Thank you for all of the support last chapter! Little bit of a filler chapter this time around, but I'm guessing a lot of you will be happy with one scene in particular.

Isaiah Flamez - Part I is going to end around Chapter 17, and then Part II will start with Chapter 18 and go through the epilogue - so probably around 8 chapters, making the fic be around 25 chapters in total. Thanks so much for reading and for your support!

Icedragone - Hahaha both Beca and Karla did really well! Custody is tricky tricky and all will be revealed on that front in Chapter 16. I really like Karla's character and I just had to get her in there having a conversation with Chloe :) I'll let you decide if her advice was good or not. Part 2 will be under this same title! Part I will end around Chapter 17, there will probably be like a two-week break so I can get a few chapters written as I enter finals season, and then Part II will be from Chapter 18ish to Chapter 25ish, but all under the same title - it will make more sense once you read the end of Chapter 17 ;) Thanks so much for reading and for your support!

Jody1990 - I wish you didn't have to go through anything even remotely similar to the things happening in this fic, but I really appreciate you saying that. I honestly went back and forth with having that conversation between Chloe and Karla but I'm glad that it had the desired effect haha. Now let's just see if Chloe listens to her advice ;) Thanks so much for your kind words and for your support!

Guest (Apr.14) - Thank you so much! Custody is going to be an issue with the individual custody hearing for sure. Luckily, California custody laws in regard to domestic violence cases are pretty strict compared to other states, so basically, until there is a custody hearing, there is a very slim chance that the kids would be allowed to see whoever the person with the restraining order out against them is - at least that's what I've found in my research. But the custody proceedings are explained a little more in this chapter, and then they actually happen in Chapter 16 so we will see! Thank you so much for sharing all of your thoughts on what could happen. I don't want to say too much because I don't want to give anything away but your thoughts on Callie are very very interesting. She is certainly an interesting character in the sense that she has no reason not to believe Theo. Lots and lots to think about :) Thanks so much for reading and for your support! (Ps I started planning the Life Unexpected fic)

NJCE - Hehehe Theo didn't do anything... yet. dun dun dunnnn do with that information what you will. But the innocent act is definitely a key here. I had to fit Karla's character in a bit more! Hopefully Chloe listens to her :) The Bellas reunion is definitely going to be interesting and honestly I haven't really figured out how it's going to go! Only time will tell! Thanks so much for your kind words and for your support!

CJ3 - Thank you so much! I'm glad you enjoyed the chapter and thought the court room was realistic. Chloe and Beca's relationship is tricky for sure but there might be some light there this chapter? Idk you tell me :) Thanks so much for your kind words and for your support!


Chapter 15

Content Warning: Implied depressive state, implied/referenced abusive relationship; Theo's still horrible (last section, specifically), guilt; mentions of abortion

Beca doesn't even have the words to describe how emotionally and physically drained she is when the Uber pulls into the Conrad-Posen driveway at seven o'clock at night four days later. Her body aches and the tension in her head, neck, and back makes her feel like she's a taut rubber band ready to snap. The emotional weight of the last few days weighs down on her like a ton of bricks, and her heart simply longs for her kids to be back in her arms.

The hearing had been an exhausting endeavor in and of itself. While the five year restraining order did give Beca some semblance of relief, she found herself relieving what was said during the hearing over and over again. Everything she said, everything Theo's lawyer asked her. Everything Theo said, everything Karla said. The whispered words of encouragement from Chloe and Aubrey before, during, and after the hearing.

Her mind felt so full in the hours following the judge's adjournment that she could barely speak a full sentence. She took an hour and a half long, burning hot shower when they got back to the hotel room, with Chloe being so concerned with the time that she knocked on the door to check on her around the fifty minute mark and the eighty minute mark. But Beca couldn't talk to anyone. She could barely think, let alone form a coherent sentence. Her hands didn't stop shaking until she got out of the shower, and her breathing didn't really stabilize until she was in her sweats and sitting on the couch, nursing the cup of tea that Aubrey handed to her as soon as she sat down.

And even then, she didn't talk to anyone. She sat silently, her eyes glazed over and not even remotely close to watching whatever television show that Aubrey and Chloe had playing. She didn't say a single word, and neither Chloe nor Aubrey asked her to. She sat there, as still as a statue, as the hours after the hearing passed. As Aubrey answered the inquiring phone call from Stacie and Emily behind the closed door of the bedroom. As Chloe pretended not to glance worriedly in her direction every three minutes on the dot.

She sat there. Not moving. Not talking. Simply reliving the happenings of the courtroom on a continuous loop in her mind.

Around seven o'clock that night, she finally broke from her stupor when Aubrey asked her if she wanted to talk to Callie and Henry and tell them goodnight. It took a minute for her words to register within Beca's brain, but once they did, she was up and heading into the back bedroom to call them.

Talking with them made her feel lighter than she had all day.

