he-Ra and the Princesses of Power is produced by Dreamworks Animation Television, and both She-Ra and He-Man are owned by Mattel. Enjoy.
Chapter 9: Beware of Greeks
(At the same time in an unknown location)
In a dark room somewhere relatively close to Chulatown, two figures stood before a mysterious glowing orb.
One with red eyes.
One with blue.
Both vaguely humanoid.
The orb, which appeared to be some sort of mystic view screen, displayed a pair of youths, a boy and a girl, tying up a pair of unconscious Arachna.
"The Prince is most resourceful. Wouldn't you agree, Brother?" said the blue-eyed figure in a deep yet soothing voice, with just a subtle trace of what an Earthling would call a 'southern drawl'.
"Yes… very resourceful." The red-eyed figure admitted begrudgingly in a voice that sounded strangely congested. "But I have my doubts about the Princess. She is too emotional. Too much like the Whore. I don't trust her."
"Do you ever want to see our sister again?" Blue eyes asked sternly.
"You know I do." Red eyes replied bitterly.
"Then suck it up. We need both of them if we're going to get her back. Along with everything else we've lost."
"I still don't like it."
Just then, a third figure entered the room. Only this one walked on all fours like an animal, and had piercing yellow eyes that seemed to glow in the dark.
Yellow eyes slowly walked up to Blue eyes and started rubbing up against his leg.
"Ah, there you are, young one." Blue eyes said affectionately as he started scratching Yellow eyes behind the ears. "Your wounds have healed quite nicely. That's good. Because your master and his new companion are going to need your help very soon."
Blue eyes looked back into the orb and saw that the two youths were now out of the stockade and sneaking around the base.
"And very soon, we will all need the two of them."
XXX
(Chulatown, nine and a half minutes later)
Practically since the day he was born, Prince Adam had been told the many tales of his Father's exploits.
Randor, the Hero of the Great Unrest.
Randor, who conquered the 21 Kingdoms and created the Council of Tyrants.
Randor, whose military genius led his army to victory at the Battle of Infinity Pass.
It was a lot to live up to, and many people believed the young Prince would never measure up to his illustrious Father.
But that suited Adam just fine. He understood full well that he was no great military strategist and that without his Sword his physical strength was only slightly above average. But this didn't bother him either.
For Adam was not only his Father's son, he was his Mother's as well, and her bloodline was even stronger.
Odysseus.
Theseus.
Perseus.
Jason.
The same blood that flowed through their veins flowed through his own. The blood of the greatest civilization to ever grace the universe. A civilization that understood the importance of being clever.
It was around 8:30 in the evening when Adam and Adora made their daring escape from the stockade and so far none of the Spiders had noticed. Which was very fortunate, since it made sneaking around in the shadows super easy.
"Hey, Adam?" Adora whispered as the two of them hid behind a stack of wine barrels.
"What?" replied Adam.
"Those guards are just unconscious right? I mean, we didn't kill them, did we?"
"Did you see any blood coming out of their ear holes?"
"Uh… no, I don't think so."
"Then they're probably still alive."
"Probably?"
"Will you keep your voice down. We have to stay out of sight until Orko does his part of the plan."
"Yeah, about that, what exactly is your plan?"
"Ugh. I hate working with amateurs." The young Prince groaned as he rolled his eyes in frustration. "Look, it's not complicated. Right now, the Spiders think we're captured and incompetent, so they won't expect us to be out and about. But as soon as Chula finishes his paperwork, he's gonna come back to gloat some more. That's why I had Orko stay behind. As we speak, he is somewhere in this base, probably invisible, putting together some kind of big distraction that'll give us a chance to find your sword and hopefully Battle Cat. With me so far?"
"I… think so." Adora replied, half lying. "So what's the distraction?"
"I don't know. He'll probably just improvise something. Like an explosion or a loud noise or…"
"DID SOMEBODY SAY SWIFT WIND!" shouted a booming voice from somewhere close by.
Followed swiftly by a horse's whinny and a loud THWAK. In the distance, a lone Arachna was seen flying over one of the buildings, flailing and screaming, before landing roughly on the other side.
"Or… something like that."
