Aguri wishes she could say she thought it all was a bad dream.
For a moment, perhaps, some part of does. She can almost reach out and grasp it: pretend she'd imagined it... that she doesn't have Yanagisawa to worry about and that things are back to normal… that she's going to see The Reaper again and that after that she's looking forward to spending time with her sister. But try as she might there's this nagging feeling in the back of her mind… a persistent pain… and as she awakes with a gasp she's not afforded even a second to believe she'd made this up.
No, She's instantly overwhelmed with pain.
She's not sure how long she's been unconscious for. She doesn't even remember falling unconscious at all. But the minute her eyes flutter open she wishes, already, that she could return to that state. For a sudden wave of nausea overtakes her… and as her limbs start to twitch she's reminded, again, of what situation she's in: that there's no chance of this being a dream... and that she's not only alive, but…
...In a situation where she very well may soon wish she weren't.
'No,' she thinks, trying to steady her breaths. 'Don't think like that.' It may hurt to inhale, but that's no excuse to… to…-
'Give up?'
Her lip wavers. She shakes her head. 'You're… fine,' she tries to reassure herself. 'You're… fine. He's just having an episode, that's all.' Sure… Yanagisawa has never done anything like this before, but it wouldn't be the first time he's taken his anger out on her. He'll calm down in no time. And he'll…-
Well- he won't apologize. He never has. But he'll let her out of here. And then she'll… she'll…
She'll find a way to be fine.
She flinches, abruptly, as a wave of pain washes over her. It's a sharp, blistering sensation… seeming to flow from her stomach and radiate out towards the rest of her body. She lets out an involuntary cry as it does, but manages to grit her teeth and hold back the tears. The pain is decidedly less than before, she notes, even if that in and of itself is still overwhelming. She needs to focus on the good things right now. She needs to focus on the good things right now. She…-
...Her stomach's started to twitch.
It's a disgusting sensation... the sort that makes her sick. Not only is it a reminder that she'd been impaled; made a stupid decision that'd nearly gotten her killed, but it's a reminder of why she's still here breathing at all. She'd only gotten a brief look at her wound earlier… but it had been bad. Torn muscles and discolored sinew. Oh, she hadn't just nearly died... who is she kidding? She had died.
And Antimatter had saved her.
Aguri shuts her eyes... grits her teeth and blinks back tears. She hates herself for feeling so ashamed and scared.
'You got yourself into this situation, didn't you?' she thinks. 'What right do you have to feel this way? You're the one who didn't leave sooner. And you're the one who jumped into the line of fire. What did you think would happen?'
...Death. She thought death would happen. And it's not that - she didn't want to - she didn't crave it! But she thought it'd be peaceful, at least. Not like this. Nothing like this.
As her stomach twitches and the fire continues to flow through her veins her mind wanders back to The Reaper. He'd looked so calm on the other side of the glass. She wonders if he'd felt this way, too... so scared and sad. Head pounding, throat raw... so close to vomiting. The thought makes her ache.
She wonders how he's doing right now... if he misses her. Is he preparing to go teach her students, or-?
(Yanagisawa's words hang in her mind. 'He doesn't care about you.' And despite herself, they make her pause.)
Of… of course he's preparing to go teach her students. Why wouldn't he be? He's her friend, after all, isn't he? He'll… stay true to his word.
...He has to.
She wonders if Yanagisawa still wants to hurt him. The answer is almost certainly yes, but she doesn't want to think about it. After all… she still needs to reason with him. What if she asks him to let her go and the only way he'll agree is if she joins him on his revenge quest? She can't possibly agree to that. But what other choice does she have? She can't just stay here.
(...Can she?)
Maybe she'll have to lie. She'd feel bad about doing it, but… she has a little sister to get home to. She has things she's afraid of. She can't just grit and bear this - not even out of the kindness of her heart.
...She wonders how her sister is doing right now. Akari. She hopes she's not crying too much. In hindsight, she wishes she'd asked Reaper to keep an eye on her too... but it had just been so hard to think at the time. And despite herself, Akari had been the last thing on her mind. Aguri wonders, absentmindedly, if that makes her a bad sister… but soon shakes her head and sighs.
It doesn't matter. Akari would be fine without her either way. She's a strong, independent young woman, and much more successful than her screwup of an older sister. She's sure she'll be alright. And, besides…
She'll see her again soon.
She has to. When she gets out of here it'll be the first thing she does. She'll apologize for her thickheadness and tell Akari she's sorry. Then give her sister a big hug and promise nothing like this will happen ever again. That's all.
She lets out a shaky breath… suppress a whimper. That's right… she won't spiral. She won't get into the same self-deprecating mindset she always does. She's going to stay optimistic. And she's going to get out of here. All she has to do is wait.
...That, and say she'll kill her best friend.
'It's okay,' she thinks. 'He won't hold it against you. And besides… it's not like you're actually going to do it. You just need to get out of here so you can see him again at all. You can apologize to him, too, when you do.'
