Alright readers, here is the fifth chapter of this story!

Now, this is a rather special chapter. This chapter will focus on Andrew writing a letter to his mom about his time at the 4077 so far. It will explore a couple of new corners with some of the characters that Andrew has interacted with, all being revealed to Andrew in cutscenes in between. There are some silly moments here just like the first four chapters, but I'm gonna try to make it interesting.

One more thing I should say before starting, beginning with chapter 7, a lot of the silly moments will start to fade away, and by chapter 8, it should show that the story doesn't have to be silly to be good, and it should get more interesting from there.

Now enough with that. How will Andrew's letter to his mom go? Find out now!


IN THE SWAMP; AT THE M*A*S*H 4077 - 14:25

Down at the Swamp, at the M*A*S*H 4077, we see Andrew spending a new day back in the swamp, by himself. At the moment, he was at the desk with a pencil and a couple of sheets of paper. Also in his possession was an envelope. By the looks of it, he was writing a letter to his mom who was back in the states. He knew exactly how to start it off, and what words to use.

Dear Mom,

This is your son Andrew Peterson writing a letter to you, saying that I have made it to South Korea safe and sound. The M*A*S*H 4077 is a pretty good place, and it does have some sights that leave me interested. Even with some of the flaws it has, I'm willing to put up with it and remain in this unit.

The people stationed at this unit are a rather diverse bunch, but they are pretty interesting. Some of them are more likable than others, but I think I can tolerate some of the craziness that goes on here.

Andrew paused writing for a moment to think about which person he should start within his letter. It then clicked in his head. He decided to start from square one. Feeling motivated, he resumed writing.

The first person that I should tell you about is the company clerk in this outfit. His name is Walter O'Reilly, but he prefers to be known as Radar since he can tell when the choppers are coming with the wounded, and whatnot. He is a pretty nice fellow. The guy comes from Ottumwa, Iowa. And get this? At the M*A*S*H 4077, he has a couple of pets in his possession. Just the other day, he showed them to me so I could see them for myself.


Andrew was with Radar as they were at the place where all of Radar's pets are being kept in the cages. Andrew seemed perplexed by this. There were a variety of different small animals including rabbits, guinea pigs, hamsters, and mice too. He also noticed there was a porcupine, a raccoon, and even a skunk. It seems that Radar had a good sense of variety when it comes to pets.

"Wow Radar," Andrew admired the sight before him. "These are all of your pets here in the 4077?"

"Oh yes, sir," Radar told him. "Interesting, aren't they?"

"Yeah," the major nodded. "They certainly are."

Some of the animals were making some noises, which Radar seemed to understand.

"Oh don't worry, guys," he told them. "This is Major Andrew Peterson, and he isn't going to bite. I'm just showing him to you because he just joined our outfit, and this is his first time getting to meet you all."

One of the rabbits kept moving its cheeks up and down while opening and closing its mouth. Radar turned his attention to this particular bunny.

"Don't worry Muffsy," he said. "Everything will be okay. That's a good girl."

As Radar gave the bunny some words of comfort, Andrew could only watch this with a smile. It was definitely nice to see Radar take part in something he likes as some type of pastime.

"So Radar did you find all of these pets in South Korea," he asked him.

"Ah yes sir," Radar put Muffsy back in her cage. "There are a lot of animals that can be found in South Korea. Most of them had their homes destroyed thanks to snipers and missile attacks. It's a miracle that they survived."

"I wouldn't be surprised, considering how many wounded show up here from time to time," Andrew remarked.

"Yeah," Radar then revealed. "These animals were left without a home as a result, so I took some of them in, and I have been taking care of them ever since."

"Well Radar," Andrew started. "That was really thoughtful and considerate of you."

"Yeah," Radar sounded bashful with the compliment.

As you can see mom, Radar has a way of taking care of pets. And I was glad that he showed them to me.

"Listen, sir, I want to thank you for coming with me to see my pets," Radar thanked him.

"It was no trouble at all," he told him as he smiled. "I was happy to check them out."

Radar nodded to that as he went back to the company clerk's office, as Andrew just stood there, seeming satisfied by it.

