Okay, ladies and gentlemen, this is the thirteenth chapter!
Things are really going to get good here. With how much fun that I wrote the previous chapter, you can bet that the remainder of this Arc will be just as good. And it's been helping Andrew get some necessary character development too.
One more thing that I'd like to say since it's on my mind. I like Hawkeye x Margaret as much as the next guy, but I wanted to try something different here. I hope you understand that.
Anyway, in this chapter, Klinger decides to get a hold of a chopper pilot to search South Korea for the two majors, doing what he does best, and Andrew and Margaret feel closer together as if a glow has formed between them, and some other stuff will occur too. How will this go? Find out now!
AT THE M*A*S*H 4077 - IN OR:
It was a new day in the M*A*S*H 4077. And the surgeons and nurses were in the OR treating the wounded that Colonel Potter said would be showing up. As they were doing so, there was one thing on everyone's mind; the well-being of two of their own. Not only were they feeling a workload with their absence, but things were also looking a bit empty here too. No way of getting a hold of them. No way of tracking them down. All that could be done is to wait it out and be patient.
Just then, Klinger came into the OR wearing that surgical mask with some news that he got from the phone.
"Excuse me, Colonel," the company clerk got his attention. "I just received a phone call about some news."
"Did I-Corps find out the whereabouts of Majors Peterson and Houlihan," Potter asked, performing surgery on his patient.
"No sir. It's something different. I just got a call from the 8063rd, or where they are currently," Klinger revealed. "They found a jeep not far from where the new 8063rd is located. It seems that the North Koreans who stole it had abandoned it and the 8063rd brought it back to their location. And from what they found out, they have every reason to believe that the jeep came from our unit."
"One of our jeeps was found by them," Colonel Potter gave him a curious look. "Do you suppose that that's the jeep that Andrew and Margaret were riding in?"
"Precisely what I'm saying sir," Klinger nodded.
"Good. That's one less problem taken care of," Potter sighed. "Any calls about the whereabouts of those two majors?"
"No dice sir," Klinger shook his head. "There have been choppers soaring the sky to find them, but they came up short with nothing."
"Well, I'm not surprised," Potter sighed. "I wonder what happened to them..."
"If you ask me, they probably went down a rabbit hole since they were late on a very important date," Hawkeye commented.
"Just like Alice in Wonderland," BJ added.
"Gentlemen, I'm not gonna be able to get my patient's legs treated to do the bunny hop down a hole if we keep bringing up this treacherous discussion." Charles retorted.
"Now let's not get so hasty," Father Mulcahy said. "If you ask me, I'm pretty sure they are using the alone time that they have now just to spend some quality time together, with God's approval, if you know what I mean."
"I know what you mean, Padre," the colonel added. "But damn it, it's a hard day at work without them here to help us!"
"Hey nurse," Hawkeye got the attention nurse he was working with. "Give me a hand. I'm gonna need to perform traction on this one."
"Yes sir," the nurse obeyed.
"And my patient will need to have firm pressure applied with sterile gauze. There seems to be some trauma shown towards the head," BJ said. "So it is a real hassle today."
"Anything I can do, sir," Klinger queried.
"Yes. Go back to the office and keep an eye on the phone in case we do get something from I-Corps." Colonel Potter commanded.
"Right away sir," Klinger saluted before turning around and heading back to the office, leaving the other doctors and nurses to their work.
As he was heading back to the office after he took off his surgical mask, he was really feeling resentful. Two of their best medical staff in the 4077 are missing, doing who knows what, and I-Corps has not been able to do squat to find them. They had no leads. No idea on the whereabouts of where they are currently. And they didn't even get an update on the possibility that they are dead.
It was no secret that Klinger detested the army, more than anything. He done many attempts at getting a Section 8 for that reason. And the fact that the military seems to be incompetent in the eyes of the Lebanese-American Corporal since they can't find the two staff members who work at the 4077 made his blood boil.
It's just like people say: if you want something done, you gotta do it yourself. Klinger thought.
Suddenly, a terrific idea popped up in his head. And it involves doing it yourself. That was it! Perhaps Klinger can find some reliable source out here in South Korea who could personally do them the favor of tracking them down. All he had to do was to get on the phone, get a reference to someone who is an expert chopper pilot, get him to scan South Korea in the location that the North Koreans claimed as their territory, and then they'll be on easy street.
And the first thing I must do is get on the phone and ask Sparky if there's someone that I can be directed to. Klinger found a smirk growing on his face. I feel one of my brilliant Klinger schemes forming. This is going to be good...
As soon as he stepped into the office, he went straight to the phone in the company clerk's office, grabbed the phone, and began turning the handle as a way of getting a hold of Sparky; the phone operator in the 4077. As soon as he was done with that, he placed the phone towards his ear and waited for an answer to come up.
"Hello? Sparky? Sparky, is that you? Can you hear me," Klinger spoke into the phone. "It's me; Maxwell Klinger. Long time no see, you old son of a gun."
Klinger chuckled a bit as Sparky said something to him on the phone. Klinger then got right to the point of this phone call.
"Listen Sparky, I was wondering if you could do me a solid favor," Klinger started. "Could you find me an expert chopper pilot that I can reach, and then connect me to him, on the double?"
Klinger listened to Sparky ask him why he needed this, and Klinger answered his question.