She knows she's overthinking it, but what else can she do? She's left alone here with her thoughts... and no matter how much she hates it it's only natural. She's a lonely person. When she doesn't have someone to talk to her mind tends to wander. It's why she hates being alone in the first place. But she doesn't have much of a choice. Not right now, at least. It's either let her mind wander or focus on the pain.
A jolt of electricity runs down her spine and all at once she's sure. Yes: she much prefers the thoughts.
She tries to think of a plan… what exactly she'll say to Yanagisawa when she sees him again. Should she apologize? She's usually pretty quick to beat herself up but she still can't see what she did there as wrong. What if she doesn't come across as genuine? Maybe she should say that she'll just try anyways. 'I'm scared, but I'd like to help out.' That… or maybe she should try to seem more brutal. 'I'm mad about what he did to me, too. I'll avenge my coworkers, I swear.'
Gahhhhhh. She's hardly sure that will sound authentic. She's not exactly a vengeful person. She hates having to lie about this at all. She hates this entire situation!
She wishes it came easier to her. Like Reaper.
Now he was good at hiding his feelings. That wasn't always a good thing... she thinks it held him back in a lot of ways. But right now it sure would come in handy.
She lets out a sigh. Her throat feels sore… like she'd been screaming long after she passed out, but she tries to shut her eyes and relax… ignore the boiling pain and focus on his face. She can be strong, like Reaper. And she'll see him again, soon.
(She shoves the pictures of his victims from her mind. No. That's not what strong is, she swears.
That's not…-)
Yanagisawa said he'd make her strong, too.
Those were his words, weren't they? Something like 'I'll make something even more powerful than my first creation.' She wonders what that means. She hates to admit it, but that seems to indicate she'll be in here a very long time even if she does agree. The thought makes her sick. No… she needs to get out of here as soon as possible. Go for a 'field test' and run. Run as fast as she can.
Yes. She'll convince him, and then she'll… run.
She wonders what will happen to her body after that. She watched what happened to Reaper, but there's not nearly that amount of Antimatter in her bloodstream yet, is there? She won't be at a risk of exploding. At least… she shouldn't be. And she probably won't mutate.
(Unconsciously, her fingers twitch.)
...Not yet.
She knows how dangerous this entire situation is. She's not exactly the most intelligent person, but she worked at the lab. She's a chemist. Hell... she's the one who studied Reaper the most! So it's not like she's going into this entirely blind. She knows what situation she's in. And… she'll use that knowledge to reassure herself. "I'm going to be fine," she whispers. "For now… I'm going to be fine."
Another raggedy sigh. Despite herself, she feels sick. And even if she'll be okay her whole body aches. A temporary pain, but like nothing she's ever felt. Some part of her almost wants to laugh.
'Well,' she thinks. 'I guess I'll never be able to complain about being hit again. Not when I've felt this.'
It's not funny. Even she knows that, but it's all she has. She cranes her head back and stares up at the ceiling.
There's no use in dwelling on depressing things. Not when she needs to keep herself cool. She should… think about something that makes her happy. Yes, that's what she needs right now... a happy memory.
It takes a while to find one... at first her mind wanders to fists against face and Reaper's crazed screams. But eventually as she wades through recollections of insults and small disagreements with her family she stumbles upon something she can look back on fondly. She can't believe she almost forgot.
...Reaper had told her he believed in her.
It had happened right before all of this went down. And so she supposes it was easy to forget in the onslaught, but… he'd touched her face, hadn't he? Yes, she remembers the golden glow. She'd begged him to give her the strength to live one more year and he'd reached out through the glass. Told her that whatever she faced… he was sure she could handle it.
Ha. How little either of them knew at the time.
She's not sure why she tears up. It's a good memory. She shouldn't be… scared. She tries to shake the feeling off, but it's no use. Little tears trail down her cheeks, and she can't even reach up to wipe them.
She feels pathetic. But she tries not to dwell on that, either. And… she tries to forget what The Reaper told her. As much as it means to her she can't go getting choked up right now. She can't risk Yanagisawa seeing her that way. He can't think she's scared. No, not at all.
...She needs to look brave.
It's a long time before she sees him again. For a moment she even briefly wonders if he'd abandoned her here. But she quickly shakes the thought. 'No. He's too narcissistic,' she declares, before shaking that, too.
'No. Not narcissistic,' she rectifies. 'Just… passionate. He's too passionate about this to leave me here.'
(Some part of her still feels the need to make excuses.)
Her mind wanders up and down like that the whole time. Doubting her situation and then reminding herself to think about this calmly… kindly, too. 'You'll be okay,' again and again. Fighting back tears, and repeating it like a mantra. 'You don't have anything to be scared of. You're going to be okay. All you have to do is be optimistic. Like… like you've always been.'
('You've… always been okay.'
She purges the sensation of dying from her mind.)
She's half asleep when the door creaks open. Yanagisawa steps inside, and Aguri flinches on instinct.
She looks his way. He's much less disheveled than before, but that hardly says much. Even with a fresh set of bandages and a newly-white lab coat he's got a certain unsteadiness to the way he walks. His knuckles are pale and his hair is in disarray.
...She can't see his eye.
