The next week somehow feels like an eternity and an instant all at once.
That's right. A week. Aguri hadn't expected it either.
She thinks in the middle of processing all of this she'd still been in denial somehow- convinced that Yanagisawa was going to come back for her or that the government was going to hand her over. But as the days drag by that uncertainty fades some… and she realizes that this is her life now. It's… over. At least for a little bit.
That's relieving and terrifying all at once... and her days are hazy. It's in bed, out of bed. To school, from school. Talking to Korosensei. Then to Akari. To the students? Sometimes. She spends more time than she'd expected staring into the mirror… and less time than she'd expected being able to sleep. Nights are the hardest. She doesn't like lying down.
Sometimes she dreams. Sometimes she doesn't. They're never good.
She doesn't dream about what things were like before all of this. It's all now. She's pinned to the table… or she's out of there, but she can barely stand. Everyone's staring at her, and he's yelling.
One night she wakes up hyperventilating.
She doesn't tell Korosensei. He's too sound asleep. He doesn't rest enough, she thinks. He spends too much of the day doting over her… and when he's not glued to her side he's occupied with the students.
...Things are weird between them.
He's simultaneously so supportive and distant all at once. He's kind and patient… and he helps her with everything. He's teaching her how to maneuver her new body… to write again, and to run. But all the same, there's a forced sort of insincerity to it. A distance. He looks at her like he pities her.
And… it doesn't feel like it did back at the lab.
She remembers it so clearly; the way they talked to each other. It was all she had to cling to, and she drowned in that fantasy for months. She dreamed of flinging herself into his arms… returning to right where they left off. But… they haven't. Things are different now, and he's careful not to close the gap.
She knows it's because of what she did that first night. And… she regrets it. But all the same, it breaks her heart. She'd been so certain thinking about it strapped to that operating table that he'd felt the same for her. And the thought that he didn't is agonizing. Although… not nearly as much as the thought that he just doesn't now.
('What if? What if he did see you in that way? And Yanagisawa destroyed it? Can he even bear to look at you? Or does he think you're horrific?'
She's too scared to ask.)
He's less brutally honest. There's no snark. No familiarity. He's a little too kind. A little too gentle... and there's a pain behind his eyes. She knows her heart isn't the only one breaking. Seeing her like this is destroying him from the inside out. And it makes her feel terribly guilty in turn.
'I'm sorry,' she thinks. 'I'm sorry I'm not getting better faster. But I'm trying, alright? And I… I…
I really don't want to let you down.'
Her relationship with the students is weird as well. She's still terrified of distracting them… and because of that she doesn't teach. She talks to them in their offtime, though, and slowly starts to remember little things about them. She re-learns their names, their hobbies… and they do, in part, seem happy to see her.
All the same, she can tell they're forcing themselves as well. Their smiles are a little too hollow… their words a little too strained. They look at her with frightened eyes, and that uncertainty carries over to their future.
'What's going to happen to the classroom now?'
The government's official statement is that they're to kill her, but the effort is hardly heartfelt. She doesn't dodge like Korosensei does. They try once, but she just sits there in the back of class… the bullets bouncing off of her skin. And it's no fun to fight against something that won't fight back.
She hopes she's not ruining their fun. She tells them she's just hardly used to this sort of atmosphere. The kids half-heartedly murmur that it's alright. They say that they wouldn't want to do this, anyways.
Karasuma frowns and takes notes.
Some of them even grow half-hearted in regards to killing Korosensei. He tries his best to pump them up, but things are 'different,' now… or at least, so the students say. He seems so enthusiastic trying to find new ways to make this fun for them. It's weird to Aguri. The thought of him dying makes her want to curl up and cry. Why is he so eager to bring that onto himself? Is he… thinking the same as her?
(No. He's probably just trying to make this easier on them. He's going to die either way, after all. But he's not suicidal. He's not.)
A few of the kids apologize to her. Say, awkwardly, that they were mean to her back when she was their teacher and that they regret it. Aguri says that it's okay. Quite frankly, she barely even remembers it. Still, they look rather guilty. She wishes there was a way to let them know that this wasn't their fault.
(She brought this on herself, after all. But how else are they supposed to react? They're watching an adult they knew fall apart in front of them
...Maybe they'd feel better if she just hadn't come back here at all.)
She tries her best to get to know the other teachers. Both because Korosensei encourages it and because it's less awkward than talking with the students. Karasuma's still cold, and it's clear he doesn't like her… but she tries her best not to let it get to her. The students clearly love him, and so she's sure he's nice deep down. He's just… distant. And Korosensei reassures her that he's like that with everyone.
Aguri's not sure that's true... there's a certain stiffness reserved specifically for her. But all the same, she can't exactly blame him for being uncomfortable with her being around… and she makes sure to say good morning to him each day anyways. She's not sure he hears that a lot. And she'd like to try her best to try and stay nice.
...He doesn't tend to respond much beyond a curt 'you too.'
The other teacher- Miss Irina Jelavic- is much more talkative. Although Aguri's still not sure what it is she's doing here. Korosensei tells her that she's an English teacher, but her methods- again, are unconventional. It seems like she doesn't have a PHD… and when asked about her credentials she's irritable and snappy. She says that she's simply here on the 'government's terms...' whatever that means.
Aguri doesn't think she's a government employee. She wasn't let in on the same information as Karasuma. And besides… she's way too informal! She uses crass language and makes sexual remarks all throughout class. There's no way the government would hire someone like that… right?
(She looks maybe 20 at the oldest. She can't be that much more mature compared to the students.)
Aguri asks them one day what exactly Irina is doing around. She says she means no disrespect- that she's just… confused. She's not really a teacher, is she?