"Well you see Sparky, two of our majors; Peterson and Houlihan have gone missing and are in the middle of North Korean claimed territory, and they are in danger," Klinger explained. "And I-Corps has had no luck in finding them whatsoever. So I was wondering if you can get me to a chopper pilot who can find them instead, so we can learn about their whereabouts. What do you say, pal? Will you do me that favor?"
As Sparky told Klinger something on the other line, Klinger felt his face drop as a frown was forming.
"Huh? Come again? What was that?" Klinger felt something kick him in the stomach. "What's in it for you?"
Klinger was in no mood for any of this, as he let out a frustrated groan, and furrowed his eyebrows.
"Now you listen to me Sparky! Two lives are at stake who belong to the 4077!" Klinger chewed him out. "And all you care about is what's in it for you?!"
Believe it or not, this has happened plenty of times where Sparky wants something out of it to do something for the 4077. It's been done even when Radar was the company clerk. So for Klinger to negotiate with the phone operator, he had to give him what he could desire.
"Ugh...Well fine! If it'll make you happy," Klinger sighed before asking him a question. "Say Sparky? How would you like to make a couple of hundred bucks tonight?"
This rather underhanded side of Klinger was surfacing as he was making a deal with Sparky right under the table.
"Well you see, there's this poker game going on tonight," Klinger told him. "And I hear that the winner will be bringing home the dough. Possibly more than $200, maybe $400, if you're catching my drift."
Klinger moved his left eyebrow slightly to make it look convincing.
"Yes, it's being held at Rosie's Bar. The one near the entrance toward the 4077," Klinger answered him. "You will? You'll direct me to someone who can help with finding the two Majors? Really? Oh, thank you so much, Sparky! May camels spread good luck on you for all eternity."
Klinger felt a smile resurface as Sparky looked into the records and tried to find him the perfect chopper pilot for the job. As soon as he found one, he told Klinger about it.
"Okay, you found one? What's his name," Klinger queried. "Yeah? Could you repeat that back to me? I'm gonna write his name down."
Klinger got out a pencil and a piece of paper and proceeded to write down the name of the chopper pilot that Sparky was revealing to him.
"Alright. Charlie Koelsch Rockefeller," he wrote down the name before talking on the phone again. "Did I get his name correct? Yeah? Is he any good? Very good, huh? He's an expert? And he's an independent chopper pilot who works on his own accord? That's what I like to hear!"
Klinger heard Sparky explain all of this stuff to him, as Klinger was confident that he found the help that was needed in this crisis.
"So will you get him on the line?" Klinger asked. "You are? You're already forwarding my call straight to him? Oh, bless you Sparky! Okay, I'll wait a minute."
It was then the call was being forwarded to this Charlie K. Rockefeller person. As he was waiting, Klinger hoped that the guy was good enough to get the job right.
Come on Sparky. Get me through to him... Klinger was starting to get impatient.
Fortunately, the patience really paid off when the call was forwarded and another voice was heard on the line.
"Hello? Is this the chopper pilot known as Charlie Koelsch Rockefeller?" Klinger asked before it was confirmed to be true. "You are?! Oh, how terrific! This is Corporal Maxwell Q. Klinger; the official company clerk at the M*A*S*H 4077. Yes, it's in South Korea. Right outside the town of Uijeongbu. That's right. Listen bub, I was wondering if you could do me a bit of a favor. Let's talk turkey shall we?"
The caller was quick to notice that that was a figure of speech, and was curious as to what the favor in question could be.
"Well you see, our M*A*S*H unit has two medical personnel on our team. One of them is Major Andrew Peterson, and the other is the head nurse Major Margaret Houlihan. They were sent to the 8063rd for a presentation, but the 8063rd bugged out on them, and now they are lost in North Korean territory without a jeep or way to get a hold of us," Klinger explained everything. "We are getting some concerns that they might be dead. So I was wondering if you could take your chopper and search parts of South Korea to see if you can track them down. So what do you say? Will you do it?"
Klinger was getting a response in a rather thoughtful manner and realized that if he scratches his back, he'll scratch his.
"Well sir, it just so happens that with Colonel Potter's permission, I can get you a 3-day pass to Tokyo for R&R," Klinger told him. "Yes. It's a reward that you'll get for finding Major Peterson and Houlihan for us."
Klinger hoped that the bargain could pull through since the two majors needed to be found so they can confirm that they are still alive. After waiting for a few moments, the chopper pilot gave him a response that Klinger wanted to hear.
"Really? You'll do it? That's terrific! I'm glad that you can be of assistance to us," Klinger cheered. "Okay. You can get started whenever you're ready! And when you find something that looks to be two people below, don't hesitate to call me right away. Understood? Really? Great. Thanks for the help. Bye."
It was then Klinger hung up the call, as this new pilot was going to get to work on finding them independently. Klinger remained at his desk as he hoped that they'll be found alive.
I really hope this works. Klinger thought. I might be going behind the colonel's back by doing this. But it'll be worth finding those two in one piece.
And so Klinger stayed patient while waiting for any further updates...
AT THE ABANDONED SOUTH KOREAN HOUSE:
Meanwhile, at the South Korean House that was deserted, if one were to look on the inside, the place looked like a complete mess. No thanks to the shell fire that went off last night. However, sleeping peacefully on the floor was the two majors that stayed here overnight. They were no longer covered by the blanket, so they were shown what they were doing.
