DISCLAIMER: I own nothing from the Naruto universe but I do have an imagination of my own.


Thinking

Emphasis

Biju, etc. speaking

Biju, etc. thinking


Kurama yawned and began to speak, "Hmm... They're on their way to..." The fox suddenly stopped and looked concerned. "Naruto has engaged in battle close to Uzushiogakure."

"WHAT?!


"Oi!"

Tsunade was definitely going to pound someone, and with Naruto's outrageous greeting after walking straight into a possible trap in front of those attempting to enter Uzushiogakure past the beach they were on, it looked like the first person she'd hit would be Naruto. She couldn't believe the blonde little nightmare that was her granddaughter-figure would just walk up to potential enemies and show herself.

She should have known. Damnit! Why can't Naruto ever be conservative?! We have an interview to get to - not to mention that she's expecting! Tsunade hadn't planned on either of them fighting at all! Thinking back, she should've realized that with Naruto, anything goes...

"I thought you wanted to hit Kiri first, before we looked for the key to the seal array, Naruto," Tsunade questioned her granddaughter-figure harshly. Her head was spinning from the bloody Hiraishin and because the idiot decided to change her destination midway. How the hell did she even do that?!

"Meh, Uzushio's close, so I figured why not, right?!" The two women walked in silence before Naruto grabbed Tsunade's arm.

"On the coast," Naruto began and Tsunade steeled herself, looking at Naruto's focused glare, tight voice, and the way her eyes seemed to be tracking something that she was sure no one else could see. "12 Jonin-level shinobi, but I swear... Something's off about the others. Call me crazy, but there are at least four without chakra. And I mean, they don't have ANY chakra. Like they're not... Fuck. This is the first time I've seen it. Ero-sennin warned me!"

"Naruto, you can't fight right now. We need to get reinforcements!"

"It'll be too late if they get in! Hang on," Naruto said with a grim determination in her voice. Tsunade's world once again started spinning as she was pulled through Naruto's father's damn jutsu again.

"Did you dumbasses hear me? I said 'Oi!' State your names and your purpose here." Perhaps I'm being rude? Whaa! It's such a pain to be constantly questioning myself! "Also, you can tell me your likes and dislikes, and hopes and dreams," Naruto said, not quite remembering where she'd heard that before. It seems familiar, though. Glancing at her traveling companion, Naruto had a terrible premonition that she'd be beaten into dust by the old woman for running off at the mouth like that. Yikes!

"Impossible," Jonin 4 muttered beneath his breath as he took a step back from the scroll he had on the sand.

"I told you there was word that he survived," Blanko 1 said, sounding a little panicked. He began to reach for the black case next to him, but Jonin 1 shook his head at him urgently, silently urging him not to get ahead of himself.

"Why don't you tell me what you bozos think you're doing here? This island is a protectorate of The Land of Fire and Konoha, I think," Naruto said, wondering how she even knew this, or if it was really true.

"It is," Tsunade finally spoke up. Naruto noticed that she looked angry - everyone else noticed this as well, apparently, as a few of the Jonin-level shinobi paled. Whether or not they're wearing a headband, they're dangerous. The others just stared at Tsunade, before looking back at Naruto. They were definitely more afraid of the younger of the two of them, which Naruto felt was a mistake on their part.

"We don't want any trouble," Jonin 6 said, but his hands were too close together for Naruto's liking as he raised them up to supposedly show that he was either surrendering or just placating them until he could perform a jutsu. Everything in her screamed his plan was the latter.

"Why don't you tell me why you're here then?" Naruto asked. Her clones hiding north of them behind some debris needed time to take in natural energy in order for her to fight in Sage Mode. She remembered her talk with Ma when she first left Wave Country to go see the toads and hoped that she wouldn't have to use them. Actually, she hoped she wouldn't have to fight at all: that these asshats would see reason.

