DISCLAIMER: I own nothing from the Naruto universe but I do have an imagination of my own.
Thinking
Biju, etc. speaking
Biju, etc. thinking
Emphasis
Kakashi groaned, then noticed that his office was open, and dirt seemed to be pouring in. He reached down to observe the dirt, then realized the issue at hand. "It's sand."
"Kankuro, I know you've been following us. You can come out now," Gaara said impassively as he continued slowly pouring sand into every window, crevice, and open space of the Hokage Tower. Standing in his usual posture, arms crossed over his chest, he hadn't touched the sand in his gourd yet. Oh no: that sand was purified and precious to him. The sand he was using now? He'd been gathering that sand throughout his entire trip from his home village in the Land of Wind and continued adding on to the enormous amount he now had at his disposal by decomposing rocks and earth as he made his way through the Leaf to see the Rokudaime Hokage. "If you're not a clone, and have therefore left our sister at home unguarded, I swear I'll sand coffin you - to a somewhat painful degree."
Kankuro's clone stepped out from behind a nearby building, scratching the back of his head through his hood. If he were honest, he expected his brother to catch him, but Gaara hadn't spoken to him or "accidentally" tossed a sand attack at him throughout the entire trip, so...
It was a trip in which he'd been going at full speed with very few breaks! Especially as a clone, he was exhausted and knew that Baki-sensei and Matsuri-chan had to be, too. He let out an awkward chuckle. Gaara really should not be attacking the Hokage Tower: the Leaf and Sand were extremely close allies, but after the Kazekage heard quiet whispers of a giant toad showing up in the village, he wasn't going to be stopped from his current actions. He had watched his brother's bodyguards try, and Gaara wasn't as respectful to his brother as he was toward the two of them. He flinched even though the Kazekage wasn't looking at him. He still had a job to do, however: he was Gaara's closest advisor, after all.
"Hatake still hasn't looked out the window, ne? And you're sure he's in there?"
Gaara nodded his head, simply standing in front of the Tower and watching his sand trail up the walls. He was being given a lot of space by villagers - both shinobi and civilian, which surprised them - well, Kankuro didn't know what Gaara was thinking: his face was as blank as ever.
Gaara looked at his brother tiredly. "Temari?"
"Aa. Of course, my original is with her now. I'd never leave her side - particularly in her cond-" Kankuro stopped at receiving his Kage's glare, reminded to chose his words more carefully. "In her situation," he said, being more careful.
Gaara nodded in what Kankuro guessed was an approving manner.
They weren't sure if Temari had told anyone about her pregnancy or not, and it was her place to tell others, not theirs. They had run into Shikamaru Nara as he was on his way to their village, and Kankuro - since he was a clone on another mission - was glad to see that his little brother's taijutsu was still exceptionally good. It had been rather entertaining watching the cool, lazy Leaf Jonin that his sister had better be engaged to by now, tripping all over himself, his shadows of little use against his brother's sand and other attacks. The Nara was still in one piece of course. Gaara ensured that he had enough chakra to enter the sand, with only a little on top. Even though Gaara was undoubtedly the strongest shinobi in the Sand, he knew his brother was still a little afraid of their older sister. Her temper was not something either brother enjoyed being on the opposite side of, so Gaara left the Nara in decent enough shape to at least ask his sister to marry him.
"Ne, Gaara-sama, Kankuro-sama, Baki-sensei, Matsuri-san. Long time no see! Is this some kind of exercise with the Hokage?" Choji had just arrived and offered them each a chip, which they all eagerly accepted. Gaara had hardly given them time to eat on his way here.
Before placing the chip in his mouth, Gaara simply said, "No," and went back to watching his sand crawl up the Tower walls.
Oh no… Choji and others he'd spoken to thought that Gaara and Kakashi had simply set something up among those on duty now, but with Gaara's simple statement, it didn't look like it. He should be defending the Tower and his Hokage, but there was something about the Kazekage that was a bit off. He looked at Kankuro who just shrugged his shoulders - a "What can you do?" expression on his face. "I hate to ask this, but are you, ano - attacking the Leaf?"