Andrew found himself slowly waking up on the floor with his head on the backpack he used. It dawned on him that he actually fell asleep.
Whoa! I was asleep! Andrew thought to himself. Wait, what's going on here?
Before he could budge, he felt someone snuggling on the left side of his chest. It felt warm and cozy. He looked down and saw that the person was Margaret Houlihan. He was a little surprised by this.
Margaret? What's she... He then started to remember what took place last night. Oh yeah. That's right. I remember now. We were sleeping in the middle of the night, and then a shell fire scared us awake, and Margaret and I took part in a...smooching fest. And I guess we enjoyed it too much that we couldn't stop. So that would explain why we're sleeping together.
Andrew couldn't help but admire how she was resting her head on his chest with her left arm wrapped around his back. So this is what it's like to be in love. Perhaps this was one of the many perks to it.
Colonel Potter you ol' son of a gun. Andrew smirked at that thought. Turns out your method really did the trick...provided that we are on good terms again...
"Mmmmm mmmmmmm," he could hear Margaret moaning as she was starting to wake up. So he remained perfectly still for her.
As soon as she slowly opened her eyes, the first thing she saw was Andrew's face, looking at her in admiration. Something about this situation screamed paradise and heaven, as Margaret didn't flinch by seeing the handsome major before her.
"Good morning Margaret," he said to her softly.
The head nurse reacted by inching closer to his face where she pecked him on the cheek.
"Good morning darling," she greeted him pleasantly.
"Well how are-" Andrew cut himself off when he realized what she just called him. "Darling?"
Oh yeah. We are definitely on good terms again if she's willing to call me darling.
"Yes," she said. "Is there a problem with it?"
"Oh no. Not at all," he shook his head. "I was just surprised by it is all."
"I wanted to give you an affectionate pet name for what you've done for me," she purred. "Is that okay with you?"
"Of course," Andrew grinned. "If you're gonna call me darling, then I should be able to call you dear, right?"
"Fine by me," she had no problem with it.
"Okay, then let's start over," Andrew then started over. "Ahem, good morning dear."
"Good morning darling," she repeated.
"So I guess we had fun last night," Andrew said.
"Oh yes," she said dreamily. "I'll tell you what, I'll go and get the two of us some breakfast. How does that sound?"
Andrew heard his stomach grumble. It seems that his appetite was coming back, and was back to the way it should be.
"Margaret dear, I can get us breakfast instead so you don't have to go through all that trouble," Andrew offered.
"Oh no. You just sit back and relax. You've gone through all this trouble for me yesterday. Now it's my turn to return the favor. Is that alright," she insisted.
"Well...okay," Andrew couldn't refuse such a generous offer from her. "Thank you for this dear."
"Anything for you darling," she said before planting a soft but quick kiss on his lips. It was for a split second, but it seemed affectionate enough for both of them.
As soon as she was done with that, she got up and went over to the backpack that had the food that Klinger packed for them. Andrew was absolutely astounded. Yesterday she was chewing his head off, but this morning, she's being affectionate with him to the point of calling him 'darling'. Being alone together probably helped. But everything made a huge leap in improvement regarding their spirits. Perhaps their kissing fest last night might've activated her affectionate side.
"So uh, what did Klinger pack us for food, dear?" Andrew decided to ask.
"Oh. He packed us some peanut butter crackers, potato chips, popcorn, and pretzels," Margaret answered. "I hope you don't mind us having this stuff for breakfast. Because that's all we have on hand."
"Nah, it's no trouble," Andrew smiled. "At least it's better than nothing."
"You can say that again darling," Margaret took the bag of food with her as she then plopped right next to Andrew with the bag right in front of their reach.
Andrew noticed that she was sitting really close to him, to the point of snuggling with him, but he had no issue with it. In fact, he couldn't help but feel a glow between them. And it felt good.
From there, they both started to eat whatever food was in the backpack. Needless to say, they were quite impressed by what was provided, as it didn't taste bad like the stuff that they had in the mess tent.
"Hey, what do you know? Klinger actually did a good job with this food," Andrew compliment before frowning, recalling what he had done and how he treated him. "Oh, I shouldn't have been so tough on him. After all, he was only trying to make up for his little goof-up."
"Don't put yourself down darling. You were just angry," Margaret assured him. "After all, I have been a bit tough on my nurses too."
"Yeah, but that's all behind us, right Margaret dear?" Andrew reminded her.
"You said it, Andrew darling," she smiled as they continued to eat.
As they were doing so, Andrew couldn't help but comment on their predicament and how they've been cuddly with each other.
"You know what? It's funny," he remarked. "Yesterday you were snapping at me. But this morning, we are acting like a married couple. But that's not so bad, is it dear?"
"No it isn't darling," she flashed him a warm smile.
As they continued eating, Andrew was getting lost in his thoughts. There was something else that was on his mind; something that he wanted to share with the blonde head nurse who was with him.
"Hey dear, there's something that I've wanted to tell you," he said. "And it's something else that I admire about you."
"Oh? And what would that be darling?" She was curious about this.
"I was always interested in your laugh," he was being honest. "Something about your laugh puts me in a good mood."
