"Have you ever wondered what it would be like to run fast like Sonic?" Cream asked as the lights came up on the stage. "Or to have super cool hover shoes like Shadow? How about learning to use them and learning to do other cool things that everyone else can? Well, I'm Cream, a representative for Kaoru's Toyland and I'm here today that now you can!"
The camera panned out to show three boxes in front of Cream, one a great deal bigger than the other two. "It's time everyone was able to do all the cool things everyone else could do, and who better to start that revolution than Kaoru's Toyland? And to start off our episode," Cream threw open the lids of the two smaller boxes, "we have shoes!"
Cream placed both pairs of shoes on the ground in front of her then stacked the boxes off to the side. "Kaoru's Toyland will now be offering two different shoes to start your speedy little lives! Pair one is modeled for Sonic's running speed. You put these on, take a step to run, and they take control of your legs so you can run faster than you have ever run before. Don't worry though, they can read signals from your brain so they know when to stop... Or that you need to throw up."
She put the pair of shoes she was talking about next to the boxes off camera. "Pair two is modeled off of Shadow's hover shoes! You put these on and you can skate like the wind! And unlike the Sonic shoes, which take control of your legs so you can run, these shoes allow you to move your legs at a regular pace, but a single stride will take you farther than it normally would!"
"These particular shoes will be listed under Sonic and Shadow: Super Shoes! at Kaoru's Toyland and will cost 1,413,643,677 mermaid scales!"
Next, Cream walked over to the bigger box and opened it, pulling out a life-sized Emerl toy. "Now, I'm sure every once in a while you will start playing a video game or will watch am movie and think to yourself 'I wish I could fight like that!' Well, now you no longer have to wish with our brand new Emerl: Fighting Mentor! This Emerl toy has been trained to fight like every single action hero you could imagine, and not only that but he has perfected every one of those fighting styles. He has even created a few fighting styles of his own. But what does this have to do with you, you might ask. Well, we have sent this cuddly little toy to teaching school and now he can teach you every single one of these fighting styles.
"He's great! He's patient! And he'll even show you something as many times as you need it shown to you before you catch on. And with his hands on approach, he'll even fight you in various levels of difficulty until you have perfected whatever he is trying to teach you, helping you every step of the way. He'll show you how to use balance and logic to pick out the best moves for you! He's easily activated and easily deactivated, however he is a bit tough and will activate on his own if he thinks you have gone to long without practicing.
"And if all of that isn't enough to make you want to get up and buy these toys, let's show you some of our happy customers!"
"I did it! I did it!" A young boy yelled from the roof of a house. "I've finally caught my Sonic: Let's Play Tag! This is the happiest day of my life!"
The camera zoomed in on the boy, with the Sonic slightly behind him. "Tag," the Sonic said, poking the boy in the arm. "You're it."
The boy stopped cheering and frowned, looking around the yard. As he took a step to go after the Sonic, he zoomed off.
The camera switched to a skinny man fighting against Emerl. "I'll show him," the man said through clenched teeth. "He thinks women can't fight, eh? Then he's all condescending 'did they send me daughters when I asked for sons?' Psh. He'll never become general. He can't even tell I'm a woman and we're supposed to expect him to be able to have honed enough senses to lead us into war. I'll show him who's the better fighter. I'll 'make a man' out of him. Not only am I going to save my father's life, but I'm going to prove these sexist idiots are wrong.
"Um, help?" a small voice said from above the camera, which turned up to show a little girl hanging from the ceiling. "A got too close to a wall while skating, and I think the hover shoes are also grippy shoes, because now I'm stuck on the ceiling! The shoes think the ceiling is the floor!"
"Uh," the cameraman looked around him. "Do you know where a ladder is?"
"And that's all we have time for today!" Cream smiled into the camera. "This is just a friendly reminder to everyone that they should read all of the instructions and warnings. And I'd like to warn you all that we are not responsible for bruises, bumbs, disorientation, discombobulation, you getting pulled out of bed in the middle of the night to fight a crazy robot, or wind burn! Thank you and good night!"
A/N
Big Big Big Thanks to Poppy the Rabbit, my #1 super fan, for sending in the idea for the shoes and xiXlToxiclXix for sending in their request for an Emerl toy.
I can't thank everyone enough for sending in ideas for this story, which would've ended a long time ago if not for the outside help.
You guys are great and as soon as I finish all the ideas left that I want to do, the story will be over.
Til then, thank you guys for reading and I hope you won't be too lost without Kaoru and the gang. (Which I doubt you will considering the long spaces in-between updates)
Thanks for reading and DFTBA
