Chapter Fourteen
Horse Master
Cullen crawled into my tent the next morning an hour after Dawn. He wasn't wearing his armor when his arms came around me.
"Good Morning, Husband," I hummed at him.
"My beautiful wife… we need to have a talk, don't we?" he was smiling, so the anxiety that his words induced was lessened. I pouted, "Don't say it like that – Gods' Blood, the worst thing you can say to someone with insecurity is 'we need to talk'."
He frowned, "I can see your point. How about this; let's talk about Alistair."
I curled closer to him, "So talk; this is more your choice than mine since we already agreed that I'd be with Alistair for the foreseeable future – we just need to decide if that includes marriage or not. I mean… I sort of want to; I like Alistair and I don't want him forced to marry a woman he doesn't know and won't love him one wit passed what he can give to her. At least if I marry him, I know I can care for him and won't expect lavish gifts or anything. The cheese and the brady were half-jokes and had nothing to do with courting. I asked for the brandy in exchange for the tale about what happened and the cheese was so that I would pardon someone posing as a Warden rather than condemn them to the Wardens with what is currently happening…"
"Alistair… as I said, I don't mind him; though Blake makes me a bit uncomfortable and I don't think I could share you with anyone else… I don't mind Alistair. If you really want to marry Alistair… I won't stop you; but I demand equal time. You are my wife as well…"
"Actually – for at least the next year – you'll get more time with me than he will. I'm the leader of the Inquisition; even if I marry Alistair, I'll be spending most of my time taking care of that big ass hole in the sky."
He smiled, "Then I have no issues at all with you marrying him; you're still my wife at that point… and I won't lose you, right?"
"Not if I can help it. I love you, Cullen. I mean, we haven't known each other for long, but damn it, I love you and I am your wife. I plan to keep you even if the Landsmeet tries to dissolve our marriage to make me all Alistairs. I won't allow it! And damn it, one day I think I want your kids too, you know."
He kissed me – fiercely. "Makers' Breath, Celeste; I like the sound of that… I want a child one day… I think a little girl that looks just like you…"
"What? And if I want one that takes after you? Can't you just imagine a pretty little blonde girl with amber eyes? As it stands, just our status' will have us beating the suitors away with sticks."
He snorted, "I'm not all that good looking; but I do see your point. Maybe a boy then – less suitors that way."
"… Say that again after the Winter Ball. A man is going to get handsy with your bum, Cullen."
He flushed, "I still want kids – but they are hopefully going to be better versed on politics than I am."
I laughed as Varric poked his head in, "Hey, Waves – Dennet just arrived back."
"Come on, Cullen – now that we've made a choice, we should get moving…"
Varric perked up, "What did you decide?"
"Like I would tell you?" I quipped.
"Ah, come on waves – I need to know!"
"You pack my tent away and I'll tell you; but it's top secret," I smirked. He nodded and said, "Deal."
Cullen gave me a look, "Do this often?"
"When I'm feeling a little lazy, sure. I dangle a bit of desired information n front of Varric and have him do the thing I don't want to. It works with Solas and Maxwell too," I laughed as we came out of the tent.
Maxwell nodded, "Plays us like lutes. I wanted to know what Cassandras' favorite flower was and somehow, I ended up cooking dinner that night."
Cullen shook his head, "On that note – Celeste, my love… I am to ask if there is anything you want for your birthday; Leliana and Josephine think it is wise to throw you a welcome home party and have said it is also a bleated birth… Celeste?"
I was pale and shaking my head, "A welcome home, I can understand – but not a birthday… I don't celebrate my birthday; never again. I refuse."
His brows furrowed, "Even I celebrate… what exactly happened that you hate your birthday this much?"
"… Please – just… I don't want to celebrate that day. I never want to celebrate it again; it was never a happy day anyway. I was 'abandoned', no one really cares about orphans' birthdays except the 18th one where they get kicked out of the only home they've ever known, and then… please…"
He pulled me close – I was crying? I suppose it made sense considering all of the circumstances that made me hate that day.
"… Josephine is already sending out invitations, Celeste; is there something we should know?"