Aside from Radar, there's the colonel, named Sherman T. Potter. Colonel Potter seems to be a top-notch guy with how he runs the outfit. He makes me think of a father figure in a way, but that's just me.

Anyhow, Colonel Potter has a couple of hobbies that he does in his spare time. One of them involves painting. He has some paintings of some of the personnel in this outfit hanging up on the wall in his office, and recently, he got done with doing a painting a portrait of me. I told him that he didn't need to do that, but he insisted. So I wasn't gonna turn down a gesture like that.


In Colonel Potter's office, we see the colonel wearing a cowboy hat and was also wearing glasses while trying to paint a portrait of Andrew Peterson. Speaking of whom, the major himself was sitting on a stool right in front of his working area while sitting in a particular position. He was sitting down with his left leg crossed where the knee of his left leg was placed right over the knee of the right leg, with both of his hands grasped onto the left knee, while smiling, showing his teeth.

As he continued posing for it, there was something that was on the tip of his head that he had to get out of his head. And it involved the colonel. Taking a deep breath, he got it out in the open.

"Excuse me, Colonel Potter," he started. "Is it alright if I can ask you a question?"

"As long as you don't move from that position, go on ahead," the colonel encouraged.

"It just came to me, but where did you come from, in the United States that is," he queried, not moving a muscle.

"Well now major, I came from Hannibal, Missouri," he answered, not once did he deviate from his painting.

"Is that so?" Andrew queried.

"Yes. I was also a one-quarter Cherokee," the colonel revealed. "And I was assigned to [first cavalry] when I first joined the military, and I even learned about Army foot care from a fellow I once knew back in World War I, among other things."

"I see," Andrew said, taking all of that in. "That seems pretty interesting."

"It sure is," Potter continued painting the portrait of Andrew, who remained quiet again for a few moments or so.

Suddenly, he caught a quick glimpse of the black and white photo of an attractive woman that was on Colonel Potter's desk. Getting curious, he decided to bring that up with him.

"Excuse me, sir," he began. "But who is that young-looking girl in the photo that's on your desk?"

"Oh?" Potter paused to see what he was referring to. "Oh! Well, major, that happens to be Mildred."

"Mildred?" Andrew asked as Potter resumed painting.

"Yes. Mildred and I have been married for over 25 years," he explained. "I still get letters from her every once in a while since I'm commanding this outfit. Trust me though, there are days where I still miss helping myself to the pies that Mildred used to make."

"Wow," Andrew was impressed. "That's very nice to know, sir."

"You bet it is, major," Colonel Potter said as he continued painting, and Andrew remained silent for a bit.


After what seemed to be 10 to 15 minutes, Andrew finally broke the tranquility with a question.

"Hey, Colonel Potter? Can I move my legs now," he questioned. "My legs are starting to cramp a little."

"All I can say is that you don't have to sit in that stool anymore," Potter proclaimed. "Because I finished that portrait of you."

"Oh good," Andrew let out a sigh of relief as he moved his legs and then stood up. "So how did it turn out?"

"Well if you want my honest opinion, I think it came out just dandy," Potter exclaimed as Andrew walked over to take a look at it.

It pretty much captured how he was sitting that entire time.

"Sir, that looks really good," he complimented. "I really like it."

"Thank you," Potter nodded. "I'll let it dry up for 10 minutes, and then I'll hang it on the wall with the rest of the paintings that I've done. Does that sound good?"

"Okay," Andrew nodded as he seemed intrigued by the result.

Aside from painting, Colonel Potter also has an interest in horses. In fact, he has a horse on the compound named Sophie, which he tends to ride frequently. He seems to have a liking for Westerns, so that might explain it.


Andrew was now outside again with Potter, this time at the holding area where he kept Sophie; a simple brown mare. Something was amazing that got his interest in seeing one in the compound. He already saw Radar's pets, but this was on another level. And the fact that Colonel Potter keeps her in his care seemed to be wonderful.

He was reminded of the times when he tried to ride a horse when he was a kid. But he was never able to sit on one properly, and so he didn't bother to relearn it. Still, it was nice to know that the colonel had a steed to take him places when the camp jeeps are unavailable, if only for a short distance.

"Gosh. This is Sophie," he had to ask.

