Author's Note: I can't thank you all enough for your amazing comments. I love hearing what you think. I'm truly surviving on comments and Baby Yoda right now. How amazing was that last episode of Mandalorian though?!
Rey grudgingly lifted her head from Ben's shoulder, giving in to her desire to see his face again before he faded away. She longed to see him smile like he had on Exegol. A rare, beautiful expression she felt was just for her. But when something tugged gently at their Bond, she knew she wouldn't see it tonight.
They didn't have long.
Instead, she reached her hand up to stroke the side of his face, running her fingers over the place on his cheek that would dimple if he smiled. She studied the line of his jaw, the angle of his lips, thinking of how they would feel against hers again.
He sighed, his warm breath tickling the back of her hand and she raised her gaze to meet his.
He was watching her intently. Searching her face, reaching for her emotions through the Bond. As his eyes burned into hers, she gathered the courage to draw her thumb along his bottom lip, wanting so much to memorize every curve, every feature.
But her fingers passed right through him, as if he were just a holo image. He was fading.
She tried so hard to keep the terror from her face, but when his frown lines deepened, she knew she hadn't been successful.
"We really need to work on making whatever this is last longer."
Trust me, that's the only thing I've been thinking about.
"If you aren't completely part of the living Force, then where are you?"
Her heart sank when his words started coming in short bursts. I'm not sure. I use the Living Force to reach you, but there's something else. Luke mentioned an in between, but I don't think I'm there either.
"That vision earlier, you were with me. What was that?"
There's something wrong, those were Sith cultists. They must –
His words faded into the misty night along with his outline and she was left standing alone.
Rey's lip trembled and she fought against the prickling heat behind her eyes. This back and forth, having him for five minutes and losing him again. It was emotionally exhausting to say the least.
But she gathered herself, flicked on her saber to light her way, and followed the winding path back toward the base.
She was completely lost in thought, until something snapped in the distance. In a split second, she was on high alert, scanning the distance for the source of the noise. She spotted Rose about thirty meters down the path, lantern in hand, brows knitted in concern.
Rey only briefly considered making an excuse as to why she couldn't talk, before remembering the newfound resolve she'd found in Ben's protective arms. Besides that, there was something in Rose's earnest expression that kept her feet planted firm. Rose knew all about loss, having lost her whole family and the thing most precious to her because of this war. She knew all about how it felt when a bond was broken. Rey could talk about this with her, she could share this part of herself.
Rose closed the space between them, speaking in a tone that was kind, but firm. "I have no idea what you're going through, and you don't have to tell me if you don't want to. But I knew you'd still want this." She hung the lantern on her forearm, freeing both hands to present Ben's black shirt to her, handling it like one would hold a priceless, fragile relic. "And there was no way I was letting you run off at this time of night."
Rey took the fabric in her fist and pressed it against her chest, nodding. "Thank you."
Rey captured her friend in a hug with one hand, while still gripping Ben's shirt with the other. Images of everyone she'd lost flashed through her mind, and that ache was back again, that yearning to have him back coupled with a crippling grief for Leia, for her parents, and everyone else they'd lost. She and Rose had both paid a terrible price for this war and Rey could sense that they would both know healing, too. Someday. It wasn't a hopeless grief they shared, but one of rebuilding.
Rey pulled away, looking down at her friend, her heart heavy with regret for how she'd behaved. "I really don't deserve you."
"Don't be ridiculous. This is what friends do."
Rey glanced back down the path toward the base. "I guess we should get back."
But Rose was towing her by the hand, guiding her to sit on a flat boulder near the path.
"Oh no," Rose said. "You aren't getting away again that easily."
Rey realized, self-consciously, that she was still desperately clutching Ben's shirt, holding it tightly to her chest.
Rose noticed her expression and smiled sadly, wrapping her own fist around the medallion she always wore around her neck. "Don't ever be embarrassed for what you do to heal. I get it, Rey."
She needed no more convincing, settling herself onto the boulder.
They shared a long, silent moment watching the mists part to reveal the moons of Ajan Kloss, one pale red, one pale blue, engaged in an eternal chase across the darkened sky.
"Will you tell me?" Rose asked.
When Rey didn't respond immediately, Rose gestured to Ben's shirt. "You wouldn't have kept that, you wouldn't be holding it like you are, if he didn't mean something to you."
Rey swallowed. "I do care – I care about him."
Rose only nodded, taking a seat on an exposed root and setting her lantern at her feet. She leaned forward and rested her chin on her hands, waiting.
"Ben Solo of course, not Kylo Ren. I know it sounds crazy, but they really were two different people."
"How so?"
"Emperor Palpatine had found a way into Ben's mind from the time he was a boy. I saw it in flashes, in memories." Rey shook her head, trying to find the words to describe their inexplicable bond. "Ben and I are connected in the Force somehow."
Rose was nodding, eyes wide as she tried to understand.
"Palpatine manipulated him, groomed him for the Dark Side through Snoke who was just another one of Palpatine's creations. Then one night at the Jedi training temple, Master Skywalker saw that darkness in Ben's mind, saw Palpatine's influence and thought about killing Ben. Ben reacted in self-defense. He felt betrayed and thought he had nowhere else to go, so he sought shelter with Snoke. That's why he became Kylo Ren."