XXX
(Two minutes later)
At Adora's insistence, the duo ran towards the strange commotion; keeping to the shadows as much as possible. Within minutes they were on the scene; and oh what a scene it was. Nearly two dozen Spiders, all armed with ropes and spears, standing in a large circle; looking tense and terrified. And in the center was a mighty beast straight from the tales of Queen Marlena. An ivory Pegasus with a long flowing mane and a golden horn which he used to stab at his would be attackers.
"Ah-ha! Take that! And this! And one these! And two of those!" the white horse declared boldly as he bucked and jabbed at the encroaching Arachna. "Come on! Take your best shot, you eight legged freaks! But just know that none can withstand the icy sting of the Horn of Swift Wind~"
"Damn it!" cursed one of the Spiders. "How did this thing get loose?"
"I don't know! The cage was locked a minute ago!" cried a second one.
"Somebody put a muzzle on it!" yelled a third.
"Not it!"
"Not it!"
"Not it!" replied three more almost simultaneously.
While back in the shadows, our young heroes looked on in amazement.
"Uh… I'm not the only one seeing this, right?" Adam asked bewilderedly. "I mean, that horse really is talking, isn't it?"
"That's not just any horse." Adora replied excitedly. "That's Swift Wind!"
"Who?"
"Swift Wind. You know. My noble steed. My sacred animal companion. I told you all about him back in the forest."
"Oh, you mean your story? Yeah… I kinda drifted in and out."
"You what?"
"Hey, it's not my fault you're boring."
"Ugh. Whatever. But what the heck 's he doing here?"
"He was locked up in a cage." Said a familiar voice from out of nowhere, causing them both to jump. Seconds later, everyone's favorite Trollan mage appeared out of thin air; floating just a few feet behind them.
"Ah, Orko. Punctual as ever, I see." Adam said jovially as he attempted to stop his heart from racing. "So I take it you're responsible for this fun little diversion?"
"Yup." Orko answered cheerily. "Sorry, I couldn't find Battle Cat. I looked everywhere, but all I found was that talking horse. I guess he was the rare animal everyone was talking about. Anyway, I told him I'd let him out of his cage if he promised to make a big, loud distraction so I could help you guys escape."
"Nice work, Orko." The young Prince said approvingly.
"Aww shucks." The Trollan said bashfully, before shifting gears once again. "Oh, that reminds me. I couldn't find Battle Cat, but I found something else when I was going through the base commander's office."
Like a proper stage magician, Orko reached into one of his sleeves and pulled out an item that by all rights should not have fit. It was a familiar looking sword with a silver hilt and crystalline blade that shone like a white diamond.
"My sword!" Adam exclaimed as he took the weapon in hand and held it up like a trophy. "Orko, you're beautiful!"
Just then, Swift Wind let out a deafening whinny and reared upward. One of the Spiders had thrown a rope around his neck and was apparently trying to force him to the ground.
"Swift Wind!" Adora cried at the sight of her faithful steed in peril.
But Adam, ever the dashing, romantic, attention seeking man of action, leapt forward, sword in hand, and ran toward the arachnoid mob.
"What are you doing?" the young heroine exclaimed confusedly.
"Saving your hay burner." He replied, pausing only for a moment to look back. "Orko, help Adora find the commander so she can get her sword back. I'll take care of things here."
"Are you crazy? There's too many of them!" Adora shouted.
But by then Adam was already gone. Fueled by righteous determination and a need for showing off, he charged straight into the crowd. Then, without thinking, he jumped onto the back of one of the Spiders, used him as a springboard to jump even higher, did a flip in midair, cut the rope with his sword, and made a perfect landing right in front of the noble beast.
"Oh my gosh, I can't believe that actually worked." The young Prince said, somehow all in one breath. "Why am I always so cool when no one's around?"
"Hey, thanks for the assist there, guy." Swift Wind said as he attempted to shake the noose from his neck. "Eh… Who are you?"
"The name's…"
"What are you waiting for?" yelled one of the Spiders in the crowd. "Kill him!"
"You know what, how about I just show you." Adam said hastily before raising his sword and shouting. "BY THE POWER OF GRAYSKULL!"
