"I think things are going to go loads better since we stopped being just a commercial and actually recieved our own time slot. Sales have gone up, even despite Cream's accident last week, and the lawsuits weren't that bad. I've warned people before. Our lawyers are better."
A familiar voice came over the director's speakers, "Kaoru, you're on the air."
"OH! Sorry Mr. Director. Hello everybody, it's that time of the week again and before we get started I'd like everyone to notice our cast change. I am back as host as you can see and Mr. Disembodied Voice has called after last week's episode and agreed to come back on one condition: I never leave anybody else to host the show alone ever again. Which I agree is fair, don't you?" Kaoru laughed loudly. "Also, as you can see, Cream is not on stage with me, but she is now in the director's booth in training to be the director's assistant. She will be in place downstairs starting next week, watching things from down here while Mr. Director watches things from the Director's booth upstairs."
"I think this announcing everything that goes on at the studio is going to have to stop. The viewer's don't care about this, do they?" The director stated.
"Even if they don't, announcing what happens at the studio gives them a homey feel. Helps them know that we think they matter and that we think they deserve to know what's going on around here. It helps boost sales."
"Does boosting sales really matter? You get tons of sales every day."
"Yes, well, Cream announced that the toy last week only cost four cents when it really cost four cien pesetas. Which is cien means one hundred, and Cream advertised that it cost a lot less than it really did. She was mistaken in her nervousness and her drowsiness. So we have a lot of money to make up for. I'm not angry, we just need to make up a little money. Our profits are down and we have a lot to do, starting with presenting this new toy."
"On with it then."
Kaoru nodded and her tail twitched. "This week at Kaoru's Toyland, we introduced a brand new toy called EGGMAN: I'VE FALLEN AND I CAN'T GET UP! This toy is one of those toys we made purely for your and your children's entertainment and enjoyment. This toy is half the height of Eggman and twice as round. I believe that this toy is so good that it deserves a demonstration." Kaoru turned around and walked to an Eggman toy that had already been set up on the stage behind her. "To turn on this Eggman, all you do is poke him in his big fat belly." Kaoru did so and the Eggman toy began to giggle like a young school girl, which sent Kaoru into a fit of laughter. "And then you give him one of the orders from the list that comes with him. Eggman, jog." Eggman pulled a towel out of his pocket and threw it over his shoulders, and then he began to jog in circles around Kaoru. After only a few seconds of this, Eggman fell over onto his back. Then, he began flailing his limbs everywhere and started to look like a bug the landed on its back and was trying desperately to right it self. Kaoru giggled, "Eggman, stand up." Eggman began trying even harder to stand up but only succeeded in in turning himself over. He began rocking back and forth on his large stomach and moved his arms that made him look as if he was swimming. "Eggman, I said stand up." The toy started to kick wildly and his face started to turn red with the effort. Kaoru fell over laughing, grabbing a stitch at her side. "Show the video of the customers!" She shrieked through her laughter. "Hurry!"
"I'm on it Kaoru. Try and pull yourself together!"
The video had to slip through twenty clips of people falling over laughing before it found someone who could talk through their laughter.
"I absolutely LOVE this toy! It's hilarious! Just look at him twitch!" The random customer laughed. "Earlier, I got him to try and fit into a dog house! He got stuck half in and half out! I love this!
The video slipped through ten more clips of people laughing before giving up and just switching off. The screen was black for five seconds before Kaoru appeared back on the screen with a more sober look on her face but her eyes still fill of laughter.
"Looks like Kaoru isn't the only person with a laughing problem," the director said.
"Oh hush. As you can so plainly see, people are absolutely in love with this toy." From behind her, Eggman grunted with the struggle to stand back up and the sides of Kaoru's mouth twitched a bit. "Come on down to Kaoru's Toyland today to get your own Eggman: I've Fallen and I can't get up! It's only 609 iternots and will be hours of fun and laughter for the whole entire family. Warning: Do not stand too close to Eggman after he is turned on, we do not want anyone to be crushed under the weight of his fall and we especially don't want anyone to accidently catch the fatso. Remember Kids, let your parents handle the toy and only touch Eggman with a ten foot pole. Tune in next week to find out about our next toy, goodnight everybody."
Kaoru turned away from the camera and walked back over to the toy and tried to help it up. Eggman scrambled to pull himself up and got halfway there before he slipped and fell over again, screaming. Kaoru fell over again into a fit of giggles as the camera faded out.
A/N
Thanks dyslexic-Carmie for basically forcing me to write this chapter. I hope you enjoyed it.
Mr. Director is back and now I'm just pulling different types of currency out of my head.
I hope you enjoyed this chapter, I have the perfect toy for the next chapter but it most likely won't be up today.
Five Chapters in under twentyfour hours, yes, I have no life.
Have a good day
Please review.
