The characters are created by LM Montgomery, and are her property... the original characters & storyline are unique to this story are copyright 2021, by Nell Lime.

Author's Notes:

TLWtwl - Yes! He's still rather confused a bit, but that makes him fun :D

- oh Yes Davy is nosy, too curious and downright rude, which makes him interesting I think, but yes for causing problems makes him fun to hate at times:)

— Anne —

Wednesday, June 23d, 12:45am

Apple Bough, Avonlea, PEI

I woke to Gilbert's alarm clock fifteen minutes before my night shift began for watching Gilbert. Mr, Blythe was downstairs now, And the house was quiet. I didn't bother to dress, instead grabbing the dressing robe that I'd assumed to have been Gilberts some years before, likely during our school teaching days. My own was still waiting to be delivered the next week in my second trunk. Marilla had sent over my older one I'd left behind, only I'd left it in the trunk. I'd unpacked that afternoon some, finding it odd to hang my dresses beside Gilbert's older suits in the wardrobe. To see some of my own things scattered about with his. That made me gulp. We may not be engaged, but I realized we were as good as engaged and I'd have to break off the supposed engagement and leave for parts unknown no doubt when he recovered.

But then… I'd remembered his fevered delusions, and our kiss, and... I couldn't even let myself think of the rest of that encounter, thankfully he would have no knowledge of it. Perhaps, well, I doubt he'd mind waking up to learn we were engaged. And if for my romantic sensibilities I would insist that he woo me and ask properly in a way that would be full of romance. And we'd have time. Three years before he could marry and support a wife. Glancing at my red hair in the mirror over the vanity from the single candle as I performed my toiletries. To think Gilbert Blythe had a romantic bone in his body. I thrilled at it. Though, truthfully we were better off as friends. I couldn't bare…

So I slipped down, said goodnight to Mr. Blythe after assisting him to change and clean Gilbert, gladly letting him handle the more intimate regions. I'd babbled on as we'd cleaned Gilbert industrially about how proud I was of Gilbert winning the Cooper, to which Mr. Blythe just smiled. We'd had two cats as witness for our work, who both stayed as Mr. Blythe quietly went upstairs to rest.

So I'd sat and tended Gilbert in the night hours. Sitting on the chair beside him for the first hour, then as I'd done the day before sitting behind him to prop him up and help him drink, half sitting on the bed, as he leaned into me to sit up. I'd stayed half sitting on the bed, tending him. My thoughts flowing.

In the dark though, my mind went back to that first night of the two of us alone. The morning I'd woken up to. Blaring in my memory as black and white. Even my dreams and what they meant. The consequences of it, I wouldn't think of. At least none knew, and I'd only dare tell Gilbert if… Well, if I really was to become Mrs. Dr. Gilbert Blythe. I actually sighed at the thought. They said you could tell when a woman was no longer a maiden, and I'm afraid when Mrs. Lynde had lectured me about it, I'd been dreaming instead about a glade surrounded by birches I'd stumbled upon and the merry whistles it'd made in the wind that I'd paid little thought. Gilbert's Aunt Mary Maria had known. Oh it was the depths of dispair. I'd heard rumors about the pain the first time, Diana had written that she'd been sore for three days after and had to take a bath even though it wasn't Saturday night to sooth the soreness. Though she did confirm it got better. But how? A teething baby could not cause as much pain!

Perhaps I could ask, but who? Marilla was out of the question. And certainly not Mrs. Lynde! She must never know, for I'd never hear the end of it. Mrs. Blythe, if she knew I and her son had… I gulped. I found myself holding his hand, rubbing it in my worry. I wiped some of his sweat from his upper chest and forehead and leaned back again to think more. Diana? But she'd just tell Fred, and though my bosom friend, I dared not. I… I didn't want Gilbert to know I was so wanton that I'd seduced him, for I gulped. I had, remembering the dream. I'd initiated it. And then when I'd come to my senses, I'd begged him to stop. But he'd continued perhaps I could write to Phil. I could confess to her, soon as I had her address. She was the only one who knew the particulars of my refusal of Gilbert's proposal two years before, and Roy. She'd understand.

But what if another intercepted the letter? To put in writing not meshed in metaphors what we'd done? For Phil would write back and demand details, clarification. No, best to speak to Diana when I could. Even if it meant swearing her to secrecy even from Fred and if she did I'd never speak to her again. That confession should never see the light of day or paper!

