Hello!

I loved 'If you fall' from JJ Heller, and many of her songs inspired me for Royai. 'Beautiful again' is part of these songs that I love.

So, I wrote a little something about Royai and what it inspired me. Initially in French I put the lyrics, but in English it seems that I can't. Each part is linked to a verse or the chorus of the song. I took the English dub of Brotherhood.

I hope you'll like it, enjoy!


Beautiful again


You have the kind of soul
You have the kind of eyes
That I want looking into mine
I want looking into mine
You don't even have to speak
I hear what you're telling me
The broken can be beautiful again

Beautiful again, JJ Heller


"The fighting may be, but the nightmares of what we did in this place are far from over."

War was over. Fighting had stopped. Amestris had won. At last, the Ishvalan extermination had come to an end.

Riza had seen relieved soldiers hugging, rejoicing, singing. They would come back home to find their families, friends, houses. To her, nothing was over. She'd seen destruction, she'd brought death by her own hands. More importantly, because she'd given him her father's research, Roy Mustang had become a killer.

She wanted to cry, but no tear came to her eyes. She was feeling empty, restless. What kind of rest was possible for her? After what she had done? Would she atone for her actions one day?

"I have a favour to ask, Mustang. Please burn this off. Deface my back."

Roy had protested. After she'd insisted, he'd finally accepted. Now they were facing each other and didn't dare to move in the small roof studio that Riza had found to rent in East City.

Roy was apprehensive. The circles under his eyes showed to Riza that he hadn't slept much since they got back from Ishval. They were the same. She couldn't sleep, and when she did, fearful nightmares awaken her, leaving her trembling, unable to close her eyes until dawn.

They couldn't go back to prevent this war from happening, but they could act to avoid new conflicts.

Riza turn her back to Roy and removed her top before laying down on the cold tiles.

"I'm sorry," he whispered. He snapped his fingers.

Pain was worse than anything she'd imagined. Her back was burning awfully, and her muffled cry changed into a whine. And it was only a part of what many Ishvalan had felt before they'd died.

Tears flowed on her cheeks as Roy copiously wetted her back. He cautiously treated her burn, applying bandages he'd soaked in ointment, constantly repeating 'I'm sorry, I'm sorry'.

"No, forgive me." Riza managed to say between two painful waves. "I made you do it when you didn't want to."

Lying on her stomach on her bed, she caught his hand as he walked away. "Thank you."

Their eyes met, and she saw his concern for her. For a short moment, she looked at Roy from her youth.

It would be difficult, but they could improve some things, protect those in need and change the country.

Despite her pain, Riza knew that she put all her power in order to stay beside Roy and help him to reach his goal.

"I'll follow you into hell, if you ask me to."


"I'm gonna have to call you right back. I've got a customer of my own to deal with."

"I think I was about to send the lieutenant to join her superior"

Lust's mocking voice rang in the vast room. Riza frowned, before the meaning of the homonculus' words hit her. It wasn't possible…

"Wait a minute!" She cried. "So when you said you've already had to kill someone... It can't be… You didn't…"

Lust sniggered. Riza's blood boiled. She'd dared attack him. Rage roared inside her.

"YOU BITCH!"

Each one of her bullets hit her enemy, although Lust stayed on her legs.

Riza used up all her ammunition, and despair took over rage. She couldn't do anything. Roy was dead. What could she do now? She hadn't been able to protect him, and her reason to live had disappeared.

She wept. She'd lost all she had, and death was her only way out. On her knees, she begged Alphonse to leave her and save himself. After all, he'd so much to see and do, he'd an objective, he'd to find his body, he'd to live.

Al refused. He would never let anyone die and would protect her, whatever the cost!

"Well spoken! I couldn't agree more!"

This voice… Riza's heart leaped in her chest. How was it even possible?

Alphonse created a stone wall seconds before flames crashed upon it, burning Lust to ashes.

Roy was alive, repeated Riza, incredulous, as her superior terminated the homunculus. When Lust turned to ashes for good, he collapsed on the floor with a pained cry. Riza ran to him.

"Are you alright?" He asked with a thin smile.

"Forget about me. We need to get you some help!"

Worry and relief fought in her, but when she looked at him, she knew that they would continue in spite of threats and intrigues. He was here.

"I'm gonna continue to rely on you to watch my back. Don't let me down."


"If they're brave enough to fight, how can I just sit here and wait?"

"Wait here, lieutenant. If anything happens to me, then at least you'll have a chance of getting out alive.

— No, sir."

"That was an order." He insisted.

"One that I cannot obey." She replied in the same tone.

His hands in his pockets, Roy turned to her.

"You're a stubborn one.

— That's something you've always known, sir."

Roy sighed and smiled.

"Alright. Will you stay here if I promise to come back?

— Yes. Happy hunting, sir!"

As Riza greeted him, he walked away and entered in the HQ. Riza stayed alone, watching the car, and she had plenty of time to think. The latest events hadn't let her rest for all day.