Gaara sighed heavily. "No... No, just Kakashi - and perhaps another certain someone if I see that idiot." That didn't exactly make Choji feel better. Before he could say anything else, he saw Sakura approaching.
"Hey, guys!" Sakura waved excitedly. "Aa! Attacking Kaka-sensei, ne?" Gaara nodded his head, then asked about her health and how Lee was as the sand continued to rise. She chatted happily with the Kazekage and Matsuri-chan, as Baki finally sat down next to a tree. More shinobi approached, wondering just what was going on. Gaara took a moment to stretch, and that's when he saw a blur of silver and black in the Hokage's office window, for just a second as the man quickly shut the windows.
"Honestly: that man," Sakura sighed in exasperation. "Come on, Gaara-san, let's go on up. Everyone," she tried to lead the way into the building, but there was sand as far as the eye could see. Since Sakura was already heavily pregnant and waddling - not that anyone would use that word in front of her - Baki offered to pick her up and she reluctantly agreed.
"We were told to stand down!" Lion yelped at the head medic, looking like he really wanted to avoid a killer punch across the village. Sakura heard the same thing from other ANBU who were all trying to figure out what to do with the sand. Some had shovels, others were using boxes to pick up more at a time: it was a mess.
Feeling safer, Kakashi went to the window, just to make sure the Sand Shinobi were on their way up. Gaara's chakra signature was as large as his own, and he believed he was now in the building, but it never hurt to check. He opened the window and immediately ordered Rabbit to stop kick-flipping and using other crazy taijutsu moves to rid his office of sand. Although Gai's minion was getting some sand out of the window, he was making even more sand circulate through the air, and it was landing everywhere. Thank Kami he wore a mask.
Gaara took a deep breath before entering the Hokage's office. Upon entering, he would have laughed at what was happening before him if he weren't so pissed off and tired. The entire room was filled with at least three feet of sand - and that HAD to be his old friend Lee in an ANBU mask, causing even more destruction as Kakashi ordered him to stand down. The shinobis of the Leaf have always been the quirkiest and most perverted among us, just as Naruto proudly proclaimed… He cleared his throat.
"Maa, Kazekage-sama, to what do we owe the pleasure?"
"No sand burials… No sand coffins…" Gaara repeated those thoughts internally like a mantra, as he tried to keep from strangling the infuriating, laid-back masked leader of the Leaf. Hatake even had the nerve to pull his chair up out of the sand, then sat down in it - making it then sink again. Did Kakashi look awkward doing it? Definitely. Did it seem to bother the silver-haired man? Not even a little: he was even giving him that eye-smile the Hatake said for so many years that he planned to patent.
Gaara coughed, which led to Rabbit finding water immediately for him and his traveling companions. He thanked his old friend and watched as the ANBU who was definitely Lee - he'd never seen those black round eyes on anyone else - went to get tea for the party of shinobi. Kakashi's secretary and other civilians had been ordered out of the building when the sand began entering the Tower for their safety.
"Kakashi-sama, thank you for sending Nara... Shikamaru, to my village. We met him during our travels here. I trust that he is… negotiating with my brother, whom I've left in charge along with Temari-hime," Gaara said, now sitting comfortably in a sand chair he'd made for himself.
"Maa, no problem, Gaara-sama! He'd just been sitting in a cell or occasionally taking D-ranked missions," Kakashi replied, then sipped his tea.
Good... And interesting: so I'm not the only one who's pissed at the Nara. Honestly, this guy, though...
"He's been released and returned to Jonin-status. So what can I do for you today?" Kakashi asked, hoping to redirect Gaara to anything but Naruto.
Gaara reached into his belt and pulled out a tube that held a scroll he'd prepared after learning of Konoha's clone attack. "I would like you to review a contract designed to strengthen ties between our villages."
"Maa, is there a reason for this? I thought our alliance was strong, Gaara-sama." Kakashi opened up the scroll and began to skim over it. The beginning was the normal BS that contracts always began with: formalities and platitudes...