In a flash of light and 80's sound effects, the young Prince was transformed into a ten foot tall, stalwart mountain of manly might. The Blonde Barbarian. The Golden-haired Gladiator. The Bare-chested Guardian of all that was good and wholesome.
He-Man.
"I HAVE THE POWEEEEEEEEEER!"
As expected, the Spiders all stopped dead in their tracks. Save for one who had the foresight to bolt as soon as Adam raised his sword. A veteran of the Great Unrest. Passed over for a promotion six times. But tonight he was one of the lucky ones.
"Woah…" Swift Wind said softly; completely awestruck by what he'd just seen. "That was just… Woah…"
"Yeah, it's kinda cool. I guess." Adam replied, feigning modestly. "So what do you say, Mighty Pegasus? Shall we sally forth and vanquish these troublesome tomnoddies?"
"I didn't understand some of those words, but let's do it!"
And with that, the two warriors jumped headfirst into the fray.
XXX
(Meanwhile, back with Adora)
While Adam and Swift Wind were busy making short work of the Spiders, Adora and Orko were dashing through the camp under the cover of darkness. Having hung back just long enough to witness the Prince's transformation, the young heroine's mind was racing as she struggled to understand what she'd just seen.
'Oh-my-gosh! That was nuts!' she thought frantically as she followed close behind the floating Trollan. 'I mean, one second he's normal, then he raises his sword and BOOM he's a giant. Is that what I look like when I turn into She-Ra? His sword does kinda look like mine. That's really weird. He has a pretty good battle cry though. I have the power! Maybe I should say something like that.'
But before she could explore this notion any further, her thoughts were suddenly derailed when Orko's hand brought her to an abrupt halt.
"Shhh…" the Trollan mage went as he gestured for her to peer around the corner with him.
Before them, about fifty yards away, was the base of the crystalline tower, and in the shadow of that tower, Councilman Chula and his secretary Webstor were apparently having a 'friendly' discussion.
"What the hell is going on?" Chula screamed at the top of his voice. "Why is there gunfire going off in my base?"
"I don't know, Sir. Let me check." Webstor replied calmly as he tapped on his data pad. "Hmm… It would seem that our prisoners have escaped."
"What? How'd the little monkeys pull that off?"
"Again, I don't know, Sir. But apparently they've set that flying horse we captured free and are using it to start a riot." The well-dressed Spider answered. "And I'm afraid it only gets worse. According to Thrax, some animal from the forest just burst through the main gate two minutes ago."
"Damn it!" the fat Spider cursed. "This is all just falling apart!"
"Agreed, Sir. Shall I tell the men to initiate Scorched Earth Protocol?"
"And tell the other members of the Council that I lost our only foothold in the Light Hemisphere? Fat chance! If we lose this base then the last four year will've been for nothing!"
"Then what do you propose we do?"
"Get the mech."
"What?"
"You heard me. We're gonna put an end to this madness ourselves."
"So in other words, you want me to take care of everything while you hide in your office."
"Don't back sass your leader! Just do it!"
Then without another word, Webstor bowed respectfully and scuttled off; leaving the Councilman alone and unprotected.
Perfect.
"Okay, so the fat jerk's all alone. And he's still wearing my Sword on his belt." Adora whispered bitterly to her floating friend. "But he's also got a gun. So how do we get it back?"
"Try calling it back to your hand." Orko suggested.
"What?"
"You know, just hold out your hand and summon it to you with your mind."
"I can't do that!"
"Have you ever tried?"
"Well… no, but I never thought I needed to."
"Well, Adam can do it and your swords look almost the same. Why not give it a try?"
The Mage's logic was sketchy at best, but since she didn't have any better ideas Adora deiced to give it a try. So, feeling utterly ridiculous, she closed her eyes, raised her right arm, held out her hand, and thought about her sword.
'Sword~ Come to me~' she thought.
Nothing happened.
'Sword~ Come to me now~'
Nothing happened.
'Sword~ Come to me~ Please?"
WWHSHING!
And just like that, the Sword of Protection was back with its rightful owner.
Adora couldn't believe that something so stupid had actually worked, but she couldn't argue with the results. Unfortunately, before she could bask in her victory, a familiar voice caught her attention.