He approaches, stiltedly. And as he does Aguri gives him a smile. Some part of her wants to quiver… but she can't risk that, not now.
"Kotaro!" she says. "You're back. I'd almost thought you left me here."
He doesn't give her so much as a glance. Simply digs through his things and frowns.
"Listen," Aguri continues, voice tense. "I've been thinking about what we talked about earlier, and… I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said those things to you. And I shouldn't have told you I wouldn't fight Reaper. I… think I want to, actually. What he did was really horrible and I…" she pauses. "I want to make things right. I want to stop him before he hurts anyone else."
She expects some kind of reaction, but Yanagisawa gives her none. Expression neutral, he empties something bright red into a vial.
Aguri squirms slightly.
"And I know… I know I really disrespected you," she continues. "But I wasn't thinking straight, I swear. I was in a lot of pain, and well…-" she pauses. "You know how I am... making dumb decisions all the time. It's only like me to screw up then." She lets out a tired laugh. "But... I've changed my mind, alright? I… I want to take everything I said back. And I want to help you out. So please… undo my restraints. You can let me out of here and we can try this again. I'll do things right this time."
It's another long moment before Yanagisawa replies. Aguri almost starts to think he's ignoring her… and even opens her mouth to speak, but before she can get a word out he finally responds.
"You really think I'll fall for this, huh?"
Aguri's mouth feels dry.
"I'm… not sure what you're talking about. I mean… I-"
"No, Yukimura. No. Absolutely not."
Yanagisawa draws closer… and Aguri's blood runs cold.
"What do…- what do you mean, no? I just-" Her breath hitches. "I just said I'd help you out!"
"And I said no," Yanagisawa replies, teeth grit. "I warned you what you were getting into before and you didn't listen to me. You made your choice and this is your life now. Nothing you say is going to change my mind about that. I've already given you more than enough chances."
"One more," Aguri begs. "One more chance. That's all I need. I promise. I won't- I'm not going to leave! I just- I can't possibly get into fighting shape like this. "
"Like you care," Yanagisawa retorts. "First of all, I don't believe you. Don't think I'm stupid, woman. I know exactly what you're doing. You're just saying what I want to hear. And even if you weren't, it's too late. You've already sealed your fate. "
"Not only did you disrespect me, insult me, and lie to me," he continues, reaching out for her arm. "But you cheated on me, ruined my experiment, and almost got me killed. I don't care what you have to say. You're out of chances, Yukimura. And you're getting what you deserve."
Aguri struggles to pull her arm away, but it's no use. She can't fight the restraints. And as she lets out a whimper Yanagisawa's iron grip closes in around her wrist. He pumps a syringe, teeth clenched. And only as he lets out a disapproving sneer is she able to finally meet his gaze.
...Finally able to see the fire behind his eye.
Like nothing she's ever seen from him before, his expression overflows with fervor. Filled with determination and hate… he stares down at her like she's the most disgusting thing he's ever seen. And slowly… he brings the needle to her skin.
"Kotaro," Aguri repeats, feeling feverish. "Please. I'm begging you just to think this through. Take one second. That's all. You're going to regret this."
"No. I won't. I know I'm making the right decision. And you can make me out to be the irrational one all you want… you can call me crazy, lady. But if you think you can tell me how I feel, then, well…-" Yanagisawa pauses. "Then you're the crazy one."
That's all it takes. With those final venomous words, he presses the syringe down. The needle breaks Aguri's skin, and all at once, she's on fire again. Writhing, screaming… Aguri shrieks and pulls back… slams her head against the operating table and attempts to kick. But even as magma flows through her veins she can't let Yanagisawa go… not yet. And as he turns to leave she lets out an inhuman screech.
"PLEASE!" She begs. "JUST LET ME OUT OF HERE! I'M BEGGING YOU!"
(THIS MAY BE THE LAST CHANCE SHE HAS!)
"And there it is," Yanagisawa says, back turned to her. "Your true motivation. You can tell me whatever you want… tell me you're going to help me, even. But I will never let you go. You wanna know why?"
"Because this isn't about getting what I want. It's about punishing you. And THIS is what you fucking deserve."
Aguri continues to scream. But if Yanagisawa cares he certainly doesn't voice it. He simply gives her one last dirty look and stares at her outreached hand, before shaking his head, stepping out, and slamming the door behind him.
"I'll be back," Aguri thinks she hears him say as it locks. "And try as you might to change my mind next time… the answer will only be the same. After all, I think there's only one thing I want deep down."
"...To hear you continue to scream like this for the rest of your miserable life."
With that, he disappears for real. And try as she might, Aguri can't help but let out a wail. Because not only does it hurt, but now… really and truly… she has nothing left to lose.
The next few days pass much the same.
Well… Aguri's not sure they're days, actually… it's hard to keep track of time in this place. But whenever she sees Yanagisawa he's in the same crappy mood. And although she attempts to appeal to his human side it's no use. He's become convinced of what he's doing… and grows ever more violent when she attempts to suggest an alternative.
"You can't weasel your way out of this one," he chides, hooking her up to an IV so he can keep her fed. "I'm done falling for your tricks."