My lip quivered, "When I was 8, I was told that no one wanted me… and the fact that I had no friends and had been abandoned on the day I was born should be proof enough of that. When I was 16, I was asked on a date as a bloody joke on my birthday… then… Cullen, my birthday was the day that those men beat me until I lost… too many of my birthdays have been shitty to the point that I take the day off every year just to get drunk."
"Maker…" Varrics' voice sounded sick. Maxwell said, "I think I would hate my birthday too at that point."
Solas frowned, "Well… a birthday is just a day; like any other, I suppose."
The old wolf likely didn't celebrate his birthday either after so many.
"I… unfortunately, Lady Montilyet was already sending out the invitations when I left. I guess now we know why Blake was shouting at her to cancel it; Leliana er… detained him but he wouldn't say why he was so insistent – that it was your secret to tell. I'm sorry, Celeste…"
I shook my head, "You didn't know – maybe next time, they'll listen when Blake tries to talk though. I didn't want to tell anyone; technically, it didn't happen since I'm younger than… and we both know that I was… 'innocent'… I guess… I just – I want to hate my birthday in peace. I will never understand the total obsession people seem to have with birthdays."
Cassandra looked very guilty as she said, "I… I apologize. I voted for the celebration. Josephine was sure that it might boost morale and increase connections if we held a celebration for your return after 24 years and merged it with your birthday. Of all the Advisors, only Blake disagreed…"
Cullen, Cassandra, Leliana, Josie, Maxwell, Blake and I were all considered Advisors. Leliana handled the 'Secrets'; Josie took care of 'Connections', Cullen took care of 'Forces'; as expected. Cassandra was considered the advisor on 'Field'; Maxwell was the 'Mark' advisor; Blake was 'Training' and then I got 'Future'.
We all had our own 'pegs' too. The Raven for Leli; the Fist for Cullen; the two crossed keys for Josie; an open palm for Max; a shield for Cass; a Helm for Blake; and a 'sun' for me since people were talking about my visions – I wanted gun pegs, but Nooo.
I sighed, "Next time it's something concerning me, please listen to Blake. He's been with me for 24 years. We met around this age – bar fight; I won – and were friends for 20 years before getting pulled here. I… he is me – we covered that, right?"
Cullen was petting my hair, "We did. I'm sorry, Celeste. I just wanted to do something nice for you and when Lady Montilyet mentioned… Maker, I should have listened."
"What's done is done – just please… ignore my birthday from here on out?"
"Are you sure?" Solas asked.
I opened my mouth to confirm before sighing, "At least until I have a kid. I'll pretend to be normal for that so that I can spoil the kids, but before that…"
"Right – let's get Master Dennet… my reward for the tent?" Varric – bless his soul – directed the conversation away.
"Start bowing, Loremaster – I am the Queen."
"You mean that you will be?" Maxwell corrected.
"Nah – I'm going to introduce myself as Princess but we all know that I've always been a Queen; the Queen of kicking ass."
Cullen laughed, "That you are."
We began walking toward the farm house as I said, "So, I'm going to take Alistair up on the whole 'Marry Him' thing but only if he agrees to add in the Vows that Cullen will always be my first husband and as such if I have to divorce anyone for any reason, I will be leaving Alistair, not Cullen. This way, the nobles of Ferelden won't try to find a reason to dissolve my marriage to Cullen – because I'd have to be divorced from Alistair first. It's stupid, but I get the feeling that the nobles will totally try to ruin my marriage to Cullen so that I can straight up focus on having babies for Alistair only. Fuck that – I love Cullen; so while I plan to honor both men as my husbands, I need to protect all interested parties."
Cullen actually relaxed as he took my hand, "I appreciate it. I know that Alistair will also receive your love and attention – but I worried that the nobles would try something…"
Maxwell nodded, "Human nature for nobility – we want things to go our way, so we manipulate. If Celeste does as she says and Alistairs Vows include that he would be the first one dumped, then they'll walk on eggshells. They want her as their Queen so badly because she can have kids, then they need to bow to her whims. They've already jumped on the wagon for the demands just for her to sleep with the king – they better bow to the fact that she plans to keep you."
Solas smirked, "An interesting way to play the game, I will admit."
"You've seen enough of the game in the Fade to know that, haven't you? Tell me, Solas – what would you do in my situation?"
"I would refuse to marry the king – but then, I am not a lover of men." He chuckled.
"That's fair."