"Well… I guess not," Okano replies, scratching at the back of her neck. "Asano-sensei just required her to take up the role for her to come here. It's more of an obligation than anything."
"Come… here?" Aguri asks. "Why did she come here, though?"
"Assassination business," Sugino clarifies with a frown. "They brought her in to kill Korosensei. She's apparently some top-notch professional."
"Yeah! And a seductress assassin at that," Okajima squeals. "When she's not being a huge bitch it's actually sort of a treat. She's hot stuff, you know."
"Kind of a weird person to send to a middle school now that I think about it," Takebayashi admits. "But even I won't deny that it's a treat. She's quite curvaceous, after all."
"Cut that out, will you!?" Okano demands, slapping him across the back of the head. "Stop being a creep!"
"I'm not! I'm not! And hit Okajima, not me!"
Aguri frowns. Seductress assassin? What does that even mean? She's never heard of anything like that before.
...Now that she thinks about it she guesses she does remember Reaper talking about going on similar missions: seducing and taking out high-level political figures or whatever. But does that mean-
"Seductress?" she asks. "You mean for Korosensei?"
"Yeah," Hazama says, rolling her eyes. "Ridiculous, isn't it? I don't know how they ever thought that would pan out."
"It was super funny though," Okajima replies. "He was like- head over heels for her! Drooling and everything! 'Please! Please, ma'am! Tits in my mouth! I'm begging you!'"
"Like you're much better," Nakamura snarks, letting out a low laugh. "I've gotta admit that you're right it's funny, though. He acted nuts."
"I almost felt bad for her," Sugino admits. "Imagine having that guy all over you. Scary stuff." He glances Aguri's way, frowns. "Not that that's counting you, of course- he's just… he's silly, you know?"
He tries to backtrack, but Aguri's already somewhere else. She stares off into space as they talk about Korosensei falling head over heels for this woman. And suddenly… her head starts to spin. W- what? He never acted that way around her.
They must notice her looking down, because they reassure that it fell through, obviously.
"She failed to kill him like everyone else," Okano says. "And after that she just kind of… stuck around. I'm not really sure why… we already know her gimmick, but we're not gonna kick her out or anything, I mean."
"Yeah," Sugino says. "She can be pretty nice sometimes."
"And funny, at that!"
It's already too late. Aguri's mind is racing. And suddenly as she watches Irina make her way throughout the day she sees something she didn't see before.
A threat.
And not in the way that Yanagisawa or Karasuma are. No. Something much, much more insidious... and in its own way, infinitely more scary.
She thinks they're in love.
She can see it in everything they do. Irina struts into class confident and classy... and Korosensei's gaze drifts her way. She remembers what the students said about him being 'head over heels' and suddenly it's all clear. That's why he turned her down. It's not that he was worried about her! It's that his heart belonged to someone else.
The thought makes her sick. Although it just as quickly makes her mad at herself. He doesn't owe her anything. And she should just be happy that he's happy. But… why didn't he tell her? And did he seriously move on that quickly? She thought they had something special.
(They're in the lab and he looks at her with curious eyes. He doesn't look at her that way anymore. He averts his gaze... and they lie feet apart in bed.
She can't tell if the thought of him not caring now or not even caring then, hurts worse.)
She tries to tell herself that Korosensei is too nice to pull off anything like that… but her conviction wavers. She starts to notice strangely perverted behaviors, and what once was cute soon becomes less so.
It's not even a day later that she asks Irina if they can talk.
"There's… um- something that's been bothering me… and I was wondering if we could talk about it one on one. Girl to girl?"
Irina cocks an eyebrow- surprised, but gives a shrug. "I don't see why not," she says, turning on her heels. "Follow me. Let's go out to the sex shed. No-one will bother us there."
Aguri frowns, disturbed by her crudeness, but follows anyway. She wonders how it is that Korosensei could be attracted to a person like this. She's… a little mean, isn't she? And that's not getting started on the way she behaves. Is Irina seriously better than her? Or…-?
('No. That's not even a question,' she thinks. 'Of course she is.' Sure… she's rude, but that's no reason to judge. And even more importantly, Irina has something that she doesn't:
Appeal.)
It's not just her beautiful blonde hair or the way she keeps her fingers perfectly manicured. It's the way she carries herself: assertive… attractive. Irina knows exactly what she's worth, and she is not afraid to wield that against others. Aguri, meanwhile…-
Well, she's nothing like Irina.
She feels those pangs of jealousy as she trails after the other woman… and feels her stomach do somersaults. Suddenly she's starting to regret asking to talk to this person at all, but it's too late to back out now.
Irina makes her way into the (distinctly unsexy) shed and lights a cigarette as she steps inside. She apologizes- saying she's been trying 'get off of this shit, lately,' but that the situation is 'too batshit not to.' She needs to take the edge off.
Aguri frowns, but gives a polite nod. Irina has a point… she can't particularly blame her for being stressed. And it's not like she notices the smell much anyways.
She feels a little lightheaded standing there alone with Irina… but then again she supposes that's the norm as of late. No matter how much she eats or how much water she drinks there's a throbbing migraine she's been unable to shake, and her stomach feels weak. She's lethargic... tired. She asked Korosensei about it, but he'd said that would probably be the norm, at least for a little while.
'Your body is consuming a lot of energy, you know.'
(Aguri glances down at her malformed legs.)
...Yeah. She knows alright.
Irina pops open the window… leaning out and glancing back over her shoulder to lock eyes with Aguri. "And so what the hell did you want?" She asks, skeptical. "I've got a pretty packed schedule, you know. This better be important."
"Well, um… I'm new to the class… yeah?" Aguri asks. "Or at least- being back. And I couldn't help notice that you fill a pretty different role from everyone else. You don't have a teaching degree and I was curious about that, so I asked the students." She pauses. "Is it true that you're some sort of… seductress assassin? Or were they just messing with me?"
