03
The world went white.
The light in his eyes was so bright he could see nothing else. He did not know where he was or if he was alone. There were small sounds all around but they were not human sounds. He was contained, but he did not know where or by what. It was small. He was small.
His head hurt. His eyes were full of light and his head was full of fire.
"Resign thyself," a voice said, booming and massive, greater than the world.
The world was full of light and he was full of fire.
"Resign thyself."
He was full of light and the world was full of fire.
"RESIGN THYSELF."
He was the light. He was the fire.
There was no world.
Fayt's eyes opened into darkness.
For a moment he lay shuddering on top of his blanket, feeling dirty, feeling clammy with sweat. Feeling afraid. He heard a foreign sound-not a human sound, a small mechanical click-and jerked upright suddenly. He gasped, and the air tasted cold and artificial. His mind scrambled, trying to discern where he was. He could see little, but in a muted green glow from the wall behind him he could see that he was not in his room, either at home or in the hotel.
The hotel.
It all came back suddenly-the day in the simulators, the walk with Sophia, the attack on Hyda and the nightmare run to the evacuation center. He looked down at his hands and was not as surprised as he had hoped to convince himself to be when they were not a child's hands, but his own, and badly torn. When he looked to Sophia, she was still asleep and there was still blood smeared near her mouth, now dry. When he looked to the wall behind him, the soft green glow proved to be from a clock set in the wall. 772.12, it read, 3:52. It was still so early, and he was still so tired, but he found that he could not even consider returning to sleep. His head hurt too much. He closed his eyes and pressed the balls of his hand to his temples, trying to still the deep, constant throb.
The sudden, equally pulsing buzz of an alert played over the facility speakers made him jump and cringe simultaneously. He groaned. "What now...?!"
On the other bed, Sophia first stirred, then then haltingly rose up on her elbow, rubbing her eyes. "Fayt?" Her voice was muzzy and slurred. "What's that sound?"
He stood and moved beside her. Where before his muscles had screamed in protest, now they were stiff and ached sullenly. "It sounds like they're going to make an announcement-"
As if in agreement, the buzzing was replaced by a brief, pleasant rising chime. When the sound of a woman's voice followed it over the speakers to announce an update for all refugees, it all but mocked the situation with its grating cheer.
"I repeat," the voice of the speakers said brightly, "this is an official announcement for all refugees. We now know that the recent raid on the resort planet Hyda was a surprise attack by Vendeen. Remote Station Seven mounted an attempt to defend Hyda IV, but it was thwarted by a tactical Vendeeni strike."
Fayt tilted his head up, brows furrowing slightly. The announcement, he thought, didn't make any sense. The attack had been by the Vendeen? At first the name was unfamiliar, but then he remembered-the Vendeen, like the Federation, were currently at war with Aldian. It was true that they had turned down the Federation's offers for aid on several occasions, if the news was to believed, but as far as he had heard there had never been any kind of hostilities between the two powers. So why would they have attacked here, a Federation planet far away from either the front or their own territory?
Beside him, Sophia's hand shifted, seeking his own. He took and it and gave it a faint squeeze as the voice over the speakers chirped onward.
"Currently, the Pangalactic Administration is scrambling ships from surrounding regions, but Vendeeni forces still have control of this sector. We request that all civilians begin boarding rescue shuttles for immediate evacuation to Remote Station Six. Please do not panic. Refer to the nearest console or attendant for further instructions."
Have a nice day, Fayt almost expected her to add, but she did not; the rising chime repeated, and with it the announcement began to play over again. He turned to face Sophia. "Come on, we've got to go-" He paused, looking her over again. "...You okay?"
"Yeah." She paused, then nodded once, more firm and sure than the word had been. "Yeah, I'm fine. A little sleep really helped calm me down."
"Okay. Hold on just a little longer. We'll be safe once we reach Remote Station Six."
"Okay." She nodded again. She believed him completely; he hoped it was true. Of course it was true. How could they not be safe there?
He shook his head and turned away, giving Sophia's hand one more light squeeze before releasing it. Stepping over to one of the consoles against the wall, he touched a hand to the screen to activate it. "Computer-" he paused. He had meant to ask for further instructions, as per the announcement, but the request stuck in his throat. "...Tell me the present location of Robert and Ryoko Leingod," he told it instead.
The computer answered immediately. "The present location of the specified individuals is unknown."
He felt his insides lurch, the cold feeling gripping him again. He reached forward and brought a hand down hard alongside the console, raising his voice without meaning to. "What do you mean, 'unknown'?"
"Fayt-"
He waved a hand to hush Sophia as the computer responded again, blandly, unmoved by his outburst. "Both Robert Leingod and Ryoko Leingod's positions were lost on Galactic Year 772-12141923."
"Lost? How could- Well what then?"
This time, the computer paused. Its answer, however, did not change. "The information system is currently experiencing technical difficulties. Confirmation is not possible at present."
"What?!" He brought his hand down on the metal again, hard, but it only made his hand hurt.
"The information system is currently experiencing technical difficulties. Confirmation is not possible at present."
"No-!"
"The information system is currently experiencing technical-"
"Stop!" He slammed his hand down again, harder, and then again. He leaned his weight forward onto it, his head coming down until it pressed against the cool metal wall above the console. He closed his eyes. Lost. What did that mean, 'lost'? Were they dead? Were they only missing? Had they be captured after all? 'Lost'. It could have meant anything, and for once-for the first time in his life-the computers could tell him nothing. He was alone in the dark, and there were no lights to guide him out of it. He would have to search blindly with his hands, but he did not know how, or where to begin.