Aguri shivers and lets out a sigh.
It's maybe a week into her predicament that she stops asking him to reason with her. She feels like she should be stronger than that… but she can't bear for a minute longer to hear what he has to say. When she begs for mercy he reminds her that she'll never see her friends or family again, and that's an ache her heart can't handle. She'll… she'll just have to find another way out.
(The place is in ruins, after all.)
Yanagisawa smirks as he steps into the room. Says something about her silence being music to his ears.
"Not that you'll be silent for long, of course," he says as he reaches for the syringe.
Aguri struggles to blink back tears.
She wishes she could say she's grown used to the pain by now- but she hasn't. As ever-constant as it is, it somehow seems to grow worse each time, and she dreads the wild thrashing of her limbs. She wishes she could feel whatever it is that Reaper felt... he certainly hadn't looked afraid undergoing the same experiments. But even praying to him for strength, she still flinches as Yanagisawa approaches.
"At least tell me how long it's been," she begs. "I'm starting to lose track of time in here."
"Does it really matter?" Yanagisawa replies. "It's not like the outside world misses you, anyways."
Aguri wants to argue… but she just can't find the words. And something tells her that's not just because of the fear of retribution, either.
She wonders, absentmindedly, how Reaper and Akari are doing.
...That said, of course, she doesn't ask.
(Quite frankly, she's not sure she can handle the answer.)
She passes the time with thoughts of them. That, and thoughts of her students. Yes… when she's not utterly incoherent with pain, they're what keeps her strong. She dwells on the good memories - clings to them like a safety blanket… and manages to smile, ever-briefly. She shakes off that doubt and promises herself that they miss her. They have to. Otherwise…
Well, what is she worth?
Maybe she's getting her hopes up just a little too much. But she thinks it's important to focus on what you do have during a time like this.
When she's not focusing on them she's assessing the lab… trying to make an escape plan of some sort. She's not particularly strong or smart like Reaper was… but she has his previous escape to go off of. The lab's still in shambles, and a few of the walls around her have collapsed. If she manages to break free of her restraints she'll be as good as gone. Though of course… Yanagisawa had anticipated that, too.
They're tight 'round her wrists and her ankles. And no matter how hard she tries to slip out it's simply no use. She's not particularly amorphous or destructive… not like the Reaper was at the end there.
(She's not particularly sure she wants to be.)
Yanagisawa must see her trying to break free one day, because as he steps inside he rolls his eyes.
"Cut that out, will you?" he says, slapping her hand. "It's no use."
All the same, Aguri struggles until her wrists are red and raw.
She can hear construction somewhere further in the lab. Yanagisawa is already no doubt fixing what it is that Reaper broke. Aguri wonders what will happen when the construction gets to her. This is the most important room to fortify, isn't it? But there's no way Yanagisawa is doing all of this on his own. He has to have hired people. They aren't seriously just going to leave her here, are they?
Maybe she can… she can rely on them for help!
She tries to shout down the hallways, but it's no use. Yanagisawa tells her to shut up, and if they hear her, the workers certainly don't respond.
"You're not getting out of here," he insists sometime the next day. "Try as you may, Yukimura, no-one's coming to help you."
"...This is illegal, Kotaro. Eventually someone will get wind of what's going on-"
"And they won't care. You remember what we did to The Reaper, don't you? There were hundreds of scientists in that lab and not a single one of them gave a shit. Even you, who was busy sucking him off, didn't attempt to 'help.' No-one's going to put themself at risk assisting you… and besides." He gives a nasty sneer. "Even if you did get out of here I'd just find someone to replace you. Maybe that precious sister of yours. Would you like to see her in this situation?"
Now that shuts Aguri up. Struggling for breath, she shakes her head.
"N… no-" she whispers. "Anything but that. Leave Akari out of this-"
"I will," Yanagisawa coos. "As long as you behave." He pats Aguri on the head. "Now stop struggling. Enough with the shouting. Enough with the fighting your restraints. You don't want to go making me really pissed off, do you?"
"...No," Aguri murmurs. "No."
"Exactly. So be on your best behavior… or else."
His voice is a feverous growl.
Maybe a few months ago Aguri would have perceived that as an empty threat. But now chained up to this operating table she has no doubt her ex-fiance would be willing to do the same to her baby sister. She can't possibly risk that. Not even if it fucking kills her.
...If she gets out of here, it's going to have to be on Yanagisawa's terms.
Needless to say, Aguri stops struggling.
A few days later Yanagisawa notes that the skin around her wound is discolored. He crouches and unbuttons her patient's gowns to get a better look. Trying desperately to ignore her growing discomfort, Aguri wonders exactly what that means. Discolored as in… infected? Or greyish, like Reaper'd been at the end there?
She asks, but he doesn't answer her. Instead, slinking up to her side, he takes a good look at her arm and describes that as well.
"Discolored, too," he notes. "Reddish veins. Interesting."
Those she can see. She hadn't particularly noticed it, but now that he points it out to her, her veins are looking weird. And it's not even just that they're twitching… there's a definitive crimson tint to them. That leaves a strange taste in her mouth.