Irina's quiet for a long moment… taking in a deep breath of her cigarette. Finally, she sits up and turns around fully. She looks at Aguri with bewildered, unimpressed eyes.
"Are you stupid?" She asks, scoffing. "Don't tell me it seriously took you that long to pick up on that."
Aguri grimaces, face flushing blue. Taking a step back, she opens her mouth to speak, but Irina beats her to it.
"Yes," she says. "I'm an assassin. Why? Do you have some sort of problem with that? You said it yourself that it's been a very long time since you were in this classroom. Things have changed around here. There is a world-threatening octopus to deal with. The government called me in to take him out." She frowns. "Don't tell me that's seriously phasing you when there's a bunch of kids with shotguns."
"Well… no," Aguri replies, fiddling with her hands. Reaper was an assassin, after all. It's more of… um- the other thing that's getting to her.
"I was actually wondering about the seductress part."
Irina pauses again… recognition dawning in her eyes. Lowering her cigarette, she shakes her head.
"Oh god. Is that what you're worked up about?" She asks, dismissive. "Don't worry. I wasn't planning to come onto you. I do not get paid enough to whip my tits out for women I don't even know will fall for it. And it's clear you know my gimmick, anyways. That kind of defeats the point."
"I'm still under direct orders to kill you, of course," she continues. "But don't worry: the evil seductress isn't going to fling herself at you."
"P-pardon!?" Aguri asks, face flushing red. "N- no! That's hardly the problem! I wasn't worried about - gosh! I didn't even think of that! I was way more concerned about the two of you! Is it true you seduced him!?"
Irina pauses… letting it sink in for real this time. She cocks her head, concerned. "Who? You mean the octopus?"
"Yes, 'the octopus!'" Aguri replies, covering her face with her hands. "Korosensei! I didn't mean to gossip… but I asked the kids about what you did for a living and they told me that you were brought in to flirt with him. Is… is that true? Are you… you know, or-?"
She drifts off… ashamed. She feels silly even saying it, but that's what she came here to talk about, isn't it? She can't beat around the bush any further. She has to know if they're an item.
(If they're in love.)
Irina's nose wrinkles. Stunned, she asks "'You know?' You mean... fucking? Christ, no. I'm not a prostitute. I make baby eyes at some guy and then leave him dead in a back alleyway. It's not anything more than that." She rolls her eyes. "I don't think I could have sex with that thing even if my life depended on it. Why? Do you seriously care?"
"Well… um- maybe a little," Aguri admits. "I don't mean to pry, but...-"
Her gaze drifts downwards.
"Oh," Irina says. "Oh. I get it now," she grimaces. "You're jealous. I'd almost be disgusted if that weren't so fucking funny." She shakes her head. "No. No. I'm not attracted to the octopus. In fact, I'm a little offended by the notion. What sort of low-brow, low-standards sort of person do you think I am?"
Aguri just now realizes that she'd been holding her breath. She lets out a sigh… relaxing, slightly, at Irina's words. At least until she remembers what they imply.
'I'm not attracted to the octopus,' she says… but-
"What about him to you?"
Irina blinks. "'Scuse me?"
"You don't have feelings for him, you say," Aguri explains. "But what about-? I mean… how does he feel about you? The kids said he acted pretty bewitched. Something about- putting things he shouldn't put in his mouth in his mouth? I don't know." She shakes her head. "But they also said that… you failed to kill him? Uh- obviously? How did that go? Was it some kind of failed attack, or did he just finally see through you and turn you down?"
Aguri stares, desperately, down at Irina. She shifts from tentacle to tentacle, trying her best not to seem nervous... all the same, however, her hands start to shake.
Irina's expression shifts slowly. Going from annoyed to something closer to dubious, she turns on her feet and leans out the window once more. She takes a longggg breath of smoke… quiet, as she stares out over the field.
"You are, like… pitifully insecure," she comments, unimpressed. "'See through me and turn me down?' Seriously? What sort of savant do you think this guy is?"
"Well… I didn't mean that as an insult-"
"And I didn't take it as one. I know what I am. But you are putting way too much faith in men." Irina scoffs. "Did you seriously expect him to turn me down for you?"
Aguri pauses, frowning. 'Of course not,' she thinks. But still… hearing it said so bluntly: it stings a surprising amount.
"No, he didn't reject me. He drooled all over me until I dragged him out back insinuating we'd have sex, and he was thrilled the whole time. Only reason I didn't manage to kill him is 'cause I got stubborn and insisted on using lead bullets. If it weren't for that he'd be one dead, horny, motherfucker."
"Not that I'd take it personally, of course," she continues. "Yeah, sure… he was attracted to me at the start there, and he might even still be. What do I care? But that's no accomplishment. He's not exactly a difficult catch. The guy wants to stick his dick in everything that moves."
Aguri frowns, more than uneasy. Some part of her wants to stick up for Korosensei… but she remembers the way he looks at Irina with captivated eyes. Akari makes a comment about the porn stash he keeps hidden under his bed, and she hears whispers of the students almost being convinced he'd participated in a panty raid. How many times is it now that she's seen his face flush that signature pink? And have any of them been towards her?
'No,' she thinks. No. She's certain. He's an easy catch, alright. And he's attracted to everyone. Everyone except-
"...Except me."
Aguri's voice is a whisper. She's sure Irina can barely even hear her. Slowly… tears start to well in her eyes, and her breaths start to quicken.
Irina turns around, confused and unsure, she asks "Eh?"
"Except me," Aguri repeats, shaking. "He's a hopeless romantic… willing to look at everyone on the planet that way except for me. He fell for you- a woman he barely even knew- but he can't even bear to look at me anymore. What on earth is it that I'm doing wrong?! Is it my personality, or… or-?" She drifts off. "Is it something else?"
