Author's Note
Thank you Arodri and thatoddfangirl for leaving your first reviews on here! And thank you to Neekah, Melfoy4193 and ihaveaslighttvaddiction for reviewing again! I absolutely love hearing from all of you, especially knowing that you're coming back again and still enjoying the story :)
Hope you love this chapter too...
Wishin' girl x x x
...
She was sure she had seen his eyebrows furrow slightly. She was so sure of it that she would have bet her life on it but as the hours passed by with the pair watching intently, hopeful tears filling their eyes, he did not move.
"I'm so sorry George" Hermione croaked through her cascading tears, the dam in her eyes had long since broken "I really thought… I'm so sorry, it must have just been me being silly…"
"Mione s'ok" George's voice cracked painfully as he too allowed his tears to fall for his brother "I… one day… one day he'll open his eyes for us… and he'll be back to pranking and joking and laughing with us all... "
With a tight hug for George and a kiss on the cheek for Fred, Hermione grabbed her book and left. She couldn't bear to watch his unmoving face any longer with all her hopes crashing down around her.
Her footsteps echoed around the tiled floors and plain white walls as she walked through the hospital corridors on autopilot, her mind swirling with thoughts of Fred waking, dying, laughing, never moving again, hugging her, being in pain, smiling, having a funeral... She decided that she wouldn't tell the rest of the Weasleys about thinking Fred had moved, it wasn't kind to get their hopes up like that and she felt guilty enough as it was for doing that to George. In her head she practised what she would say when the Weasleys asked her about her evening, what words she would use to avoid the truth without lying, the tone of voice she would say them in and she even practised giving small tired looking smiles. It was so late when she arrived in a flash of green flames in the burrow's fireplace that everyone was already in bed asleep so she need not have worried.
Slipping off her trainers Hermione grabbed a fresh glass of water from the kitchen and made her way quietly upstairs. Moonlight filled the bathroom so she was able to brush her teeth and wash her face without needing to risk waking anyone by turning on the light. She pushed the door to her and Ginny's room open just enough to slip inside before changing into her pyjama shorts and one of Ron's old Chudley Cannons t-shirts, slid into bed and put up her silencing charms.
Even though she and Ron weren't together romantically, they were still best friends and she found great comfort in wearing his old t-shirts to sleep in. She didn't feel quite so alone when she did.
…
Screams ripped through the air. The most horrifying noise that Ginny had ever heard causing her to sit bolt upright in fear.
"NOOOOO!" the screams became louder and impossibly more intense as Ginny looked over at Hermione's bed to see her body contorting into impossible shapes and writhing in obvious agony.
Ginny was across the room within seconds and kneeling by her side. She wiped the sweat from Hermione's pale brow with the back of her hand, the brunette was ice cold, and shook her shoulders gently trying to wake her.
"Hermione wake up" she pleaded as her own tears fell in heavy drops "it's just a dream it isn't real. Come on Hermione, please wake up."
"Pleeease…. Please stop…" begs escaped from Hermione's purple lips in between her harrowing screams. Her back arched off the bed and her limbs continued to twist in ways Ginny didn't even know were possible for a human being.
Ginny was feeling more and more helpless, shaking Hermione harder didn't work to wake her nor did any of Ginny's pleading words. Jumping to her feet Ginny's sleep addled brain had an idea and she sprinted up the burrow's stairs to the very top as quickly as she could. Dawn was almost breaking and the pale blue light of early morning helped guide her path as she burst into Ron's room and shook both inhabitants awake.
"It's Hermione," she gasped through her tears "I think she's having a nightmare."
As soon as the word Hermione escaped his sister's lips Ron was out of bed and pummelling down the stairs with Harry hot on his heels.
"Shhh, shhh Hermione it's alright. You're safe. You're safe now. We're all safe now. You're okay. We're all okay. It's okay now. You're safe here. You're safe." Ron whispered into her curls repeatedly, his long limbs wrapped tightly around her body so she couldn't thrash about and hurt herself any more. His hands smoothed her hair and rubbed comforting circles on her back until the screams had died down to heavy sobs wracking through her tight chest.
While continuing to whisper words of safety and comfort, Ron picked her up when she opened her eyes and carried her down to the lounge. Harry had watched Ron comfort Hermione at Shell Cottage on the first night after Malfoy Manor, he knew Ron was better at this than he was, so decided to put his efforts into comforting a frightened Ginny instead who had never seen her friend in such a state before.
Ron settled himself into an armchair in front of the lounge window and arranged Hermione on his lap such that they could watch the sunrise together comfortably. He didn't ask any questions or prod her to talk in any way. He knew her inside out and she would talk when she was ready.
