Disclaimer: I do not own Percy Jackson & the Olympians, Heroes of Olympus, or any other franchise in the Riordanverse. I do not own any of the characters from the Riordanverse or Greek Mythology. All bolded text is from the book and I do not own that either. I just own my writing and some of the reactions.

Please don't take down my story.


Sorry for the long wait. Everything's been a bit chaotic. I've decided to make my schedule to updating every sunday. I'm sorry for those waiting.


"WHAT IN THE HADES DID YOU BRATS DO TO MY KITCHEN?!" Hera screeched.

Percy looked up from the kitchen counter where he was nibbling on a blue cookie. "Cookie?"

"MY KITCHEN!" Hera continued to wail, throwing her arms out to the blue cookie-dough-covered walls.

Percy made a face at her and took another bite out of his cookie. Travis blinked at the queen of Olympus, opening his mouth to make a comment before Connor slapped a hand over it, pointing to the very irate Katie who was trying to listen to her mother's rant about cereal. Beckendorf passed a cookie to Silena, who's eyes lit up and thanked the blushing Beckendorf. Past-Annabeth was looking nervously from her future self to Athena in fear, the pair having some obvious tension. Luke was snickering, swiping a finger across the walls to eat some of the cookie dough.

Clarisse frowned at the cookie in her hand. "Why's it blue?"

"He already explained that," Apollo reminded her.

"Gods, Clarisse, keep up," Travis snorted. Clarisse spun Lamer - ahem Maimer - in her hands and Travis immediately paled. He ran out of the room screaming his apologised to the pissed Clarisse chasing him. Ares cheered for his daughter before Hestia chided him on 'encouraging violent behaviour', although her eyes were twinkling.

"WHY IS NO ONE DOING ANYTHING ABOUT MY KITCHEN?!" Hera shrieked. She turned to her husband accusingly.

Zeus seemed to straighten. "Y-yes, Hera is right. You all will clean up this mess at once! A-and will stop with this childish nonsense!" He looked to Hera to see if he said the right thing.

"I just came out here to have a good time, and I'm honestly feeling so attacked right now," Percy huffed. That seemed to get Future-Annabeth to pause in her and her mother's stare off to laugh at Percy.

"I've been meaning to ask," Travis began, having just come back from surviving Clarisse's wrath, his clothes singed and his hair messed up. He gestured vaguely at Percy. "What's with the little comments and shit."

Percy frowned. "'Little comments'?"

"Well earlier you said 'ok boomer'-" Conner quoted.

"And before you said something about Jamal and nines. What's that all about, hon?" Silena mentioned.

Percy's eyes widened. "What the fuck Richard?!"

"Language!" Demeter chastised.

"You mean you haven't seen memes or-or vines? What a sad world you live in," Percy mumbled.

"Vines?" Katie asked.

"Memes?" Clarisse asked.

"I saw you hanging out with Katlyn yesterday," Percy muttered mournfully.

Beckendorf sat up. "Rebecca, it's not what you think!"

"I won't hesitate bitch," Percy encouraged, pointing his pen at Beckendorf. "Another one of my brethren!"

Beckendorf laughed. "Oh gods, I'm so glad somebody else understands my references."

"Camp is far too sheltered for my liking," Percy snickered.

"Does that mean Annabeth from the future knows vines?"

Future-Annabeth gave a long suffering sigh. "You pick stuff up when you hang around this idiot and the rest of his cult."

"We must honour the garlic bread!" Percy whined.

Demeter straightened. "Bread?"

"Garlic?" Dionysus asked softly, looking excited.

"Cookie!" Hermes cheered.

Hera rubbed her nose with her hand and cursed loudly in ancient Greek. "Will you all just shut up!" She bellowed.

Everyone fell silent before Future-Annabeth broke it with: "Respect the drip, Karen."

Percy wiped a tear from his eye dramatically. "I'm so proud." Hera's eyes sharpened, she looked about ready to scream everyone's head off.

Hephaestus grunted, looking amused. "As much as I like bullying mother, we should get back to reading now that we've had our break."

Poseidon nodded, taking a bite out of his fifth cookie. "Indeed. I want to hear about my son in Camp Half-Blood."

Percy pulled the new fresh batch of cookies out of the oven. "I love magic baking." He mumbled. "Alright! We can go back to listening to my life story, I don't care. Do your think, Big Z."

Zeus grumbled something about being the king and being respected, but clapped his hands together, transporting them back to the throne room. Once they all got settled, the book was passed to Hermes, who grinned excitedly and turned it to the correct page before reading out:

"MY DINNER GOES UP IN SMOKE"