The security guards of SCP-173 were having a round of poker when one of them spoke up; "Guys, being serious here, I haven't heard the Nut move in like an hour." This brings looks of alarm to the other guards and prompts another to speak up; "I haven't heard a thing in 3 hours, thought I was just tuning its' movements out." It was at this point that one of them called raised the alarm.


/

There are 3 D-class personnel situated in front of SCP-173's container, they themselves are surrounded by 4 security personnel and one junior researcher.

The researcher, Dr. Stevens, began "Now that everyone is present, I will explain today's task." The D-class were clearly nervous, one of them trembling, and this announcement didn't calm their nerves.

"The three of you will be entering SCP-173's chamber to conduct an experiment. You will follow instructions or face termination. Follow instructions and you'll be fine. You are all familiar with SCP-173 protocol, announce when you need to blink, and don't take your eyes off the subject. Guards, when you're ready, send them in." At that Dr. Stevens retreated to a camera terminal and readied a notepad.

One of the guards took it upon themselves to offer some assurance to the, affectionately named, D-bois.

"Listen bros, you'll be fine. Dr. Dick over there didn't explain the situation, so I will. The Nut hasn't made a sound in like 6 hours. This means it's either dead, or sleeping – don't quote me on that because I have no idea if the fucking thing is even alive."

The D-class looked a little better, but still shaken. Another guard stepped up and held up some tic-tacs.

"Seriously, you'll be fine. Have a tictac, chill out, get the job done. Don't fuck up, and nothing will happen. Now get your asses in there."


/

Now standing in the chamber are three D-bois and one neck-snapping atrocity.

For a full minute nothing can be heard except for slow, heavy breathing and the occasional call of "blinking".

Things were going fine, then the PA spoke up;

"Attention D-class. For the purposes of this experiment, one of you must approach SCP-173 whilst the other two retreat to the far wall."

This prompts shouts and cries from said men. A quick game of rock-paper-scissors later and D-018263, aka Mike, is fronting on SCP-173 – taunting it with his jersey accent. After all, if you're going to die you might as well make it funny.

"All of you now need to blink at once."

This only results in 3 D-bois blankly staring at the PA speaker with incredulous scowls. It takes a moment for them to realise what they've done, and at the noise of concrete on concrete, they swerve back to witness SCP-173 hugging Mike.

Not snapping his neck, actually hugging the man.


/
Dr. Stevens is gaping at his camera feed as he furiously notes down his observations. This needs to be reported to the higher-ups.

His note-taking is interrupted by one of the D-class making a remark of "Waka". This is met by Mike and his compatriot glancing at the offender – resulting in 3 swiftly snapped necks.

Dr. Stevens debates chocking the deaths upto D-class stupidity or SCP interference and makes a note to request further testing.