Edward and Alphonse had taken too many risks, and she hoped they could win against Gluttony. She'd been shocked when she'd learnt that King Bradley was a Homunculus. For Roy, it meant that his objective was further and more difficult to achieve. If the Military and the brass were involved it would be necessary to demote them or dismiss them dishonourably.

Night passed slowly, and the more hours went, the more Riza worried. What was happening in the HQ? Her worry grew as night disappeared. What had Roy found? Which officers were his allies? Which were his enemies?

An answer came running with Fuery.

"I received a memo from the Personnel Bureau. And… well, I'm being transferred to the Southern Command Centre.

— They transferred you?

— I'm not the only one…"

Breda was leaving for the West, Falman for the North command center. Their team was disbanded. Roy had failed, Riza realised with a heavy heart. Then, two officers arrived and gave her an assignment order.

Riza held the letter with trembling hands. Was it a hostage taking? Did Bradley know the bond Roy and her shared? How could she help him while working under his Excellency's orders?

Major Armstrong came by later and offered her to replace her for a moment. Riza took this time to organise her thoughts. If anything had happened to her Colonel, she couldn't run away. She had to respect the orders given by her superiors, although her loyalty was to Roy. A single tear escaped her eyes before she put back her impassive mask.

Roy was near the car when she arrived. She thanked Major Armstrong

"So you didn't run off." Roy sounded surprised.

"Someone once told me to never give up, no matter what. And once was all I needed."

Riza threw to him his own words and Roy stayed silent for a moment. Then, he smiled.

"Just don't ever tell me later that you'd wish you'd run when you had the chance."

"It's too late for regrets."

They exchanged smiles. Of course, she would never give up. Roy was her purpose in life, and she would stay loyal to him, even apart from each other. He'd gave her too much for her to run away because of a failure, even a painful one. They would find a way. They cared too much for each other.

"Don't die!"


"No matter where you are, I will be watching you from the shadows."

Pride's words were permanently engraved in Riza's mind as she collapsed in the hallway of her flat. Not only the Führer was a homunculus, but his son too. The situation couldn't be more delicate. Riza had managed to reply despite the fear crawling under her skin. Pride couldn't kill her, otherwise the homunculi would lose their pressure mean on Roy.

The phone rang and Riza was out of her thoughts. Apprehensive she picked up the handset. Roy's voice rang, light and playful.

"Hello there, madam! This is your neighbourhood florist."

Riza sighed, relieved. Her answer was a bit harder than she wished, though.

"Ah, sorry. I kind of got drunk and somehow bought a car full of flowers." He apologized." Do you want to do me a favour and take some off my hands?"

Riza calmed down. Roy's character couldn't be changed easily. He could always find the worst excuses to call her. However, he didn't often do it on the right moment. She couldn't tell him what had just happened at the Führer's mansion. However her silence might had sounded suspect.

"What's wrong?" He asked, alarmed. "Did something happen?"

"No, sir" she replied. "It's nothing.

"Are you sure?" He sounded unconvinced.

"Yes, sir, everything's fine. And sorry to let you down, but I don't even own a flower vase. Thank you for thinking of me, though. Have a good night."

Riza hung up and turned to Black Hayate who was looking at her, intrigued. She hugged her dog warmly. How did Roy do to always have such an uncanny timing? She knew he hadn't been fooled. They knew each other enough to know their glances and their silences equally spoke for them. He would worry for her, wonder what she'd hidden. She'd have to warn him without worrying more.

"Well, apparently, Scar's up on the North."


"I told you… we have run out of time."

Her life ran through her fingers and cold diffused in all her body. Her sight became blurry and breathing was more and more difficult. Each respiration burnt her throat. The gold-toothed doctor insisted. Roy had to try human transmutation. "No, she tried do protest, he shouldn't do it". Riza gathered her energy and stared at Roy. Anguish, wrath, pain melted in his black eyes. "He doesn't have to do human transmutation. He mustn't do it." It was the only thought in her mind. Her words chocked in her throat, so she conveyed them to him through her eyes.

Pained eyes replied to her. A sudden movement above her made her look away. "We've got allies," she realised as Roy lowered his head.

"All right, Lieutenant. I won't perform the transmutation."

He was full of renewed determination, and Riza knew she didn't have to worry anymore.

She was cold, her fingers had frozen on her neck and she couldn't move. She was numb, and her eyes closed against her will.

All was confused. She heard shouts, the sound of hits, bodies falling. Then she felt softly warm when someone took her in their arms. She was gently laid on the floor and suddenly her pain faded away. She moaned as sensations returned in her body, before loving arms took her.

Riza opened her eyes and meet Roy's, full of concern.

"Colonel, I'm so sorry."

"Don't speak, just rest now."

"You understood my signal. I'm not sure how, but I'm glad."

Roy smiled. "We've been together long enough. And besides, I know that glare. It means 'Use human transmutation, and I'll shoot you'."