"Sure is. Ain't she a beaut," Potter remarked. "If I must say, she has to be the dandiest looking mare that I ever did set my eyes on."

"I can tell," Andrew nodded. "And I've already seen the pets that Radar has in his possession too."

"You know, funny you should mention that," Potter brought up. "It was Radar who brought Sophie back to this M*A*S*H unit, and gave her to me as an anniversary present."

"Leave it to Radar to do something noble like bringing an animal back to the compound," Andrew smiled.

"Yeah, he definitely has his way with animals," Colonel Potter agreed.

They looked on for a few more moments before they decided to leave.

As for my sleeping area mom, I am staying at what they call 'the Swamp' with three different bunkmates. One of them is known as Major Charles Emerson Winchester III. Winchester is umm...how do I put this? Well, I think the best way to describe him is that he's somewhat of an egotistical bore. He has a record player which can sometimes get annoying and he feels the need to have his rights and satisfaction. Yet at the same time, I am quite amused by the arguments that he has with the colonel, like how he did just recently.


Back in Colonel Potter's office, Potter was sitting at his desk, while Andrew was sitting on one of the chairs placed against the wall on the left side, while the painting of him was still drying up while near the wall on the right side. Suddenly, Charles burst into the room with a piece of paper in his hand, as he had some important business with the colonel.

"Colonel," he started. "I'd like to have a word with you!"

"You always want to have a word with me, Winchester," Potter huffed. "What is it this time?"

"I want you to take a look at this," he handed him the piece of paper. "Read that and you'll see what I mean."

And so Potter went ahead and read it after giving Winchester a stern look. It didn't take him long as he was able to respond about it.

"Oh, why this happens to be an application to join the hospital located in Boston, Massachusetts," Potter remarked. "How interesting."

"That's exactly my complaint," Charles got straight to the point. "I got that letter from the Bostonian Hospital in the city that I came from, and I have no way of applying there when I'm stuck in this looney bin!"

"Hmmm...that does seem to be a problem," Potter said thoughtfully.

"So what I want is for you to give me a discharge from this hell hole so I can be sent back to the states," Winchester begged. "I need to have this! I feel my potential doctoring skills wasting away in this dump, and I'll never be able to utilize it entirely unless I'm back in Boston Massachusetts! So you got to send me back home! Please!"

"Well, I can see your dilemma, and how it's a serious issue. I understand how serious this is," Colonel Potter said. "Therefore, permission...denied!"

"What!?" Winchester blew up, now growing furious with the colonel. "Listen, I need to be sent back home so I can apply for that hospital! I won't be denied!"

"Well being denied is all you'll get," Potter retorted. "Winchester, if I let you out of here just to work at a Bostonian hospital, then pretty soon, everyone else here will want to be let out on Groundhog Day."

"Or if we're extra lucky, we might be let out on the Fourth of July," Andrew spoke up sarcastically while crossing his arms. "That way we could celebrate our independence within the land of the free and the home of the brave."

"If I wanted your opinion, I would've asked, so butt out!" Winchester snapped before turning to face the colonel again. "Please just grant me a discharge colonel. I need this!"

"And I need you here Winchester," Potter started raising his voice. "We've been through this before!"

"And I don't see why you need me here anymore when you have that major in our outfit!" Winchester howled while pointing towards Andrew. "You now have another major here, so I'm not needed here any longer! My time and skills can be spent elsewhere!"

"Not to this commissioner, you ain't," Potter retorted. "You're here because I need you here. So just accept that."

"Colonel Potter, please be reasonable," Winchester took a deep breath. "I would like to be given my rights to be sent back to the states, where I belong!"

Colonel Potter sighed as he shook his head. Winchester was being really stubborn and impossible about this. "Take a look at that portrait of you Winchester that's hanging up on the wall. Take a good look at yourself, yapping your mouth as usual, and see how you changed the color of your face since I was out of umber."

The colonel pointed to the painting for Winchester to see, in which the major grimaced.

But what really amuses me mom is how often they would start hollering at each other. Sometimes I have to wonder if it's really a contest to see who has the loudest voice in all of Korea.

"And I told you that I am out of patience! This place is really driving me mad!" Winchester shouted.

