is. She's excited to see you, for what it's worth, but I can take her back to my apartment if you aren't up for it. She'll understand."
Beca doesn't respond at first. Instead, her gaze falls to where her hands are in front of her trembling slightly. She sticks them into her sweatshirt pocket. "Did you tell her?"
Chloe sighs, walking a few steps so that she can lean against Beca's dresser. "I didn't. She knows about the kids and she knows that something happened with Theo and that he, obviously, doesn't know you're here – even though I think she gathered that from when he called her yesterday. But I think she might have an idea as to what happened."
"Why?"
"Well, she asked a few questions about when you got here, where you were staying. I'm not sure how much she figured out, but she's a psychologist so she probably put some things together on her own."
Beca lifts her gaze to Chloe's, her eyebrows raised. "She's a psychologist?"
A small, yet prideful, smile stretches across Chloe's face. "Yeah. She has her license in adolescent psychology. She has her own practice and everything." Chloe doesn't tell Beca that she thinks Em would be a great resource for her to help figure out what to tell Callie and Henry – but she's been thinking about it ever since Callie's first outburst at Lewis.
Although, a similar thought must be running through Beca's mind, because she averts her eyes once more. "Wow."
"And she's so excited to see you, Bec. I promise."
Before Beca can even think about protesting, Chloe continues. "She knows enough about what happened, to know that you didn't do anything wrong. So, whatever you're thinking Emily's thinking, is probably wrong. All she's going to want to do is wrap you in a hug and meet those adorable kids of yours." A light laugh flits past Chloe's lips. "Seriously – she wouldn't stop asking me questions about them on the walk over."
Beca shoots another fleeting glance at the door.
"What do you say?"
Stepping into the hallway to make her way down to the living room, Beca takes a shuddering breath. She wants nothing more than to grab onto something. Usually, she has her kids' hands in hers, or maybe she can have a vice grip on a coffee mug or a bag to hide her discomfort. But walking down to meet Emily, her hands are empty. Empty, shaking, and Beca's head is pounding.
The only things that propel Beca forward, is Chloe's presence beside her and her kids' laughter coming from their bedroom.
As much as Beca isn't ready to see Emily – the girl that she once thought she would watch grow into an adult, the Bella who was arguably filled with more sunshine than Chloe – she knows there's no avoiding it.
The walk down the hallway seems to stretch through eternity, but once Beca sees the tall brunette standing there in between Stacie and Aubrey, time seems to stop around them. Beca stops in her tracks, her heart pounding against her chest as she watches Emily break out into a blinding grin.
"Hey, Bec."
Beca gulps, bringing a hand slightly up to give her a wave. "Hi, Emily."
Through the grin, Beca watches as Emily's eyes start to swim with tears, her long fingers locked in front of her. She takes a few steps in Beca's direction, and though she won't say it out loud, she's eternally grateful that Chloe is right behind her. "Okay, so I told myself that I wasn't going to do this – but can I give you a hug?"
Beca's hesitation – something that everyone picks up on – is short lived, before she gives Emily a confirming nod. Emily seems to grin even wider, before covering the remaining distance and throwing her arms around Beca's neck, tears finally breaking free.
Originally shocked by the intensity of Emily's hug, Beca freezes in her arms. But not long after the shock has worn off, Beca finds her own arms drifting up to Emily's back, squeezing her back.
Maybe it's because she'll always remember Emily as the starstruck eighteen-year-old that Beca met at her senior year Hood Night.
Maybe it's because Emily flew up here without any obligation to help Beca (without Beca knowing), and even upon hearing some of what is going on, still wanted to come over.
But whatever it is, Beca starts to sink into Emily's hold, hugging her back and recognizing that it isn't the most uncomfortable thing in the world.
"Aunt Emily?!"
Beca jumps at the sudden exclamation, putting a quick end to her interaction with Emily. She flinches away, turning with the rest of the women in the hall to see Bella running towards them, Callie and Henry poking their heads out of their bedroom to see what is going on.
Beca tries giving them a reassuring smile as Bella collides with Emily, but she knows her pale face from the surprise of Bella's voice does little to actively comfort her kids.
"What are you doing here?"
Emily presses a kiss into the top of Bella's head, running a hand tenderly through her blonde hair. "I came up to visit for a little while. What're you doing here?"
Bella shrugs nonchalantly, taking a step back and never once looking away from Emily. "We're spending the day with Aunt Beca, and Callie, and Henry. Do you know Aunt Beca?"
Emily gives Beca a smile, noting that Beca is trying to calm herself down, with Chloe splitting her attention between Beca and her niece. "I do. Aunt Beca and I used to be in the Bellas together."
"Cool." Bella finally looks down the hallway. "What about Callie and Henry? Do you know them?"
Emily shakes her head, following her niece's gaze to the kids in question. "I haven't gotten the chance to meet them yet, but I've heard a lot about them."
Taking her cue, Beca makes a grabbing motion with her hand. "Come here, guys. Come say hi."
She knows that this is just another person to add to the list of people Beca has thrown at her kids lately, but there isn't really anything else she can do.
When Callie and Henry eventually reach their mom, hand-in-hand like they sometimes are, Beca kneels down beside them. "This is Emily. Can you say 'hi'?"
Undoubtedly gaining courage from Bella's greeting, but not having enough of her own to go in for a hug like her new friend did, Callie hesitantly waves at the woman, much like her mom had moments earlier. "Hi."
Emily grins, joining them on the ground. "Hi, Callie. It's so nice to meet you." Emily restrains herself from pulling the little girl into a hug, and instead turns her attention to Beca's son. "Hi, Henry. How are you doing, sweetheart?"