"Reaper didn't display physical changes nearly this soon. A result of the alterations… or simply your own lack of an emotional fortitude?"
Yanagisawa rubs at his chin, and Aguri's brow furrows. Alterations… what exactly does that mean?
Well… she supposes it only makes sense that he changed something if his intent is to make her even stronger than her predecessor… but she doesn't know what it is that he'd have altered. She wishes she could take a glance at his notes for just a second. At least if she were in the exact same scenario as Reaper she'd know what she's getting into… but now she's completely in the dark.
...Does that mean she has less time before it's too late? More? She's hardly sure what she should think!
Either way, she thinks about it long after Yanagisawa is gone.
Is… is what she's going through more painful than what Reaper went through? That would certainly explain her incoherent reaction. But the minute she has the thought she shakes it off. No… it's narcissistic to minimize his pain. She's sure this felt every bit as bad for him as it is for her. He was just better at hiding it.
(She remembers him smiling, even after coughing up a puddle of blood onto the floor.)
She wishes she could hide it, too.
She feels bad about what Yanagisawa said about her not helping him. Should she have...- should she have done something? She wouldn't have known where to start… but now that she thinks about it she really hadn't stood up for Reaper, had she? How can she possibly expect anyone to stand up for her now?
'I'm sorry,' she thinks. 'I was just scared. That… and I didn't want to let go of you.' She shuts her eyes. 'You were the only company I had. I'll apologize for that, too, when I see you again.'
(She… she has to. At least once. Please. There's so much left for her to say. Who cares if she can't fight back and she can't reason with Yanagisawa? There has to be another way… right?)
She tries to get a look at her 'discolored' wound, but it's simply no use. She can't crane her head far enough, and her abdomen's covered, anyways. She's left alone with her thoughts… and boy do they run wild.
She can feel it twitching sometimes: her wound. It has since the beginning, but it's getting worse. Where it'd once only twitched after antimatter injections, now it's moving all the time. The sensation makes her deadly queasy.
It feels like it wants to break away from her skin. Aguri almost wishes she could let it.
Her arms and legs are spasming now, too… and her fingers are worse. They've gone beyond jerking and have begun to contort. It doesn't hurt, at least not more than anything else… but staring at the bright red blood flow running up the back of her palm, she feels her stomach do flips. Something is horribly, horribly wrong.
(It's not just her wound that wants to break away, is it? Her whole body wants to crack.
She wonders if it's too late for her. She wonders how long it's been.)
She keeps telling herself she'll be able to live a normal life… when she gets out of here, she means… but it's becoming harder and harder to believe that will happen at all. She really doesn't want anything happening to Akari, and the more than Yanagisawa talks the more he scares her. Is she going to be here forever? Is this the rest of her miserable life?
...She knows she'd probably deserve it, but-
No. Someone will come to rescue her… she's sure.
They… have to. Reaper will notice there was something suspicious about her death or Akari will notice Yanagisawa's behaving even more erratically than usual and they'll come back for her. They'll get her out of here. And then… then-
Well- Akari will be fine. Aguri will make sure of it. Reaper and her will protect her, and…-
She'll get her happy ending.
She doesn't believe it, not even for a second… but it's a nice fantasy. When you don't stand a chance of really fighting back against someone like this, you'll take anything you can get.
(When you know you won't be missed, it's nice to at least pretend you are.)
...Aguri wishes she wasn't so weak-willed.
She's crying most of the time now. She hates it… because she knows it delights Yanagisawa, but there's nothing else she can do. Even when she's not in overwhelming pain she simply doesn't know how else to let out her emotions. She feels lost now more than ever, and she wishes more than anything she just had someone to talk to.
That's how Reaper avoided going insane, isn't it? She wasn't a very good friend to him, but at least he had her. Aguri… she has nothing.
Nothing except Yanagisawa.
But he doesn't talk to her. Not even in an angry way, most of the time. He simply observes her… maybe makes a bitter comment or two, and then turns to go. Aguri doesn't know why, but that's worse. It's like… a facsimile of human connection.
...She's really lonely.
As the days continue to pass the construction progresses. She tries to estimate how long it's been based on that, but it's hard. Has… has she seen that person before? Has it been a day? Or is this simply a second shift? It's hard to tell. She's pretty sure it's been somewhere around a few weeks, but there's no being certain.
('What if you've only been here for a few days?' she thinks. 'A few days and you're already losing your mind?'
...Wouldn't that be frightening?)
She tries to make small talk with the workers as they draw in closer, but it's no use. Even though she doesn't ask them for help, Yanagisawa seems irritated by her attempts at small talk… and the workers don't respond, anyways. They simply give her an unamused, pitying look, and then carry on with their routine.
Aguri wonders if she's human to them.
Slowly but surely the glass is repaired and Aguri's prison is complete. After that, the workers seem to disperse entirely… at least from any place she can see. And as her hope of escape continues to dwindle, the loneliness returns.
She's drowning in it, one night, when Yanagisawa approaches. It's strange, because she thinks she saw him only a few hours ago… but then again, there's no trusting her sense of time. She gives him a worried look as he draws closer, noting his strange apparel.