Sophia's hand touched his back lightly. "Fayt...come on. We should go."
"Yeah," he said quietly. He squeezed his eyes shut a little more tightly, lifting his hands up and pressing the balls of them to his temples for a moment. The deep, slow throbbing in his head would simply not go away. "Yeah, I know."
"Are...are you okay, Fayt?"
"Yeah." He let his hands fall from his face and straightened up again, turning to Sophia and giving her a small smile. "I guess I'm just a little tired. I'll be fine once we're on the station and can get some real rest."
She looked him over slowly, then reached out and took his hand again. This time, it was Sophia who offered the small, comforting squeeze. "You do look pretty worn out. Let's hurry. The sooner we go the sooner we can rest, right?"
He blinked at her once, then smiled again. It came a little easier this time, and he reached out to brush at the tiny streak of blood by her mouth. It flaked away easily under his fingers and the skin was unbroken beneath it. He found that more reassuring than he knew how to express. "...Yeah. Come on, let's go."
Together, they re-emerged into the metal hallways. They were not alone there, as other evacuees were also weaving tiredly out of their rooms after being awakened by the grating voice of the official announcement. Many of them held on to each other, much as Fayt and Sophia did, some even leaning heavily against each other's shoulders. Here and there, a child was carried still sleeping in a parent's arms. That, too, was a reassuring sight. Maybe, Fayt thought, everything would be all right again after all. As long as parents still had the time to walk carefully and quietly so they would not awaken their children, things could not possibly be as bad as they seemed. There was a war going on, after all. Sometimes, bad things happened-but in the end, hadn't his life and those of every other civilian always just gone on the same? It was only this frightening, maybe, because he had never experienced it for himself before. For some people, for the soldiers now quietly and unhurriedly ushering the evacuees into the transport rooms and calmly reassuring them that there was plenty of room for everyone and not to worry, things like this were their daily work. If anything were really and truly wrong, they would not be so calm about it. It was all so reasonable now that he thought about it. And, of course the computer system could not find his parents right now. Hadn't he heard before that all scans and communications would be restricted? As soon as this was over, he would be able to find his parents. Everything would be okay.
Together with a large group, he and Sophia stepped up onto the transport pad. The light swirled around them and the cold nestled deep in his skull, throbbing slightly also in the gash across his palms. As the light dimmed, leaving them in a larger, brighter transport room than before, he decided that he would get them looked at on the ship.
"Welcome to the Federation transport ship GFSS 12372 Helre," a sharp young soldier was saying from the front of the room, near the transport door. He looked over the crowd of them sympathetically even as he gestured them to hurry off of the transport pad and make way for the next group. "You must have been through a lot. We will soon be departing for Remote Station Six. The observation bay is located direction through the corridor outside of this room, and we ask that you please proceed there and wait until we reach our destination. Our gravitic warp is fully operational, so you shouldn't have long to wait."
All around there were nods and murmurs of understanding, and together, almost moving as one, the weary crowd continued forward out of the room. Behind them, Fayt could hear the transporter activating again to receive more evacuees, but the sound was quickly cut off as the door to the transport room closed behind them.
The hall was not like the ones they had left behind in the evacuation center. Where they had been harsh and claustrophobic, the Helre's hall was wide and curving, both in its arc around the body of the ship and in its shape with a high, slightly rounded ceiling. The finish of the walls gave what would have been stark light a faintly glowing quality where it shone down from two tracks embedded in the ceiling between supporting arcs, and the outside wall was left open to the vast darkness of space beyond by a series of window panels. A solitary female soldier stood in position against the inner wall, and she nodded to the clump of people as they began to break up into smaller groups again, wandering down the hall as they had been instructed. Their footsteps seemed faintly muffled on the hard floors here as they had not been in the evacuation center.
Fayt did not immediately move forward, looking slowly around and taking it all in. He had never seen a Federation transport ship. It seemed surprisingly mundane.
"Please continue straight through to the observation deck, sir," the female soldier said at length. He blinked at her as well, then nodded and continued forward.
She's pretty, he found himself thinking as he passed her, even though it was really not the time or place for it. But her hair was short and wavy and she looked like a girl he often sat across from in his third period back at college, and it might have seemed even stranger, maybe, not to think about things like that at all. Further along the hall a woman was tugging at her son's arm as he plastered himself to one of the windows. She was telling him to stop that and come along while he was gushing about being on a Federation ship, a real live Federation ship, and all of it was so quiet and so normal, almost like something he could have seen on a street at home except for the vast black view beyond the window. Everything was going to be okay.
Some of the doors in the corridor seemed to locked, with small ID panels beside them sporting small red lights: bright reminders that the Helre was a military vessel with few areas safe to leave open for civilian access. He and Sophia passed the locked doors, instead continuing to the end of the curving hallway. The access light on the large door there was green, and it opened readily when they approached it.
Most of the evacuees in the observation bay were not using the flightport-style row seats that featured in much of the large room, but were instead gathered together near the interior wall. Some were staring fixedly at it, and some looking pointedly away from something there-probably some kind of monitor array or display screen, if the consoles jutting from the wall below it were any indication at all. Sophia tugged his hand. "Fayt, what's that? They're all watching something."
"Uh..." As they continued into the observation bay and the doors slid closed behind them, Fayt released Sophia's hand and took a few steps forward ahead of her. He tilted his head, squinting slightly to see the wall. He could not; only discerning shifts in its color or light as they reflected off the faces of the closest viewers. "Something on the monitor? I don't know-what is that?" Given their day so far, he doubted it was an in-flight movie.