"Oh come on," Margaret felt flattered by his compliment. "You're just saying that Andrew."
"I'm serious Margaret," Andrew told her. "A lot of crazy stuff happens at the 4077. Whether it's Winchester demanding satisfaction, the colonel refusing him to get satisfaction, Klinger with his Section 8 schemes, and many others. But whenever I hear you laughing, I find myself laughing alongside you."
"Well I'm glad you feel that way," she laughed. "A lot of crazy stuff does tend to happen at the 4077."
"Yeah," Andrew chuckled. "But I'm used to it for the most part."
"You know, that's something that I find fascinating about you," she remarked. "That you can stay calm in any situation."
"Well I've been taught to remain calm and to use the thinking procedure to get out of any mess that takes place," Andrew wasn't ashamed when he admitted that. "I've been in many situations, so that might help out."
"I'll bet," Margaret smirked. "To be honest, I'm glad that I'm out here with you than any other bozo."
"Me too," Andrew grinned. "I don't think they have guys like me back in Fort Ord, California, don't they?"
"No they don't," she shook her head.
It was then she realized something. She told Andrew where she lived, but she never did find out exactly where Andrew came from. There was a bit of mystery behind that. So she decided to get to the bottom of it.
"Hey uh, darling?"
"Yes, dear?"
"I remember telling you where I came from," she started. "But you never told me where you came from."
"Yeah, I didn't," Andrew said. "But then again, nobody else seemed to care about where I came from. So it wasn't a problem."
"But I'm curious," she insisted. "Where did you come from in the US?"
Andrew let out a sigh. He wondered if Margaret would ever grow curious by his origin. It was fair that he'd give her a straight honest answer.
"Dear, the only other person I told this to in Korea is Radar," he then answered her. "I originally came from the state of Massachusetts."
"Massachusetts? You're not from Boston, are you?"
"No, no. I'm not from Boston," Andrew shook his head.
"Well then where in Massachusetts did you come from?" Margaret queried.
"Have you ever heard of a place called Attleboro?"
"No."
"That's where I originated from."
"I see," she then asked another question. "Did you live in Massachusetts right before you got called over to Korea?"
"No," he shook his head. "A few years after getting my degree and having served my time in the army, I had moved to the state of South Carolina."
"South Carolina," she raised an eyebrow. "Why did you move down there?"
"Well my mom had insisted on living somewhere where things were simpler, and I guess I can't blame her for that," Andrew said modestly. "After all, she hasn't been married for over 20 years. She's been single this entire time."
"That makes sense darling," she then questioned. "Did you ever meet your father?"
"My biological father? No, I haven't."
"Well, I know how you must feel," Margaret said. "My parents have been divorced when I was enlisted in the army. To this day, I still hold my dad in high regard as an influence to my army career choice."
"That's nice," Andrew said admiringly.
"So anyway, I've been wondering about your chose to join the army," she wondered. "Sometimes I have to wonder what would happen if you were in the marines."
"In that case, I would probably be some dopey PFC who does nothing but act like a bumbling klutzy fool and gets under fire by the platoon sergeant," he grimaced at such a thing occurring.
"Yeah. Glad you were in the army and not the marines." She admitted.
"I'm also glad I wasn't in the navy. Otherwise, I would be the first mate to a skipper who would eventually own a charter boat, and then we'd get stranded on an uncharted island with five other passengers," he shook at that thought too. "Either way, I don't see either of those things happening to anyone."
"Neither do I."
"So yeah. The army life was more for me than anything else," Andrew remarked. "And I guess it's how we got this far and are keeping each other safe. Right, dear?"
"Right darling," she smiled warmly at him. "Anyway, we should find out how to get out of here."
"Yeah, but it's gonna take some thinking to plan it out," he informed her.
She agreed with him as they remained silent, while they finished eating. There had to be a way out of here without drawing attention from the North Koreans, and certainly, a way to get out without getting caught in the crossfire. But how?
Suddenly, a chopper was being heard in the distance. And Margaret was the first one to hear it.
"Darling, can you hear that?" She asked him.
"Can I hear what, dear?" Andrew queried.
"A chopper," she explained. "I hear an incoming chopper."
"That can't be right. Radar isn't here," Andrew joked teasingly with a smirk.
"No darling," Margaret found herself laughing at that. "I actually hear a chopper. I think there's one surveying the area that we are in."
This caught Andrew's interest. "You mean that someone found out about us being missing from the 4077?"
"I think so," she got up along with Andrew. "I'm gonna go take a look for a second."
With that, she ran for the door to get the attention of the chopper pilot.
"HEY! HEEEY!" She yelled in a rather perky manner as she raced outside.
Andrew could only stare in amusement. There was something about Margaret going outside and yelling like a schoolgirl that really got him intrigued. Just then, he remembers why they were staying inside. What if some more North Korean soldiers were ambushing them from outside?
He couldn't live with that. So he decided to run outside and raced after Margaret, planning on staying by her side with attracting the chopper pilot without getting ambushed by North Koreans.
Charlie K. Rockefeller was known as a chopper pilot in some areas of South Korea. He had tan skin, and brown hair, and wore a uniform. Working independently, he found it to be a surprise for someone like Maxwell Klinger of the M*A*S*H 4077 to require his assistance to find two majors who are missing. Still, he couldn't pass up a 3-day pass to Tokyo for R&R.