The sky turned from a chalky pale blue to a light mauve before it slowly filled with gold. The edge of the sun's flaming white glow was just emerging over the top of the orchard trees when she finally spoke.
"I was there again" Hermione's voice was so quiet that Ron barely noticed she had spoken "I was in Malfoy Manor and she… I can feel the cruciatus curse every time like it's happening again, I feel the burning of that hellish knife carving my arm like it's a fresh wound…"
"Every time?" Ron asked equally quietly, his voice entirely free of judgement.
"Every night since the final battle" Her voice was cold and empty now "I don't know why my silencing charms failed me tonight."
"What was different tonight?" He asked kindly. Ron knew that she didn't need his re-assurance right now, or his anger at her use of silencing charms to keep this from them. Instead what she needed was to work out this puzzle she had presented herself with, she needed the distraction and the feeling of accomplishment that came with working out an answer.
"I…" She thought back to a couple of hours ago and furrowed her brow in thought "I slept longer than usual, I got back nearly three hours ago and usually I don't make it much past one hour before waking. Maybe it became less effective over time."
Ron nodded and held her closer as he wished he had known that she had been sleeping so little and suffering so much, wished he had been less focused on his own recovery and more on hers.
"But I was also distracted when I put up the charms so maybe it was that…" She felt so safe in his arms that she opened up for the first time to someone who was awake rather than immobilised by a coma. She told him of the nightmares she had every night and the silencing charms she used to protect those around her from them. She explained why Molly was okay with her helping around the house and garden so much and even went into detail of her therapy sessions. She outlined her triggers and explained why she never left the burrow unless it was to visit St Mungo's. She described her visits to Fred every night and what she thought she had seen this evening.
The pair cried together and held each other tight as the hours passed and the burrow started to come to life around them.
From then on she didn't use her silencing charms and she slept in Harry's bed in Ron's room so they could wake and comfort each other from their nightmares. Harry moved into Charlie and Bill's old room on Molly's orders, despite Ginny's protests that he should stay with her, he often sneaked down into her room after dark anyway but kept up appearances during the day.
The golden trio could often be found sitting on the dock with their feet dangling in the cool pond as they processed their memories and emotions together and she soon was able to sleep through the night. The nightmares still came but when she slept in Ron's arms they were rare and even then he soon woke her and soothed her enough to go back to sleep. In return she healed the cuts he gave himself on the really bad days and his broken knuckles from punching the thick trees in the orchard when he became completely overwhelmed by anger and hurt and grief at all that had been lost and endured.
…
Hermione continued to visit Fred every night and entered his room one Thursday evening at the end of August, prepared to read the final chapter of Alice Through the Looking Glass, when she was frozen in place.
…
The pain and voices had faded from Fred against his will and he clawed at them willing them not to go away.
This time though his memories were different. Instead of seeing one distinct memory he saw a compilation of glimpses and flashes of time.
She shook his hand primly as she introduced herself at the Gryffindor house table on the evening of her sorting. He loved the feel of her palm against his own.
He held her as she cried in front of the fireplace at the loneliness she felt and soon her tears were replaced by smiles at her two new friends instead. He loved being the one to cheer her up.
She ran into the great hall when she was healed from her petrification, her smile wide and brave. He loved that confident smile that blotted out the rest of the world.
He wrapped her sleeping form in a blanket on the burrow's sofa one late summer evening and marked her place in her book before placing it on the side table, something he had done time and time again. He loved how comfortable she was around his family.
She lent across the library table to correct his potion recipe for canary creams and swore him to secrecy. He loved her secret prankster side.
He provoked her and teased her at every opportunity. He loved the way her eyes lit up ferociously.
She walked into the great hall in that periwinkle blue dress. He loved how captivatingly beautiful she always looked.
He got caught by her putting up his advert on the Gryffindor notice board for product testers. He loved the way she put her hands on her hips and raised her eyebrows at him threateningly.
She spun around the dance floor at his eldest brother's wedding, her laughter lighting up her face. He loved how free she was.
He reached out in fear and heartache as he saw her apparate away with Harry and his youngest brother across the chaos that followed Kingsley's patronus' announcement. He loved how powerful she was to change the world.
She was gone for months without sending updates or requests for help and he worried for her every moment. He loved how committed she was to creating a brighter, safer, better future for everyone in their world.
He stopped breathing when he arrived at Hogwarts and saw her in action fighting off multiple death eaters at once who were surrounding her, easily throwing more nonverbal spells at them than he had even seen before. He loved how fearless she was, a true Gryffindor.
She hadn't been in sight when the wall collapsed on him and the world went dark. He needed to see her, he needed to know that she was okay, he had to find out if she made it through the battle, he had to know if she was alive…
"Mia…" a dry whisper made George jump "Mione… Love… Mi…."