Coming up behind him, Sophia pushed slightly against his back, urging him forward. "Well let's take a look and find out."
"Okay, okay." He shuffled forward, stepping up just enough that Sophia wouldn't have to push him any more-maybe as much because she shouldn't have to as because he didn't want to be pushed. But as they came up on the edges of the murmuring crowd, he stopped abruptly again. The changing light flashed over his face like those of the others as he turned his widening eyes up to it, unable to pull them away.
Everything is going to be okay.
The monitor displayed a view of space as well, with the vast curve of Hyda IV glowing green and blue between the white strips of clouds in its atmosphere. There, he could even see the great swirling funnel of the tropical storm that had been forecast for the next day making its way inexorably for the mainland. He had promised to take Sophia shopping when it struck, he remembered. Something that they could do together in out of the wind and rain. It seemed like so long ago. Above the planet itself, closer and brighter than the distant stars, small sudden flashes popped here and there, the source of the erratic light flickers on the faces of the evacuee viewers. They looked completely innocuous- flashbulbs bursting in the darkness of space-but Fayt knew perfectly well what they were, like everyone else watching. Sophia moved up beside him. He put a hand on her arm, but she had already seen. He felt her arm move up, maybe putting her hands over her mouth as she uttered a slightly muffled gasp. "Oh...oh, this is horrible-!"
The display screen was showing them the fight taking place for control of the Hyda system. The flashes were the individual ships in combat exploding.
They were everywhere.
The uneasy shuffle of the crowd watching the silent deathscape outside was broken in a startled jump as the speakers in the observation bay came to life with a dull chime. "We are about to enter gravitic warp to escape the battle zone," a man's voice told them in clipped tones. "I repeat: we are about to enter gravitic warp to escape the battle zone. All evacuees prepare for warp turbulence." And that was all. The 'click' of the speaker system turning off again was nearly audible in the uneasy silence that followed it. For a moment, no one moved.
The image on the display screen shifted, a cloudy haze obscuring the battle almost in tandem with the the first lurching of the ship, and suddenly the crowd came to life again. Fayt took hold of Sophia's elbow; her hands were still pressed over her mouth. "...Come on. Let's go sit down. We'll fall if we're still standing when we go into gravitic warp." She did not speak, but silently nodded and Fayt guided her gently to an open pair of seats while some still remained. She leaned against him, and he put an arm around her to hold her tightly as the ship lurched again, jerking the passengers-first small twitches, and then a great lunge. There were no restraints on the seat, and it was all that he could do to make sure she was safe. The observation bay had not been meant for occupation during warp flight. There were a few startled cries around the room as people were jarred from the seats and thrown to the floor.
Fayt closed his eyes as the room was flooded through the vast observatory windows with the flashing, shifting colored glow of warp space, but he could still see the light flicker through his eyelids. The feeling of the seat's vibrations beneath him translated even through the cushioning and could not tell if Sophia was shaking against him because of the rattling motion of the ship or something else entirely.
"Everything is going to be okay," he said softly, or thought he said. He wasn't really sure; he hoped that if he had spoken aloud that Sophia had heard him. The light flashing redly through his eyelids was strangely lulling and distracting, almost mesmerizing, like the flickering of a world full of fire.
When he opened his eyes again he realized that the quality of the light had changed from the bright, stringent flashes for an initial gravitic leap to the soft rhythmic pulsing of the deep warp path. His body still felt stiff and sore, but it was no longer rattled by the movements of the ship; it took him a moment, blinking unsteadily into the shifting brightness, to realize that he must have dozed off in his seat. He had no idea how long he had been asleep, but it was a more than reasonable assumption.
He shifted, rolling his shoulder in an attempt to work at least some of the stiffness out of it, and felt a weight begin to slide off of it as he did so. He turned his head to see Sophia lifting her head from where it had rest against him, also blinking the sleep from her eyes as she reached up to rub her face. The seam of his shirt had left a fine red line pressed into her cheek, and a few strands of light brown hair had stuck to the corner of her mouth. "Fayt...?"
"Sorry," he apologized, and meant it. She looked as if she needed the rest. "I didn't mean to wake you up."
"No, it's all right." She ran her hands over her face again, then gave him the brightest and most chipper smile she could probably muster under the circumstances-and, to her credit, it was a lot more than he'd expected of her. Looking at Sophia, he could almost imagine nothing was wrong at all. She bumped her arm against his slightly. "See?"
"Yeah." He smiled back, and for a moment they just sat like that with the soft pulses of the light from outside the observation bay's windows washing over them. Eventually their gazes drifted outside the bay window instead.
"So...Where do you think we are now?" she asked at last.
Fayt, though, could only shake his head and look around. "I wonder? There haven't been any announcements yet." Or at least, so he assumed. For some reason he didn't want to admit that he had also fallen asleep. It did seem though as if an announcement would have awakened one or both of them.
Another long silence stretched between them as Sophia looked around, rocking slightly back and forth on her seat. She must have been restless, probably nervous. Just as he was about to suggest they get up and walk around, she beat him to it with an even better idea. "We should go ask one of the crew." She smiled at him hopefully, or maybe expectantly, and for a moment he could just blink at her. In the middle of everything, wrapped up in trying to protect her, Fayt had almost forgotten that Sophia was the brilliant one, the one with initiative and drive when it came to reality instead of games. Now that things had settled down to the mundane every day mechanics of relocation instead of fighting for escape in the packed halls of the evacuation system, it made sense that she would be the one to take charge once more.