Henry gives her a bashful smile, leaning his head against Beca's shoulder in response.
"You guys look so much like your Mama, has anyone ever told you that?"
Callie grins, Emily's question shattering her remaining uncertainty. "Karla used to tell us that all the time!"
Emily, knowing that now is not the time to question who Karla is, simply widens her eyes in shared delight. "Well Karla was absolutely right! You guys are like triplets!"
Callie scrunches her nose. "But Henry's a boy."
Emily just shakes her head. "I don't think it matters. I can barely tell you three apart. Especially because your Mama's so short."
Beca scoffs as the rest of the room breaks into easy laughter. "Thanks, Emily. I appreciate it."
Emily shrugs, shooting the two kids a wink. "Hey, I can't help it if it's the truth." Emily sits back on her legs with a content sigh. "What have you three been up to back there?"
Bella leans up against the wall. "We've been playing games on my iPad."
"I hope you gave Callie and Henry a turn, Bells," Aubrey warns from her position at the counter standing next to Stacie.
Bella immediately nods. "I did! I promise!"
Aubrey holds her hands up in surrender. "Okay, okay, I was just double checking."
Bella turns her attention back to Emily, before brightening significantly and directing her question back at her moms. "Can we go to the park? We're close to Aunt Chloe's house, right?"
Stacie is about to answer in the negative, when Callie's excitement stops them all. "A park?! Mama, can we go?!"
Beca's jaw drops open as she looks to the other adults in the room for some assistance in answering. "I, um… I don't know, Cal…"
Henry perks up. "Swings?"
"Please?!" Callie hangs onto Beca's arm, eyes pleading, and Beca can't exactly blame her. Except for school, Callie and Henry have been trapped in this apartment for almost two weeks. This coming from having a backyard and pool to run around at LA, and the park down the street from Karla's house that they would frequent. "Puh-lease, Mama?"
Chloe lays a tentative hand on Beca's shoulder. "We can take the kids, Bec, if you don't—"
"No! Mama you have to come."
"Um…" Beca's chest tightens, her eyes flicking between her kids, Bella, and Chloe, Emily, Aubrey, and Stacie. They're all waiting for her answer – none of them really offering assistance – and under their gazes she can't really come up with a way to let her kids down easily. As much as every part of her is screaming no, there's a small part, calling from the back of her mind, saying that fresh air – away from the confines from the apartment at a place where she can actually give her kids some semblance of happiness – that she hears loudest of all. "Okay. Yeah. Let's go."
It might not be one of Beca's smartest ideas, but after how exhausting the last few weeks have been, after living on the edge of her seat and feeling like she has been one breath from falling off, after watching her kids cry and question her every motive, and watching herself cry every ten minutes, going outside, down the street to the green space that is relatively empty for a bright, sunny afternoon, is something that Beca knows she needs.
It didn't take long for the entire gang to get ready. Chloe took charge of Callie and Henry while Beca focused on getting dressed for a public outing – her sunglasses, obviously, and then pulling her hair back away from her face. She helped Henry go to the bathroom and then packed snacks for all three kids in her bag as Bella, her moms, and her two other aunts got their own shoes and on.
She must've been looking nervous, because not only did Chloe promise that everything was going to be okay, but Stacie and Aubrey made it a point to say that the park is small and not that popular, and Emily said that no one is going to question anyone with sunglasses on playing in the park in a sunny afternoon.
But Beca just managed a nod and turned her attention back to her kids, both of whom were giddy with excitement as they locked up the apartment and made their way to the street, Henry in his stroller and Callie gripping her Mama's belt loop. Beca did feel protected walking down the street with the four other women surrounding her, and as they got further away from the apartment, Beca's mind seemed to drift further away from her current troubles. Instead, she just got lost in the happy giggles of her kids, and the easy chatter between Bella and her moms and aunts.
That feeling only intensifies when they finally get to the park, Bella and Callie instantly running off to the playground while Beca and the other women take a seat in the grass underneath the shade of some trees. She lets Henry out of his stroller, and the toddler spends time just playing with his mom, and then getting chased around the group by Emily, who still acts just as young as she always has.
Chloe takes turns capturing Henry on his run around and tickling his stomach, to watching Bella and Callie play on the monkey bars, to watching Beca, who just seems to be taking it all in. At one point, surrounded by the sounds of her children's happiness, she simply lifts her face up to the sun and basks in its light and warmth.
Chloe's heart just about bursts at the sight.
On Henry's next time around, breathless but grinning, Beca reaches out and grabs Henry, pulling him onto her lap and peppering him with kisses as she does so. Henry squeals in delight, reaching up with his little toddler hands to try and stop her, and only manages to grasp onto Beca's sunglasses instead, pulling them off her face.
The movement stuns Beca momentarily, but as she gets lost in the interaction, she doesn't seem to mind, simply continuing to cause her son to squirm and cackle until he escapes and is up and running around again.
This time, Beca pops up, too, chasing him around as the other adults laugh and egg them on.
They're far too invested in enjoying their brief reprieve from their stresses and fears to notice that from the street, someone snaps a picture of Grammy-award winning musician Beca Mitchell, and what seems to be, her two children.
Thank you so much for reading! I hope you enjoyed it and, as always, I look forward to hearing any thoughts you would like to share.
For those of you reading Everything in Between, I am still trying to get Chapter 6 up on Sunday, but it might be a few more days because the brain just isn't working hahaha.
See you on Wednesday!