Beca didn't get any sleep that night, or the night after, as they waited for the mediation date to roll around. According to Aubrey, they only got one so fast because the kids were in New York and they wouldn't consider doing the meeting virtually. So, Theo was scheduled for the morning, Beca was scheduled for around lunch time, and then, the goal, was that they would come to a decision sooner rather than later instead of going through an entire custody hearing.

Of course, that didn't happen.

What did happen, was that Theo refused to consider anything but full custody. Obviously, Beca also refused to consider anything but full custody for herself. Theo dug his feet in about going to AA meetings and potentially taking parenting classes. Beca dug her feet in about visitation – supervised, because she refused to let the kids be alone with him.

Throughout the entire mediation appointment, Beca sat there, with Riley by her side for support (though she wasn't allowed to speak), fighting tooth and nail for her kids never to have the chance to be harmed by their father's hands again. And the mediator, seemingly having been expecting it, simply sent their case back to the judge.

Later that same afternoon, they had a meeting with Judge Campbell (separately, thankfully) who, after determining that mediation was clearly a lost cause, ordered a Child Custody 730 Evaluation. While she didn't really understand it while Judge Campbell was talking about it, Riley did explain it to her on their way back to the hotel.

Basically, Judge Campbell appointed some psychologist to come talk to her, Theo, Callie, and Henry, and anyone else that they feel like they need to talk to. It's some sort of independent investigation so that the psychologist can issue a recommendation on child custody after talking to all four of them and seeing Beca interact with the kids. The thought of this random stranger interrogating her kids, without her present, nonetheless, is unsettling. She still hasn't reconciled with the fact that the kids might have to be with Theo, under supervision for observation, if the kids seem comfortable with it.

But it wasn't like Beca had a choice. Instead, she signed the paper, agreed to a date two weeks from then, and went back to the hotel and updated Aubrey and Chloe. The following afternoon, they were flying back to New York.

And finally, finally, they are back on the East Coast. The sun has already set and the Uber's headlights dance across the front of the house as he pulls into the driveway. She almost breaks down into tears, both from exhaustion and from pure relief to finally being steps away from her kids.

Aubrey, Chloe, and Beca all thank the driver and climb out of the car to get their bags out of the trunk. There's a certain hum of excitement amongst the three of them, Aubrey and Chloe engaging in a quiet conversation and Beca just anxious to get her bag so that she can see the kids.

If that desire hadn't been made clear by the anxiety coursing through the brunette all the way home, the way she fights through her exhaustion and walks briskly up to the front door of the house with Aubrey and Chloe on her heels, certainly does.

Beca pushes open the door to Aubrey's house, her eyes instantly flicking down the hallway to the living room where the sound of the television is ringing through the first floor of the house. She barely has time to register the different faces turning with excited grins on their faces – Stacie on one end of the couch, Bella, Callie, and then Henry sitting on Emily's lap – before she's hearing squeals coming from her children.

"Mama!"

Beca holds back a sob, dropping to her knees and pulling Callie into her chest, and then Henry, too, once he waddles over to her hold. She clings onto both of them, feeling an immense sense of relief as she inhales the familiar scent of ivory soap and the strawberry shampoo that Callie has been using ever since she found out that it's the one that Bella uses. If Beca didn't know any better, she would be certain that they both grew three inches and aged a few years.

She presses a kiss into both of their heads, completely oblivious to the fact that Chloe and Aubrey have come in behind her, and Stacie, Emily, and Bella, are joining them in the front entry way. "I missed you guys so much."

"Mama, you were gone for so long." Callie wraps her arms tighter around Beca's neck, burying her head in her shoulder. They lasted two nights before Callie cried over FaceTime telling her that she missed her. Henry seemed sad, too, but Callie was the only one to actually shed tears.

"I know, bug, I am so sorry. I'm back now, though, and you can tell me all about what you've been doing with Bella, Stacie, and Emily, yeah?"

Callie nods into Beca's shoulder, while Beca runs her fingers through Henry's hair. "I missed you, too, buddy."

Henry looks up at her with a toothy grin. "Mama home now?"

Beca gives him another kiss on the forehead. "Mama's home now, baby. I'm not going to leave you again."

When Callie and Henry eventually allow her to stand (Callie clinging onto her upper thigh and Henry settling into his position on her hip, of course), she misses the tail-end of Aubrey and Stacie's 'hello' kiss, and Chloe moving on from hugging Bella, to hugging Emily. Bella waves animatedly at her but doesn't move from her mom's side. "Hi, Aunt Beca!"

Beca shoots her a wink. "Hi, Bella. How're you, kiddo?"

"I'm good. I'm glad you're home."

The corner of Beca's mouth tugs upward as Bella's moms and aunt watch on, fondly. "Me, too, Bella. Thank you." She looks up at Stacie and Emily. "And thank you for watching them. I appreciate it."

Stacie brushes her off, wanting nothing but to welcome the brunette home as well, but having grown used to limiting physical contact with Beca, she stays put with her arm wrapped around Aubrey's waist. "Happy to do it. We're glad you're home."