And besides, he knew that the US Army can sometimes be seen as incompetent when it comes to these situations, which is exactly why he works alone. It didn't hurt to check the surrounding area for anyone, did it?
Eventually, he heard some voices calling at him from down below. He took a gander and saw two people. One of them was a man with dirty blonde hair, the other was a long blonde-haired woman. Both of them were majors, and they looked rather suspicious.
Those two look kinda suspicious. The pilot thought. I better contact Corporal Klinger about this.
Taking out the talkie that was dangling above him, he then got a hold of the company clerk.
"Chopper Pilot Rockefeller to Corporal Klinger, do you read me? Rockefeller to Klinger," he said into it, hoping that Klinger would answer.
Thankfully, Klinger was in his office having a cup of coffee when the speaker went off. Picking it up, he spoke into it.
"This is Corporal Maxwell Klinger of the 4077. I hear ya loud and clear," Klinger spoke into it. "What seems to be the trouble Rockefeller sir?"
"Well, I was piloting through the area as you instructed, and I found two people down below," the pilot remarked.
This got Klinger both curious and filled with hope. He prayed that he was talking about who he hoped he was talking about.
"Sir, would you care to describe to me what they look like?" Klinger asked.
"Both of them appear to be majors," the pilot explained. "One of them is a man with dirty blonde hair wearing a cap. The other one is a woman with long blonde hair. Do those two sound familiar to you?"
Now Klinger was feeling full-blown hope inside of him, as a smile crept onto his face.
HE FOUND THEM! HE FOUND MAJORS PETERSON AND HOULIHAN! Klinger thought with excitement. THEY'RE ALIVE!
"That's them! That's the Majors Peterson and Houlihan that we are looking for," Klinger exclaimed. "Okay, the first thing I should ask you is where are they?"
"I don't know," the pilot said. "I saw them come out of an abandoned South Korean house nearby. So I assume that they were staying there."
"Right," Klinger asked another question. "Do you know the coordinates of where they are? If so, what are their coordinates?"
"Yes. Their coordinates are..." Chopper Pilot Rockefeller trailed off when he saw that nearby, he saw a jeep of North Korean soldiers aiming their guns right over the chopper pilot.
In a matter of seconds, the chopper pilot found himself being a target to them as they started firing away. He had no choice but to retreat from the area.
"Corporal Klinger, I'll explain it to you once I get to the 4077," he declared. "I'm being under attack by some North Korean soldiers who are firing away at the chopper. I'll have no choice but to retreat from this area!"
"Okay, sir! Okay," Klinger assured. "Just head to the 4077, and the rest of the crew will wait for you at the helicopter pad! Then you can reveal their coordinates! Do you copy that Rockefeller!?"
"Copy that loud and clear," the pilot then ceased the call and headed for the 4077. Meanwhile, Klinger got up from his desk and went to see the Colonel in the mess tent.
Once he got there, he approached Colonel Potter and decided to give him the good news.
"Colonel Potter, have I got news for you," he started. "Guess which two people were spotted to still be alive. You have three guesses, and the first two don't count!"
Colonel Potter was going to be in for the surprise of a lifetime with this announcement...
"Awww..." Margaret was upset to see the chopper leave the area. "We were this close to being rescued, darling."
"I know dear. But those stupid North Koreans had to foil it," Andrew kept her close when he realized something. "That reminds me, we better get back into the house before those North Korean soldiers use us as their next target practice."
"Right behind you," she didn't object as they quickly went back to the abandoned house before they were caught and shot on target.
A couple of bullets were shot over their heads, but they made sure to duck while running back to shelter. As soon as they got back inside, they found themselves panting and catching their breath.
"That was close," Margaret said. "We must have been pretty crazy to go out there like this, huh darling?"
"Probably. But then again, we are crazy...about each other," said Andrew modestly. "It would explain why we've gotten this far. Besides, I had to admire your bravery when it came to you trying to get that chopper pilot's attention."
"Yeah," Margaret then asked. "So do you think we attracted their attention? The North Koreans? Do you think they'll find us here?"
"I'm honestly not sure about that dear," Andrew walked over to the window. "Either way, we need to find a way out of here."
"Mhmm," she muttered, hoping that she and Andrew would find a way out of this. She had to keep her spirits up. They came this far, and as long as they have each other, they should be able to get out of this unharmed and living.
Once Andrew looked out the window, what he saw next made his blood turn cold. It was a North Korean soldier. And it appears that he found out about them since he was heading this way. That was more than enough to convince himself.
"Margaret dear, I'm going to need time to think of how we can get out of here safely," Andrew rushed over to the backpacks where he grabbed them and threw them over his back. "But for now, we better hide, right now!"
"Why? Is something wrong darling," she was a little concerned.
"It's a North Korean soldier. He must've found out about us getting the attention of the chopper pilot," Andrew said with fear. "He's coming this way!"
Margaret was rather nervous about that. This kind of thing happened before when she was in the wilderness with Hawkeye Pierce. But now it was happening again.
"Yeah, we better hide," she said simply. "Then we can figure out how to get out of here."
"The only place we can hide is under that large blanket on the floor," Andrew suggested. "You know what we need to do."
"Yes. I've been in this situation before with Pierce," she said. "I should know what to do."