"...Fayt?"
"Huh? Oh..." He blinked, and shook his head. He must have been staring at her. Putting his hands on his knees, he quickly pushed himself up to his feet. "Yeah. Good idea."
She stood up beside him and put her hand on his arm, just for a moment. She didn't say anything, but he knew what the action meant: 'everything will be okay'. He smiled back at her, and together they walked up the steps from the smaller viewing wing in which they had found their pair of empty seats and back up into the main body of the observation bay. By now, the crowd had long since dispersed, and the wall monitor displayed nothing but a holding screen with the ship's name and designation beneath the Federation insignia. Only a single Tetragene man remained near the monitors, pacing back and forth along their length muttering passionately to himself as he went. The small translator Fayt wore picked the words up and fed them back in terran at a slight delay-words about vengeance, punishment, reparations for the death of innocence that made his hands twitch and left a faint disconcerting warmth behind his eyes. Though some of the other evacuees milled about the room, some solitary and some huddled and murmuring among friends in speculation of how long this would last, most seemed to be doing the same thing that Fayt and Sophia had done and slept as well as they could in the stiff-backed chairs. Everyone looked tired and worn.
There did not, however, appear to be any members of the Helre's crew in the observation bay with them. Fayt frowned. They had been told to wait in the observation bay...but at the same time, he didn't see any harm in going out just to ask. Sophia took the decision out of his hands by pulling him along towards the door, and then through it back into the soft glow of the hallway.
As it turned out, he should not have worried.
"Fayt! Sophia!"
It was Peppita, who bounced and jangled up to the two of them, rocking to a stop on her toes. She was not alone in the halls, and both the wrinkled old man and the woman in the red dress stood nearby. Neither of them were smiling, instead looking out the clear outer walls to the subtly colored pulses of light beyond. Even Peppita's face looked drawn. Of the rest of the circus troupe there was no sign.
"Hey...where is everyone?" Fayt asked, only to have Sophia follow immediately on its heels:
"And are you all right?"
The little girl blinked up at the two of them for a moment, then smiled. Someone had taken the time to put her hair back up again. "Oh gosh, you don't have to worry about me. Everyone else is sleeping, or in the medical room. And Gonella's right down the hall. It was just pretty scary, you know?"
Fayt nodded a bit, as did Sophia beside him. They did know. They most certainly did. "Well, we're glad you're okay." He hoped that she had not seen the space battle on the view screens, though. That, he thought, might have been a little much for a child. He shook his head to clear it of the thought and looked out the windows again. "...It's beautiful out there, isn't it. Were you watching the warp stream?"
Instead of immediately answering, Peppita went quiet. Fayt looked away from the window back to her, and saw that she had turned her eyes towards the ground. After a moment, she took a step back towards the old man and young woman she had left behind.
"...Peppita?"
"I saw Hyda just before the ship entered gravitic warp," she said with uncharacteristic quiet. "It was...all covered in red. And for a second I actually thought it was really pretty, but then I... I realized it-"
"Oh, Peppita-" Sophia reached out to her, but the little girl just shook her head. When she looked back up at them, her eyes were dry but afraid.
"It's like my mama said. It wasn't a dream or anything-it was all real. How many people... how many dreams died in those flickering lights?"
Sophia said nothing. Fayt had no answer either. Peppita reached up and took the hand Sophia had offered to her, holding it tightly for just one moment as her smile came back to life on her face. "I'm really glad I saw you guys again. It makes me happy."
And then she was gone again. She slipped loose and jangled and clattered away down the hall, leaving them behind. Neither of them said anything but Fayt felt Sophia squeeze his hand a bit and squeezed back in return. They began to walk down the hall again a little more slowly than before. When they rounded the subtle bend of the hallway Gonella, the clown, came into view just as Peppita had said he would. He was entertaining a small child by loudly describing and acting out the many silly measures he would take in interrogating the Vendeen and making them all apologize, every one, for three days and three nights straight. The child's mother stood nearby with a tight smile on her face. For a moment, Fayt was happy to just stand there and watch them. Sophia did not tug him along, so he thought she must have been too.
Across the hall, on the side that led into the deeper parts of the ship, the security light beside one door blinked from red to green before sliding open. Noise spilled out into the hall as it did so.
"Hey-hey! Get your hands off of me!" Fayt looked on in surprise as a heavyset man in a green shirt and vacation shorts, less one sandal, was gently but firmly pushed back out into the hall by a young officer of the Helre's crew. The officer was tall and skinny, with glasses. He looked like the kind of man who would have been blown over by a stiff breeze, but he seemed to be removing the offending civilian easily, with only one hand on the man's chest pushing him back. "What are you trying to pull? First you let the Vendeeni get away with this while you're napping on the job and now you manhandle me?! Do you have any idea who I am?!"
"I'm sorry, sir." The officer sounded calm and tired. "But this incident is currently under investigation. We have no further comments at this time-"
"-You're trying to silence the public! I'll-"
"-and you are attempting to access a restricted area-"
"-Don't you play games with me!" The man's voice rose higher, shouting now to drown out the softer voice of the young officer. He reached up and shoved back, taking a step away and out into the hall, then pointed accusingly at the young man. "Don't you play games with me, and don't you waste my time! Get me the captain, damnit! I want to talk to the captain!"