"Oh god…" she whispers, hands drifting up to cover her face. "Who am I even kidding? It's how I look. Though I'm sure it's my personality, too. Look at what Yanagisawa did to me. He made me into a- I'm just- no… he's right! It's what I always was. I can't even blame it on him. I can't believe I let myself think it was something different."
Before she even realizes it she's started to shake. It takes all her effort just to keep from crying.
"I can't believe I let myself convince me he'd ever think about me that way-" she says. "But it was just- it was all I had for so long! He was the first person to be nice to me! I thought that maybe… maybe- I don't know-" The dam collapses. Slowly but surely she starts to sniffle. "I thought that he at least cared back then! But he moved on so quickly. Did he hate me even before I became this?"
Sniffles escalate to hiccups. Hiccups escalate to sobs. She bats at her eyes... takes a step backwards. She can barely even hear Irina at this point.
"It's not like I could blame him," she continues. "I mean- why would someone ever choose me!? And it's not like- it's not like he had any other options. I was the only person he could interact with. Of course he convinced himself he cared about me. Now he's just seeing me for what I really am."
(She can hear it again and again in the back of her mind. She's strapped down to the table and Yanagisawa reminds her that Reaper never really cared about her. She tells him that he's wrong. He has to have. Reaper did care. If he didn't, then what is she even here for?
Yanagisawa's quiet for a long moment, lip twitching. But finally, he reminds her that even if he did care, he certainly won't anymore.
"After all, you've been ruined."
"I'm the only person who could ever love you now.")
She wants to curl up and die. Letting out breathless, ragged sobs, she presses herself back to the wall and collapses to the ground. She knows she's humiliating herself in front of this stranger, but try as she might, she can't even begin to regain her composure. Each time she tries she feels another wave of pure nausea rise up from her stomach and into her chest. She thinks that she's going to pass out.
"And I know that- I know that he doesn't owe me anything… but it just hurts- it just hurts so much! He was the only one who ever made me feel like I was special. Seeing him move on like that…" she weeps, caterwauling as she shakes her head. "I don't know what I'm going to do! I'm so scared."
"I'm sorry. I'm sorry," she repeats. "I'm probably scaring you. You should just go. I didn't mean to- I'm like - insulting you." Her breath quickens. "I'm just- I don't know what I'm gonna do now. I really thought that… I really thought that- maybe… it was- no. No! It wasn't- And now I'm going to-... oh god! I'M GONNA DIE ALL ALONE!"
(She doesn't want that! She doesn't want to think that she already has. )
She can hear Irina shuffling around faintly somewhere in the outer edge of her consciousness… but Aguri can barely make it out. Instead, utterly consumed by her own despair, she rocks herself back and forth and curls up tight. She knows she's acting ridiculous, but what else is she supposed to do!?
It just feels like it's been building up for so long! And this is the straw that broke the camel's back: another woman being better than her.
How could she ever expect anything else?
Yanagisawa told her from the beginning. He told her that she wouldn't be happy even if she got out. And so why didn't she believe him!? Why did she let herself leave!? Now she's here with a sister who doesn't recognize her! A set of students who are afraid of her! A Reaper who probably wishes she'd just stayed dead!
(And why didn't she!?)
She never asked for any of this! She never wanted to survive! She just wanted to die... there, in his embrace. Why couldn't she pretend, even just for a minute?
Why couldn't the illusion last?
She presses herself back up against the filthy shed wall… cradles her head and hangs her gaze low. She'd thought she left this sort of hurt behind a long time ago… but here it is yet again. What is that? Just more proof that she's weak?
She's still crying... mid-wail, when Irina's voice cuts through the air.
"Here," she says. "Just… take these already, alright? My arm's getting tired."
Slowly… Aguri's gaze drifts up. Still shaking, she swears she makes out something clutched in Irina's hand. Impatiently tapping her foot, she stares down at Aguri.
(It almost looks like she's holding…-)
"W… what?" Aguri whispers, voice raggedy. "Are those-?"
"Tissues," Irina interjects. "I keep some stashed in my pocket. And so accept my generosity already, will you? I can't stand to hear your bellyaching for another minute. I'm going to get fucking sick. "
She seems fed up… but when Aguri doesn't respond she crouches down low. She waves the set of tissues in front of her face, glowering.
"I'm sorry for making you cry or whatever, alright? I didn't mean to mock you. Don't get me wrong… I don't really care what you think of me, but if we're going to be working together for the rest of the year then I do not want to deal with this nonsense. It'd be stupid to make an enemy out of you. Buck up already. Seriously."
In any other situation… she'd perceive it as harsh. But somehow, despite the ringing in her ears, Aguri's gaze just keeps drifting back to that handful of tissues. And before she even knows what she's doing, she's collapsed into Irina's embrace.
She doesn't even reach out for the tissues. Simply wraps her arms around her shoulders and buries her face in her neck.
"Thank you," she says. "Thank you."
Irina tenses… clearly shocked. But before she can even speak Aguri says it again and again: that heartfelt, heart-rending thank you.
"...I think I really needed that."
Irina doesn't hug her back… just kind of sits there, shocked. All the same, though, she doesn't push the crying woman away. Simply says "You really are desperate, huh? That was kind of the bare minimum there, you know." She's quiet for a long moment. "...I think I can see why you ended up so worked up over this."
Slowly… she stands. Dragging Aguri to her feet with her, she passes over the tissues and then finally breaks away. Aguri whimpers slightly at the motion, but dabs at her eyes and whispers another thanks.
Irina doesn't respond. Just kind of watches… silent, as Aguri stares at the ground.