"I'm not gonna ask about that," he got them on track. "For now, we must stay hidden."
Not arguing with him there, Margaret followed Andrew under the large blanket where they remained hidden. They kept each other huddled up to each other, making sure that they were safe, and sharing some silent kisses to keep themselves calm.
Right on schedule, the North Korean came into the house with his rifle. Figuring he saw two Americans in this house, he searched the entire place, pointing the rifle in all directions. The only place he didn't check was the large blanket that was in the middle of the floor.
The next couple of minutes went by slowly, as the North Korean soldier couldn't find any signs of the two Americans. Once the North Korean soldier stood on the left end of the blanket, he felt struck by a dizzy spell. It was apparent that he had lost a lot of blood already, especially from getting caught in the crossfire.
After letting out a brief yelp, the solder fell onto the floor with a thud and then fell into an unconscious state. This got the attention of Andrew and Margaret as they came out of hiding to investigate.
"What the hell just happened?" Margaret asked as Andrew checked out the soldier.
"Oh no," Andrew grimaced. "This soldier has suffered a major loss of blood. In addition to that, he has a massive wound in the right thigh, and he's got severe trauma to the head."
"Oh my god," Margaret whispered before asking. "Darling, what are we going to do?"
"Margaret dear, even if we wanted to, we can't do anything about him with what we have at our disposal," Andrew explained. "He'd have to be treated at some M*A*S*H unit. And we have no way of contacting someone, so there's nothing we can do. Not to mention one of his buddies might stop by and take care of him instead."
"I know Andrew," the head nurse nodded in understanding. "But we have to get out of here before more North Koreans come in here after us."
"Exactly," Andrew started to pace a bit. "Now I just need to figure a way out of here without drawing the attention of North Koreans."
As Andrew was walking, he stepped on what looked to be a loose and unstable floorboard, which almost flew up.
Gosh. People need to be careful not to walk on these loose floorboards. Andrew then examined the board and saw exactly what was underneath.
Dirt. Tons and tons of dirt.
And then it hit him. He figured out how he and Margaret can get out of here.
Eureka! I think I figured out how we can escape from this place! Andrew smiled before heading back to Margaret.
"Dear, I figured out a way on how we can get out of here," he told her, bringing her over to the floorboard. "Do you see that?"
"Yeah. It's a loose floorboard."
"That's not the only thing," he lifted it to show her the brown soil. "Take a look at what is underneath it."
Margaret was starting to piece it together as Andrew ripped out the floorboard; allowing a large circle of dirt to be present.
"It's dirt," she said. "So wait, what you are saying we should do is..."
"Yes! We'll dig our way out of here," Andrew exclaimed rather ecstatically.
"Uh, darling? Not that I don't admire your plan of escaping, but we don't have any tools to dig with," Margaret pointed out.
"That's not a problem at all," Andrew was aware of that. "We'll just have to improvise again. We'll just use something in this house to use to dig our way out of here."
Andrew spent the next minute looking through the drawers to find something. Surely there had to be something somewhere for them to use. Then he found something. He could find the closest thing that'll get them out of here were two big wooden spoons. They seem capable enough to handle the job correctly.
"Okay, we can use these to dig our way out of this area," Andrew held the spoons out for her to see them as he handed one of them to her. "Now I don't think you'll have a problem with getting dirty while we dig our way through, right?"
"Are you kidding? I'm not some sissy girl," Margaret gave him a rather confident smirk. "I'm an army brat."
"That's the spirit," Andrew admired her confidence.
They started digging through the dirt with the wooden spoons right then and there. They kept their spirits up while digging though. Hopefully, they'll be in another area that wasn't a part of the territory claimed by these North Koreans.
"You know, wouldn't it be amazing if this turned out to be like the Californian Gold Rush and we'd find a gold mine, Andrew?"
"I doubt it. Even then, I wouldn't be too crazy about gold, since I'm not into monetary gain," Andrew was being honest. "But even if I did find some, I'd probably share it with you, Margaret."
"Me too darling."
They continued to dig their way through out of the area. This was going to take a while for them since they were using spoons. But that didn't matter. What mattered was that they'd get away safely, no matter how long it takes for them...
IN COLONEL POTTER'S OFFICE - AT THE M*A*S*H 4077:
"Hot sausage, does this seem like outstanding news," Colonel Potter remarked, as the pilot responsible was in his office along with Klinger, Hawkeye, BJ, Charles, and Father Mulcahy. "Let me tell you that my corporal might have done this behind my back, but it's worth knowing that both Majors are safe and alive!"
"Yeah. Corporal Klinger here got a hold of me to see if I can find them, saying that he was worried about them," the chopper pilot said.
"And that's not all! I've gotten some reports from the horn," Klinger revealed. "Apparently it was discovered that a hole was dug through in the house that the two majors were hiding in. It seems that they decided to dig their way out of there safely without being killed."
"So they did decide to jump down a rabbit hole," Hawkeye said. "Either that or they are trying to dig their way to China."
"Don't be ridiculous Pierce," Winchester snorted. "Every man knows that one cannot just get to China by digging through the ground voluntarily."
"Who knows? The impossible has happened before," BJ shrugged his shoulders.
"In any case, I think we should be grateful that they didn't lose their lives," Father Mulcahy expressed relief.