So I sat there, in silence, holding his hand watching for the clock to strike that it would be time to rouse him to feed him and help him drink. My mind was a whirl though as I prayed silently, for his life, and for forgiveness, for what we'd done. I think each moment I'd think on it, the ramifications would grow as I'd realize of what we'd done. Thankfully I'd never lied saying I was his wife, only lie of omission never correcting his feverish ramblings they'd taken for fact, fearful of his loss. I groaned. Thankfully none would know, it was just an obscure hotel where few ventured.

And then... that first night. Our actions in the bed, the words of the Song of Songs that us girls had hilariously read through the night before teasing Phil of her wedding night had taken a whole new meaning for our actions. I would likely never marry now, not if I had to explain to a husband. Was I even a maiden anymore? The Bible referred to it as Adam knew Eve. I didn't think I was, not if the pain Diana had hinted at was any clue. I'd remembered one time freshman year I'd snuck a peek when we'd been studying and Gilbert had gone into the other room in his anatomy book. The book was upstairs, I could have sworn I'd seen it on his desk, forgotten. I'd find it later.

I prayed, worried, prayed.

I could not put us in that position again though I realized, thinking of the first night I'd comforted him. That had been what had lead us down the road to destruction. So when he began to toss and turn from another nightmare, and would not stir from it when I reached out to stroke his forehead or arm. I slapped him with the wet cloth I used to cool him. "Gilbert! Wake up…"

"Anne…" He tried to pull me towards him, his lips aiming for mine, but I pushed him away.

We couldn't. Not only must I protect him from my wantonness and his own, but also the Typhoid. "Shh… Gilbert go back to sleep." I pushed him back down. "I said I'd stay until the end, but I didn't say I'd let you kiss me."

I was relieved by Davy at sunrise, and slept much of the morning before rising again, and taking breakfast. I had been placed in charge of seeing to Gilbert's vitals every six hours. A fact that thankfully I had the company of the Blythes often when doing so. To have to listen to his intestines was mortifying in itself with the tube loaned to us by Dr. Spenser, but to also feel for swelling daily. Quite mortifying in a way. For I I would remember that time in the hotel, and would feel shame, mingled with intense flushing when I would need to examine and check. At least he would rarely wake then, for he slept more and more.

I'd a moment when I'd gone upstairs to refresh myself mid morning, to nap as Mrs. Blythe had insisted stating she'd sit alone with her son and would call one of the men to help if he needed something. I'd gone up, sorted through the abandoned older books, finding the anatomy book, I leafed through. Gray's Anatomy: Descriptive and Applied it said on the cover. I skimmed through the index, then spent the time I was supposed to be sleeping. Though it was rather in depth on every organ, and what they were made of, it gave no info for the marriage bed, or the process. I groaned when I'd finished, and though I now could understand better the process of what I was to check for Gilbert's innards, it gave no insights. Diana had hinted at pain, and I'd certainly felt it, I mean my chest had hurt for over a day afterwards. I tried to scrap through my mind of any rumors I'd heard of the marriage bed. But then worry for his life came, and I pushed all worry of that away. I knew enough anyways.

He'd dream though and wake sometimes to reality but often not. He'd dream of the past, and the unknown. The only constant was I was in those dreams it seemed. We settled into a routine those days. We'd have a few visitors through the day, though most stayed away out of respect for us focusing on Gilbert, and the fact that we were quarantined. But we were for the most part in our own little cocoon the five of us.

I treasured the little things. Placing my photo under his pillow each time we'd change his bed linens and watching him reach for it. One time that Wednesday afternoon laughing with him, as I corrected his memory about him rescuing me from the Lake of Shining Waters. Yet I also felt a darkness at times threatening us. Nightmares. I didn't dare then comfort him as I had the first night. I'd shake him, sooth his forehead, but maintain propriety. And when all else would fail, slap him with a wet cloth.

Thursday morning I'd been sitting with him, dozing slightly as the sky began to grow brighter when he'd began to thrash from a nightmare. Having learnt my lesson before, and hearing him cry out about Little Anne again, I didn't rush to rock him in my arms, but tried to shake him only to be pulled roughly into the bed with him as he sobbed clinging to me as he burned. I was mortified Davy found us thus an hour later when he'd come, but at least this time we had not been completely indecent.

Though as the day went Thursday, Gilbert began to worsen. His fever rose, and he began to be incoherent. At times he'd cling to me, recognizing none other in the room, at others he'd pull away, as though I'd burned him.

—*—*—*—*—*—

Author's Note: I actually went through the book Anne goes through... if you're curious look it up by the full name not Gray's Anatomy and you can find the book to view for free. I looked at a 1910 addition, it's interesting I will say that.