The officer seemed unfazed. "I'm afraid I can't do that. As long as the captain is the commanding officer on this ship, his orders are absolute. My current orders from the captain are not to let any civilian enter any area outside of the lounge, medical facilities, and viewing bay for any reason. This is to prevent complications and interference with the ship's normal functions, and our ability to bring you all to safety." He nodded once, curtly. "As a military ship we may be lacking in the amenities you are used to, but with your cooperation this trip can still go smoothly and quickly for all involved. Good day, sir."
"What-hey!" The officer had closed the door behind him, and the security light went red as he did so. The man in green pounded on the closed hydraulic doors. "You...you blithering idiot!" he howled. "I'll remember you! I'll use my influence to get you canned the second we get to Remote Station Six! You'll regret this!"
The man quieted after a moment, breathing heavily. When he turned to face the hallway, his lined face was blotchy with red and the thinning hair combed over his fading hairline was stuck to his scalp in dark strings by sweat. He glowered around, and Fayt realized without surprise that they were all staring at him and his outburst-him, Sophia, the woman, the clown, and the child. The man also seemed to realize this, and his lips pulled off his teeth for a moment. "What are you all looking at? Get out of my sight!" He turned without waiting for a response, if indeed there were to be one, and stalked away on his own.
It was only a few moments before the silence broke again. The little boy reached out to tug on Gonella's puffy green pant leg asking "And then what would you do?", and that was that. There might have been an odd tension in the air, but it broke with that. The clown resumed his posturing, the mother wore her tense smile of relief again, and life went on. It was strange but also wonderful that it reminded Fayt it would be the same with all of this. Life would go on. He and Sophia glanced at each other.
"...Maybe we should just go back to the observation deck and wait after all," he suggested. She sighed a little and glanced off to one side, looking out the windows. She did not have to say that she did not want to simply sit around and wait, he could tell. Part of it was that he knew her-this was Sophia, the one who always wanted to know and understand. Now that she had rested and safety on their arrival at the Federation Station was a foregone conclusion, now that there was no longer any danger, the inquisitive scholar in her had awakened from its vacation-induced slumber and was hungry for answers. He nudged her arm slightly with his. "Hey, Sophia."
"Yeah," she agreed halfheartedly. When he nudged her again though she turned a faint smile on him, and nodded. "...Yeah, you're right. Wherever we are now, we must be close anyway. We'll probably be there already by the time we find someone to ask."
He smiled back at her. "Probably."
As the door to the lounge opened, the ship lurched slightly, making them stumble against each other-except that it wasn't really a lurch so much as an odd, floating stutter. The sensation was almost one of being in an elevator, and Fayt almost laughed at the idea of so archaic a device being associated to the great ship. He helped Sophia stand straight again and thought no more of it. "Come on, let's sit down."
"Good idea. If a little turbulence like that..." She trailed off, then stopped completely as they stepped into the room. She looked around, blinking slightly, and her brow slowly furrowed. "...Fayt?"
"Yeah?" He looked down to her in concern, wondering for a moment if she might not still need some rest. Or what if she actually had hurt herself earlier-if she had hit her head, or something like that? "What's wrong? Are you okay?"
She shook her head slightly and lifted a hand, pointing past him. "Fayt, look. The light-"
He turned his head to follow the line of her finger, looking down to the wide open viewing platforms and the space beyond, but could not tell what had troubled her so. There was nothing wrong. The black expanse of space was clear, the stars glittered in the distance. Closer but still far away, a bright blue planet and its small, ruddy moon glowed softly against the darkness. It could not have looked more serene if someone had engineered it to do so.
It took him a moment to realize that this was exactly the problem. The light-the soft pulsing sheet of colored light that had enveloped the ship as it moved through gravitic warp-was gone. The ship had returned to normal space. He frowned slightly. "Maybe we're there?"
"I don't see it," she said. He felt her shake her head, and then she let go of him, moving forward and hurrying down the steps with her broken sandal flapping against her foot. Somehow, they had forgotten to fix it like somehow he had forgotten to have his hands seen to. He didn't know why they occurred to him now; her sandal simply reminded him. He watched her for a moment as she put her hands on the guard rail and leaned forward towards the clear wall. It looked like there was nothing there at all and she was simply leaning out into space with her head framed by the brilliant blue planet beyond like an off-center halo. He joined her a little more slowly than she had hustled down the steps, as others around them also began to notice the fall from warp space. "I don't see any sign of a Federation Station. I think we're in the middle of nowhere."
"That doesn't make any sense. Why would we leave warp?" Still, when he stood beside her and looked outside, he had to agree. There was no sign of anything except the blue planet.
"Wait," someone else said, and a hand stretched out to point into the darkness. "I see something, there!"
Everyone looked, of course. "...Is that a ship?" Someone ventured hopefully. "Maybe there was trouble with the creation engine and they're here to pick us up."
Fayt shook his head. There were two of them, and these were not the sleek, tiered ships of the Federation. They were great and solid and dull, deep red. His first thought was that he had seen them before, on the computer's live feed. His second, more chilling, was that these must be what Vendeeni warships looked like. Could the Helre's shields hold up if they opened fire? His mind scrambled, trying to find a reassurance. Supposedly, or so he thought he remembered hearing, Vendeeni technology was based on spacetime manipulation. Yes, he was sure Sophia had said something about it. It wasn't his field and he hadn't really paid much attention.
Not very reassuring. Not very reassuring at all.