Finally, she speaks up.
"Listen. Don't- don't take it personally, alright? That was never my intent. I was just trying to insinuate that…- 'boys will be boys' or whatever,' you know?" Her nose wrinkles. She rolls her eyes. "Which is to say fucking shallow. I don't know why you're looking to that guy for validation, anyways. He's kind of a creep."
"I don't think that's true," Aguri responds, sniffling. "He's… a good person. And he means a lot to me. It's not his fault he reacted the way he did. I probably wouldn't be attracted to me either. I guess I just… put too much on his shoulders. Expected more than I was ever going to get. And that's something for me to take the blame for. Not him."
"Mmm," Irina responds, clearly unimpressed. Carefully, she looks Aguri over.
Her breaths have steadied some. She thinks she's still crying, but the hug helped. She hopes she hadn't freaked Irina out too much. She just gets… emotional sometimes.
"Do you want me to grab more of those?" Irina asks. "It might not be enough."
"No. It's fine," Aguri says, wiping her nose with her hand. "This is fine. I already appreciate it a lot."
"Okay, then. Just making sure."
Aguri blinks fast. Her head's started to pound, but it's not much of a new sensation. She doesn't even realize she'd been breathing heavy until Irina tells her to slow down.
"Just… count to sixty or whatever, alright? You don't want to spiral into another breakdown."
"Sixty?" Aguri asks, tilting her head. "That's pretty long. I don't think I've ever heard anyone instruct that before."
"Well I'm no fucking expert," Irina responds. "I'm just repeating what I've heard the octopus say. And you seem pretty damn on edge… so maybe you need the extra however-many seconds."
"Mmm," Aguri replies, looking down at Irina. It's funny. Despite the crass language, she's surprisingly sweet. She's still not looking directly at Aguri- trying to seem tough or whatever, but she can still spot the small glances she sends her way. She taps her foot… lets out another impatient huff.
Shutting her eyes, Aguri does as told.
'1… 2… 3...'
'60.'
And there it is. Some facsimile of calm washes over her once more. She knows it's just numbness deep down, but she still appreciates it in comparison to the alternative.
"I'm… feeling a bit better," she says, letting out a deep breath. "I'm sorry for freaking out in front of you. It must have felt pretty awkward."
"Eh," Irina says. "I expected something awkward from the minute you said you wanted to speak with me alone. I don't exactly do these 'one-on-one, girl-to-girl' talks well. 'specially when it comes to jealousy." Her lip curls. "I am the token bitch of the class, you know."
Aguri frowns. She'd been wondering about that. It's kind of weird that the students refer to her that way. Sure, Irina's unique, but…-
"I don't think you're a bitch at all."
Irina pauses, expression unreadable. Finally, she turns and says "Mmm. Thanks."
"I'm sorry if it felt like I was insulting you earlier," Aguri explains. "My issue isn't with you. Not really."
"Usually I'd ask 'with him?' but I've got a feeling that's not the answer," Irina responds. "With you?"
"Yeah," Aguri says. "Something like that."
Irina puts out her cigarette. Aguri stares. She hadn't even realized she'd still had it lit up until now.
"What are you going to do now?" Irina asks, leaning out the window. "You got some kind of plan?"
"For the rest of the day, you mean?" Aguri responds. "...I'll probably go back to class. I won't cry there. I've gotten it all out, I think."
Irina's quiet for a long moment. Scoffing, she says "No, I don't mean for the rest of the day. I mean for everything with the octopus. What are you going to do about your inferiority complex?"
"Oh," Aguri says. "I… don't even know." She frowns. "Just keep it all bottled in, I guess. Like I said: it's my issue to deal with. Not his."
"And so that's how you're going to spend your last year? Feeling like that? Sounds stupid to me."
"It's not-"
"Yes. It is." Irina turns back towards Aguri. "Listen… I don't believe in 'true love,' or whatever… this is probably going to end horribly. But if I were you I'd at least want answers before I bit the dust. An explanation for why he was treating me like such shit. You said it yourself earlier, right? 'What am I doing wrong?' The only person you're going to get an answer from is him. And so why don't you ask him?"
"Oh…" Aguri says, shaking her head. "I could never."
The thought makes her sick. Not only is it something she doesn't want Korosensei to have to deal with, but it's never something she could manage to voice on her own. And it's not like it really matters. She's spent her whole life feeling like this, anywa-
"Why don't you let me ask him for you, then?"
Aguri stares.
"Pardon?"
"I'm a seductress, right? It's what pissed you off so much in the first place. But I was thinking about it… and why don't we use that to our advantage? I think I found a way that we could use my skill set."
"Of course… it's not something I would usually do," she continues. "In fact, I think it's kind of fucking gross. But think of it as a favor or whatever, alright? Some kind of… peace offering for making you freak out. An olive branch."
"What is it?"
"An attempt to break his heart."
"W-what!?"
"Okay! Well, maybe not 'break his heart!'" Irina quickly clarifies. "But. To see his true colors! Find out if he really likes me or not." She pauses. "That's what you were so worried about… right? Because listen: I already know that the octopus is attracted to me. But in love with me? I sincerely fucking doubt that. And I think I can give you proof of it."
"I'm going to confess to him. Fabricate a story and tell him that I'm head over heels. I'm not sure if you've picked up on this already, but I can put on a good act... and it's been way too long since I've gotten up to some mischief." She gives a devilish grin. "Let me wrap him 'round my finger. And the minute he turns me down then you can-"
"Didn't you already do that?"
"...Eh?"
"Didn't you already… pretend to be into him?" Aguri asks, cocking her head. "If you're not being real about it then why would he fall for it this time?"
