Chapter 14- Loveless (Quinn)
Quinn always knew that her life had taken a pretty dramatic turn. She also knew that she was a fool to place the blame entirely on Puck.
It was her fault too, she knew that. She had failed to properly ensure that Puck had acquired protection but, less importantly, she had also made the decision to have sex with her boyfriend's best friend. She was tipsy, not even drunk, but even then that was no excuse. Her virginity was being safeguarded and if Finn couldn't have it, then why did she give it to Puck?
There was no doubt about it that he was incredibly charming when he wanted to be. That was how he had slept with countless women and they hadn't even batted an eyelash at him before allowing him into their beds. Quinn didn't like to classify herself along with the cougars, but she supposed she was just the same as them; girls that had let Noah Puckerman had sex with them. The only difference was that she was exponentially more fertile than them.
During her pregnancy, she had come across the word 'slut' more often than not. People in the hallways liked to pass out the insult basically to let her know that she was pregnant; as if she didn't already know. But she wasn't a slut. She considered a slut to be somebody who slept around carelessly, without showing real emotions with their partners. Puck was a slut, but double standards meant that he would seldom be branded as such, save by their little group and a few other people who dared to say it. But Quinn knew what he was and so did Puck himself.
She had slept with one person. Yes, she had a boyfriend who wasn't that one person, but she didn't think that was relevant to anybody but Finn. She hadn't liked to think too much about Finn. It hurt her to know how much she had hurt him. That was, until, she had come to the late realisation that she had been fooled all along. Finn had kissed and chased after Rachel while she was with him. So they had both cheated in the end. Not that that negated her mistake, but it mitigated the effects on her conscience somewhat.
Quinn tried not to think about sophomore year too much. It hurt more than she cared to admit. Whenever she thought of Beth, she thought of seeing her in Shelby's arms, looking over her new mother's shoulder while Quinn's own heart tore itself in two. Puck had admitted his love for her, but that had been irrelevant. As soon as summer had started, he hadn't even spoken to her and Quinn certainly wasn't about to knock down his door for a date. Junior year was about her and her friends. No man was getting in the way of that. Nobody was going to take her back to sophomore year and everything she had been through, least of all Puck.
So when her usually dull Wednesday included seeing Shelby Corcoran standing in front of her, smiling passively, Quinn was reeling.
"Hello, Quinn," Shelby greeted with a small wave. Mr. Schue stood in the background of the room, anxiously waiting for Quinn's reaction.
"You." It sounded exactly like the accusation Quinn had intended for it to be.
Mr. Schuester sighed and walked over to Quinn. "Quinn," he began, but Quinn shoved off his arm and shook her head tightly.
"Was I supposed to be more polite?"
Shelby swallowed. "I'd like to think that our relationship could become one of mutual respect and courtesy , yes. After everything we have shared, I would have thought that was a given."
Quinn folded her arms in a very Kurt-esque manner. "We didn't share anything and I resent the insinuation that my daughter," Quinn started, the last word becoming a croak in her throat, "is the same as some toy that we have both had the opportunity to play with."
"Beth is very special to me."
"You kept the name?"
Shelby nodded, smiling. "It was pretty. It suits her."
"What exactly are you doing here, Shelby? You have no reason to be here. You don't coach Vocal Adrenaline anymore and you already have everything you've ever wanted. You came back looking to reconnect with Rachel and walked away with a daughter anyway. Are you back for a baby boy this time?" Quinn was angry. Before Shelby had left, Quinn had asked for her not to return to Lima, at least until Quinn was ready and Shelby had agreed, her plan being to never come back and make a life in New York.
"Quinn!" Mr. Schuester scolded. "Shelby has taken great care of Beth. I didn't call you here to be rude to her."
Quinn shrugged. "Did you even think about the damage this was going to do to me? Knowing that my daughter is here and not being able to do anything about it."
"That's why I wanted you to be here," Shelby interrupted, "because I wanted to know if you maybe wanted to see her sometime. You don't have to, but the option is there. I know it might be hard. It was hard for me to see Rachel, even after eighteen years."
"Have you told Puck that you're back?"
Mr. Schuester nodded. "But I know that he's been isolated in Glee Club lately, so I called him here later today to discuss things. I thought it might be better. While we're here, maybe you should think about patching things up with him. You'll want him around if you go to see Beth, it'll help."
Quinn shook her head. "I appreciate the offer, Shelby, but it's too hard. It's only been a few months since I gave her to you and everything hurts. I know you'll understand that. As for Puck, you have to be kidding me. He's not somebody I ever want to have to speak to again unless it's to tell him how awful he is. You have selective obliviousness, Mr. Schuester, so you don't see him when he's tormenting everybody around him in various stages of maliciousness. I wouldn't let him see Beth, if I were you, Shelby. Just some advice for you."
"Quinn, you can't just…" Mr. Schue tried.
"I can and I have. It's not my choice, anyway. Shelby's her mom, it's up to her. I'll see you in Glee."
Quinn left the room, images of her daughter flashing into her mind. It was difficult for her to fully picture Beth's face as she had slowly tried to forget for her own good. Maybe it was for own her good, anyway, Quinn would never know. She would never know the life she could have lived if she had kept Beth. But she wasn't in a position to keep her. Shelby seemed to be giving her a great life. Quinn resented that a lot less than she thought she would. Her daughter wasn't loveless, at least, even if Quinn herself wasn't able to be the one giving her that love. It could have been much worse.
But, for now, Quinn had a mission to focus on. Bringing down the father of her child and the bane of her life, Noah Puckerman, with a sweet, sweet revenge that would send everything into a state of discord. And it would happen. The five of them were the angriest people she knew when Puck was mentioned. He would pay, even if it took a little time. Dragging his reputation through the mud didn't seem to be enough.
Quinn would make sure his torment was escalated to heights unknown even to her.
Because he deserved it.
Author's Note: Part 2 of the double update extravaganza! Chapter 15 should be a good one guys with a kick ass musical number performed by two of the KHHHB! Stay tuned for that! And also review! xoxo
