6 Comfort- Julien knows Rico doesn't love him and he doesn't love Rico, at least not like they used to, but it doesn't stop him from rubbing Rico's back and bringing him tea with honey after a particularly rough bought of coughing, at the rate and the number of flowers that Rico's bringing up he could use the comfort.

Flower notes: Purple Hyacinth flower is also a symbol of sorrow and sometimes forgiveness.

Violets symbolize innocence, modesty and true, everlasting love.

Carnations red = Deep Love and Admiration Yellow = Disappointment or Rejection Striped= Rejection or Regret

Cyclamen is a fun one because while it can symbolize tenderness, sincerity and lasting feelings the Victorians believed it to mean resignation, a final farewell. It is also highly poisonous.


Julien eyed the steaming cup of tea doubtfully and added more honey while whispering a prayer to the Sky Spirits. Even though generations of spiritual advisors throughout Madagascar had believed it to be the cure for the lovesickness Julien knew it was merely a temporary balm to soothe a raw throat.

After all, he had experienced the pain of the disease off and on for years, falling quickly in and out of love.

As he stirred the tea and watched the honey dissolve, he couldn't help but muse that it felt more unusual for him to have not had a case in the last few years. Maurice told him it was because he was older and had learned to not give his whole heart away. It sounded silly given that the first girl he had met after Clover, he had given his heart to the second, he saw her. Thinking about it, Sonia was probably the last time he had Hanahaki. Perhaps his uncle was referring to Rico, but he and Rico had both fallen fast and hard for each other. A bought of coughing from the next room shook him from his thoughts and he hurried to finish making the tea.

The coughing stopped in the few minutes it took him to get to the living room without spilling the hot tea and he silently cursed himself for wanting the largest apartment possible and the sight that awaited him broke his heart. Without further hesitation, Julien sat down next to where Rico was doubled over on the couch catching his breath and set the mug on the table noting the spray of red across the carpet and table.

"Here," Julien gently urged Rico to sit back and took the bloody flower heads from Rico's shaking hands, dropping them on the table and before grabbing the mug and pressing it into those bloodied hands. "I added extra honey, which I know isn't your favorite, but it will help."

As Rico took a drink, Julien looked at the pile of flowers on the table eyeing the mangled pile of purple hyacinth, violets, and a variety of carnations with sympathy. He understood all too well the pain of being in love with your best friend. Then his stomach dropped as he spotted a new flower among the bloody mess. Julien reached out and picked the flower out of the pile praying to the Sky Spirits that he was wrong in what he was seeing as he wiped some of the blood away.

Red gave way to white and Julien's heart broke. Cyclamen meant Rico would have a few weeks at best. He stared at the flower alarmed by how quickly the disease progressed in the last month. Or maybe it wasn't.

"Sorry," Rico mumbled guilt heavy in his stomach as he took the flower out of Julien's hand and threw it back onto the table with the others. Of course, Julien didn't have to say anything for Rico to know that he had put the pieces together and knew exactly what the flower meant. It was practically a white flag and without having to say anything to Julien the other man knew that something had broken inside him and he had given up on any scrap of hope that his feelings were returned.

"Don't apologize, because I'll cry and it'll ruin my make-up," Julien halfheartedly ordered and joked blinking away the tears that had formed in his eyes. His attempt to lighten the mood earned a small laugh from Rico who also looked to be on her verge of tears. Although it was hard to tell if it was from the current emotional atmosphere or from the excruciating pain that he had to be in. At this point, the roots would be starting to push outside of his lungs to reach into other organs. Julien gently tugged at Rico until the larger man was leaning against him. Despite their size difference Rico always enjoyed being the "little spoon" in any cuddling position especially one that allowed Julien to card his fingers through his hair, just as he was at that moment.

They sat in near silence for several minutes looking at the flowers on the table as if still processing what had occurred. Although they both knew that this point had been coming.

Finally, Julien spoke first, "Have your feelings on getting the surgery changed?" Do you still want to die?

Rico leaned further into Julien's touch before answering with a firm, "no." Yes.

"Then you should plan on telling them," Julien started and felt Rico jerk in his loose grip. "I didn't say him, because if you really think there is no chance of him returning your feelings or if you believe that he has found happiness with someone else," Julien found himself toying with the clover charm Rico had made him after they had come to a mutual agreement to stay friends, "then I support your decision to not say anything to him."

"Thank you," Rico whispered softly; his breathing strained.

"But you still need to tell your team or family, really, and your friends. They love you deserve to at least have the closure of knowing why you want this." Tell them why you are so determined to die.

In truth, Julien wanted to fight to convince Rico to get the surgery months ago once it became clear that the feelings between them had shifted and the Hanahaki was getting worse. But Julien understood what it was like to fall in love, suffer for weeks, for months in agony and then finally have that love returned only for it to be cruelly ripped away. And while Julien had always been able to bounce back and had relationships run their natural courses, that was far from the case for Rico. As the silence stretched on, he was prepared for the inevitable protest and argument. Rico talked like he was intending to crawl off and die like an animal and leave everyone wondering what happened to him.

Rico sat up suddenly and began to cough again this time with such violence that he started to choke and gag as flowers forced themselves from his lungs and into his throat. For a moment he thought he was going to blackout as his body was starved of oxygen, Julien's hand rubbing circles on his back a small comfort as he fought to breathe.