A/N: The mention of the Doctor and Jamie back on the Wheel with Zoe is a reference to "You Can't Go Home Again (Or Can You?)", the prequel story to this series.
Heaving a sigh as she laid back on the bed, Kathryn tried to keep her attention on the colorful magazine about local flora and fauna in her hands. The jumble of thoughts occupying her mind made it a near impossibility. After all that had recently happened, of course, it was no surprise.
After she had ended up in the underground lair of the Grom with Sarah and had been wrongly sentenced to death, she never thought she would see Jamie, the Doctor, or the UNIT men again. No doubt she had been in grave situations before – being possessed by a malevolent force and a spirit of a Scottish nobleman, for one – but being accused of attempted murder and nearly put to death had topped them all. She had had no idea where exactly she and Sarah had been brought and thus assumed it would be a long shot that they'd ever be found.
The fact they had arrived as the sentencing was being brought down seemed nothing short of a miracle. She was certainly relieved he'd brought the other stone but wasn't confident the Grom would drop their charges. After all, its disappearance had nearly killed them. Coupled with the fact that both their logic and sense of justice seemed quite warped to begin with, the odds did not seem to be on their side.
Apparently, its return was all they needed to not only free her and Sarah, but to beg their forgiveness. She certainly hadn't expected that but she knew desperation made humans do strange things; why shouldn't it be any different as far as other species were concerned?
Not only had the Grom apologized and allowed them to go free, they had even offered to prepare a banquet for Doctor seemed disappointed not to take them up on the offer, but Sarah had insisted they leave. Kathryn was glad, given the food they were served in prison. Although it wasn't necessarily representative of the Grom's culinary skills, the two women were simply exhausted and wanted to get back home as soon as possible. Fortunately, Brigadier Lethbridge-Stewart and Warrant Officer Benton had also brought climbing equipment, making it easier for them all to scale the trench back up to the surface.
Kathryn couldn't wait to return home, have a proper shower and a meal, but the Brigadier made her endure a routine physical exam and debrief them on all that had happened. She knew it was part of the process and wasn't about to object, but she was dreadfully tired and wanted to leave. The Brigadier seemed to feel badly she was placed in this situation and had to submit to all this. Still, he was first and foremost a military officer and had to follow proper protocol.
'Perhaps you would be better off not being so involved with these people any longer,' spoke the nagging little voice inside her. She'd first heard it during the argument with Jamie which had led to this whole situation. It was now back, louder and more persistent. Kathryn couldn't help feeling just a bit of remorse for feeling this way. They were lovely people and had done a lot for both Jamie and herself, but the two of them were now entering a new chapter of their life. She'd be happier if the others were more like a footnote than multiple paragraphs' worth.
Realizing what this meant, she frowned. She had to convince Jamie and knew it would be difficult, especially considering the Doctor was such a close friend of his and had been for quite some time. He had recounted to her all sorts of adventures he'd had with the Time Lord: all the fun, the close calls, and of course the number of times the Doctor – in whatever incarnation – had saved his life. Clearly the Doctor was quite special to him. She certainly had her work cut out for her.
The sound of waves crashing against the beach interrupted her ruminations. She lifted her gaze from the magazine to the stunning view in front of her, one she'd not had much opportunity to appreciate in the very recent past. Once they had arrived home and had rested up a good deal, Jamie professed to Kathryn how very badly he'd felt about what had happened and insisted on making it up to her. They had returned to the Cornish coast and, as luck would have it, found the cottage in which they initially stayed still available.
Kathryn felt a small, content smile twitch at her lips. As badly as things seemed earlier, luck had certainly been with her: first the Doctor, Jamie and the others showing up just as she and Sarah had been sentenced to death, and now getting a second chance to enjoy – what was to her – paradise.
She felt the bed shake slightly and turned to find Jamie had sat down beside her.
She grinned. "Back so soon?"
His brow furrowed in confusion. "Eh? I've been gone near half an hour," he replied, a slight note of disbelief in his tone.
Kathryn's eyes widened and she felt her face flush. "Oh, goodness. I didn't realize where the time had gone." She gave him an apologetic smile as she met his gaze.