"You think I don't know that," Potter was raising his voice again. "We've discussed this already, so just accept the fact that you're here!"

"NOT UNTIL YOU GET ME OUT OF THIS INFESTED SEWAGE HOLE!" Winchester yelled at him.

"DAGNABIT WINCHESTER! WHY DO YOU HAVE TO TALK BACK TO YOUR SUPERIOR OFFICER!?" Colonel Potter howled back.

"I HAVE MY RIGHTS! AND I DEMAND SATISFACTION SO I CAN BE RELEASED FROM THIS HELL HOLE THAT YOU CALL A M*A*S*H UNIT!"

"YOU AND THAT DAMN COCKAMAMIE RECORD PLAYER! I'VE HAD IT UP TO HERE WITH YOUR COMPLAINING ALL THE TIME WINCHESTER! YOU'RE STUCK HERE AND THAT'S FINAL!"

Through this whole argument, Andrew had to cover his mouth with his hand as he was on the verge of snickering at the shouting match before him. Winchester gave Potter a cold glare before heading for the door.

"Now hear this, Colonel! I will get out of here if it's the last thing I do!" He hollered.

"Not a chance, Major! You might as well head back to the Swamp!" Potter shouted back.

This resulted in Winchester slamming the door behind him before storming off. It took all of his willpower for Andrew not to start having a cackling fit from what he witnessed.

Yeah, as you can see mom, it really does get hectic here at times. But I'm not complaining.

Anyway, moving on. Aside from Winchester, I have two other bunkmates, both of which are Captains.

One of them is known as Captain BJ Hunnicutt. Hunnicutt is okay, for the most part when he isn't pulling pranks on me. From what I learned, Hunnicutt seems to be the dedicated family man type of guy. In fact, I found out about it just the other day, when he got an actual letter delivered to him.


Back in the hut, Andrew was shown to be relaxing in bed, when suddenly, he heard BJ shouting in a rather exciting manner.

"Alright, it's here," he exclaimed. "It's finally here!"

This got Andrew's attention as he looked curious about this.

"What is it, Hunnicutt," Andrew scratched his left ear in confusion.

"Oh it's just a letter that I finally got from Peg," BJ told him, showing him said letter for a brief second.

"Uh, Peg?" Andrew queried again.

"Oh right. I haven't told you," BJ decided to reveal. "Peg happens to be my wife."

"Ah, I get it," Andrew understood what he was saying.

"Yup." Hunnicutt nodded. "She and our daughter Erin are staying in San Francisco, California, waiting for me to come back after I'm done in this outfit. Yeah, I really do miss them."

"I can see that," Andrew said.

"Yeah," BJ said before asking. "Tell me, Andrew, have you ever been married?"

Andrew wasn't hesitant with answering that question, as he shook his head. "No Hunnicutt. I've never been married. I never even had a girlfriend. I've had several crushes in the past, but that's about it."

"I see," the captain did some thinking before making another comment. "Well don't give up stranger. You'll find your match someday."

"Yeah. I guess your right," Andrew slowly nodded before starring off in thin air. "I think..."

Andrew just stood there, taking in what he learned as BJ opened up the letter to see what was inside.

And the other captain that I share the tent with is called Hawkeye Pierce, but he prefers to be called Hawkeye. Pierce is...well, he isn't as irritating as Winchester, but I do have to admit that he can be an obnoxious prankster. Not to mention the fact that he can be quite self-righteous too. And mom? I don't think Pierce is someone you'd want to have around, seeing that he can be quite pervertic at times. And I've been noticing it too.


Andrew was seen heading to the motor pool with Hawkeye, leaving the major a bit confused and a bit annoyed.

"Okay Pierce, what's this all about," he asked him. "Why did you take me to the motor pool?"

"You'll see in a second," the captain told him.

"Right," Andrew huffed. "By the way, do you always have to dress in such a casual manner?"

It was shown that Hawkeye was wearing a Hawaiian t-shirt that was blue with white Hawaiian flowers shown as a floral pattern.

"Well no, I actually felt like I should go out for a stroll on the beaches of Honolulu," Hawkeye answered in such a sarcastic tone.

"Right..." Andrew sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose.