Riza smiled in turn. She would have never forgiven herself if he'd obey orders. Deep relief stroke upon her. She hadn't lost Roy. He helped her to stand up. Darius and Zampano knocked out the Doctor's last henchman.

Peace didn't last long. Bradley entered in the room. Surprisingly, he was wounded and didn't seem to regenerate. He glanced at her and Riza felt Roy's hand squeeze her shoulder and bring her closer to him.

"Knowing that weakling's heart of yours, I thought that if someone dear to you fell, you would do anything to save her. Even if it meant human transmutation."

"There was a time where I might have. But that time is behind me. Luckily, I have people by my side now who'll stop me from being reckless and keep me heading down the right path."

A menacing aura surrounded Bradley. May Chang shouted that the centre was below them. Jerso collapsed on the floor, wounded, and Pride came down in the room through the same way the others did.

Roy entrusted Riza to Darius, but Bradley's sudden attack brought him to the ground. The Führer pinned him with a sword in his hand palms.

"Colonel!"

They couldn't do anything, and Riza, useless, watched the man she loved and almost lost an hour earlier being forced to perform human transmutation. He vanished into the air.

While May destroyed the ground to infiltrate the enemy's lair, Scar engaged the fight with Bradley. For long minutes, during the eclipse, Riza couldn't think of anything else than Roy. Was he unharmed? What had he lost? How would she find him? When General and Major Armstrong barged in, she told them what had happened, taking the defence of the chimeras. Some of Briggs soldiers had recognized them as Kimblee's pawns.

"You look exhausted, Lieutenant," Olivier Armstrong said. "Rest for a while, you need it. We don't have to move as long as we don't have news from the surface."

"Alright, then, I'll rest. But until the Colonel's return."

He would come back for sure, Riza knew it. She didn't know in which state, and it anguished her terribly.

"Lieutenant, can you still fight?"


"But I will accept your offer, and I'll devote my life to seeing Ishval restored."

Two weeks later Roy was released from hospital with Riza. She'd look after him for the next days he would spend without seeing in his place. They settled in the Colonel's flat, who quickly got used to walk and avoid bumping on the furniture. Riza found it strange to get used to this new life. She thought she would help Roy for some difficult tasks, but he was the one telling her where things were three days after their release.

Living together was peaceful, but Riza knew that the day where they would have to speak seriously was coming. What would they do with what they'd said during Promised Day? How would they continue together? Being beside Roy was enough for now, but some things were left unsaid, because they couldn't convey it through glances. And it was burdening. During a walk with Black Hayate, she bit the bullet.

"Colonel, sir," she began with a firm voice.

"Roy." He interrupted her. Riza couldn't say anything, too taken aback. "Call me Roy. It's the name my parents gave me, and I'd like you to use it too. Too few people have used it these last years, and I want you to be part of them."

At first a bit unsettled, Riza pulled herself together and smiled.

"Roy, what will we do after you get your sight back?"

He stopped walking and turned to her. They would keep doing what they were doing the best: being together and take care of each other.

"What do you mean? The Military won't allow us to do as it pleases us. Must we keep it a secret, as usual?"

"Every word I said in the tunnels that day was the truth. I wish to stay by your side all my life, and I'll do all I can to make it legitimate."

Riza blushed, suddenly grateful for Roy's blindness. He'd already seen her surprised, crying, depressed, happy, however he'd never seen her blushing like a fourteen-years-old girl, and she didn't want him to see her like that. However, how long could they wait?

Roy took her hand gently and kissed her fingers.

"I know someone who support us and will help us."

His amused grin made Riza smile in turn.

"You can invite him for the day you'll get your sight back. Last time I heard of him, he was coming to Central for the negotiations on Bradley's successor."

Roy nodded. For the professional part, he trusted her blindly. Riza squeezed his hand twice and changed the subject.

"I know Izumi Curtis helped you in Father's lair. I would like to thank her."

"Again?" Roy asked, a bit surprised. "You already did that in the hospital."

"We're never too grateful." Riza replied, entwining her fingers with his. "Besides, I hope that Ling Yao has arrived safe and sound in Xing."

"If he manages to become emperor, he will make a fine ally. Trading with his country will help us."

"I'm sure of it. Olivier won't appreciate that you take so many initiatives."

"You call her by her name? She will kill me if I do the same."

Riza chuckled and they resumed their walk.

"She was kind enough to let Vato return to our team."

"I lent him to her because I had no choice. Now that I can, I take him back."

Riza stayed silent a moment, choosing her next words carefully.

"I'm really happy that Edward brought his brother back. I wish him to be happy for all his life."

"He was strong enough to sacrifice his alchemy in exchange of Alphonse. For that I really admire him."

"Would I be able to do so, I would have sacrificed my alchemy power for you." Riza squeezed his hand again.

A smile spread wide on his face as he stopped and turned to her. He took her face in his hands and whispered.

"Me too."

"What would really please that old man is you taking my grand-daughter as your future First Lady."