Beca lets out a soft sigh, a small weight being lifted off her shoulder. "Yeah, me too."


It doesn't take long for everyone to want to turn in for bed. Bella is really the only one that puts up a fight, and Callie wants to spend some more time with her mom. But after Beca promises that they'll be sleeping in the same bed, she agrees. Beca brings them through their bedtime routine, helping them brush their teeth and wash their faces. She braids Callie's hair and, after saying goodnight to the other adults and Bella, they retreat back to the bedroom. Beca reads them both a book, sings them a quiet song, and rocks Henry to sleep.

By eight o'clock, Henry is fast asleep on Beca's lap, and Callie is fighting sleep herself. Beca sits beside her, her fingertips brushing gently across her forehead, as she smiles down at her daughter. "You can close your eyes, bug. I'm not going anywhere. I'm tired, too."

Callie shifts underneath the covers, getting as close to Beca as possible. "I missed you, though."

"I missed you, too, Cal."

"I don't wanna go to sleep. I wanna talk to you."

Beca chuckles, and despite how much her eyelids are drooping and how much she just wants to lay her head down on the pillow with Henry on her chest and Callie tucked into her side, she indulges her. "Want do you want to talk about, love?"

Callie grins, shrugging against the mattress. "I dunno. What did you do at work?"

Beca's heart clenches in her chest. "Well… I went to a lot of meetings."

"What kind of meetings?"

"Boring ones… boring adult meetings. I would've much rather have been here with you."

Callie giggles, holding her stuffed bear to her chest. "Did you go to your office?"

Thinking back to the unopened bag of peanut butter cups that Beca got at the convenient store at the airport this morning, Beca nods. "I did. You can have a candy tomorrow."

"Yay." Callie shifts again, kicking her legs under the blanket. "Did you see Randi?"

Randi, Theo's personal assistant, used to watch the kids when Beca brought them into the studio. Beca was never sure how much Randi knew, but she was Theo's assistant for eight years. Who knows what she had picked up on. "No. Not this time."

"Did you—" Callie cuts herself off, her eyebrows furrowing slightly as she falls silent.

Beca's stomach does the same flip that she's grown accustomed to whenever Callie brings up her father. She pushes the feeling down, remembering the conversation that she had with Callie before leaving for LA, and brushes a few fly-aways out of her face. "Go ahead, bug. What were you going to ask?"

Callie brings one of her fingers up over the bridge of her nose. She hesitates, but with Beca's quiet reassurance, she eventually asks, "Did you see Daddy?"

Beca lets out another sigh. Whether it's because she's utterly exhausted, or if it's because there's something about the way Callie's acting that makes her seem to be in a good place to have this conversation, the words fall from her lips before she can even give it a solid thought. "I did. For a little bit."

Callie lifts her head. "You did?"

"Lay back down, Cal. We're supposed to be relaxing." Beca nods as Callie snuggles back underneath the covers. "I did."

"What did you do?"

Beca shifts Henry so his head lolls to the other side of her chest. "We went to meetings."

"Did you say hi?"

Beca gulps, her daughter's naturally inquisitive personality making her slightly nervous – not for the first time, and she knows it won't be the last, either. "Mhmm."

"Did you talk?"

"Not really."

Callie perches her chin on Beca's arm, looking up at the older woman. "Did he make you sad?"

"Um…" Beca's voice catches in her throat. She can hear Emily's words in her head. Honesty. Protect her but be honest. "He did. But I'm okay, so don't you worry about me."

Callie frowns and she casts her gaze downward. "I'm sorry he made you sad, Mama."

Beca is shaking her head before she even answers. "No. You do not apologize for Daddy, Cal. Ever. Okay?"

After a few beats, Callie nods silently. "Okay." Callie nuzzles back into Beca's side. "Night Mama. Love you."

Beca plants a kiss on top of her head, holding her as close as physically possible. "Night, baby. Love you so much."


The days pass by both quickly and slowly at the same time. It's almost dreadfully long, waiting for the day that Beca is scheduled to fly back to Los Angeles – this time with the kids, Chloe, and Emily. But, on the flip slide, she finds that the time that she's going to have to see Theo once more, is quickly approaching.

They are leaving in two days. Flying out at ten o'clock in the morning, checking into a hotel later that evening. They won't meet with the psychologist until the following afternoon and the evaluation could last anything from a couple of hours to a couple of weeks. Then there's the judge's decision.

Then there's…whatever happens next.

Her mind has been going on a loop, thinking about all of the what ifs. Some days are better than others. Some days, she can get lost in playing games with Henry and Callie, almost adjusting to this new normal that everyone has been falling into while living in Stacie and Aubrey's house.

Other days, she's found herself almost unable to get out of bed until Callie and Henry are bouncing around, asking for help to get dressed or to have their hair done. Or she'll take showers that are forty-five minutes long, turning the temperature of the water up so high that when she emerges from the steaming stall, her skin is bright red. Or she'll find herself falling into a daze, staring off into the distance, without anything distracting her enough to break her free of its hold. Everyone else just sort of…doesn't acknowledge it.