Something else entered Hawkeye's head as they waited at the motor pool. "You know what I'm in the mood for? Lobster! Fried boiled lobster! A specialty that came straight out of Crabapple Cove!"

"Crabapple Cove?" Andrew looked at him incredulously.

"Yeah, that's where I came from. Crabapple Cove, Maine," Hawkeye answered, shrugging his shoulders. "Be sure to look it up, and you'll see what I mean."

"Uh-huh," Andrew said calmly.

"Hey Hawkeye," that voice came from a cute-looking ginger head girl who's had her hair in a ponytail and wore a green hat on her head.

"Hey there beautiful," Hawkeye tried his hardest to sound romantic with her, resulting in Andrew averting his eyes.

"So, do we have a date for tonight?" She asked him curiously.

"Wouldn't miss it for the world," he swooned her.

"Great. I'll see you tonight." She kissed him on the cheek.

"You too," Hawkeye gave her one last erotic look before she left.

All Andrew could do was stare with such a blank look in his eyes. Hawkeye was absolutely hard for him to understand at times.

"Geez Pierce! If I didn't know any better, I'd say that you were trying out a part for a romantic movie," Andrew shook his head in embarrassment.

"Well it's like I say, I know my way around," he said shamelessly. "And speaking of which, when are you going to do something with...you-know-who?"

"Now don't start up on that again," Andrew groaned. "That's something that I don't want to talk about!"

"Okay, okay. I was just giving you some pointers," Hawkeye huffed. "Lighten up."

Andrew could only sigh and roll his eyes as he decided to leave.

But if there's something good that I can say about Pierce, it's that he is a great doctor, and he's saved a lot of lives with the surgeries that he has performed. And come to think of it mom, and this might be me being modest, but I honestly think that Pierce is a much better doctor than I am. It also helps that he isn't as arrogant as Winchester.

Anyway, moving on from there, there are a couple more people that I should tell you about. One of them is a rather strange case. He's called Corporal Maxwell Q. Klinger. He's this guy who constantly wears dresses.

I know that it's a rule that people in the army can't wear dresses or else they'll get thrown out. But that's exactly what Klinger has been trying to do; to get a Section 8 so he can get back to Toledo, Ohio. It is rather silly, but I find his attempts to be amusing since they don't seem to get him anywhere. That doesn't stop him from trying time and time again though.


Andrew was now in the mess tent, writing that letter when suddenly, Klinger storms into the mess tent, wearing what seems to be a queen's cloak, a crown, and a queen's staff, all of which looked like it came straight from England. Andrew looked up and saw that he was being silly.

"Greetings, my faithful subjects," he announced. "It is I; the great Queen of England!"

"Oh Klinger," Andrew shook his head while smirking. "You were really serious when you decided to pull that Section 8 stunt, were you?"

"You bet your carcass on that one Major," Klinger bragged. "And once the colonel hears this one, I'll be home free! Now if you must excuse me, I must greet my trusty colonel with the announcement of my royalty origin!"

And so Klinger sashayed out of the mess tent like a queen as he headed straight for Colonel Potter's office to give him the stunt.

Andrew could only shake his head with a smile on his face.

And when Klinger does attempt to pull a Section 8, Colonel Potter will always find something to say that'll break Klinger's attempt. It is oftentimes hilarious to watch, really.


Now we're back in Colonel Potter's office with Potter at his desk, while Andrew was standing to the side, expecting Klinger to be right on schedule.

And right on cue, Klinger stepped into the office like the Queen of England, as he announced the Colonel.

"Greetings fair Colonel of mine," he declared. "I am the Queen of England, here in the flesh and before my own subjects!"

Potter only looked up and looked at him as if he grew an extra head.

"More like the Queen of the Klink's," Potter huffed. "In any case, what's this about this time, Klinger?"

"Sir, I have some news! I have found out, that I have royalty in my blood, and that I'm really the Queen of England," Klinger spoke in such an overdramatic manner. "I've been separated from my dear fair kingdom for oh so long! It breaks my heart, seeing how my subjects are living without me! Therefore, I must ask that you, my dear fair Colonel, can give me that Section 8 and help me reunite with my people! You'd be doing yourself a favor by helping this fair Queen of England get back home safely!"