Sophia let go of the rail and moved closer beside him. She must have recognized them from the video feed as well. "Fayt-"
She was cut off by the sound of the intercom coming alive with a grim voice. They turned towards it, looking upward instinctively. "This is the captain speaking." Fayt found himself dully unsurprised as the already worn refugees began to buzz and fuss. Soon, he knew, a new panic would begin. "We are currently under attack by a number of Vendeeni battleships. Our gravitic warp engine has already been disabled, which means that escape is not an option. All power has been diverted to our shields to buy us some time, but I wanted you all to know: our chances are slim." There was a murmur. Someone let out a low, eerie moan. Fayt put an arm around Sophia and watched as the evacuees began first to shift, and then to roil uneasily as the captain's voice went on. "I had hoped to transport you all the way to Remote Station Six, but it seems that is now beyond my power. All evacuees are requested to proceed to the ship's escape pods."
The ship lurched suddenly with a massive rumble. People cried out, stumbling against seats or walls or each other. The captain's voice continued even on above the noise. "Please remain calm and follow the instructions of the attendant nearest you as you board your pod." For a moment he was silent, and then, "...Good luck to you all."
Fayt glanced down at Sophia. She opened her mouth to say something, but then the ship lurched again, an a bright flash of light burst behind them. Sophia was jarred from his arm and stumbled forward with a faint cry, but did not quite fall. They both turned to the window, knowing what had happened. "A direct hit," Fayt found himself gasping. Even now, more lances of glaring reddish energy were hammering the ship, leaving lightbursts and the hex-matrix of the shields briefly visible wherever they struck. The observation bay was in an uproar as some ran to seek the pods and others simply ran, like a small dolphin-faced humanoid still clad in a torn wetsuit, in panicked circles. Someone moaned that they were doomed.
It was into this scene that a member of the crew entered the viewing bay, careful as he ran in not to crash into any of those fleeing out of it. Over the chaos, Fayt thought he heard the man say that the hangar bay—and in it, the escape pods—were located a level up. He also heard him say not to panic, but it was too late for that, and Fayt had already seen such warnings go to waste today. Yesterday? It seemed so long and had happened so fast. He grabbed Sophia's hand again. One of their palms was sweating; he could feel it burning in his cuts. "We gotta go." He heard her gasp an affirmative. One of them pulled the other forward, but whether he was leading her or the other way around was no longer clear. Once they reached the crowd pushing to get through the narrow observation bay door, they were carried along regardless.
After today, Fayt vowed, he would never use another automated walkway again.
In the hall people scattered again, fleeing the congestion in the doorway. Federation soldiers stood along the walls, ushering them along, urging them to stay calm, promising that there were enough escape pods for everyone. The ship's lurching became almost rhythmic under the Vendeeni bombardment. It jerked and shuddered like a thing alive, knocking its passengers about in its throes. They bounced off of the walls and each other wildly.
Out of the corner of his eye Fayt saw a flash of pink by the long windows, stationary and glaring against the red flashes of Vendeeni weapon flashes and the black of space beyond. Without thinking about it he stopped, digging his heels in against the hard floor as best he could when someone slammed into his back in their hurry. Sophia continued forward for a moment only to be pulled up short by their joined hands. He felt her turn at the other end of his arm, looking back at him and probably wondering why he had stopped, but he did not see it because he was not looking at her. He backed up, pulling her along with him and pushing against the flow of people.
"Peppita, what are you doing?" He had been right—it was her. The little girl, as well as the rest of the circus troupe, were tucked into the alcove provided by two supporting arcs, quietly watching the rest of the evacuees hurry past to the escape pods. They rocked slightly with the heaving of the embattled ship as if used to the rigors of the war zone. When Fayt and Sophia emerged near them, she simply blinked up at him. Her mild expression was somehow frustrating. "Come on, why aren't you headed for the escape pods?!"
"Oh," she said, simply, as if it were the silliest question he could have asked. "We're getting on last."
Sophia squeezed his hand a little. She pulled slightly as well, maybe to remind him that they too should be running, but it was only a very little pull. "Peppita, it doesn't matter who goes first or last. There are enough for everyone-"
Beside Peppita, the small and wrinkled old man Fayt recognized from the shelter put an arm around the small girl's shoulder. When he spoke he did so quietly but firmly, but his voice still carried easily enough that Fayt did not have to strain himself to hear it over the rumbling and shouting. "Please don't think we're being careless or leisurely, but panicking is no better." He blinked up at the two of them. "I've simply decided that we will go last."
"And I've decided to stay with my family. I don't want to be separated from them no matter what." Peppita nodded once, firmly, then suddenly froze. Her tiny hands came up and clapped over her mouth. "Oh, I-I'm so-"
Fayt shook his head quickly. "I understand. Be careful."
"Silly." She lowered her hands slowly, revealing a sheepish smile. "We're the Rossettis. We'll be fine. You guys get out of here!" As if to emphasize her words the ship gave another shuddering heave. The floor seemed to jump beneath their feet. The people in the hall around them screamed and cried out. Peppita let go of the old man beside her and ran forward, putting one hand on Fayt's stomach and one on Sophia's beside him, and pushed. "Go on! We'll see each other again, okay?"
Fayt hesitated. Sophia squeezed his hand again, then let go of him and knelt down to give Peppita a brief, tight hug. "Of course we will. We still have to see your big debut!" Peppita said nothing, only made a small sound and hugged her back. "All of you, take care of each other."