Up until now, he's stuck to his lab coat… but suddenly he's in something that much more closely resembles robes. Long and white, with ends that taper off to the side and massive sleeves, there's a sort of eeriness to it. He's got a cowl 'round his neck... although it's not up at the moment, and thick, fabricy-looking gloves. It may just have to be one of the strangest things Aguri's ever seen.
She doesn't comment on it as he approaches… of course she doesn't- she's not that stupid, but he must catch her giving him a weird look, because he lets out a chuckle.
"What?" he asks. "Befuddled by my new outfit? I suppose I can't particularly blame you." He brings his hand to his chin. "But that's not what I'm here to talk about. I've been thinking… and I have a proposition to make to you."
Aguri doesn't get her hopes up… not yet, but she gives a nod.
"What is it?" She asks.
She's sure it's just something more to do with the experiment… and something she won't have any say in, either, for that matter. It's not like Yanagisawa would give her good news... but the phrase 'preposition' alone still excites her. Anything is better than sitting here lonely. And even if he's just going to torture her, at least h-
"I've been thinking about letting you go."
Aguri's thoughts slow to a halt. At first she thinks he's mocking her, but then she meets his eye. He's saying that with a surprisingly serious expression.
"You… you really mean that!?"
She can't stop the excitement from creeping into her tone. Even if it seems too good to be true, at least it's a good thought at all! And hey…! He doesn't shake his head at her response. Maybe… maybe he's really going to-
"Of course I mean that," he says with another laugh. "I've been thinking over your argument and I just couldn't stop remembering what you said about the two of us working together. Even if it's very true you hurt my feelings… I… have a feeling you could be an invaluable ally, Yukimura."
"Of course this wouldn't be an arrangement without strings attached," he continues, fingers steepled. "I'd still require you to kill The Reaper… but I wouldn't need to keep you in this stuffy lab any further. Who knows! Perhaps I could even let you see your sister again. Wouldn't that be nice?"
"Y… yes!" Aguri cries. "It would!"
She's still not certain… it seems so unlike him… but he says it with such an amiable expression on his face. How can she doubt that? This is… this is the Yanagisawa she hasn't seen in years. Maybe he is really coming down from his delirium.
After all… if he was just trying to mess with her, there's… no way he would offer up an imperfect solution. He'd be telling her she could see Reaper again… that they could all be friends, but he's not. He's telling her that she'll have to kill, and somehow that's the best thing she's heard in months!
"I'll do it. Anything you say... I'll do it." Her voice is practically a sputter. "I'd… I'd be honored to help out! Thank you so much, Kotaro!"
She's so happy she could cry. Of course… she won't actually have any part in killing The Reaper, but this is her out! All she has to do is pretend for a little while longer and then she'll be free! She can finally see the light!
And all she had to do was wait for a shred of kindness!
Unconsciously, her right arm is twitching. She blinks back tears and gives him a grin. "Thank you. Thank you. Thank you."
It feels stupid to say to the guy who's been keeping her here all this time… but it's something! If she doesn't want then she'll never have to see him again after this. She's going to be okay!
"Of course," Yanagisawa says with another smile. "Now why don't you let me get you out of those cramped restraints? All I need is onneeee second."
He crouches to fiddle around with something on the side of the operating table… buttons or whatever. Aguri squints as he does. She's not sure why, but there's a weird smell to him. Nevertheless, she quickly shrugs it off. There are much more important things for her to be focusing on right now. And speaking of… her restraints pop right off.
She takes a deep, raggedy breath… sits up, and slides her legs off of the operating table. It's before she can step to the ground, however, that Yanagisawa holds an inviting hand out.
"Allow me to give you a hand," he insists. "Your muscles must be atrophied after so much disuse."
She reaches out to take his hand without a second thought. His smile looks genuine enough, after all. But it's only after she reaches out to clutch it that it suddenly looks sharklike.
And that's when her hand explodes.
Aguri lets out a cry as pain rockets outward from her palm. Reeling back, she attempts to pull away from Yanagisawa, but it's no use. His grip's iron, and her legs feel weak.
"W- what are you doing!?" She cries, giving her hand another tug. "That hurts!"
There's blood dribbling down her arm. Yanagisawa observes it curiously, before pulling her back in. Aguri's mind starts to race. She really wants to believe this is a simple misunderstanding, but-
I thought you were letting me go!"
She chokes on the words… stares at him with teary eyes, and lets out another shout.
"I'm afraid not, Yukimura," Yanagisawa chides. "I simply wanted to get a better look at-"
She doesn't let him finish. She can't possibly. Instead… she pulls away with all of her might… kicking backwards wildly, and making a mad dash towards the door. She manages to get her good hand clutched around the handle… but it's no use. The glass is up now, and Yanagisawa's gloves leave blistering red marks on her skin. He pulls her back by her hair and grabs the back of her neck, then slams her, full force, back down onto the operating table. One by one, he redoes her restraints.
She attempts to fight him off… kicks at his face and screams, but there's nothing she can do. Her body is atrophied… her muscles feel weak… and one after the other he manages to return her to her prison.