Ellana sniggered, "I don't do Shems."
"You would – you would totally do Cullen if he weren't taken and Solas wasn't interested in you." I said.
She shrugged, "He's cute enough, I suppose… I could make an exception…"
"No – he's mine," I said, "I was just making a point. I'll only share my men with each other or Blake. And Cullen already said he isn't interested in Blake."
"A happy little threesome then – what a killer love story. Orlais will like it even more if they think you two are being forced into the marriage with the King and that even the King is unwilling," Maxwell pointed out.
"Easy enough to play at – but I think they may like the scandal factor of me marrying two men no matter how it's played."
"True – Elissa having the Left Hand of the Divine as her consort was quite the scandal for the first two years. I remember Leliana fielding so many questions and I was just in Awe at her ability to play the game so well," Cassandra sighed.
We knocked on the door – Dennet answered. He was 5'11 with chocolate skin, grey-brown eyes, a bald head but white beard, mustache and eyebrows, and was looking at the Halla I had insisted come with us up toward the house.
He cleared his throat, "So, you're the inquisition, eh? Hear you're trying to bring back order; it's high time someone did. Never thought I'd see Halla involved though…"
I smiled, "They tend to follow me about. This is commander Cullen, Master Dennet – I understand your hand has locations marked for three watchtowers and your wife wants us to take care of some Demon Wolves before we can acquire any of your fine horses. It's a more than reasonable request and I am more than willing to do those things. I only ask that you look after the Halla while we do."
He looked completely thrown off and said, "I'd heard you had a vision in the Fade; don't think I believed it before, but Elaina said you only inquired about when I would be back when you came by yesterday. Alright, Inquisition; you take care of those two tasks and I'll provide horses. Those Halla are damn majestic beasts – I'd give my right-arm to ride one…"
"These will let you ride free of charge; go ahead – the one with the black horns actually likes being ridden and can hold up that lout," I pointed to maxwell and he gave a mocking bow.
I continued, "When this is done, I'd like it if you could actually join us in Haven or Skyhold. I'm of a mind that our mounts deserve the best care they can get."
He looked startled; first by the offer to ride a Halla and then by the recruitment as Cullen headed off toward Bron – the stable-hand – and he said, "I can't say I'm not tempted… still, it would feel wrong to abandon my land to go play horsemaster again."
I cave a coy smile, "Very well – I know someone that can call in favors with an Orlesian horsemaster easily enough."
He straightened, "The Orlesians? Hang that – no hopped-up Orlesian piss-boy knows more about horses than I do! All right – you win; never let it be said that Redcliffe gives less than the best – you get those watchtowers up and take care of the wolves, and I will look after your mounts myself."
"Thank you – we will be coming across horses from all over Thedas; Hearts and Dracolisk mounts will be with us too and I hope to get a bog unicorn, Avvarian War Nug, an Avvar Mixed Draft, a Light-Torn Steed, and even a Primal-Trained Longma. You're the best, and we need the best to care for such varied mounts."
Dennet looked over the moon, "Bog Unicorn? Avvar Mixed Draft? Why didn't you say so – I'll start packing things up here while you take care of the wolves. Looks like your commander has the Watchtowers well in hand."
"My husband likes making sure everything is done. Oh – I've been rude. I'm Celeste Rutherford, Princess of Ferelden, Admiral of the Inquisition, and Herald of Andraste. This is Lord Maxwell – the other Herald. Max – you, Varric and Solas go take care of the rifts around the Farm; there should be 2; one along the ravine and one over in the north. Ellana, Cass and I will go take care of the wolves in the northeast."
Cullen wandered back over while looking at a map, "Celeste; you said three watchtowers – Bron only has spots marked for two…"
I looked at the map and frowned, "The third one should be about in this area – we took out the rebel mage encampment at this spot and the cave makes a nice hide-out so… we certainly want to keep an eye on that; this pass is the easiest way to get there unseen. This area also overlooks the Broken Bridge near the Templar Encampment – we need to get that bridge fixed. Put a watchtower there anyway; I don't want bandits in that cave when we go to collect Pre-Andrastian treasures."
He nodded, "As you say, my love. Dennet, it was good to see you again."
"Aye – I hear you're a prince now?"