"'S'all right," he replied with a smile of his own. "I've got somethin' for ye."
She regarded him curiously as he reached behind his back and revealed a small bouquet of wildflowers. Kathryn's jaw dropped as she gazed at them. Of various sizes and colors, the main ones being white, yellow and purple, they were quite pretty. Bending over, she inhaled their fragrance, smiling as the lovely, subtle coconut scent tantalized her senses.
"You got these for me?"
She caught a faint blush staining Jamie's cheeks as he shyly looked away and nodded. "Aye." She touched his shoulder and he turned back to her with a tentative smile. "A wee peace offering. For our huge argument which led tae all this."
Witnessing the guilt in his eyes, Kathryn felt her heart breaking. "Jamie, there is so much I need to say to you." She suddenly felt quite overwhelmed. "But, blimey, I don't know where to begin."
Jamie nodded, his own expression heavy with emotion. "Aye. I'm no' quite sure where tae begin either." He gazed down at the bed for a fleeting moment. "I'm jus' so thankful ye're all right," he suddenly blurted, his voice faltering.
Before Kathryn could react, he quickly grabbed her, capturing her in a tight hug. She felt his body shuddering slightly, the emotional dam seemingly having burst forth. They had stayed this way for a good while after which he'd pulled back only to cover her lips with his, kissing her deeply. It was almost as if he were afraid to let her go.
Once they had finally separated, Kathryn gazed at him as she tried to get her breath. She had relished the kiss, but still felt some overwhelming sadness as she watched Jamie suddenly look away once more. He seemed almost embarrassed by his impulsive show of affection.
"Sorry," he mumbled. His gaze had returned to the bed as he dropped his chin to his chest and the long strands of hair had covered his eyes.
Chuckling fondly at him, she reached over and brushed the hair away from his face, causing him to look back up at her with a sheepish expression. "Don't be, Jamie. After what just happened, I reckon I know what you're trying to say." Oops, she hadn't meant for it to come out quite that way.
Jamie apparently didn't mind, though, if his soft laughter was anything to go by. She found his eyes twinkling as he lovingly met her gaze.
"Can I ask ye something?" he said.
She nodded. "Of course."
"Ye said ye saw me holdin' Sarah Jane that day the Doctor had changed. Why had ye no' spoken tae me aboot it?"
Kathryn suddenly looked away, feeling really ashamed. "I don't know," she muttered, waving her hand dismissively in front of her face. "It was daft of me."
"No, please, tell me, lass," he persisted. "Ye thought I had feelings for her, didn't ye. If it upset ye as much as I think it did, why didnae ye say anything tae me?"
"I really should have done," she told him, feeling even more ashamed as she met his gaze once again. "But it's not just that. I never should have made such a ridiculous assumption in the first place. If I hadn't, we wouldn't have had that terrible argument and I wouldn't have ended up down there. This entire thing is my fault." She looked away again, feeling as if she wanted to hide.
She heard Jamie sigh and felt a hand softly touching her arm. Turning, she found him gazing at her sadly as he took her into his arms. "Don' blame yerself, lass," he said softly. "This is my fault as well. I said some things I never should have. I shouldnae have insisted on coming back tae London. Aye, I felt responsible for Sarah having been taken. But 'twas our honeymoon; our special time taegether. I shouldnae have brought the communicator wi' me in the first place. As much as I owe the Doctor an' UNIT, we've got our own life now an' I need tae separate the two."
Kathryn inwardly breathed a sigh of relief upon realizing he felt the same as she did. "I must confess something. During the argument I griped about how much time you spent with them. It wasn't said only out of anger, there was some truth to it. Under any other circumstance, I might have just gone along and tried to cope with it, but after what's just happened I would feel better not getting so involved with them any longer." Jamie simply nodded and she could tell he didn't seem very pleased to hear this. "I wanted to mention it to you, but I was worried about how you would take it, Jamie. I know how very close you and the Doctor are. I know that he's been such a huge part of your life."
Jamie heaved a sigh and nodded again. "Aye. I willnae lie to ye. I've just started thinkin' this m'self."