Fayt stood back, feeling slightly awkward as the two girls released each other. Peppita moved back to the old man's side, and Sophia took his hand again. He found that he could do little more than nod to the circus troupe, who smiled and waved to the passing evacuees as if to reassure them that everything would be okay. There was something almost funerary in the quiet of their cheer and he thought, suddenly, that they might not see them again at all. But all he could really do was nod. "...Be careful."
They stepped back, and were pulled into the hall again. Somewhere the stream of people turned, bouncing and bashing off of the walls with the ship's steadily more violent shaking, and moved onto a stairwell. It was open in the center and people were forced to grip the smooth rails fanatically or be pitched over the edges to fall into the deeps of the ship. Another soldier pressed against one corner firmly directed them upwards:
"Once on the upper deck, turn right and proceed all the way to the back! I repeat—on the upper deck, turn right..."
They fumbled past. A child was crying. When they stumbled out onto it at last after what felt like an eternity on the narrow stairwell, the upper deck hallway was identical to the one that they had left behind, and outside the long windows Fayt could see the shield flickering more and more weakly under the rain of fire. From somewhere deep in the ship, a crackling, grinding noise began to stir. It vibrated beneath their feet against the steady hammering from outside, only adding to the cacophony of motion. Federation soldiers to either side ushered them down the hall, urging them to form an orderly line. It formed up quickly but just as quickly dissolved into a roiling mob when it butted against the doors of the hangar bay.
They were closed. Three Federation Soldiers also stood in front of them, the man in the center with his arms outspread in a further, final bar. Sophia slowed down, but Fayt turned his shoulder towards the door, lowering it slightly as he pushed his way through the milling, frightened people. It seemed strange, but though he might have felt rude doing the same thing only days before he almost did not even think about it after the initial evacuation. After beating people aside with a broken pipe, he supposed, a little shouldering aside was positively refined. Thinking about it that way gave him a chill.
"Please, no no no, please just let me out," someone pleaded. "I don't even need a pod. Just let me out and I'll go for a swim, really..."
The dolphin-faced humanoid. Beside him the Tetragene man who had earlier hissed and muttered of vengeance raised his hands and shoved one of the young soldiers. The man looked strong, but they did not so much as budge under the pressure. "I thought we were being saved, and now this?"
The child kept on crying. Fayt could understand why people were lashing out or becoming hysterical—not just the fear, but tiredness, a tiredness that could not be solved by sleeping in the shelter cots or on the hard seats of the observation bay; a tiredness of running and uncertainty and tight claustrophobic halls that stank of fear and roared or rumbled all around. He reached forward between two people and tried to press through, looking imploringly to one of the soldiers standing guard. "Hey—hey. What's going on?"
None of them looked at him. The one on the right—another pretty girl; why did it seem like only pretty girls joined the Federation military, as if the games and movies had finally gotten something right about the way the world worked—simply continued to gently but firmly press back those who tried to push through to the doors before their turn. "Please do not panic, and return to your place in the line. There are more than enough escape pods for everyone-"
"I heard this ship was over occupancy because of the rescue operation!" Someone shouted. Fayt turned, looking for them. He was startled to see the balding man from before; the one who had demanded to speak to the captain. "I heard you don't actually have enough at all!"
The crowd groaned and lurched forward as one, so that the three soldiers were forced to take a step back closer to the doors. Still, they did not let fear or uncertainty break their stern expressions. The female soldier continued unfazed. "Priority will be given to the elderly, women and children, but I repeat, there are more than enough escape pods for everyone."
"Everyone will have a turn." The soldier in the center picked up where his compatriot had left off. "We are currently waiting for the previous group to finish departure so we may load the next set of pods. It will only be a little longer."
The doors behind them opened even as the grinding sound below rose to a chattering roar—he heard the heavy plates rattle as they pulled back into the wall on their hydraulics. Another female soldier emerged. "Attention, everyone! I need you all to move quickly forward through the escape hatch and out of the way. Once you enter each room, a ladder will lead you down into the individual pods. The computer will take control once you are inside-"
Fayt did not hear her finish. The shaking was too much, the sound of the ship shuddering itself apart (what a horrible thought, but the way it sounded, the way it felt, how could it be anything else?), the flashes of light outside, it was all too much. Something unspoken hung in the air and said that there was no time. The crowd did not resume their line but surged forward, pushing the Federation soldiers with them, and when the door tried to close behind them it jammed halfway with a blasting hiss of air and a hideous rattle. People scattered, scrambling for the hangar doors. Taking Sophia's hand, Fayt pushed forward past them all.
"F-Fayt?!" Sophia yelped, stumbling as she tried to keep up with him. "Where are you going? The pods are-"
He shook his head. "Everyone's fighting over these ones. There should be more in the next room." He did not think about what would happen if the large door leading to the second hangar had also jammed while shut. He did not think about what would happen if all of the pods in the back had been fired already by the earlier evacuees. He thought about the feeling of Sophia's sweat burning in his cut palm. He thought about what his father had told him, that he had to protect her. He thought about the Rossettis and prayed that there really were enough escape pods after all.
When they approached the door in the back it did not open and he felt a hot spike of panic rise up inside of him, but Fayt did not slow. He pulled to the side instead, first pressing the emergency open console beside it and then, when it did not respond, closing his hand into a first and slamming it down on it. Pain flared up through his hand, shooting into his arm, but the door clunked noisily open. Air gushed out of the walls around the panels, hot and heady with a strange machine stink. He could not imagine a way that it could have been a good smell, and rushed through, tugging Sophia along behind him again. There was no one in this back hall—yet. It was certain that someone would notice soon and follow. Knowing that, Fayt ducked into the first door he could get to open. Some were too badly jammed.