"Yeah, and if my coordinates are correct, they're digging their way into a nearby South Korean forest," Rockefeller remarked. "Which is not far from where the 8063rd is holding their M*A*S*H unit in."
"That's fantastic news," Klinger said. "The 8063rd can be notified about them and they can pick them up from there."
"And I'm gonna get on the horn to notify them right now," Colonel Potter said. "In the meantime Charlie Rockefeller, my Corporal will hook you up with that three-day pass that he promised you."
"Yeah," Klinger motioned for the pilot to follow. "Rockefeller, if you'll follow me, I'll hook you up with that pass."
The chopper pilot nodded as he followed the company clerk into his office. Meanwhile, Colonel Potter went to the phone and worked on getting a hold of the 8063rd. It took a few minutes, but Sherman Potter got them on the line.
"Hello? 8063rd? This is Colonel Potter of the 4077," he exclaimed. "I'm calling to let you know that you can find the doctor and the nurse you were expecting nearby. You'll find Major Peterson and Major Houlihan in the forest close to your relocated area. Be sure to bring them back to your unit to do that presentation."
After Colonel Potter was done, the rest of them were eager for the two majors to be brought back safely, with no ramifications involved...
IN A SOUTH KOREAN FOREST - AWAY FROM NORTH KOREAN CLAIMED TERRITORY:
It was now nighttime again in South Korea. But that wasn't the only thing noticeable. What was also noticeable was the fact that it was raining on top of that. It took several hours, but Andrew and Margaret were able to dig their way out of the South Korean house, where they ended up in a nearby forest. They came to the assumption that this wasn't a part of the land that the North Koreans claimed.
Because it was raining, they found themselves getting soaked by the rainwater since they didn't have any raincoats. They had to leave the two whiskey bottles behind since Andrew felt that they were from a bad year anyway, not that they were necessary anyway.
Major Peterson took one for the team where he took off his button-up shirt and used it as an umbrella for both himself and Major Houlihan. He was always willing to make sacrifices for his own belongings, but it was worth making sure that his partner wasn't suffering. By this point, the white elastic bandage that was wrapped around his left elbow was all wet and soggy. The wound was starting to heal up anyway, so Andrew slowly stripped it off.
Currently, they were hiding behind a bush while it was still raining, thinking about everything they've been through these past two days.
"Margaret, are you okay?" Andrew asked the head nurse.
"Yes. I'm fine Andrew, thanks to you," Margaret said to the major.
"Do you think we'll ever get out of this mess," Andrew wondered. "How do you think things will be like when we get back to the 4077, after finding the 8063rd and doing that presentation we have to do?"
"I've been wondering that too, darling," Margaret mused. "Once we do this presentation, how do you think we should explain to everyone just how close we got to each other?"
"Well I don't know, but I do know this," Andrew remarked. "I'm not going to stand around and let those doctors say dirty things about us, especially towards you Margaret. And as I promise, I won't be leaving your side either."
"That's true," she said. "I wasn't thrilled about them saying that kind of stuff to me."
"As a matter of fact," Andrew brought up. "When I saw those doctors giving you a hard time, I was this close to beating them up for how they talked about you."
"Now that's something I would've like to see," Margaret smirked at the thought of Andrew beating up some of the pervertic doctors.
"Yeah. I was just pissed off by everything that was happening," Andrew said bashfully. "But my point is, I'm not going to feel shame when they see me around you. I'll stand my ground just so I can stay with you, dear."
"I'll do the same with you, darling," Margaret planted a small kiss on his cheek.
Andrew really did feel like a lucky guy for having Margaret with him. But he was going to be modest on top of it, and he was treating her as an equal.
They then got out of their thoughts when they heard footsteps approaching the area.
"Who do you think is coming?" The head nurse asked.
"I don't know, but I suggest we get down just in case." The major insisted.
They then got down, wondering if it was another North Korean soldier. Turns out it wasn't. It was an American soldier; one from the 8063rd that was right nearby. After Colonel Potter called about the two majors being in the forest nearby, he decided to investigate the area. He caught notice of the two major behind the bush. As such, he cleared his throat, and the two majors realized that they've been spotted. So they slowly got up and looked at him sheepishly.
"Eh heh heh, hello," Andrew nervously laughed. "I take it that you aren't here on official business, are you?"
"You'd be correct," the soldier claimed. "We had gotten word that there were two majors from the 4077 located here. They are Majors Peterson and Houlihan. Do you know who they are?"
Andrew and Margaret exchanged looks with each other, seeing that this guy was referring to them.
"Uh, I'm Major Peterson, and this is Major Houlihan," Andrew spoke for both of their behalves. "What can we do for you, sir?"
"Why to bring you to the 8063rd, which is at the end of this forest," the soldier continued. "Colonel Potter called our unit to inform us that you guys were nearby and that we'd bring you back to do that presentation."
"Wait, we're near the location they've moved to after they bugged out," Margaret queried.
"That would be correct, ma'am," the soldier nodded. "We also found a jeep that was abandoned by the North Koreans who stole it. We've discovered that it came from your unit."
"That's great sir," Andrew was starting to feel relief. "Margaret, it looks like our problems are all over."
"And this nightmare has come to an end," Margaret smiled.