"You little bitch!" Chula roared as he pulled out his plasma blaster and fired six shots. "Look what you did to my robe!"
It took a moment, but the young heroine eventually noticed the large gash cut into the Spider's ornate silk robe; obviously her sword's work. Not that it mattered now that she had her signature weapon back.
"Hey! What are you doing?" Orko asked frantically as Adora jumped into the line of fire.
"Something awesome!" she replied before raising her sword and shouting. "FOR THE HONOR OF GRAYSKULL!"
And, just like with Adam, Adora was transformed into a blonde, statuesque hero of legend in a flash of light and sound effects.
"I… uh… AM SHE-RAAAAAAAAAAAA!"
"Whoa…" said the Trollan mage in utter astonishment. "So shiny~"
"Well, aren't you just full of surprises." Chula said mockingly, after getting over his initial shock. "So, there exists another who can wield the Ancient Power of the Elders."
"The Ancient What of the Who-Now?"
"Screw King Hiss and his expensive tastes. You'll be much more valuable to us on the dissection table."
"Uh… am I missing something? I'm an eight foot tall magical lady with a sword and you're an old fat guy with a gun. I don't think I'm the one in trouble here."
"Ah-HA-HA-HA! Foolish girl. You still don't get it do you? We are the Spider Guild! The true Masters of Eternia! The monsters of the Dark Hemisphere, the demons that keep you up at night, they all prostrate themselves before us! Beg us for our food and resources! As will all of Eternia! For we-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!"
It had happened so suddenly that Adora had to rub her eyes to make sure she hadn't imagined it. But sure enough, it was true. In the middle of his villainous monologue, Councilman Taran Chula of the Spider Guild had been pounced on and was currently being mauled by a very large, very scary, very green saber-toothed tiger.
"Oh… oh my gosh…" the young heroine said with wide-eyed disbelief as she continued to watch the old fat Spider get viciously disemboweled. "That… that got dark. That got dark so fast."
"Battle Cat!" Orko shouted elatedly as he floated onto the scene. "There you are! Oh, you had us worried there, Little Buddy."
'Little Buddy?' Adora repeated in her head confusedly before her brain finally caught up. "Wait, that's Battle Cat?"
"Yup." The Trollan mage replied innocently as he proceeded to scratch the ferocious beast behind the ear. "Aww~ Who's a good boy~ Who's a good boy~"
Good boy was not the word Adora would've chosen. When Adam had told her about Battle Cat, she'd expected him to be some kind of feline creature big enough to ride on. Not some enormous, bloodthirsty tiger war beast.
Suddenly, the creature took notice of the young heroine and started to make its way slowly towards her. Within moments it was standing before her. Blood and ichor still dripping from its jaws. Its hot breath reeking like a butcher shop. Its piercing yellow eyes glaring directly into her soul. It was all she could do not to piss herself.
"N-N-N-Nice kitty." She said nervously as she hesitantly tried to pet the mighty beast. "Nice giant, horrifying monster kitty."
But as soon as her hand touched the creature's forehead, Adora's mind was assaulted by a thousand thoughts and images simultaneously. It all happened so quickly that she couldn't retain most of what she'd seen, but what little she could remember made her brain tingle.
"O…kay…" she said as she pulled her hand away. "Well, that was weird."
Just then, Battle Cat let out a low growl, but to Adora's ears it sounded like plain English.
"Wait… did you just… say something?"
Growl.
"Oh my gosh! You did!"
"Wowzers!" exclaimed Orko as he floated over. "You can understand Battle Cat? I thought only Adam could do that."
"Well… apparently I can do it too."
Growl.
"Wait, what?"
Growl.
"Really?"
Roar!
"Okay, yeah, I'll do that."
"What? What did he say?" asked the Trollan mage confusedly.
"Eh… short version, he said he brought reinforcements, but they can't get in until I destroy this First Ones Tower."
"Wow, neat-o. Didn't understand that last part, but I'm into it."
"Good, let's get to work."
And with that said, Adora raised her sword and charged towards the imposing tower.