Beca guesses that that has become a part of her new normal, too. The worry. The fog that she has been finding her head in more and more.

She can only hope that it'll get better after the custody trial, assuming that all goes according to plan.

Again – assuming that everything ends up okay.

With a heavy sigh, Beca takes one of Henry's pairs of pants out of the laundry basket, folding the article of clothing and placing it into the suitcase beside the basket on the bed. She's getting really sick and tired of having to pack this stupid thing.

Then, of course, she has to remind herself that each times she packs the suitcase, they are one step closer to never having to pack it again.

Outside of the bedroom, the floorboards creak. Stacie and Aubrey are out grocery shopping, one of the only times they get some time alone these days, and the kids are downstairs playing together. Beca isn't sure what Emily and Chloe are doing, but if she has to guess, it's one of those two that is about to poke their head into the bedroom.

Sure enough, two seconds later, Chloe leans into the bedroom, her nails lightly tapping on the door. "Hey."

Beca gives her a small smile, resting her hands on the side of the laundry basket. "Hey."

Things with Chloe have been… the same? Better? Worse? Honestly Beca isn't sure.

There's been this distance between the two of them in the weeks following the hearing. Almost as though Chloe has been actively staying away from Beca. There had been glances, here and there, while they were back in Los Angeles. Moments where Chloe would hang around, as though waiting for Beca to start up the conversation. She didn't force any hugs and there weren't any gentle hands placed on her shoulder. While she did ask every once in a while if Beca was okay – perhaps the first day after the hearing, and then a couple times throughout the rest of their stay – Chloe never pushed. She never tried to get Beca to talk more than she wanted to.

It was almost like Chloe was trying to offer support while simultaneously respecting that Beca didn't really want to talk to anyone.

And Beca appreciated that. She really did. With it, came almost a greater comfortability between the two women – at least from Beca's perspective. Almost like this newfound respect; perhaps a greater distance that resulted in no pressure.

When they got back to New York, Chloe fell back into her role of being the exact amount of happiness and normalcy that the kids need. She is amazing with them – so is Emily – and Beca has found herself becoming more and more appreciative for everything that Chloe's done for them.

Of course, there have been times where Chloe has checked in with Beca as well. Beca always answers with the same nod or quiet affirmation, and Chloe hasn't attempted to pry. She hasn't pried when it was just a normal night, and she certainly didn't pry if it was after an hour of talking with Aubrey in the privacy of her office and Beca emerged with blotchy skin and puffy eyes. Instead, she just silently mulled around, a silent force at the ready should Beca request it.

Though she has yet to engage in any sort of conversation with Chloe about the hearing – what Beca said, what Chloe heard – the redhead has shown absolutely no indication of going anywhere. And even if Chloe hasn't explicitly stated that – Beca can almost feel her promise whenever she perches herself at the other end of the couch with a book while Beca is watching a show with Callie, or when she simply sits at the counter grading papers and creating lesson plans while Beca cooks for the house.

No words, no conversation. Just Beca catching Chloe smiling gently at her every once in a while, and Chloe just…being there.

There's distance. But it's good distance.

Chloe wakes gently into the guest bedroom – the one that once had been designated for her – taking in the suitcase, the laundry basket, and Callie and Henry's stuffed animals perched on the pillows of the bed. She smirks fondly – or perhaps it's with a twinge of sadness. "Packing already?"

Beca nods, looking down at the less than half-packed container. She's barely put any clothes in there for herself, just trying to get everything that the kids may need for a five-day visit (and hoping that she won't need more than she's allocated for the trip). "Yeah… if I don't, Henry will end up dirtying all of the clothes that he might need."

A light laugh escapes from Chloe's mouth as she steps further into the bedroom. "Speaking of, I think someone might have given him a chocolate cookie that he may have gotten all over his shirt."

Beca rolls her eyes, biting back her mirth, knowingly. "Would that someone happen to be you?"

"In my defense, I didn't realize they were still all melty. Emily said she had made them this morning."

Beca chuckles as Chloe takes a gentle seat on the side of the bed. "Hopefully his hands were saved… I'm guessing Aubrey won't appreciate him getting chocolate all over her couch."

Chloe waves her off. "She's fine and his hands were squeaky clean I promise."

Silence – a comfortable one, but silence nonetheless – falls over the pair. Beca's gaze drifts back down to the suitcase and Chloe stares off at the closet until she turns her attention back to the brunette. "Have you talked to them yet? About the evaluation?"

Beca gulps, shaking her head. "Not yet. I think I'm going to tomorrow when Callie gets home from school. Emily said she would help again."

"Good, good." Chloe wrings her hands together. "We haven't um… we haven't talked in a while. How are you feeling about… all of it?"

Beca huffs out a dry, almost bitter, laugh in response.

The corner of Chloe's mouth quirks up in a sad smile. "That good, huh?"