"Well first of all he's dumb as a sack of bricks," Irina says, rolling her eyes. "So write that down. And second of all... I think I can manage to frame it differently this time. I'll say I've fallen for him 'for real.' That… of course, I was just trying to manipulate him at first, but that after getting to know him I actually am now in love. It may sound ludicrous, but trust me when I say that these sorts of people tend to think with their dick. Once I throw myself all over him he'll believe me. Then it's just a question of whether or not he actually takes the bait."
Aguri's still not sure about that… but she supposes that Irina is the expert. She's a seductress assassin. She should know what she's talking about. And besides, who would dare doubt when someone like that put themselves up for offer? She knows she wouldn't be able to turn Irina down in Korosensei's shoes.
Which means… it's not a question of whether or not Irina can actually pull this off. It's a question of whether or not Aguri is willing to go along.
"Don't look so uncomfortable," Irina says, miming a gag. "Seriously... I'm not trying to steal your Area 51 reject. I just want to get you off my back. If he says no - and I have a feeling he will- then you can at least stop worrying about me. And if he says yes then I'll, like, pump him full of bullets or whatever."
"W-what!?" Aguri sputters. "What did you just say!?"
"Pump him full of bullets," Irina repeats, giving a nonchalant shrug. "This is the perfect opportunity for an assassination attempt. And if he really was willing to move on so quickly after you getting shiskabobbed then he probably deserves it. I can set up a trap and then-"
"Absolutely not!" Aguri shouts, staring. "I never said I wanted to hurt him! Where did you get that impression!?"
Irina frowns. Lip twitching, she says "Nowhere in particular. I just thought that if we had an opportunity we should utilize it."
"No. No. And he doesn't deserve it," Aguri argues, stubbornly shaking her head. "Korosensei has every right not to like me. I wouldn't really blame him, frankly. If this is… if this is making me feel bad then that's an issue for me to deal with, not one for him to suffer for. I don't want anything to happen to him. I just want to know the truth… and even that's pretty selfish. So don't you dare do anything to him on top of that." She pauses… drifts off. "Is that the only reason you offered to help me? As a chance to take him ou-?"
"No," Irina interjects. "Of… course not." She huffs. "I still think you're wasting a huge opportunity, and for that alone I'll call you stupid, but if you want then I'll go through with it- no assassination involved. At least… not during the confession. After we're done with our little scheme he's fair game again. Ya got it?"
Aguri does not 'got it,' but she knows she's not in a position to argue. As much as she hates to admit it Korosensei is still seen as a threat to the planet. She can't exactly blame Irina for her position. Especially not when she's still being so cooperative.
"And so what do you think?" Irina asks. "You down? Or are you going to sit here crying for the rest of the year? Whatever it is… I'm willing to offer my full cooperation."
Aguri pauses… thinking it over. Irina's attitude disturbs her to a certain extent- especially combined with her insistence on assassination. But all the same… she'd really like to know. What if this is her only chance?
Will it… hurt if Korosensei says yes to Irina? Thinking about it, Aguri doesn't think she could bear it. But even so… maybe that immediate heartbreak would manage to hurt less than the uncertainty. Does she even have a choice?
"...Yes," she says, voice a whisper. "I'll do it, I mean. I'd like to find out what he thinks about me." A pause. "...I'd like to find out if he's moved on."
It's only briefly that she thinks about how this will probably hurt him. About how he might just go through the same heartbreak she is right now when Irina inevitably turns his words on him. But there's no going back. And she has to know, whether it's selfish or not.
(She's always been a shitty person. She's not going to start pretending she's above accidentally hurting other people now.)
Irina looks genuinely surprised… almost as if she didn't expect Aguri to agree. But quickly her demeanor brightens and she gives a wicked grin. Snapping her fingers she says "Let's get to it, then. I'll return to class. And once school is out I'll set the scene. You watch from a distance, yeah?"
"We'll manage to find out what's really in this guy's heart. Mark my motherfucking words."
The rest of the day flies by a lot quicker than Aguri expects. Her and Irina return to class after lunch with no issue. Korosensei waves them over and Karasuma glances, briefly, up from his laptop. The students dive right into Home EC classes… and Aguri sits there in the back as they work. Needless to say, her mind wanders.
She's already kind of regretting this plan. She knows in a way that she's manipulating Korosensei… and that hurts her heart. He's still being so patient with her: nudging her, gently, to try and participate in class. Of course she turns him down... she doesn't want to distract the students, and there are certain subjects she'd rather not participate in, but all the same, he understands without so much as a complaint. Is that the person she's doubting cares about her?
('Yes,' she thinks, stubborn. 'Yes it is.' He's nice, but there's no taking these things at face value. She won't accept that kindness… especially not when every glance towards Irina sends her heart plummeting into her stomach.)
She has to get answers. And it wouldn't be fair to Irina, either, if she backed out now.
At the end of the day, she starts to leave with Korosensei and Akari by her side. Irina, on schedule, approaches and asks Korosensei if they can talk alone. Korosensei says that he'll be just one minute… and then makes his exit. He follows Irina out to behind the school, and Aguri watches, curious.
Akari asks Aguri if she wants to start heading home now- that she's sure Korosensei will catch up- but Aguri declines. She says she has something she remembered she needs to do, actually.
"Just… wait right here for a second, alright? I'll be right back."
And with that, she follows after the two of them
Irina gave her full permission to listen in. Admittedly it still feels a bit like eavesdropping, but Aguri wasn't sure that she could trust in this woman's word. She's… crafty. And there was no guaranteeing that she wouldn't either make things sound harsher for an ulterior motive or softer to spare Aguri's feelings. She'd like to see whatever goes down for herself.
She stays sidled to the side of the building. She can't spot Korosensei or Irina from where she is… but she can hear them just fine. And besides, that's proof that they won't see her, either. Good. Good. She'd hate to be caught.