"What's going on!?" She screams, tears spilling down her cheeks. "I thought you were going to-!"
"'Let you go?'" Yanagisawa finishes, his voice a mocking falsetto. "Don't tell me you seriously believed that!"
Aguri sputters for breath, letting out little raggedy sobs. She stares up at him with wide eyes.
"And here I was thinking you were smarter than that. Perhaps I overestimated your competence." Yanagisawa smiles. "No, the plan was never to let you out of here. I simply had to make sure your body was absorbing the Antimatter properly. That.. and test out if my new Anti-sensei fabric was working." He puts his cowl up over his head. "What do you think?"
"What do I… what do I-?" Aguri sputters, before shaking her head. "You need to listen to me, Kotaro!"
"I believe you're not in the position to be giving me orders right now," Yanagisawa says. "Now answer my question: Does it hurt?"
Aguri bites down on her lip as he wraps his hand 'round her arm… but she can hardly hold her shout in for long. Sure enough, the material burns her skin… and even if she doesn't give Yanagisawa a 'yes,' an 'ow' seems to be enough.
He gives her a nod.
"Good. That means you're progressing nicely." He pauses. "That… and that I can utilize this to kill the Reaper. Good, good. It's all coming together."
Aguri lets out a whimper. While she's relieved to her that her companion is still alive… things aren't looking good for him, are they?
(...Things aren't looking good for either of them.)
Yanagisawa must notice the disheartened expression on her face, because he turns and lets out a chuckle.
"Don't look that way yet," he chides. "You've hardly seen anything. Seeing as how the development was a success… I fully intend to reinforce this room with Anti-sensei material. You won't be making an escape like your predecessor. And so frown over that, why don't you? You're never leaving here. Really, if you thought anything else, then you should just blame yourself for getting your hopes up. Ever the stupid one, weren't you, Yukimura?"
He reaches out for the door handle... cracks it open, and sticks a leg outside.
"I've got to go. There are much more important things to be studying at the moment. But remember this reminder, won't you? And… thank you for the assistance."
He slams the door before she can respond. Steps outside in the way she so desperately wishes she could and leaves her alone. She stares at that door for what feels like forever… her lip quivering and her hands starting to shake. But no matter how hard she cries she doesn't feel any better.
...Why had she seriously thought that was a possibility? She's been here for, like, a month, and she thought he was just going to let her go!? What a joke!
She just… what else was she supposed to do? Even if it sounded too good to be true it was all she had! Was there really something so wrong with believing that for just a minute?
Auuuughhhhhhh! She should have just made a run for it the moment he undid her restraints! But she got her hopes up of doing this on his terms… and of course he was screwing with her. He would have given her more details before ever letting her go.
(...He wouldn't have let her go at all. Who is she kidding?)
It's harder now than ever to breathe. Hyperventilating and shutting her eyes tight she trembles like a leaf… calls herself stupid over and over again and tries, desperately to ignore the pain radiating from her palm… from her forearm... from the back of her neck.
Her hand, in particular, isn't looking good. She doesn't know how to describe it… but it's melted, somewhat. Discolored skin sloughs off and mixes with blood… dripping down onto the floor. It looks like her body is attempting to mend the wound, but it's no use. She's simply still too human.
(Or too… not.)
Reaper displayed superhuman healing abilities near the end there. But she supposes she's not like him. It's not like all of her genes have come anywhere close to being replaced yet. And as such… her hand simply continues to ache: a disgusting display and a punishment for having the audacity to trust all at once.
She's really mad at herself. Seriously… she should have just run! But she was scared of something happening to Akari if she did. And besides… is there really something so bad about wanting to believe that this could have worked itself out on it's own? Is there really something so bad about wanting to see the best in people?
...Of course there is. She'd have to be stupid to think otherwise. But she swears Yanagisawa's been okay to her before. Was that real? Did she simply use up all his patience? Or have those brief moments of kindness been like this sleight of hand… nothing more than a magic trick?
A few months ago Reaper asked her why she stayed. Aguri, looking up from her paperwork, asked what he meant.
"I mean… I don't get why you just sit and take it. Why don't you just leave that person?"
"Well…" Aguri'd said, biting her lip. "I don't have much of a choice. It was an arranged marriage, you know."
"And you can still break it off."
"...Not really. My dad would get super upset," Aguri'd explained. "Our family was in a really bad financial situation before Yanagisawa… but he saved our company, and I had to thank him for that… otherwise he was going to go." She frowned. "If he'd done that, we'd have had to start relying on my baby sister for money. And she was way too young for that. There's no way I could have put her through that."
"And besides… it's not all bad!" She'd tacked on with a bright smile. "Yanagisawa's really not as bad as he looks. Sure… I'm not attracted to him, and I don't really want to be in a relationship, but he's not a bad person. He just has… issues. That doesn't make him any less successful or smart. I'm sure he's got a good heart somewhere deep down. I just need to find it."
'Well… you failed at that,' she thinks, staring up at the tiled ceiling. 'Either there was nothing in there at all, or you failed to uncover it. I suppose it doesn't matter much either way. This is your life now.'