"Oh yeah. Fantastic." Beca runs a hesitant hand over her face. Surprisingly, her heart isn't racing and the pit of dread that is normally in her stomach whenever there's a possibility of some conversation surrounding Theo, isn't there. She takes it as a sign, shrugging gently, and actually answers. "I'm uh… I'm not exactly sure what to expect, to be completely honest."

Chloe nods gently but doesn't say anything. For the first time in as long as Beca can remember, there's almost a comfort – rather than anxiety – that comes from the gentleness of Chloe's gaze, her blue eyes waiting patiently for an answer.

"I've talked to Aubrey and I've done my own research, but I have absolutely no idea what kind of questions they're going to ask me. What kinds of questions they're going to ask the kids." Beca backs up so that she's leaning against the dresser that's across from the bed. "I know that they're going to be scared. And I… I don't really know what to do to help."

Chloe seems to tread carefully, her voice quieting. "Have you talked to Em about it?"

"Kind of. That's why we're talking to the kids tomorrow. To prepare them. Let them ask questions. I think she's going to ask the evaluator if she can be in the room when they are talking to the kids, too."

She's talked with Emily about this a little bit. In fact, she's talked to Emily about the kids on multiple occasions. There's something about the younger woman – the same joyfulness that she's held since Barden, perhaps the ease at which she seemed to come back into Beca's life – that makes her easier to talk about Callie and Henry, to. Emily is honest with her; she doesn't really dance around the topic of Theo and she certainly doesn't sensor her answers when Beca asks her about the kids and whether or not how they're acting is 'normal'. She might be cautious, but there's definitely an honesty about Emily that she's really only seen in Aubrey since arriving in New York.

Chloe smiles encouragingly. "That would be good. Does Aubrey think that it'll be a possibility?"

"No. She said it would be long-shot. Basically, we might have a small chance of getting it to happen if the kids, like, refuse to talk to them. But other than that, it's supposed to be one-on-one."

Chloe lets out a heavy sigh. "It's so stupid how they're putting you through this. Especially with the restraining order, now. In what world should that make him allowed to see two small children?"

The back of Beca's throat burns. She's thought the same thing countless of times, and still, she has yet to come up with an answer. But at the same time, she's also been thinking about something else. A question that, surprising both Beca and Chloe, rolls off Beca's tongue in a whisper. "Honestly, I think I'm more concerned that they'll decide that I'm less fit to see the kids than he is."

Chloe's eyes widen slightly – whether it be from Beca's disclosure or the content of her statement, she isn't sure. Yes, she's been keeping her distance. Giving Beca space, just like Karla had suggested, but, up until now, she hasn't been sure if it was actually working. She shakes out of her shock quickly, addressing Beca's doubt. "Bec – that would never happen. You—you are the most amazing mom. Those kids… Bec, they would be completely lost without you."

Beca lets out a snort, tears quickly filling her eyes. She's been thinking about this a lot lately, especially with how she's been feeling. The dark cloud hanging over her head only being chased away momentarily by the restraining order ruling, and quickly returning with the impending threat of potentially losing her kids.

The way Beca averts her eyes makes Chloe's nerves skyrocket. She's seen the brunette struggle with guilt – more often than not – since her return. But this…this is something different. It makes the hair on the back of her neck stand up; makes her heart beat a little faster. She shifts so that she's looking right at her. "Beca, what's going on?"

Beca shakes her head, closing her eyes and letting out a shaky breath. She'd be lying if she said that she hasn't been playing Theo's lawyer's questions – his accusations – on a loop since getting back. They've been simply compounding her own feelings and thoughts of inadequacy. Of her mistakes. This person – the evaluator – they are specifically trained to pick up on inadequacies. It's not like Beca will be able to hide from them.

"Hey – look at me, Beca." Chloe speaks softly, yet firmly. She waits until Beca looks at her through bleary eyes. "You have not done a single thing wrong in raising those kids. Whoever this person is, they're going to see that. I don't care what Theo, or his lawyer, or anyone else says. Neither will they."

A few tears escape from the corner of Beca's eyes. She chances it, actually meeting Chloe's gaze. She locks eyes with the redhead, her question coming out timid and almost fearful. "And if they do care?"

Chloe never once looks away. "Then we'll figure it out. He is not winning this, Bec. Not if I have anything to say about it."


"We're going back home?!"

Beca winces as Callie bounces around in front of where Beca and Emily are kneeling in front of her and Henry. She reaches out to take Callie's hand. She has everything that she wants to say – script-like, almost – in her brain. She can't let them get too off track. "Cal, kiddo, calm down for a second."

Callie frowns, but falls silent.

"We're going back to Los Angeles. We'll be staying in a hotel – but we're not going home. Does that make sense?"

"How come we're not going home?"

"Well," Beca takes a deep breath, looking over to Emily who gives her a quick nod of support. "We can't go home because Daddy is living at home right now."

Henry moves so that he's leaning against Beca's side. "Daddy?"

