A hare sitting behind a news desk appeared on the tv screen. The name Kaoru the Hare was hoveering above her head. "We interrupt your regularly scheduled program, Smurf's: Finally Captured, for a boring advertisement."
A voice came on over the speakers of the commercial studio and said, "Kaoru...please don't tell me we are starting this again...The Smurfs are still alive and well in their village. Why would they get captured? These people were watching Scooby-Doo...And how do you expect to sell anything if you call your advertisements boring?"
"Uh...sure. Right. Of course my advertisements aren't boring. Now, I'm going to sell you something that just may ruin your life."
"Kaoru, it's a wonder you ever sell anything," the voice said from the speakers;
"I'm not sure I asked your opinion disembodied voice." Kaoru said in a sugary sweet voice.
"I'M YOUR DIRECTOR!" the voice yelled loudly, causing the speakers to pop slightly.
"Silly, disembodied voices can't be directors," Kaoru giggled.
"Oy, I need a drink," the director mummbled.
"We can still hear you..."
The director could be heard choking back a scream of annoyance and three clicks were heard as the speakers were turned off.
"Anyhow, like I was saying. Today I am going to sell you the WORLDS GREATEST DOLL called Cream: Tickle Party. (This doll is in no way a rip off of Tickle Me Elmo.) Does not come with Cheese doll. And this doll is ONLY 693,594 Euros. That's right! Euros! From Europe! Ja!
"This doll is 2 ft tall and has Cream The Rabbit's COMPLETE PERSONALITY! Or rather the personality she had three years ago when she was six. Well, except the six year old innocent cuteness, so she is really just a cry baby. In fact, if you get close enough to actually "tickle" this doll, she will panic and start crying. And there is absolutely no way to make her stop crying."
The speakers clicked back on and the director said, "Kaoru," with a tone of warning.
"OKAY! Fine, there is one way to make her stop crying, but...I'm not going to tell you."
"KAORU!"
"You never let me have any fun... The only way to make Cream stop crying is to buy our very expensive, sold separately Cheese doll! We, at Kaoru's Toyland, have made TONS of Chao dolls to sell but only ONE Cheese doll. And because we cannot tell the difference between the Chaos, in fact the only thing that can tell the difference is the Cream doll, we are going to label them all as Cheese and sell them to you at various high prices. That's right! Your Chao doll can cost anywhere from 6,389,394 to 106,397,239,938 pesos! That's right, PESOS! FROM PESA! Supply and Demand my friend, supply and demand. And remember kids, the only thing to stop our adorable Cream doll from crying is to give her the actual Cheese doll. So, you are either going to have to buy multiple Chaos or be EXTREMELY lucky! But personally, I'd buy multiple Chaos. Chaos are so much fun to play with.
"Now, let's hear some reviews from some of our satisfied customers:"
The camera skipped over to a very distraught Cream, "IS THIS SUPPOSE TO BE ME? THIS IS NOTHING LIKE ME? WHO DID THIS?"
"It was Kaoru," the camera man told her.
"WHAT? I THOUGHT SHE WAS MY FRIEND!" Cream whined slightly.
The screen jumped over to Sonic, who was lying on the roof of Amy's house, "Huh? Toy? Is that what this is?" He picked up the thrashing and crying Cream toy. "I thought this was really Cream."
Somewhere off camera Cream could be heard running of crying.
Sonic nodded, "Yup. Don't see a difference. I have to go after her now." Sonic ran off after her.
The screen jumped to a guy standing in front of McDonalds and he was holding our doll, "WHAT? I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE CRYING!"
"See? Our toy is GREAT! Warning: We are not responsible for loss of hearing or OhNoI'mYankingOutMyOwnHair Syndrome. So come on down to Kaoru's Toyland and get your very own Cream: Tickle Party! today! We now return you to your regularly scheduled program, Pink Panther: The Early Years."
The director sighed loudly, "Scooby-Doo."
A/N
Kaoru obviously does things her own way and has very selective hearing. Maybe one day she'll actually listen to her director.
Kaoru calls her director Mr. Disembodied Voic because she has never actually SEEN her director except for the day she hired him. She never sees him face to face and therefore forgot (Or perhaps thought it funner to forget) that he isn't "Just a voice" She will only evercall him 'Mr. Director' or 'Mr. Disembodied voice.' His identity is unknown.