Inside the small, narrow room, Fayt released Sophia's hand. He heard her fall back a few steps behind him as he hurried forward and crouched down by the metal ladder descending through a hole in the floor. A cursory glance revealed the soft lights of an escape pod's tiny one-person cabin below. He heaved a short, massive sigh. "Good, the pod's still here." He looked up to Sophia, and rest one hand on the edge of the hole. "Get in, quick. I think we're running outta time."
But Sophia did not climb in as he told her. She took one step forward and then balked, shaking her head. "Fayt...I-I'm scared."
"Don't be." He realized it was an absurd thing to say and straightened, standing in front of her. He reached out and took her arms briefly, giving a faint squeeze. "I mean it. Don't worry."
"But-"
"A Federation ship will pick our pods up in no time. We'll see each other at Remote Station Six. I promise." He let go, but not before turning her towards the open hatch and nudging her forward. "Now come on, get in. Let's go."
Still she balked-maddeningly, infuriatingly, and the urge to simply shove her inside was as tempting as it was sudden and horrible. She looked back at him over her shoulder with wide eyes on the verge of tears. There was a still a tiny crease in her cheek from where she had slept on his shoulder. He wanted more than almost anything to reach up to her face and smooth it for her. "You'll follow, right?"
"Yeah."
"Promise?"
"Right behind you. I promise!" Just please, just please get in the damn pod. He heard something that sounded like rending metal. He knew it only from the horrible escape in the evacuation tunnels and Sophia opened her mouth and somehow, for some reason, he felt a horrible wave wash over him, like the strange despair he had felt looking at her in the combat simulator now so much less out of place. Before she could say anything, he turned her again and pulled her close, into a tight hug. Her face pressed into his chest and he could feel her shaking everywhere. He had not been able to see it. Maybe it was only the ship. Maybe she was not shaking at all. Maybe it was only him. "I promise."
She held him briefly, just as tightly, and then they released each other. No more words were exchanged. They took a long look at each other's faces, and then she was gone down the ladder. He watched her mousy brown hair bob as she descended and stood over the hole until the pod hatch closed over it, shutting her off from view.
He could not silence the part of him that thought it might be for the last time.
Fayt knew that he must have been dazed, because he did not even realize that he had left the room and re-entered the hallway until he felt someone take his shoulders in a firm grip and give him one hard, firm shake.
"Hey! Hey, you, are you all right?!"
Fayt shook his head, then nodded. He blinked muzzily up at the taller man who had taken hold of him and finally registered him as another Federation soldier. Well, of course. All of the civilians were being evacuated first. The man nodded in return, releasing him and pointing him towards the end of the hall. "This way, quickly! There's still pods left here."
"Right!" Fayt's stupor broke, and he ran down the hall past the man. Someone had lodged the last door open with a mechanic's pry bar. Under other circumstances it would have been a laughably primitive solution. Now, he squeezed through the narrow opening, losing a sandal in the process, and hurried lopsidedly towards the hole in the floor of this last room. His hands slipped on the ladder and he fell into the escape pod instead. It hurt, but he had to admit it was faster. He heard the hatch slam closed above him and scrambled into the single seat, fumbling with the controls as he felt the pod slide forward to the launch position from its holding bay.
A mindless flurry of beeps later, he heard the blandly pleasant computer voice chime up. "Activation complete. Ejection in ten seconds." The viewing screen in front of him showed the airlocks ahead opening into a long tunnel, one after the other, until the gleaming white hall opened finally into the huge and trackless black beyond. Only moments after the final one opened, he heard the rush of the small engines and his pod shot forward. Almost before he could blink, he was outside and clearing the ship. The long blue contrails of the other pods punctuated the battlefield all around him, streaming away from the ship even as the red lines of Vendeeni fire shot towards it between them.
Suddenly a huge flare popped behind him, brightening space for a single moment before blinking out again. The escape pod lurched and rumbled, shaking and tumbling wildly. Fayt slid in his seat, reached for the safety harness. He could not fit it into place and so simply clung to it for dear life in the face of the terrible unknown turbulence. He did not ask the computer what it had been. He did not want to know. He closed his eyes, and pretended that he did not.
When he opened them again, his viewscreen was wild with static and the pod was careening straight into the great red mass of a Vendeeni warship. He heard a huge shrilling sound and realized that it was the sound of his own screaming in the confined space. "Computer, redirect! REDIRECT!"
The computer screeched and burred with static in response. The pod continued forward. The Vendeeni ship seemed too massive to be real, too huge for even space to contain. Space seemed, between the bursts of static destroying his vision to the world beyond, to be tearing apart. It sparked and suddenly wrenched open. Where there was nothing, suddenly, he saw blue light. It burned his eyes and he almost looked away, except that he could not. Something came out of space, out of the vast tear, spitting light and thunder, all in eerie silence. The static cleared for one pristine moment and he realized that it was another ship. The Vendeeni ship pulled laboriously upward, trying not to strike it; the two behemoths drifting apart like great whales in a starry sea. Fayt's pod shot between them so closely he could almost feel their weight around it.
He sat rigidly in his seat, shaking for a moment, cold and clammy with sweat, and then turned to look behind himself. He could not see anything, of course—nothing but the inside of the pod. The light turned soft all around him, a calm pastel, as the tiny vessel darted into warp space. Fayt slowly settled back into his seat.
For now, there was nothing to see.