"This is great, dear," Andrew started shouting in a rather excited manner. "WE'RE SAVED! WE'RE SAVED!"
"I'm so glad this is over darling!" Margaret was just as excited about this.
They were shown hugging, spinning in circles in a rather perky manner, even kissing lip to lip for a split second.
"Okay sir, bring us to the 8063rd," Andrew smiled, allowing him to bring them back to their unit.
"Alright. Follow me you two."
They then followed him back to where the 8063rd is located, and they were glad that they weren't stuck in the wilderness anymore.
When it came to the presentation itself, it was nothing too complicated. The two of them had explained to them about what to do with a patient who is suffering from hemorrhoid, as well as how to properly treat a patient with a fractured arm, someone who's gone into shock, and what to do with someone who suffers from trauma to the head. Needless to say, they were behaving like adults and worked cooperatively together. It was little wonder why they were so valued by the M*A*S*H 4077. They remained on the subject, and they didn't give any gruff about it.
Yes. Things were starting to look up for them now, and they couldn't wait to get back to the 4077 after this is over...
BACK AT THE M*A*S*H 4077:
"Well, I don't mind telling you guys," Potter said to his main crew who was in his office. "But I'm sure glad that Majors Peterson and Houlihan are safe."
"I agree Colonel," Father Mulcahy. "It brings me great joy to know that both of them are still here with us."
"Indeed. To tell you the truth, I was...kinda worried for both of them, as much as I hate to admit it," Charles said.
"Hey, this isn't that strange. It's like the time Hawkeye got lost in the wilderness with Margaret," BJ brought up.
"Yeah, but there are two key differences here," Hawkeye informed him. "1.) Andrew is very modest and soft-spoken, and 2.) Margaret isn't married anymore."
"Not to mention that they are still alive," Klinger proclaimed. "I hope that when they get back, we give them the biggest surprise of a lifetime!"
"Hey Corporal, that ain't such a bad idea," Potter mused. "We'll show them how much we were worried about them."
"And then we can ask them how their honeymoon went," Hawkeye remarked.
"Hawkeye..." BJ warned him not to start anything.
"Okay! Okay!" Hawkeye gave in before adding. "I'll wait until after they get drunk!"
"Who says that they'd want to get drunk anyway," Klinger said before shamefully admitting. "I gave them four bottles of whiskey for beverages in case they got thirsty. But now I feel that it was a bad idea for me to give them that stuff."
"People, please," Sherman Potter got them to settle down. "The important thing is that we wait for them to get back, and make sure that both of them are as happy as a fruit fly. After all, I arranged for them to leave this unit just so they can talk things out."
"Without our interference. I do believe we've had this discussion before Colonel," Charles yawned.
"Anyway, we best get ourselves prepared to welcome them back into the 4077, right?" Father Mulcahy suggested.
"Good idea Padre," Potter stood up from his seat. "Let's get this show on the road!"
The others didn't argue with that as they got out of Sherman Potter's office to get things started, getting some of the others in their outfit to help out with the set up too...
AT THE 8063RD - THE RELOCATED AREA:
It was a long 6 hours that the presentation lasted for. But the two majors were finally finished with what they needed to do, and now they can head back to the 4077. Things for them were starting to settle down.
"Thanks for giving that presentation you two," the colonel of the 8063rd remarked. "And we're sorry that we bugged out on such short notice."
"It's no trouble at all," Margaret said. "We're just happy that this is all over."
"No kidding there," Andrew agreed. "One more thing sir, can we get some directions that'll get us back to the 4077? I don't want to get us lost again and have the jeep stolen by more North Korean soldiers."
"Understandable," the colonel nodded. "Corporal! Map please!"
"I've got it, sir!" The corporal came by with the map.
The colonel then showed the two majors how to get back to the 4077 safely with no problems. After explaining the direction they should take to get back there, Andrew and Margaret were ready to get back. One thing was noticeable. They were much perkier than they were when they left the 4077. The fact that they were comforting each other the whole time along with that kissing session caused their mood to skyrocket.
"Ready to shove off Margaret," Andrew asked the beautiful head nurse who was in the passenger seat while he was in the driver's seat.
"Whenever you are, darling Andrew," Margaret flashed him a smile in response.
"Okay then," Andrew started up the jeep, glad that it still works even after it was stolen, as he then drove it out of there.
The two majors were finding their way back to the M*A*S*H 4077. They would be in for a big surprise upon returning to the compound...
END OF CHAPTER 13...
Yeah, I think I enjoyed writing this chapter too, even though it's longer than the previous two chapters. Still, I hope you all enjoyed it too.
Just to let you know, I've planned on getting this story in this direction from the start. I just had to figure out how to go about with it.
One other thing, this chapter does allude to Gomer Pyle U.S.M.C and Gilligan's Island respectively. Although M*A*S*H started sometime after those shows were canned, the fact that it takes place during the Korean War means that those shows didn't technically happen yet. So that's why they're not shout-out and are allusions instead.
Anyway, next time the two majors get back to the 4077, some exchanges are made, and more are brought up there. How will this go? Find out next time!
You can still leave a review if you like! Constructive criticism is only allowed if it's being polite, and positive reviews are allowed regardless.
Aside from that, there's nothing else for me to share here. So until next time, I hope you look forward to what happens next. And with that, thanks again for reading everyone!