Finally, after a week of alien planets, spider people and talking tigers, smashing dangerous First Ones Tech was something she could wrap her head around.
XXX
(Back with Adam)
Of the nearly two dozen Arachna that had opposed the unlikely duo, all but one were lying dead on the ground; the exception of course being the savvy vet who'd had the good sense to run off like a coward.
Anyway, with the situation momentarily under control, our two heroes took said moment to breathe a sigh of relief.
"Oh my god!"
Or in Swift Wind's case, to have a panic attack.
"Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god!" the talking horse repeated as he started to hyperventilate. "That got so dark! That got so dark so fast!"
"Are you alright, noble Phaethon?" Adam asked, once again showing off his extensive vocabulary.
"No! I am not alright! I am a million miles away from alright! I just stomped like nine people to death! Literally stomped their guts out!" Swift Wind replied, clearly on the verge of a breakdown, before adding. "And stop calling me things I don't understand. It give me anxiety."
"Sorry, I didn't mean to be insensitive." The young Prince said soothingly as he started to stroke the horse's mane. "I know the life of a warrior isn't always easy, but you did well out there. You should be proud."
"I know, it's just… fighting the Horde is so much different. I'm not used to seeing so much blood. I… I think I need a week off from all this hero stuff."
"A week? Hell, take the rest of your life." A mechanically modified voice boomed from out of nowhere. "Whatever's left of it."
Suddenly, scuttling along on eight hydraulic legs, a mechanical spider as big as a house arrived on the scene. It was a clunky looking, heavily armored war machine painted up in basic gunmetal. Attached to either side of its abdomen were a Gatling gun and what appeared to be a surface to air missile launcher. At the head of the robotic behemoth was the cockpit, in which sat a familiar face; the ever charming Secretary Webstor.
"This game ends now." The sleezy Spider said as he aimed his weapons directly at our two heroes.
Naturally, Adam was prepared to fight to his last breath, even if Swift Wind looked like he was already on his, but fortunately it didn't come to that. For just as Webstor was about to fire, an explosion suddenly got everyone's attention. In the distance, the imposing black opal tower at the center of the base spontaneously collapsed under its own weight and fell to the ground with an earthshattering thud.
"Oh… dear." Webstor muttered nervously.
Just then the earth began to shake, as though the base was sitting on a massive fault line. Moments later, a dozen or so giant plants started sprouting from the ground. Some were enormous trees that tore buildings apart from the inside. Others were gargantuan carnivorous plants that started devouring unfortunate Spiders by the mouthful. In either case, it was suddenly clear to Adam that the tower had been doing more than just obscuring the view from above.
"You know… suddenly this seems like a bad place to be." The secretary Spider said as he started to move his mech in reverse. "So… I'm just gonna…"
But before he could finish that thought, another gigantic plant suddenly shot up from beneath the mech; sending it flying through the air and into a nearby building. To Adam's great surprise, this new plant was completely different from the others; it looked eerily similar to the giant beanstalks of Earth that his mother had told him about as a child. At any rate, the plant grew to about thirty feet high before the top opened up like a lotus blossom; revealing two familiar figures standing in the center.
The first one resembled some kind of humanoid ape-man covered in thick green fur. Its body was dotted with leaves and vines that seemed to be growing out of its skin, while its face was like a random assortment of parts that didn't seem to match but somehow went well together; specifically his long green goatee, deerlike nose, and glowing blue eyes.
The other looked like a weird fusion between the spirit of death and a cactus. Its thin skeletal body was like a human shaped collection of thorns and chloroplasts. Its glowing red eyes and hideous mouth made its face look like a jack-o-lantern, but with a mass of thorny vines that sat atop it and writhed like the hair of a gorgon.
Adam had met both of them before, each under entirely different circumstances, so their strange appearances didn't surprise him in the least. But what struck him as odd was the way they were interacting with each other. Standing shoulder to shoulder. Almost as if they were equals. Or friends.
'Moss Man and Evilseed? Working together?' the young Prince thought as he struggled to compute this unprecedented turn of events. 'What the hell?'
End Notes:
Personally, I think this is the best chapter so far.
Anyway, thanks for reading and I'll see you in the next one.
Peace.