"So then… what is it you wanted to talk about, Miss Irina?" Korosensei asks, curious. "It's not like you to want to talk to me like this one-on-one."
"Well…" Irina says, almost casually. "There was actually something I wanted to confess to you. But it's not something I wanted to risk the students overhearing. So keep it quiet, alright?"
"Of course," Korosensei replies. "What is it?"
Aguri glances over the corner and tries to get a look at Korosensei's face. She can't make it out… he's indistinct as ever. But Irina, somehow, looks small. Aguri's not sure what she expected in a seduction, but it wasn't this. She'd really meant it when she said she was going about this differently, hadn't she?
"Well… it sounds kind of embarrassing now that I'm actually saying it, but I've got to tell someone. Korosensei… you're the only one I could admit this to, but I think I've fallen in love!"
"In love!?" Korosensei asks, stunned.
"Yes! And with…- with- blegh! I can't believe I'm saying this, but with you!"
Aguri can tell that Irina's having fun playing up the character. Her shy demeanor- her syrupy words… they're all sorts of over the top. If she weren't in this exact situation right now she'd almost laugh.
This person really is good at what she does, huh?
Korosensei lets out this squeak sort of sound. Shocked, he says "With me!?"
"Yes!" Irina says, covering her face with her hands. "With you! I can't believe I'm saying it, either. But please… just hear me out." She leans in closer, pouts. "I know I've tricked you before. But what I'm about to say… it comes from the heart. And as such, I'd like you to know what's made me feel this way, even if you're going to turn me down."
Korosensei pales slightly, shivering at the almost-touch. Aguri leans in further… watching them intently. And Irina bats her eyes, giving him an innocent look. Korosensei scoots backwards slightly, giving a firm nod.
"...Very well then," he says. "Please, go on. I'd love to hear the full situation."
He's on edge… although Aguri can't tell if it's the good sort or the bad. Is he anxious? Upset? Or is he eager? Making sure he can truly believe those words before he leaps?
"As you know, Korosensei… I was sent here to seduce you," Irina whispers, stepping in closer. "And while at first it was an act… something surprising has happened as I've gotten to know you. I think that I've fallen for real."
"I know it's absurd…" she continues. "But to keep up the act I've had to learn every aspect of your personality... find out your likes and your dislikes. And underneath I've found a surprisingly alluring man. A person I think I could trust in."
She creeps in closer. Sidles from foot to foot.
"Of course… I used to think you were strange," she admits. "A laughable sort of obnoxious person. At best you were a piece of meat I could catch… some sort of far-off, unobtainable, target to wrap my finger around. But as you've continued to resist my temptations, I've only become all the more enamored. You're incredibly strong-willed, Korosensei."
"I've been seen as a piece of meat all my life too, you know," she murmurs, giving Korosensei a sorrowful look. "Of course… I've long since accepted that role. But the idea of being with a man who sees me as more than that… well, it's almost too alluring to resist."
She purrs as she slides her finger down Korosensei's cheek. Grinning, she says "And you are that man, aren't you? You seem like a degenerate at first… but I know the real you. And I know there's something more going on there under that demented facade."
"Not only are you a truly multi-talented man- I mean… just look at your past, but you're kind, too. Look at how you behave around the students. You're so nurturing with them! Who else could be capable of such things?"
And it's the truth. Aguri agrees full-heartedly. If there's anything that Korosensei is it's sweet. He's warm- wise- welcoming.
"And of course you're smart, too, on top of that," Irina continues. "I mean… so educated . What a leader you are, Korosensei."
And that as well! He was smart back then and he's even smarter now. Aguri remembers so many intellectual conversations… hours spent bantering over this concept or that.
"Alongside mysterious, of course," Irina says. "You're brooding, aren't you Korosensei? You don't tend to talk about yourself… and there's still so much I don't know about you."
At first that gives Aguri pause. She knows quite a bit about Korosensei. But then again she remembers that pretty much anything Reaper told her back then could have been a lie… and there are still elements of his past that she doesn't understand. No. Irina has a point. Mysterious is right. The elusive assassin. The superpowered beast. He's almost too mystifying to even comprehend.
"It comes with your stoicism, I suppose. You are responsible."
Wait. What?
Stoic? Now… she's not sure that's the word she'd use to describe him. Sure, he was a bit aloof back in the lab, but he's much more open now… and Irina never knew him back then, anyways.
Plus, what's this about responsibility?
Aguri's not sure she'd call him responsi- of course he's very admirable- don't get her wrong! But responsible!? He runs the Assassination Classroom! There are much more responsible people out there.
"And in a way, I appreciate that. Your distantness can make you respectful. That might not seem like a lot, but I treasure that more than I'd like to admit." A pause. "Being seen as something different for once."
Respectful… in what way? Aguri's brow furrows. Suddenly Irina seems to have gone off-script.
Of course she'd agree that Korosensei is respectful… but with regards to sex? He's… kind of not! That's why they're having this whole intervention in the first place. What is Irina talking about?
Thinking about it… what was that earlier!? About Korosensei not treating her like a piece of meat? He- he totally does! Are they even talking about the same person?
No. There's no way. They're not.
Suddenly, it hits Aguri.
It had come on so gradually that she hadn't even realized. But Irina's dramatism from the start of her confession has long since faded. Of course, she's still lying, but her tone has slipped into something much more genuine... and that over-the-topness is now just a shield to mask vulnerability. She sidles from foot to foot… staring up at Korosensei, and Aguri knows she means what she says.
But… she doesn't mean it towards him, does she? No. She's not describing him. And she'd been more than clear about her disgust. All the same, she means it somehow, and Aguri's mind wanders.