Beca nods, addressing Henry before she takes a look at Callie's perplexed expression. It's strange, really, how little Henry talks about Theo. The first week or so of living in the apartment, he would ask every once in a while. But since then, he really doesn't mention him or ask about him at all. Emily says that it might be because of his age, or perhaps because he never really connected with Theo – which would make sense, considering Henry really never took to Theo to begin with. As much as Beca and Callie are close, Henry has definitely always been a Mama's boy. "Yes. Daddy is living there right now, which means we can't be there."

Callie sits down in front of Beca. "How come?"

Beca says the same answer that she practiced with Emily. "Do you remember when we talked about how Daddy makes me sad sometimes?" When she gets Callie's affirming nod, Beca continues. "Well, some people are trying to make that stop happening. So, they told Daddy that we couldn't see each other anymore."

Callie's eyes widen. "Forever?"

"Not forever, but for now, bug."

The confusion is completely evident on Callie's features and it makes Beca's heart shatter into a million pieces. The words seem to slip her mind, her ability to speak failing at the sight of Callie's saddened expression.

Almost as though she can hear Beca's thoughts - or lack thereof - Emily steps in. "Does that make you a little sad, Cal?"

Callie looks from Emily to Beca, before nodding, slowly.

Emily smiles reassuringly. "That's okay. It can make you sad, right Bec?"

Beca agrees, keeping what Emily has said about Callie really not understanding what is going on, in the back of her mind. "Of course."

"Can you tell us why it makes you sad, kiddo?"

The furrow of Callie's eyebrows grows deeper and Beca swears that she can see a slight tremble in her daughter's bottom lip. They wait patiently for her to answer. Eventually, she does. "Can we see Daddy?"

Beca glances at Emily for help – knowing full well that she wants literally nothing more than for Callie to never see Theo again – but Emily has all of her focus on the little girl. "Do you want to see Daddy?"

Callie hesitantly shifts her attention over to her mom, looking for some sort of response, before shrugging to Emily's question.

Emily nods, and Beca's chest feels like it's tightening by the minute. Luckily, Emily seems to get the hint, because she pretty much takes control of the conversation while Henry plants himself firmly on Beca's lap. "That's okay if you don't know. But that's actually something that your Mama and I wanted to talk to you about."

Callie's head quirks slightly to the side. "Talk about what?"

"Well, the reason that we're going to LA, is because you, and Henry, and your Mama… you're all going to be talking to a nice person who is going to ask you questions about your dad and about your life before you moved to New York."

Callie's visible sadness seems to instantly be replaced by more confusion. "What kind of questions?"

"I'm not sure exactly, but this person will probably ask you about some of the things you used to do with Mama at home, maybe some of the things that you used to do with Daddy. They might ask about what it was like living with Mama and Daddy in Los Angeles, if you like living in New York… things like that."

Beca shifts so Henry is more evenly on her lap. She looks between the two of them. "And this person, they're going to be asking me questions too, so it won't just be you guys. They might watch us play games, maybe stay for dinner, things like that."

Callie crinkles her nose. "How come?"

Beca sighs, mulling the answer over in her head before saying, "They just want to see how our lives are; what we do, if we're happy, things like that."

Henry grins up at Beca. "I happy, Mama."

"I'm so glad, baby." She plants a kiss on his head, grateful that someone is. "Does that make sense, Cal?"

Callie's frown deepens. She takes a deep breath, but her cheeks grow flushed as she struggles to articulate her words. "I just—how come?! How come we have to?!"

Beca holds out a gentle hand, taking over before Emily has a chance to cut in. "We're just trying to figure out a way to make sure that everyone is happy, and no one is sad, and no one is making anyone sad, Cal. I know it's hard, but you and Henry are being so strong, and I know it doesn't really make a lot of sense—"

"I don't want to! I don't want to talk to anyone!"

Beca digs her teeth into her lip, her heart shattering. "I know you don't, bug, but I promise that it is not going to be scary – the person is going to be super nice and—"

"No! Why can't we just stay here!"

At any other point in time, Beca might be glad that Callie wants to stay in New York more than she wants to go to Los Angeles and have to take part in the evaluation, but a bigger part of Beca knows that that desire is more from fear than anything else. "Sweetheart, you aren't going to be alone. I'm going to be there, and Emily and Chloe are coming, too…"

Callie sniffles, rubbing her fist into her eye. "They are?"

Emily nods encouragingly. "We are. And when we aren't talking to the nice person, Mama told me that we're going to go to the park and maybe even the library." Emily raises her eyebrows in excitement. "How does that sound?"

"Can we see Karla?" The emotions are clear in Callie's voice, and it makes Beca's heart ache even more.

But at least this is one answer that Beca can give her.

"It was going to be a surprise, but yes, Karla is very excited to see you two."

Henry's jaw drops open, and Beca can see the excitement building in Callie, too. "'Gonna see Karla?"