"That's the current rumor; all because my wife is being pressed to marry the King. What has the world come to?" he quipped.
Dennet laughed, "Sounds about right – though with her being married to you…"
"Not even – one of the people in the Landsmeet discovered that there is nothing on monogamy in the Chant of Light or the Tenants of Faith. Alistairs' marriage to my sister was dissolved and now he is being pressured to court and marry me. Titles for Cullen are being discussed at length as the first man to be married into royalty but not royal himself. If I had to guess, he will be 'Prince-Consort' since he'll be married to the Queen if or when I marry Alistair."
Dennet blinked, "Are you going to?"
"Cullen and I discussed that and… I suppose I am. It's better for the stability of the throne if I marry him knowing that I am capable of having kids and politically, it's a good move too. I head the Inquisition; we need the support of Ferelden more than just being Princess would net me. And as for Alistair, he'd net the security of a wife that can bare him an heir, the prestige of marrying a Herald of Andraste and the long-lost Cousland, and he'd also be able to reassure the Landsmeet that the Queen isn't trying to start a rebellion against her own people when I have to capture a keep in Crestwood in the name of the Inquisition after I oust bandits. However, if I marry Alistair, then we need someone prominent in our order to marry an Orlesian to keep the peace. We're considered an Orlesian movement, but headed by a born Ferelden and a man from Ostwick; our advisors are Orlesian, Nevarran, Antivan, Marcher and Ferelden; we are currently based in Ferelden; and this isn't mentioning that – for the most part – our forces are Ferelden."
Maxwell held up his hands in wide-eyed surrender, "Not me – I plan to court Cassandra! Make Blake marry someone!"
I sighed, "That will be his choice – I don't plan to force anyone and we may skate by with recruiting Madam De Fer and saving the Empresses life soon. Though – thinking about it – Celene may marry Blake for a strong Alliance if he's willing. Honestly, Blake is rather good looking and Celene was willing to marry Cailan…"
Celene was almost 40 and unmarried; Blake was 26 and an official Cousland – thus he had a high enough standing to marry the woman. I heard she was still very beautiful and more inclined to women – hence she was willing to marry a pretty man.
Cullen coughed, "Poor Blake – now, I'm going to get these Watchtowers started. They won't be ready for at least a month, but I don't have to be here for the whole building – just getting things started and coming back for the inspection later."
I gave him a kiss before he took off towards the first area.
Dennet said, "You seem to have everything all planned out."
"Unfortunately not – I only know so much. This whole marriage with Alistair thing blindsided me and there are other things I just can't plan for."
"Well – at least the watchtowers are getting built. I'll pack and watch the Halla…"
We split up – Max, Varric and Solas heading for the rifts and Cass, Ellana and I heading for the Demon Wolf lair.
Ellana spoke, "Did you mean to split up the boys from the girls?"
No, "Yes – let's show the men that we're better than they are. These wolves are being led by a demon – a fear demon – if we take out the demon, then we can let the wolves live. The demon holds an amulet to control the wolves called 'Token of the Packmaster'. When someone wears that, wolves will not attack them. I want that token."
"Creators – imagine showing back up to the farm with the pack of wolves following along like puppies," Ellana shook her head.
I grinned – Cassandra said, "Men always think they are better… this would be a good opportunity to show them just what we are capable of… Alright – I ill use my shield to field the hits from the wolves while Ellana shoots the demon. Once you have the token, we can start heading back. This will work better if we get back before they do."
I pointed out the Cave – though Ellana stopped for a few herbs on the way. I didn't kill the wolves that attacked us outside the cave; I knocked them out with some Earth-brand sleep powder.
Ellana needed two arrows to kill the demon – but only because it lurched out of my grip at the last second. The amulet was black and purple in a swirling pattern covering a wolf in silhouette on a hill. The whole thing was in a light blue gem – supposedly the moon. It was on a silverite chain. The eyes on the silhouette were Veil Quartz. Son of a bitch – with this many veil-touched materials, it was no wonder that it was a powerful item. I was glad it wasn't clunky – actually, it was a tastefully sized accessory. I put it on at once – while the wolves were still out cold – and started climbing walls for the abandoned loot and Crystal Grace.
"What are you doing?" Cassandra asked.