Where, exactly, is she drawing this fountain of inspiration from?
She's not given much time to dwell on it. Irina continues on just as planned.. looking even smaller than before.
"And that's why I had to tell you this," she admits, giving a long pause. "Of course… you don't have to accept- I don't really care. But I just thought I should let you know. That you... that you changed my life in that way." Her face flushes red. She gives an annoyed pout. "And so what is it? Are you interested? Or is that going to be a no?"
Korosensei's quiet for a long moment. And as he steps in closer to Irina Aguri feels her heart race. But ultimately he places a hand on her shoulder and sighs.
"Miss Irina… I'm deeply flattered, but I'm afraid I don't return those feelings towards you. As much as I hope that you can continue to feel that way in the future," he says awkwardly. "-Seen for who you are… many things have come to light recently, and…" he drifts off. "I'd like to think them over before I even consider getting into a relationship of any sort."
Irina wilts- faking disappointment. However, shaking her head, she says "I understand. You have a past with the new woman, right?"
Aguri freezes up. Completely unexpecting to have been mentioned, she feels her limbs lock. She's received some kind of the answer she wanted from Korosensei- but what is he going to say in response to her coming up? Is he going to mention what happened the other night? How he had turned her down too?
(Is he going to mention just how uncomfortable it made him?)
He's quiet for a bit… thinking. His face flushes pink- then that same shade of sorrowful blue. Turning, he says "Something like that."
"The… situation is complicated at the moment," he continues, starting to walk. "But… either way it's changed things for me. And whether or not the relationship is a possibility I've got to keep that in mind. It's very possible my heart will always belong to that person."
'That person,' Aguri thinks, clutching at the grass.
That's her.
And so… why did he turn her down, then? Did he really mean it… what he said about just being worried about her? Or is it that- is he-?
...Is he in love with the old her?
She doesn't know. But either way, her heart sinks. She feels terrible for listening in on this. She feels terrible for putting Korosensei through this at all. She shouldn't have doubted him. Of course he cares about her! He's been nothing but nice to her since the moment she got back.
What sort of person is she?
Irina follows after, asking "Oi. Where are you going? I don't think we're finished here."
"I believe it's time I get going. I apologize if I've left anything unanswered for you Irina, but I should return to Akari and Yukimura-san. They are probably waiting for me. And I've already taken much longer than I anticipated. I wouldn't want them to worry."
"At least…- at least promise me that you're not gonna tell anyone about what we talked about today, octopus! And I mean that! If word of this gets out to the students then I'll fucking kill you-"
"I can reassure you Irina," Korosensei says. "Nothing we shared will be exchanged with the students… or with anyone else." He pauses. Gives a mischievous grin. "Not that I think that matters much. It's rather obvious either way."
Irina's face flushes red. Seeming genuinely embarrassed for once she shakes her head and grumbles, "Fuck you." Nevertheless, she allows Korosensei to make his exit. And as he returns towards the front of the school Aguri rejoins Akari at the door.
The funny thing is… she almost believes she got away with it.
Korosensei doesn't comment on his conversation as he regroups with the two of them... simply gives a wave and says that he's ready to start heading back whenever they are. Aguri gives Irina a silent thanks as she starts to depart- promises to talk to her more later. Of course she doesn't say any of this aloud… and she really wishes she'd grabbed her phone number, but Irina seems to understand. She gives Aguri a thumbs up and a wink. A mischievous sort of 'you've got this.'
Now… Aguri's not really sure about that, but she's glad Irina had been willing to help her out at the very least.
The three of them don't talk much on the way home. Akari briefly brings up something she did with her classmates, but that's about it. Korosensei hums quietly, and Aguri wonders what his answer had meant… what he said to Irina. He told her that his heart would always belong to that person, but that's kind of complicated, isn't it?
(Should she be flattered? Or is she supposed to be hurt?)
When they arrive back at the house Korosensei asks her if she'd like to go for a walk. Aguri stares, asking "What?" but he simply responds that it's a beautiful day.
"I wouldn't want to put that kind of weather to waste. And besides… while Akari needs her rest, it's not too late for us to get some fresh air, at least."
...He doesn't directly say that he wants to talk.
Nevertheless, Aguri picks up on it. And glancing away, she asks if he's sure that that's a good idea.
"Are you… are you sure? We'll kind of stick out in public, I mean."
"You still haven't seen my disguise, have you?" Korosensei asks, giving a grin. "Don't worry about it. I have a feeling that we'll just be just fine."
His 'disguise' ends up boiling down to a ratty wig and a stick-on-nose. Aguri just about laughs when she sees it. She tells him that he can't be serious. There's no way that people won't notice that.
"No-one's noticed yet," Korosensei reassures. "People pay a lot less attention to others than you'd think, Yukimura."
They have to end up cobbling her own disguise together. Korosensei tells her that she doesn't need one- but she insists. She's not as inconspicuous as he seems to think… and besides, even if she were she still doesn't want to be seen. He seems sad, but understands... helps her pull an oversized hoodie up over her head and cover her malformed arms.
"Looking wonderful," he says with a smile. "Let's get going, then."
Aguri lets Akari know that she'll be gone for a bit. Akari seems hesitant- but lightens up some when she learns that Korosensei will be coming with. She asks if Aguri would like her along, too.
"I believe we'll be fine," Korosensei says. "While your company is very much appreciated… your leg still needs rest. And I believe there are some things that your sister and I should discuss."
Suddenly, Aguri feels like she's in trouble.
And her suspicions are confirmed when a few minutes into her walk Korosensei turns to her and stares at her with quiet eyes.
"Okay," he says. "Would you like to talk about what just happened? You were involved after all, weren't you?"
Seems she's not quite as inconspicuous as she'd thought, either.