Beca chuckles. "Yes, we're going to see Karla. I talked to her the other day. She misses you both very much and is very happy that we're going to be there so she can see you."

"How does that sound, Cal?" Emily asks gently.

Eventually, Callie nods, seeming more defeated than anything. "Okay."

Emily pushes a little further. "Do you have any questions, sweetie?"

Callie tugs on the end of the braid that Chloe wove her hair into after her shower. She shakes her head and asks quietly, "Can I go play with Bella, now?"

Beca sighs. "You can, bug. But just for a little while… it's almost bedtime."

Callie doesn't wait for an answer, simply pushing herself off of the ground and walking out of the room with her head bent slightly toward the floor. Henry briefly leans into Beca's chest, giving her a half hug before getting up as well, and running in the direction of his sister.

When Beca hears them finish climbing down the stairs, she hangs her head in defeat. "I should've stayed in LA."

Emily turns so that she's facing the older brunette, shaking her head despite the fact that Beca can't see her. "And what would that have accomplished, Bec?"

Beca scoffs. "Not having to traumatize my kids."

"So instead, you would just put them – and yourself – in a situation where your abusive husband was escalating, and could hurt any one of you at any given time?" Emily doesn't exactly wait for an answer before continuing. "You aren't traumatizing them. They have you; all three of you have us, and everything that you're doing, Beca, is for them. You are doing exactly what you need to do to protect them. You cannot fault yourself for that."

Beca lifts her head, shooting Emily a small, barely there smile that is nowhere near genuine, before resting her head tiredly on her hand. "I hope everyone else sees it that way."


Two and a Half Years Ago

Beca aches all over. Her limbs are exhausted, her eyes are heavy with exhaustion. It's quiet, and there's only the soft light coming from the bedside table. But she swears that if she just relaxes a little bit more…

"Mama!"

Beca's fly open just in time to see Callie about to jump onto her bed. She flinches in response, and with her movements being as lethargic as they are, she can't move fast enough before Callie is landing on her leg.

Beca lets out a hiss of pain when she reaches out to try and catch her, just as Theo comes around the corner, temper flaring. "Callie Jane, I told you to slow down!"

Sighing as she brings Callie into her chest, Beca shakes her head in Theo's direction. "It's fine, Theo." She brightens as she looks at Callie's little face, her lip trembling a little bit. "Hi, bug. Did you have a good morning with Daddy?"

The sadness disappears in a flash, with Callie settling into the bed beside her mother as she nods animatedly. "Uh huh! And Daddy telled me that I have a baby brother!"

"Told, Callie."

Beca doesn't even acknowledge Theo's correction, instead, doing what she does best, and giving all of her attention to her daughter. "He did, did he? Are you excited to meet your baby brother?"

Once again, Callie bobs her head up and down. She's be waiting forever to meet the baby that's been in her Mama's belly. Last night, she had to stay with Karla, and then this morning her Daddy came over for breakfast because Mama was resting. But finally, they got to go home and now she just wants to meet her baby brother. "Where is he?"

For the first time since Callie came inside and woke her, Beca glances over at the bassinet on the other side of the bed. The newborn, already having been swaddled by the midwife who should still be around here somewhere, is still fast asleep. "He's sleeping. Do you want to say 'hi'?"

"Yes, please!" She whisper-shouts in response watching with wide eyes as Theo bends down to pick up the bundle.

Beca's stomach lurches in response.

She reaches out to take the baby from her husband, not wanting his hands anywhere near the poor child who isn't even a day old yet. He gives her the baby without hesitation, laying him delicately in her arms, before resting his hand on Beca's shoulder.

Beca shrugs it off.

"Cal, this is your baby brother, Henry." Beca looks up to see Callie enamored with the newborn, her blue eyes wide and her jaw slightly open in shock. "Do you want to hold him, bug?"

Callie, of course, nods, holding her arms out almost instantly.

"Don't you think she's a little young for that, Beca?"

Beca doesn't look at him while she answers, simply using her free arm that isn't holding Henry to fluff up the pillows beside her. "She'll be fine, Theo. Come here, Cal, sit up against the pillows."

Callie climbs over her mother's legs and sits up against the pillows like she was instructed. Beca props up one of her arms with the nursing pillow, and then gently lays Henry in her hold. "Support his head… yep, good job, baby."

She swells with this indescribable feeling of love as she watches Callie gently place a kiss on Henry's forehead, the baby seeming to settle deeper into his slumber while in his sister's arms. She hardly notices her husband's presence because of how focused she is on her kids.

It's hard to believe that she now has two of them.

Callie wasn't exactly planned, and, if Beca is being honest, Henry may have been in Theo's plans, but he certainly hadn't been in hers. That's not to say that she didn't fall in love with him the second the midwife – hired by Theo, of course, despite Beca not having wanted to go through a home birth yet again – laid him in her arms. The pregnancy was difficult. Not with medical complications, per se, more with the fact that Beca found it hard to reckon with the fact that she was bringing a baby into a house where she couldn't even guarantee the safety of her first born.