This revelation caught Kathryn unawares. "You have?"
"Mm, I have. I was dreadin' the verra thought, but I knew I couldnae put it off forever. I'm gannae have tae make some important decisions." As he met her gaze, he appeared as if he had the weight of the world on his shoulders. For a brief moment, it almost made him appear older than his nearly twenty-six years.
Kathryn eyed him sadly. Goodness, she felt her heart breaking all over again. "I'm sorry, Jamie," she said, reaching out to stroke his hair. "I know how difficult this must be for you."
Turning to her, Jamie shook his head with an encouraging smile. "'S all right. It's somethin' I've got tae do. Kathryn, you are so special an' important tae me. I would never forgive myself if ye'd been badly hurt or killed. The Doctor will understand." His smile suddenly faded. "I hope."
Kathryn quirked an eyebrow. "You hope?"
"But I'm sure he will," he added quickly. "An' if not I will make him understand."
"You think you can?"
"I'm sure of it. Ye know, this isnae the first time I had tae make a decision like this."
Another revelation of his had taken her by surprise. "Really?"
"Aye. I willnae go into it, but after the Doctor – I mean his other self – rescued me from prison after Culloden an' we had gone back tae visit Zoe on the Wheel, I decided I wanted tae take a break from travelin' with him. That's how I ended up here." His gaze turned thoughtful. "Of course he'd meant tae take me to Paris tae be reunited wi' my family."
Kathryn chuckled as she remembered Jamie telling her this back when they'd first met. "Well I'm glad he got off course, then."
He soon joined her. "As much as we'd joke aboot the TARDIS no' getting us where we wanted tae go, I'm so thankful she did this time."
She beamed at him. "As am I."
She met his loving gaze and they inched closer together until his lips joined with hers once more and he bestowed another amazing kiss upon her.
Jamie gazed nervously at his hands as he walked the corridors of UNIT HQ to the Doctor's lab. He and Kathryn had had a marvelous time in Cornwall. He'd been pleased to finally give them a proper honeymoon. They'd done quite a bit of sightseeing and, of course, spent time just relaxing at the seaside and doing the usual 'honeymoon things.' Jamie felt his lips spread into a wide grin as those memories stirred up inside him.
It was now over, though, and there was pressing business to attend to back here in London. He'd be lying to himself if he weren't concerned about how the Doctor would take the news and a small part of himself wished he could put it off for another day.
But he knew he couldn't. This was too important. Kathryn's life had been in grave danger. He couldn't allow anything like this to happen again, no matter how minuscule the chance. As he'd recently told her himself, it wasn't as though he'd never suggested something like this to the Doctor before. He reminded himself once again of the situation with the later incarnation of the Time Lord and the vashta nerada when they had returned to Zoe on the Wheel. He'd worked up the courage then to tell the Doctor he wished to take a break from traveling with him. This wasn't the same situation, of course, but very similar.
It also wasn't as if he were telling the Time Lord he wanted absolutely nothing to do with him, either. He simply wished to step back more and be less involved with him and UNIT. Surely the Doctor would understand that, what with him being newly married especially.
"Oh!"
A sudden exclamation and the impact of someone against him threw him from his introspection. He turned to find a flustered Sarah Jane with a hand to her chest. "I'm sorry, Jamie. I hadn't seen you," she blurted apologetically.
He noticed a couple of small pieces of paper had fallen to the floor and he immediately bent to pick them up. "No, that's all right," he told her as he handed them back to her. "Yers?"
She smiled. "Yes, Harry and I have got tickets to a concert this evening."
Jamie felt a smile of his own spreading across his face. "Do ye now? Have a lovely time."
"Thank you." Her smile widened. "I meant to ask, how was the honeymoon?"
"'Twas verra nice," he told her. His smile faded as a nagging voice inside him reminded him of why he was here. "I'll have tae tell ye aboot it one day. I really need tae speak to the Doctor now. Is he here?"
"Oh, yes. He's in the laboratory, like always," she replied with a slight roll of her eyes and a grin.
"Oh, aye. Thank ye, Sarah Jane." He resumed walking, slowing just to glance back over his shoulder. "An' have a wonderful time taenight."