"Crystal Grace – two sets of blooms. There's also a crate with some stuff in it up there; the owner is the picked-clean skeleton back there by that Mosaic piece I plan to take with us, so there's no point in leaving it."
"Oh… what's in the crate?"
Ellana asked.
"In theory, it's a belt… in practice… oh, looks like a belt – but not the one I was expecting. This is an Herbalist pouch. Did we need Dragonthorn and all the other rare herb types? Methinks the answer is yes; we can cultivate at Skyhold."
"Maker – if that isn't what you were expecting then what…?" Cass asked as I jumped back down and the wolves began waking. It was a testament to how much these two women trusted me that neither one tensed; they just expected that these wolves would be tame now – and they were.
One came up and allowed me to pet it as I said, "I was expecting a common grenade belt. Nothing more…"
Ellana was watching the wolves in amusement, "Shall we go put the men in their places?"
"Honestly, they didn't argue because the rifts always have so many demons come out of them before we can close them, right? But none of them stopped to think we might encounter rabies – and Solas even mentioned last night how these wolves could have come under the purview of a demon…"
We started walking – the wolves really did follow us like over-excited puppies and one took a major liking to Ellana (It was a reverse albino; Melanistic – meaning it was pitch black in fur coloring and its eyes were golden).
There was also a grey wolf that took a liking to Cass – so even without the amulet around my neck, the two women now had pet wolves… just let someone try something.
We got back to the farm and I could see Elaina watching us with an amused look. The woman was tougher than nails; her biggest problem had been that the wolves were bothering the farm-hands; she didn't care if we killed them or tamed them.
Cullen was discussing something with Bron again – we passed one of the Watchtowers being started on the way back, but he hadn't been there. He glanced up when Bron pointed toward us.
It must have been quite the sight – 2 humans and a Dalish, all women, being followed by a pack of 15 wolves as though we held the fabled beef-flavored bone treats.
Cullen cursed and ran a hand through his hair before passing a pouch to Jackson. I laughed and called out, "Did you really?"
As we approached, he said, "I didn't think you would be able to stop the wolves from attacking without killing them – so I bet that you would return with pelts. Jackson said you would return with full-grown wolves. I thought there was no way… how is this possible? They look more like tamed puppies."
I smirked, "Token of the Packmaster – a demon was wearing it and leading the pack. I took the amulet after Cass took the attention and Ellana killed the Demon. Wouldn't you know it – the moment I put the amulet on, they stopped attacking and became very friendly. Isn't it such a pretty amulet, though?"
Ellana sniggered, "It's completely Veil-Touched. The whole amulet came from the Fade."
Cullen sighed, "You know – you did warn me not to bet against you…"
"How much did you lose?" I grinned.
"… 5 Sovereigns…" he admitted. I laughed, "Jackson, you're terrible!"
"What – you were the one to tell me that you planned to bring wolves back on your first trip to the Hinterlands; I took a guess that this was when you were going to get them. It isn't my fault that I used that knowledge to sucker the commander."
Cullen cursed again, "When did you tell him that?"
"The day before Elissa and Nate arrived in Haven. I don't drink much, right? That night, I was proving that I can't get drunk to Jackson by drinking him under the table. I've never been able to get more than tipsy; always assumed it was an Irish heritage or something. Turns out that it was this fun mark around my neck; Couslands were blessed with anti-toxin and that's what the mark is… I guess that's why I didn't die eating all manner of toxic things… but since alcohol is actually a toxin, it makes sense."
"Alcohol is a toxin?" Cassandra asked.
"Well… yeah – it completely destroys the liver if you consume too much of it. That's how you get liver cancer. It can also cause behavioral changes, blackouts, hallucinations, heart damage, lung infections, stomach disease, birth defects if consumed while pregnant, infertility, sexual disfunction, malnutrition, numbness, and muscle cramps. Of course, most of those only develop after a prolonged period of drinking alcohol over ones' life. That's why I don't drink much."
"… I think I need to limit my drinking now," Jackson said with a flush.
"Dude – humans put so much poison in their bodies… Tobacco, Chocolate, almonds, kidney beans, honey, cherries, potatoes, mushrooms… look, if it tastes good, then assume it is poisoning you in some way. I'm still gonna eat chocolate; fuck anyone that tries to stop me."