She blinks back tears. She just wanted to make him happy. That's all she wanted to do… she just wanted to make everyone happy, and she couldn't even accomplish that. What kind of screw-up is she!? Forget making people happy! She can't even go without making people mad.
...Maybe she deserves this. She's not sure, but she does know one thing:
Yanagisawa certainly believes she does. He said he did this to her to test out two things... but he could have checked both by just grabbing her arm. He didn't have to tell her he was going to let her go. He just wanted to get her hopes up. That was the reminder he was talking about. This didn't have anything to do with those strange cloaks or her deformed hand… not really.
This was all about giving her hope, only to tear it away.
Aguri doesn't forget what that feels like… not for a very long time.
A few days later, it bursts from her skin.
Nothing feels particularly abnormal beforehand… at least not in comparison to what she's grown used to. She's simply staring up at the ceiling, eyes glazed over and muscles twitching, when an abrupt pain runs up her arm.
Before she can even fully process it there's a ripping sound… the scent of blood and something rupturing forth from her skin. She lets out a yelp, and stares- instantly, at the offending limb.
What she sees makes her freeze.
There… protruding from the inside of her arm, is something thin and fleshy. Undeniably weak, but resembling something she's seen before nevertheless...
A tentacle: pale grey and twitching… thankful, somehow, to finally be free.
Almost instantly he's on her: confirming her suspicion that she's being watched even when he's not there in the adjacent room. Yanagisawa presses his face to the glass… simultaneously bewildered and ecstatic, before stepping inside.
He makes his way over to her and undoes the restraint on just that one arm. He grabs it roughly before she can possibly resist, and wrenches it his way. He doesn't have his 'Anti-sensei' gloves on this time, but it still hurts a surprising amount.
"Fascinating…" he says. "And so my hypothesis was correct: something is surely different about the way you're developing. Reaper didn't display any changes like this until he was nearly seven months in." He pauses, staring at her with a hungry gaze. "But what could it possibly mean? Is it a result of the changes… or…-?" He shakes his head. "No. It's definitely an effect of your emotional aptitude. Amplified by negative stimuli… or…?" He drifts off. "I'll have to investigate this further. For now…-"
He scrambles for his tools… reaches out for a scalpel. That, and some sort of green instrument.
He makes a cut at the tentacle first… smirks when Aguri flinches back.
"Lacerates like human skin," he notes. "Perhaps slightly more fragile." He pauses. "There appears to be muscle inside, but it takes on a strange appearance. Bleeds significantly less than the arm would."
"And then… let's see," he continues. "Reaction to Anti-sensei material?"
He presses the back of the green instrument to the tip of the appendage. On contact it combusts… strange goo exploding in his face.
Yanagisawa wipes it off with a tsk.
"Similar reaction. Appears to be made completely out of Antimatter. Much more receptive than the hand or skin were, but both still destruct." He turns to Aguri, an analytical look on his face. "Does it hurt?"
Aguri doesn't respond. She's too busy staring at the tentacle blossoming from her arm. It's half the length it was before now… and the end looks mutilated, but she can still feel it wriggling as it moves.
'This is a part of my body now,' she thinks. 'It's extending from my muscle. This is my body.'
She feels half ready to throw up.
"Yukimura," Yanagisawa repeats. "Does it hurt to cut?"
"Uh… yes-" she finally replies. "Both the incision and the 'Anti-sensei material' hurt."
"Good," Yanagisawa says, letting out a low hum. "That's what I like to hear."
He stands up straight.
"I won't be locking up the tentacle for now… I'd like to observe it further. But I expect you to behave, Yukimura. Don't utilize this as a method of escape or mischief. Not only should you know your place by now, but I know you wouldn't want anything to happen to your family."
He turns. "Expect further similar changes in the future. The mutations will most likely accelerate from here." He gives a smirk. "Fitting… isn't it? That you're finally turning into the kind of disgusting person you are deep down?"
He doesn't wait for an answer… simply trods over to the door, opens it, and slams it behind him. He's not particularly interested in what Aguri has to say, and besides, she has a feeling he knows the answer anyways.
She lets out a shallow breath as he makes his exit. He's still inevitably watching her through the camera, but it's nice not to hear his voice.
...It's nice to be left alone with her thoughts.
She briefly considers using the tentacle to try and reach the apparatus on the side of the operating table… but that thought dies quickly. What's the use? He's right… there's no way someone like her could get out of here on her own. And even if she did somehow miraculously manage to press the right button she'd still be here alone in this room. She doesn't have a way to break out of that… not with one measly tentacle.
It's not worth risking her or her sister's or Reaper's safety. Like always, it seems she just has to 'sit down and take it.'
...Why does the thought make her heart hurt so much?
The tentacle writhes wildly as the rest of her sits there still… staring up at the ceiling. It's a disgusting sensation, but all the same she wonders what it means.
She remembers telling Reaper that his own tentacles must have been saying what it was he really felt… what he was too afraid to get across. But when you're always afraid… well-
Aguri's not sure what it is you can't just show on your face.