As Andrew smirked at this, Potter took in what he was saying. He actually had a decent attempt at a Section 8 this time, as this could get him out of the army. However, there was a catch to all of this, and he had to let Klinger know about it.

"Wow Klinger, I'm impressed." Colonel Potter said. "You really convinced me this time. You really do deserve to be out of the army with this one!"

"Thank you, dear sir," Klinger said, turning his back. "I'm on my way!"

"You're on your way to being thrown into the slammer," Potter added, getting Klinger to stop in his tracks.

"Come again sir," he slowly turned around to see what he was saying.

"You heard me! You do realize that by doing this, you could get arrested for impersonating a genius, even if the genius in question happens to be a royal Queen from the United Kingdom," Potter said matter-of-factly. "Don't you know your laws, corporal?"

It was then Klinger realized one thing; his plan was falling apart right before his very eyes. He had to find a way out of this one. So he came up with a perfect excuse while bearing a fake smile.

"Oh silly me, sir! It was just a test," he exclaimed. "I was just testing you to see if you knew that I was impersonating an important queen."

"Didn't seem like it to me," Potter shook his head. "In any case, better luck next time Klinger."

"Okay sir," Klinger sighed. "Well, back to the drawing boards."

With that, Klinger took his leave and accepted the defeat that he fell into once again, leaving Andrew struggling to keep a straight look on his face.

Yeah, long story short mom, Klinger hasn't gotten that Section 8 Discharge. That's all there is to it.

Oh, did I mention that the unit has a Chaplin too? Well, the 4077 does. And his name is Father Francis Mulcahy, but he prefers to be called just Father Mulcahy, or some of us call him Padre.

Anyway, Father Mulcahy is an okay person. He hasn't done anything wrong to me. I'd like to consider him as a borderline friend, with the only thing in the way is the fact that we don't interact much. But that's beside the point mom.

He holds services on Sundays, just like most churches in the U.S do them. The thing is, I haven't been here that long, since I've only been here for a few days. The point is that he's a devoted Christian, and he does his duties by giving prayers to the wounded that come here.


Andrew was now in the Chaplin's tent for the moment, where he had been informed by the Padre when his services were taken. And it was just as he assumed. He didn't grow up in a Christian-run region, but he has heard a lot about how they work based on what he looked up.

"So, you're saying that your services are held on Sundays, right?" Andrew felt like asking.

"Precisely Major," the Padre confirmed.

"That makes sense," the major said. "Considering that's how services are done in the US from what I've heard."

"That's true," the Chaplin rubbed his chin. "If you must know, Philadelphia has plenty of Catholics."

"Philadelphia?" Andrew queried. "Let me guess, you came from Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, right?

"You would be correct, Major," the Padre answered. "I did come from Philadelphia."

"Alright," Andrew said before going silent again.

There was something on the Chaplin's head, and it involved the fact that Andrew is usually quiet. Was it because he's shy? Or is it because of something else? Whatever the reason, he was going to find out for himself.

"Uh, pardon me, Peterson," he started. "I hope you don't mind me bringing this up, but I can't help but notice that you've been very quiet around these parts. Is...there a reason why?"

"Oh, yeah. It's because I'm just a quiet person," he confessed. "Unlike Pierce, I don't tend to be a talkative person. It's not that I'm shy. I just prefer to be quiet most of the time, unless I need to speak, or if I'm absolutely comfortable with talking."

"I see," Father Mulcahy said. "I hope it wasn't too much trouble with asking."

"No. No. It's...It's fine Padre. The people around here would've caught on to it anyway," the major said. "If not by you, then by someone else in this M*A*S*H unit."

"It's no problem at all," Father Mulcahy said. "So anyway, I do hope you can attend one of my services."

"I'll consider it Padre," Andrew thanked him with a small smile. "Thanks for the offer."

"Anytime major."

Andrew gave his farewells for now before leaving the tent, taking himself elsewhere.

So yeah mom. I decided to consider taking his services. That's all there is to it.

Anyway, there is one last person that I'd like to describe to you mom. She is the head nurse in the unit. Her name is Major Margaret Houlihan, but some of the nurses tend to call her Hot Lips...at least that's what I've been told.