"It is, but with certain… recent events over the past year," Gaara noticed Sakura's eyes widen, but she did not flinch as she used to when Naruto was even hinted at. Another point that indicates I'm right. "...along with my own family obligations, I thought it was time to settle certain relationships and duties. And if I can enhance village ties and security? It seems a perfect time." Oh, Gaara so enjoyed watching Kakashi's eye widen, along with that slight trembling of his dominant hand as he read through the contract. You should've let me know, you prick!
"Maa," Kakashi's voice was low, quiet, and tight. "So if I understand this correctly, you would allow your SISTER to become a Leaf shinobi." Gaara nodded his head once as the others in the room looked like their eyes would fall out of their heads. Kankuro's clone held himself together, hoping he wouldn't pop just yet.
"Have you reached what I wish for in exchange in the contract?" Gaara asked. Kakashi nodded his head - and was expectantly glaring at him. "Would you like to inform the others, or shall I?"
"It's not happening," the Hokage growled at him.
"But we have a previous romantic relationship. I know it's been a long time, but I believe Naruto Uzumaki will consent to marry me," Gaara replied easily.
His face! Gaara now realized exactly why Naruto had continued pulling pranks: this was fantastic.
Sakura began choking, and it took Baki a while to pat her on the back, as he was in such shock at what their nearly unflappable, usually reasonable, and sober Kazekage had said. What the hell was his former student thinking?
Matsuri-chan had let out a choked sob and turned away from the group to hide her tears and get herself together. She wasn't sure what Gaara was talking about: dear Kami, is he insane or is Naruto-sama really alive and Gaara-kun's in love with him? Her hopes and dreams of a happy life with her former teacher felt like they were instantly crushed!
Kankuro's clone? He popped. Moments later the original Kankuro retrieved his memories. He sat gaping and gasping behind his brother's desk, wanting to lock his little brother into one of his puppets for all but abandoning their big sister and coming up with this crazy scheme. This was more like something he would do if he could get away with it - minus the whole Temari thing. It's my fault: I've been spending too much time with him. He'd said something about pranks, right? ...Gotta be a prank, he hoped worriedly. If it was a prank, it just once again showed how much Gaara needed to avoid them: his little brother was absolutely terrible at pranking or even joking around.
"Leave us," Kakashi ordered. Gaara nodded his head and the two were left in the Hokage's sandy office alone together. Kakashi had to reign in his KI and even the lightning that seemed to want to form in his hand on its own. Peace, we've finally attained it: shinobi world peace. Peace… he repeated the phrase to himself like a mantra in order to calm his racing heart and thoughts.
"Why didn't you inform me Uzumaki is alive?"
Kakashi stared at the redhead for minutes before speaking. When he did, he spoke the truth - well, most of it. He relaxed in his tilted chair, then thanked Gaara for clearing the sand underneath him so that he could sit normally. "Maa, Naruto's changed. He was buried for months, and… Dug his way out," he said grimly.
Gaara looked horrified - which was really saying something, considering his history and lack of eyebrows. "So, this was not a prank?"
Kakashi laughed bitterly. "No. No, I almost wish it had been." The Hokage sat up straight, placed his elbows on his desk, and scratched his masked chin. "Maa, Naruto lost… all memories, identity - everything. It was too dangerous to let word get out that the 'hero of the shinobi world' was back when he had no abilities to protect himself, ne?" Gaara nodded, whether for him to continue or in agreement, Kakashi did not know. "I still believe that I am right in my decision to protect Naruto by keeping him hidden. Recently, things have become more complex, and… troublesome."
Gaara groaned at the last word he used, visibly wincing. Kakashi apologized. In the Village Hidden in the Sand, Shikamaru groaned at the pain he suffered from a sneeze to his battered body. Temari held his hand, as a medic's hand glowed green over him. The med-nin had to make sure that the Kazekage's brother wasn't around to witness what she was doing because the puppet user hadn't allowed the Leaf Jonin to be healed from a previous beating with iryo-ninjutsu. She knew that Temari-hime was just as much in charge as Kankuro, though - and Temari-hime was HERE. She even had her fan in the corner!