"I believe you can safely fight and use Sage Mode in your first trimester, Naruto-chan, but beginning around your second, you'll only have half the power so there's no reason you should use it, and many reasons you shouldn't use it at all. You should only engage in Sage Mode at that point if it's an absolute emergency and your life is on the line. Understand me clearly, young one: only do it if YOU and your tadpoles could die otherwise; you'll have to count on those around you to fight for themselves!"

"I can't do that if my loved ones are in danger! And why can't I keep using it after the first trimester? And what exactly do you mean about around then? And.."

"Hush! Naruto-chan, as far as history records, you are the ONLY female to have ever become a Sage! Because you used Sage Mode to stop Bunta - of all the stupid things to do - and are fine now, I believe it's safe to say that you can probably use Sage Mode again, but even I can't be sure for how long you can continue to do this safely while pregnant. I would certainly not advise it beyond the first trimester. You can keep yourself out of trouble for that long!"

"He was going to kill that jerk. I had to stop him" Naruto said sadly, angry tears coming to her eyes. She refused to let them fall.

"Bunta would not actually... kill Kakashi-chan. Unfortunately, we are allowed to do that, as he's taken the position of Hokage and we are formally allied with the Leaf. Dismember him? Yes. The charter says nothing about that, although I'm sure it's implied." Ma said those last words more to herself, rather than to Naruto. She focused back on her young charge, "Jinchuuriki have 10-month pregnancies rather than nine," she waited to regain Naruto's full attention and gently smacked the blonde when she began cursing even more foully at hearing that information. "You really should not be fighting at all, although you can train and use chakra..."

"Through the seventh month." Tsunade continued. "During the third trimester, especially, you need to limit your use of chakra. Housing the chakra of all nine Bijuu means you are in an extremely difficult case by yourself as a patient, Naruto. Believe me, if anyone else got their hands on you, they'd want to dissect you. Hell, I'd like to dissect you! Just a little..."

"Stay away from Orochimaru: right," Naruto sassed tiredly.

"Tch! I'm serious, brat! About most of that, anyway, and that's why I'm not leaving your side." She shook her head in aggravation. "I even accompanied you here. No offense, Lady Shima, but I'm sure that Katsuya will not be happy with me."

"Now, now, Tsunade-hime! Lady Katsuya is a good friend of mine! Such a lovely slug," Ma added as she pushed one of her most special delicacies toward her and Naruto.

"Mmm, good," the younger blonde began in a fake voice after biting into some kind of bug-churro thing. Tsunade was saved from being forced to eat hers when Naruto began to run away, gagging before vomiting in the garden.

Naruto internally scolded herself for taking her attention away from what was happening around her. No one had made a move yet, but Tsunade was getting really pissed. She wondered what the hell was in the black cases the blank guys had. One was brave enough to reach down to open his.

"If you don't identify yourselves immediately, our forces will engage you," Tsunade bluffed. She'd had enough of these assholes, and the scrolls they all had laid out in front of them made absolutely no sense to her at all.

"She's lying, Captain," smirked a blonde Jonin kunoichi. "They're the only ones here for several clicks out. The great gender-swapping sage or not, Uzumaki Naruto is only one person, and the old bitch with the jutsu hiding her age ain't much for me to deal with."

Naruto grabbed Tsunade's shoulder before Baa-chan lost it. "You refuse to give us your names? That's not only impolite," Naruto said easily, "it just shows that you're weak." Seeing the smirking blonde woman's expression darken before her cheeks flushed red was gratifying.

Jonin 5 finally decided to not only speak but step forward. "Very well. You can call us the New Taka."

"Taka?" Naruto frowned and tried to remember where she'd heard that name before. She did not fail to notice the way that Tsunade's fists tightened, though. There was a loud bang, and suddenly she felt like a relative hell had broken out again.

"Naruto. What the hell is going on?!"