Moving on from that, the head nurse has been very supportive of me since I got into this outfit. I don't know how to put this, but...I kinda like her. A lot. We became friends in this outfit because I haven't been giving Houlihan any trouble. But I think there might be more to it...

I guess. Well, you know that girls were never my strong point and that I'm not one to try to draw in a girl's attention. Unlike Captain Pierce, I'm not going to make advances towards a woman. I remember you telling me once before mom, I shouldn't be making advances towards a girl. I should allow the girl to come to me when she feels absolutely comfortable with it. I guess that's why I've been single all my life.

But that's beside the point. Since I've been here, Major Houlihan and I have made a great team in the OR, and I've been helping her on a couple of occasions when it's necessary. And I genuinely enjoy it.


In Margaret's tent, which seemed to have a rather homely feel to it, we see the head nurse sitting at her desk, itching her right leg. It appears that she has a rash forming on her right leg. She was a tough woman, but the itch was driving her crazy.

Just then, someone knocked on her tent door.

"Who is it," she asked.

"It's me," that voice was identified as Andrew.

"Come in Andrew." Margaret granted him entry.

Major Andrew Peterson then came in with some news for the head nurse, which he went to tell her after he closed the door behind him.

"Hey Margaret, I just got done cleaning the floor in the OR. And I was wondering if you needed me to do anythi-" he cut himself off when he noticed that she was scratching. "Is something wrong?"

"No, nothing's wrong Andrew," she told him quickly.

"Margaret? Are you itching your leg," he took notice of the rash that was forming. "Oh my, you have a rash forming on your leg."

"Oh," she looked at the rash on her leg. "It's nothing."

"It's 'not' nothing. It looks painful," the major shook his head. "You could get an infection if you keep scratching it. Let me help you."

"No Andrew. That's not necessary."

"Of course it's necessary. It'll get worse the more you scratch it," Andrew proclaimed. "Here. I'll put some itch relief lotion on it, and it should stop itching in no time."

"Oh Andrew, you don't have to do that," she said to him.

"But I want to help you," Andrew insisted. "Now I'll take a few moments to apply this lotion onto that rash, and it should stop itching. And I have some spare itching lotion right here."

Margaret wanted to tell him that he didn't need to help her, but since he was going through all this trouble just for her, then she didn't see why he shouldn't. Besides, Andrew didn't seem to act pervertic like the other doctors in this unit, namely a certain chief surgeon.

Andrew got out a tube of itch relief lotion and squeezed a bit onto his index finger. From there, he then knelt down and then started rubbing the lotion onto the rash that was growing on Margaret's right leg. Margaret had to admit, the way that he was applying the lotion was rather...comfortable. It was actually good that Andrew was the one doing it and not one of the other doctors. Otherwise, she would never hear the end of it.

To her, having him do this was a blessing.

After he rubbed it in entirely, Andrew pulled his hand away and got up.

"There. Now does that feel better," he asked her.

Margaret's cheeks were a light pink for a moment, as she noticed the leg stopped itching. "Yeah. It does feel better. Thanks for that."

"Your welcome Margaret," Andrew put the lotion away. "How long was it itching for anyway?"

"Not long."

"You could have told someone that it was itching," Andrew suggested.

"Sorry Andrew, but I wasn't going to ask one of the other doctors who would've had some pervertic thoughts in their minds," she told him. "I would never hear the end of it."

"I get that. Plenty of the doctors in this unit seem to act like that," he nodded in understanding. "Namely a certain Hawkeye Pierce."

"Oh yes! I especially don't want Pierce to know about it," she made it clear.

"Yeah. I have no idea what kind of thoughts go through his pervertic mind," Andrew admitted slyly.

"You're telling me," the head nurse laughed. "He's always wanting to have his way with one of the nurses."

"I think I've noticed that," he shook his head. "But still, you could've told me about it. I wouldn't go around and tell the camp about it. I'm not too fond of gossiping anyway."

"Yeah," she said. "Well, I'm glad that it was you who helped out and not one of the other doctors. Thank you."

"Your welcome," he remarked. "And I promise that I won't tell anyone about this."

"I would appreciate that. Thanks."