She'd be lying if she said she hadn't thought about terminating the pregnancy multiple times over the first couple of months. But even then, even when Theo didn't know, and even when he proved time and time again that he shouldn't be a father, Beca couldn't part with her baby.

And here they are.

"He smells good, Mama."

Beca smiles fondly, wrapping her arm around Callie's shoulder and pressing a kiss into her temple. "It's that new baby smell. You used to smell like that, too."

Callie giggles, getting slightly distracted. "Really?"

"Really. Careful, bug, you have to make sure you're sitting still."

Callie instantly perks back up, giving all of her attention back to Henry. She smiles down at him. "I already love Henry so much, Mama."

"Same here, Cal. And I know he loves you so much, too."

Theo comes back from where he had retreated to the bathroom, the faintest hint of a smile appearing on his face when he sees Callie and Henry sitting together on the bed. He comes up beside Beca, leaning down to give her a chaste kiss on the lips, which Beca has no choice but to accept. "We did pretty good, huh, Bec?"

Beca's arm subconsciously tightens around Callie. The sad thing is, he might be acting fine now that the baby is here, but they had gotten into an argument just last night before Beca's water broke. Honestly, she wouldn't be surprised if it had happened because of the stress.

Because, really, that's all Theo causes her these days. Stress, fear, and the desire to just get the hell out of Los Angeles. "Mhmm... We did."

Theo gives her shoulder a gentle squeeze. "Okay, Cal, let's give Mama some time to rest."

Beca's heart aches at the thought of Callie leaving – not just because she has missed her over the last sixteen hours, but because she knows that when she leaves, she'll be downstairs alone with Theo, and that's not something that she is comfortable with, especially knowing that she won't be able to easily get down there if something happens.

Not that Theo has done anything to Callie – Beca wouldn't let that happen – but he's only getting worse with her. She doesn't want to risk it.

"She's fine, we can chill out here. Maybe read a little bit, how does that—"

"Beca, you need your rest. Come on, Cal, give Mama and Henry a kiss."

Callie frowns and Beca doesn't put up any more of a fight. She helps lift Henry from Callie's arms and settles him against her chest. She pulls Callie into a side hug, holding her close and giving her a light kiss on the forehead. "Come up and visit in a little while, okay? Bring a book and we can read a little bit."

"Okay, Mama."

Beca turns to Theo. "You can call Karla, I'm sure she'll come over."

Theo shakes his head, lifting Callie off of the bed with Beca never once taking her eyes off of where his hands slip underneath her armpits. "I can watch my daughter for a few hours, Beca."

Beca's voice wavers. "I'm not saying you can't."

Callie reaches up on her tiptoes to give Henry's head another kiss, effectively ending any conversation between her parents. She's long grown used to her parents' arguing. Sometimes in front of her, but other times she has to go play in her room by herself or with Karla. "Bye-bye Henry." She kisses the side of Beca's arm. "Bye-bye Mama. I'll come see you soon."

Beca's heart swells as she watches Callie step backward. "Bye, kiddo. Love you."

Callie grins before running off in the direction of her bedroom, leaving Beca alone with Theo once more.

"I'll send Marissa up to check on you in a little while."

Beca snuggles down deeper under the covers, prepping Henry to eat as he starts to stir. "I'm fine."

"It wasn't a suggestion." Theo gestures to her phone on the bedside table. "Text or call if you need anything before then. I'll keep Callie out of your hair."

Beca shakes her head. Tears burn at the back of her eyes and she knows full well that it's not because of the hormones. "She can come in here, Theo. I want her to come in here. I'm fine."

"I'll keep her downstairs. I'll be back up in a little bit."

He gives her another kiss, this one rougher than the last, and after laying a brief hand on Henry's swaddle, leaves the bedroom, closing the door behind him.

In the solitude of the room – the room she has grown to fear knowing that when she's in here, it's typically alone with Theo – Beca looks down at her son through tear-filled eyes.

She holds him tightly to her chest, wishing, more than anything, that she could control the sobs that are trying desperately to break through.

What is she doing? It's been years at this point. Years since she married Theo – years since she could remember being happy. Yet here she is, bringing a child – another innocent, joyful child – into this god forsaken house. A house where she does everything in her power to protect her daughter, where she will do everything in her power to protect her son – but cannot be certain that there won't be a day where she can't protect either of them.

That uncertainty, the one that keeps her lying awake at night, the one that makes her consider – more than once – leaving the house in the early morning hours, coupled with deep regret and an ache of pain and sorrow that never seems to go away, causes tears to roll down Beca's face. She presses her lips against Henry's forehead, her lips trembling as a sob escapes her mouth. She holds him close, her chest shaking and her hands clinging to his swaddle… she holds him close for fear of ever losing him.

"I'm so sorry, Henry. So, so sorry, baby."

She can't help but hold on to him tighter. What has she done?


Thank you so much for reading! I look forward to reading any thoughts/comments/etc. that you want to share :)

See you next week!