"Thanks for waking up and paying some attention, ya chibi furball! The blank assholes have some kind of weapon that shoots projectiles and FUCK!" Naruto barely reached Tsunade in time to throw her out of the way of one of them. Her clone had done a great job waiting, but she was in Sage Mode now.

"That smell. It reeks of Indra. What did they do with that blasted Uchiha's body?"

"How the hell should I know?! A little help here, please?!" Jutsus were flying everywhere. Naruto pulled out a Rasenshuriken for the first time, instinctively, and flung it, taking out the first three Jonin and a good portion of the beach. Eddies began to overtake the area and seemed to flow even faster. One of the blank guys was pulled into it, screaming.

Tsunade's punches didn't do nearly as much damage on the sand, but there was plenty of large debris around to throw at the idiots who were attacking them. Pulling up the biggest piece, she revealed one of Naruto's clones who had been hidden behind it, sitting on the ground, her legs crisscrossed. Just as she put the boulder-sized piece of concrete back down to hide the clone who was taking in nature's energy, she heard yet another loud noise and her leg immediately began bleeding. Then the overwhelming pain started. "Kuchiyose no Jutsu!" Tsunade yelled, right along with Naruto, just after she realized that Naruto had just used some kind of lava-like Rasengan to melt and destroy the bitch that had mouthed off about her age.

Gamabunta and Katsuya appeared underneath the Leaf kunoichi; Tsunade attempted to heal her leg, but something was inside of it that needed to be drawn out. Then it happened. Both summons were shot with whatever those weapons dispersed. The summons didn't dispel like they would have normally, instead, they both seemed in terrible pain and were bleeding! Less than a second later, and an excruciatingly heavy pressure overtook the beach. Half of the remaining "New Taka" members fell to the ground.

"YoU HurT my FrieNDs," Naruto said in a voice not her own; it sounded like a demonic choir. Tsunade's eyes went wide at seeing Naruto produce a long black rod from her - her wrist?! Kakashi had told her about this - about the truth balls that Naruto had used during the war but seeing them appear around her granddaughter... She shivered. They were so dark, so full of a terrifying pressure that was incredibly heavy to everything around it; this was something entirely different from what she had imagined. She saw one open in front of her just as another shot rang out. She could only see black and hear screaming.


"You heard me, Pervert! Are you coming or not?!"

Kakashi had experienced the Hiraishin as a ride-along many times before, and it made him feel sick every time. This however was sheer hell!

He had grabbed the fox as he was leaving him, the furry menace had seemed to be disappearing right in front of his eyes. The next thing he knew, it felt like he was being pulled through a straw. A straw-sized straw! His hands were burning from the fox's now red, glowing chakra. The horrid sensations didn't end immediately as they did with the Hiraishin, either. Finally, he stumbled out of whatever the fox had done to him and onto a beach.

Naruto was in full battle mode and Kakashi was awed. Seeing her move as a woman was like watching a fast but incredibly elegant, powerful dance and had him momentarily mesmerized. He charged up his Chidori only to see the fox flash in front of him, biting the neck of an enemy so destructively, the man's head came off. It was beyond disturbing, especially with the gleeful laughter coming out of the small fuzzy comet of destruction.

He managed to viciously take out two more Jonin-level opponents with his jutsu before turning as a loud shot rang out. He felt his heart stop when Naruto was suddenly in front of him. She'd been hit with something and laid bleeding from the shoulder in front of him.

"Kakashi," she whispered before passing out, her crossed-red pupils on yellow irises bleeding into blue. The truth orbs disappeared around her, and her clothes returned to normal. She was bleeding. Bleeding out. His mind went back to the scene of nearly a year ago when he'd thought that he'd lost Naruto forever.

He didn't even realize that Katsuya's acid had incinerated the rest of the enemies before the slug fell to the ground panting.

Kakashi only recognized he had yet to breathe and had tears rolling down his face when Tsunade punched him, sending him flying before tumbling across the blood-soaked beach.