"It's no trouble."

Silence filled the tent for the next couple of moments or so, as Andrew decided to look around his surroundings.

"So this is your tent Margaret," he observed. "Not too shabby."

"Yeah. It fits my interest, and I'm fine with that," she shrugged her shoulders.

"Uh-huh," Andrew nodded as he began thinking to himself.

There was something else that came to his mind. Considering how he learned where everyone else that was part of the male personnel crew came from, it seemed fair if he found out about where Margaret came from. Surely, it shouldn't kill to ask her, right?

Deciding to clear his throat, he proceeded to get it out.

"Hey uhhh...Margaret," he started slowly. "I don't know if it's much trouble asking, but what I would like to know is what part of the United States did you come from?"

Margaret thought that he was going to ask something else, but was relieved with what she got instead.

"Well, I'm from Fort Ord, California," she revealed.

"Oh," Andrew sounded shy when he said that. "I don't think I ever heard of that place."

"There isn't too much to tell about it," Margaret admitted. "All that I can really say is that I am devoted to my army career."

"That's pretty...neat," one could hear the sheer amount of awkwardness in his voice; something that the head nurse didn't push out of him.

"So where did you learn how to apply itching lotion like that," the head nurse asked.

"Well it's nothing special," Andrew seemed flattered. "I just picked it up when I was studying to be a doctor. It's just being practical that's all."

"Oh," she trailed off. "I see..."

"Yeah," another question popped into the major's head as he asked her without thinking. "So anyway Margaret, do you still have someone with you, or..."

"Oh no, I'm single," she blurted out rather fast.

"Ah...I'm also single," this was getting to be rather awkward, as Andrew shifted his eyes away to make sure things don't go down in a way that he feared they would.

Thankfully, it wasn't discussed any further, much to his relief.

"Well anyway, thanks for relieving that itchy rash," Margaret thanked him sincerely. "I really do appreciate it."

"It was no trouble whatsoever," Andrew said. "I was just happy to help."

Not another word was said between the two of them, as they remained in silence.

...yeah. So you see how I felt in that instant mom. Still, I am happy to help her out. And to tell you the truth, I think Margaret likes me too. I mean she's been friendly with me, she's defended me when one of the other doctors say something mean or do something bad to me, and she enjoys my company. But I'm not gonna find out all of the details...not yet at least.


Back at the Swamp, Andrew was starting to conclude the letter he was writing to his mom.

Well, mom, that just about wraps it up, so I should close up this letter. So to recap, in the M*A*S*H 4077 we have; a company clerk who adores animals, a colonel who enjoys painting portraits and admires horses, a Bostonian surgeon who has too much ego for his own good, a family man whose wife and daughter are waiting for him at home, a pervertic obnoxious self-righteous captain, a cross-dressing corporal who is trying to get a Section 8, a Chaplin who holds church sessions on Sundays, and a rather gorgeous and attractive blonde head nurse. But I'm not complaining at all. It's no problem to me with who is at the camp.

Either way, this is where I close up this letter. I just want to say that I'm perfectly safe here, and I hope to see you again soon mom. I love you, mom.

Sincerely,

Major Andrew Peterson

And with that, the major put the pieces of paper that he wrote on and put them in the envelope. He decided to mail it out later. But for now, he decided to get out of the Swamp and take a little stroll around the compound for a bit, just to get some fresh air and see the sights.

He was feeling perfectly okay with this place, and he couldn't have gotten into another M*A*S*H unit like this...


END OF CHAPTER 5...

That's it for this chapter. I hope you enjoyed it, even though it was different from the previous chapters.

Now, this chapter kinda plants the seeds that would end up becoming noticeable in the later chapters, but most of them were subtle. The chapter also gives off more hidden depths with the character Andrew Peterson, so I hope you enjoyed it.

Anyway, the next chapter will show Andrew feeling more at home in the unit, and Klinger starts acting like he's back in Toledo, among other crazy things. How will this go? Find out next time.

Now just like before, only leave constructive criticism if you plan to be nice about it. And you can also leave a positive review if you wish.

With that, I got nothing else to say here. So until next time, I hope you look forward to the later chapters, and on that note, thanks for reading everyone!