He'd barely caught Sarah nodding her head and waving as he neared the Doctor's laboratory. Stopping just outside the doors, he wiped his sweaty palms on the tartan fabric of his kilt and took a deep breath.
Pushing the door open slightly, he found the Time Lord sitting at the bench reading a book with a well-worn cover. Jamie scuffed his boots on the floor but it didn't seem to get his attention.
"Doctor?" he asked tentatively.
The Doctor whirled around, his eyes widened in surprise. "Oh, Jamie! Back from the honeymoon!" His mouth spread into a wide grin. "How went it?"
An awkward smile twitched at Jamie's lips. No, this certainly wasn't going to be easy. "Um, it was nice. Verra nice," he replied, his smile becoming more confident. "We visited a lot of pretty places. Kathryn was so happy to have gone back there."
"I'm glad to hear it," the Doctor replied with a smile.
Jamie nodded, looking away for a moment as he suddenly became emotionally overwhelmed. He coughed awkwardly and returned his gaze to the Doctor. "I cannae tell ye how relieved we both are to have got her back safe. Doctor, I never should've doubted ye."
The Doctor reached out to pat him on the shoulder. "I told you we would find them." He gazed fondly at Jamie and his eyes widened, as if an idea had struck. "Oh! I must tell you," he began, grabbing the book he'd been reading. "Oddly enough, I located some information in my diary concerning the Grom."
Jamie merely stared at him, this revelation catching him off guard.
"Yes, it seems their kind goes back thousands of years. They actually started out as humans, you know. They were a particular group of humans which had moved underground in the midst of a particularly harsh winter."
A frown of confusion knitted Jamie's brow. "Why would they do that?"
"Well, it's warmer underground, of course."
"Oh, aye," Jamie said with a nod, feeling a bit silly for overlooking common sense.
"Apparently, they either lacked the ability to adapt to the harsh conditions, or perhaps they didn't wish to go to the trouble. The had adapted to life underground, but lacked several basic necessities; in particular, sunlight."
"So, what happened?"
"This was remedied by the two Life Stones." Studying the diary, the Time Lord's brow furrowed. "Their origin is uncertain, whether they accidentally found them or whether they were the creation of an alchemist. They gave off a life force that sustained the Grom, and it works only when the two stones are together."
"Ah," Jamie muttered, finding this all interesting.
"There's more," the Doctor continued. "It seems the life force feeds not only the Grom, but their atmosphere as well. That is why everything was so dark and dank down there before they returned the stone to its rightful place." He finally looked up, gazing expectantly at Jamie.
Jamie nodded thoughtfully, although a troubling thought had suddenly entered his mind. "So, ye've met these Grom before, then?"
The Doctor gave a small shrug. "Apparently so, but it was ages ago. And not under such tense circumstances, obviously." He appeared rather perplexed. "You''d think I would have remembered that. Hm. 'Suppose it's possible I had not met them and this information was obtained second-hand from some group that had interacted with them."
Jamie wished it weren't so, but at this moment he felt quite frustrated. "If only we'd known this when I had first found the stone an' brought it to ye," he said with a frown. "Mebbe then Sarah an' Kathryn wouldnae have been captured." As odd as it might have seemed, it was this frustration which gave him the push he needed to finally make his case for spending less time with the Doctor and UNIT.
He turned and found the Doctor eyeing him contritely. His expression didn't sit well with Jamie, but he continued on. "Doctor, I ..." He stopped to rake a nervous hand through his hair and toss it back. "I need tae speak with ye aboot something."
The Doctor nodded and held out a hand, gesturing for him to continue.
"I did feel responsible for Sarah Jane having been kidnapped; I was the one who found the stone in the first place. But when ye contacted me aboot it I should've stayed in Cornwall, no' come back here. I blame m'self for that, but Kathryn was right aboot one thing. Ye see, when she an' I had that argument in Cornwall – before she disappeared – she told me she wasnae happy aboot us no' having much time taegether. I thought she was exaggeratin' a wee bit outta anger, but thinking on it I realized she was right." He stopped and sighed, afraid to look the Doctor in the eye. "What I'm tryin' tae say is … Mebbe I should step back a wee bit and no' get so involved with ye an' UNIT. I wish tae spend some more time wi' Kathryn."