"How are potatoes poison?" Cullen asked in exasperation. I heard the other guys returning too so I answered…
"Potatoes, tomatoes, and eggplants all belong to the nightshade family, which contains a poison called solanine; if you keep an eye out for green or sprouted potatoes, you should be okay. The whole plant stores the toxin, so you shouldn't go eating the leaves or flowers, but the tuber itself can also be dangerous when it's ready to start, or has already started, sprouting. If you see green on your potato or it started sprouting, then do not eat it. With cherries, it's more the stone pit that's poison. Cyanide is super-deadly so… the pit of a cherry contains enough poison to drop a 150-pound man. If honey is unpasteurized, it's dangerous to pregnant women and young children. Consuming more than a teaspoon of unpasteurized honey could result in nausea, dizziness, headaches, or even death in young children or pregnant women. Almonds also contain hydrocyanic acid; eating around 10 raw bitter almonds could be fatal for a child. The sweet ones are safer."
"Makers' Breath – so that's how Royce died! He ate green potatoes – he said if it didn't start sprouting…"
Solas spoke, "You are certainly well-versed on toxic foods…"
I smirked at him, "I was very conscious about what went into my body; I didn't care if it was bad for me, I just wanted to know how bad. That way, I could avoid feeding anything bad to my guests. Though if anyone asked, I was following the old adage of 'My body is a temple'."
"Then why get tattoos?" Varric smirked.
"Sylvia Plath once said 'If the body is a temple, then tattoos are the Stained-Glass Windows.' But then – there was a better quote; My body may be a temple, but I am the god to whom it is devoted; do not presume to tell me how I may decorate my alter. Can't remember who said that one, but I loved it."
Solas was smirking, "Calling yourself a god?"
"I am the god of my own body – nothing more, nothing less. I do not presume to tell you how you may dress, ink or pierce your Alter thus you should not do that to me. If I want to get a tattoo on my ass that says 'exit only' then I damn well will."
Cullen was bright red and the others were laughing. Cullen knew I was willing to try those things… but I think the image was now firmly in his head.
Jackson sputtered and looked away. Maxwell – drowning in wolves at this point – said, "Can we explain the wolves?"
I held up the token, passing it to Solas. He looked it over, "Interesting – where did you find such a trinket?"
"Off a Terror Demon leading these wolves. It's called the 'Token of the Packmaster'… I think that makes this whole scenario self-explanatory. I am the Alpha; they follow me."
Solas – a glint of amusement in his eyes – passed the 'trinket' back to me and I put it on once more. Varric sighed, "This book will have mixed opinions… just like the part with Orsino in Tale of the Champion…"
"But just like that part, it will be completely true. Harvesters – Elissa fought one of those in Amgarrak a few years ago. The first Harvester was created by the smiths of Amgarrak Thaig – it was a vain attempt to recreate Caridins' works. The smiths used the corpses of casteless dwarves instead of metal and stone, claiming that 'It would be an honor for a casteless dwarf to die in such way'. It makes me sick to think about it. Nereda – a Tevinter Mage with the expedition – used blood magic to seal a Fade spirit inside the construct made of flesh and bone… When the construct came alive, the head removed itself from the body and disappeared, becoming the first Harvester. Ugh – it must have been sickening to see such a thing; especially when not expecting it."
Varric nodded grimly, "I think I lost my lunch after the fight was over… then we had to fight Meredith; crazy bitch. Hawke was named Viscount for a time but we both know that didn't last."
I nodded sympathetically.
Cullen ran a hand through his hair, "Right – Bron says your idea is a stroke of genius and he wishes he'd thought of it. The first tower is underway and I've sent men to mark the other two locations. I have tonight and then I'm headed back to Haven."
"The tents are enchanted to be soundproof from the inside…"
"Makers' Breath – you're shameless." He muttered with a small smile.
"How else did I get married to you so early. It wasn't supposed to be possible until 9:44 – four years. No – fuck that; I didn't want to wait and go slow when I already know I'm in love."
He kissed my cheek, "And I'm glad you didn't wait; especially with the pressure from Denerim for you to marry Alistair. If you married him first… well, I'm not sure it would have been an option to marry me…"
I nodded and said, "Right – we got the stuff done; let's talk to Dennet and then head back to the Camp."