Kakashi continued explaining what he had to, as Gaara questioned him about the village-wide "prank," as well as news of a battle toad appearing in the middle of the Leaf. Certain things were not addressed, because no way in hell was Kakashi going to explain that Naruto had become a female - now known as "Naru," especially when the Kazekage wanted to take the love of his life away from him. No way in hell is that happening. Still, the Hokage wanted to retain the trust of the red-head and his village to their alliance, so he tried to persuade the Kazekage from going through with his plan as much as possible for now. "Wouldn't you rather have Temari-hime in your village at least part of the time, Kazekage-sama? I ask this in a gesture of fairness. Obviously, you have deemed Shikamaru Nara important to the defense of the Leaf…"
"He is an excellent strategist, Hokage-sama," Gaara agreed. "Despite my… anger… regarding Naruto Uzumaki's return, and your failure to inform me at your earliest confirmation, I know that you regard the Nara highly." Gaara dipped his head in thought - he was really angry with the Nara for putting his sister in this position, although he knew that it was his sister's fault as well. He sighed. "I wish for Temari's welfare and companionship - as well as her advice. As much as I hate to admit it, Temari-chan is an excellent strategist of our own." Kakashi tried to interrupt but Gaara continued, "I would miss her more as the sister who has believed in me, as much as I would miss her counsel on important meetings within the Sand."
Kakashi understood completely. Now that they were getting somewhere, it was time to address Naru-chan.
"The Sand does not allow marriage between those of the same sex," the Hokage bluffed.
"Indeed, Hokage-sama," Gaara's lips involuntarily curled up into a smirk that he tried to hide. "However, things are always changing and evolving as time progresses, ne?" Kakashi nodded, but his face showed how uncomfortable he was. "Hokage-sama: I miss my friend," he said honestly.
"Naruto is not here, Gaara," Kakashi involuntarily omitted the honorifics needed at the moment. He was so tired of this shit! "It seems that either Naruto summoned a toad, or a toad came after him." He shook his head, as if still in disbelief over the whole situation.
Gaara was rather genuinely smiling now - and wasn't that weird? Maybe Naruto had seen that smile, but who else had? Yikes…
"You have no idea of when Naruto will return?"
Kakashi replied truthfully. "I had no idea Naruto could even still summon!" He sat back at his desk, wondering how far this would go on.
"Very well, then. Upon arrival, you will inform Naruto of my proposal?" Gaara asked - and Kakashi would forever swear that the Kazekage was trying to hide something from him. "If you would allow us to remain in the village for another 12 hours or so, to recuperate…" Kakashi agreed easily. "Very well. Should Naruto return at that time, I request the opportunity to speak with him. Otherwise, I would ask you to inform Naruto of my proposal at once?" Kakashi grudgingly nodded his head, which apparently ended their business.
Kakashi was thankful that Gaara left. He immediately ordered his ANBU to clean up the sandy mess in the building, just as he spotted the Demon of the Leaf, Tora, in his office, squatting in the corner. "Stupid fucking cat: I will END you and bring those D-ranks to a close!" Tora jumped out the door as Kakashi steamed over the "present" the damn cat left. Kami: the cat defecates like a horse! He called an additional squad in to help, resentful of the fact that Tora missions supplied so much income to the village.
The sand shinobi finally left the village and the Hokage continued wondering how his beloved was fairing. He could only hope that Naru was still on Mt. Myoboku in the care of her allies. He pulled out his favorite book as he laid back on his pillow. Just as he was close to sleep, that freaking messenger toad he'd been left with pounced down on his face, then turned and sat on his chest.
"Incoming crybaby," the little amphibian stated, as another larger toad appeared on the floor with a POOF.
The large toad spat out a blonde woman who was shivering, covered with toad saliva - or mucus - whatever the hell it was…
"Naru-chan!" Kakashi exclaimed. The woman continued to lie there, staring at him in disbelief.
"You - you're… alive?!" Naru asked, shivering all over.
A/N: Yes, we're heading toward the end, my lovely readers!