He finally lifted his gaze to find the Doctor gazing at him with wide, sad eyes, seeming both baffled and hurt at the same time. After a protracted stare, a wide, mad grin suddenly spread across his face. "You'll be back," he said.
Jamie felt his lips tighten into an uncomfortable grimace and he briefly looked away. When he turned back to the Doctor he found his grin had faded.
"You won't ..." he drifted off, appearing quite disappointed.
Jamie heaved a sigh. Yes, he knew this was going to be difficult, but he felt the Doctor had misunderstood. "It willnae be 'Goodbye', Doctor," he corrected him. "I jus' wish tae have a smaller role wi' you an' UNIT. As my wife, Kathryn needs tae come first. Look, ye've been a large part of my life for some time. I owe so much to ye for all ye've done for me ... pulling me outta trouble, saving my life more times than I care tae remember." He chuckled sheepishly and looked up to find the Doctor with a sad smile on his face. "But, I'm married now. There are gannae be times when ye might need me, but Kathryn needs me as well."
The Doctor's expression turned thoughtful and he nodded. "I understand perfectly." He then appeared rueful. "Goodness me, I've got a lot of cheek to expect so much from you during this important time in your life, haven't I?"
Jamie chuckled. "No, it's my fault as well, Doctor. I'd never been married before, let alone in a verra serious relationship. I've now learnt what such a commitment means. I need – no, I want – tae spend more time wi' her now."
"Well, whatever you'd like, Jamie, it shall be yours," the Doctor told him with a kind smile.
Jamie's lips twitched into a grateful smile as he nodded. "I cannae thank ye enough, Doctor. I have tae admit, I was no' sure ye'd understand."
"Oh, of course I understand," the Doctor said with a dismissive wave. "How many times have I heard similar wishes from family and friends? My own granddaughter wished to stay behind on Earth and settle down with that David fellow."
Jamie's brow furrowed in confusion.
The Doctor's mad grin was back. "I won't bore you with that," he said with a wink.
Jamie smiled in amusement for a fleeting moment before it faded and he eyed the Doctor seriously. "Jus' remember it's no' 'Goodbye' like the others," he insisted. "I'll still come 'round from time tae time. But no' as often as I've been doin' so."
"Of course." His fond smile turned into another grin. "Just keep in mind we'd all be very interested in seeing baby photos once the time comes." He clapped Jamie on the back. "Congratulations once again, my dear friend."
"Thank ye, Doctor," Jamie told him softly, his face beaming in a genuine smile.
"So, how did it go today?" Kathyrn asked as she sat next to Jamie on the sofa and handed him a glass of wine.
"Fine," he replied, gazing wistfully into the glass.
"That's it? Just 'fine'?" Her eyes twinkled in amusement.
Jamie regarded her sheepishly with a slight shrug. "He said he understood. I still feel badly aboot approaching him the way I did, but it had tae be done." He gazed affectionately at her as he snaked an arm around her shoulder, pulling her close. "I love ye so much, lass. I wish tae spend as much time with ye as I'm able an' I willnae let my business with the Doctor an' UNIT get in the way. An' I'm certainly no' gannae let ye be put in harm's way again."
"I know this was difficult for you," she said, a hint of sadness in her voice. "But I'm glad the Doctor understood. This really means a lot to me, Jamie. I love you."
Putting his wine glass aside, he held her face in his hands and kissed her lips tenderly. To say he was relieved this had ended so well was an understatement. He'd suspected the Doctor would understand, even if he wasn't entirely happy. Jamie knew he would never cut himself loose completely from the Doctor and their friends, nor did he want to. After all, he'd owed so much to the Doctor for all he'd done for him in the first place.
But he was now starting a new chapter of his life. He needed to find the perfect mix of his personal life with Kathryn and his life with the Doctor.
Smiling to himself as he gazed at his loving wife sipping her wine and looking perfectly contented, he was confident he could achieve that.
THE END