Rose's brows knitted together. "That's definitely not what I expected."
"Me neither," she admitted.
Rey's thoughts drifted back to a moment ago, how incredibly right it had felt for Ben to hold her. To lean against him and feel him so close, to remain in peace, feeling nothing but their bodies and their Bond humming with life between them. And the truth was she needed someone to know. After the way Ben made her feel, she needed to make sure everyone knew. Starting with Rose.
"I can still see him," Rey said.
Rose fingered her medallion, voice growing distant. "I still talk to Paige sometimes. I think that's normal."
Rey rubbed at her forehead, searching for words for all of this. "Not like that Rose. I mean, I can really still see him. Touch him, even." Oh kriff, this sounded insane but she was in too far to stop now. "Before you got here, we… I mean, we hugged. Through the Force."
Even by the dim light of the lantern, Rey could clearly see Rose's eyebrows jump.
"Is that, I mean, is that normal? I mean with the Force, can that happen?"
Rey pressed her lips together and nodded. "It can happen. Master Skywalker appeared to me before, even Leia, but I don't know if what Ben and I have is normal."
Rose's brows knitted together and Rey could practically see the thoughts chasing each other across her face. Shock, confusion, and was that disgust? But it was gone in an instant, at least Rose was trying to understand. Her features finally settled, and she spoke. "Wow, no wonder you're confused."
Rey blew out her lips. "At first, I tried to mourn. But now, I wonder if I need to be searching for something to bring him back."
Rose leaned in, lantern light casting shadows over half of her face. "You think that's possible?"
"I have to hope."
Rose smiled then, highlighting the warmth in her cheeks, the kindness in her eyes. "Good thing we've got experience building things on hope."
When Rey climbed into her bunk in the early hours of the morning, she felt comfortable for the first time in a more than a week. Those first days spent building her lightsaber had blurred together completely into a hazy fog of shock. The days on Tatooine had been twenty-four hour marathons of pure grief. But here, among friends and with Ben's short visits, she was actually living again.
She fell asleep quickly and slept late, rising as the sun's rays shone brightly onto the plant life beyond the hangar. She stood and folded Ben's shirt, trying to ignore the scent of detergent that had replaced him, and rested it delicately onto her pillow. She found the fresher, tied up her hair, and dressed in white.
Rey descended the stairs down to the main level of the base feeling nearly human again, following the smells of breakfast from the mess hall.
Poe and Finn sat on one side of the table, heads together, talking and laughing over their plates. Chewie sat on the other side, looking very involved in breakfast. Finn looked up and spotted her immediately, waving her over.
This was home.
The familiar sound of gears whirring announced C3P0's arrival before his sunny voice could greet her. "Oh. There you are. Mistress Rey! Poe and Finn have invited you to breakfast!"
"Thanks, 3P0," she said, laying a hand on his shoulder joint. "I seem to have found them."
"So good to have everyone here," he twittered to himself, heading off in another direction. Rey figured he was probably heading to the hangar to fill in R2 or BB-8 about whatever news there was to be shared.
"Rey, how are you feeling?" Finn poured a cup of steaming caf and pushed it across the table to her. She inhaled the nutty aroma, an instant comfort, and sipped as Finn insisted on making a plate for her.
"Much better," she said, nodding thanks as he passed the breakfast over.
Chewie growled a comment about the incredible breakfast.
"You would not believe these cholla sausages," Finn said.
He made a show of spearing one on his fork, bringing it slowly in for a bite, and chewing with his eyes closed for full dramatic effect.
"Where's Rose?" she asked, slicing her sausages.
"Working on the X-wings in the central landing area."
Rey nodded, placing a bite of sausage on her tongue. She took her time to appreciate the spicy flavor and the way the meat released a burst of savory juice with each slow chew.
She really needed to meet this new cook.
They filled the breakfast table with conversation, talking of their friends' paths before the conversation eventually turned to Lando Calrissian and Maz Kanata's political futures.
"I'm surprised she agreed to oversee things," Poe said. "She never seemed like one to get involved with politics."
"Desperate times," Finn said. "Besides, it's only for a little while, until the Free Worlds Alliance has a backbone. Then she'll be back doing… well doing whatever it is she does.
"Tell me about what's happening on Corellia," Rey said.
Poe and Finn shared a mutual glance, likely wondering where this new interest was coming from.
"Seems some Imperial loyalists are trying to unify the remaining vessels in the First Order fleet," Poe said.
"Imperial?" Rey asked, gesturing for the sugar.
He handed her the sugar tin. "Lando has a lead on someone from Bestoon. A Sith Loyalist with ties to the old Empire."
Rey stirred a spoonful of sugar into her caf as she put the pieces together. She knew of only one Sith Loyalist from Bestoon. "But Ochi is dead."
"He is," Poe confirmed. "But he may have had a family. Or friends. Who knows."
Finn leaned over the table, tension visible in the set of his jaw as he chewed with more intensity than was truly necessary for the consumption of breakfast sausage. "That's what we need to figure out. Problem is the Free Worlds Fleet was deployed all over the galaxy after the battle of Exegol, those who were willing were sent to defend the systems most impacted by the First Order. We are spread too thin and these loyalists know it."
Rey felt something cold gnawing at the pit of her stomach despite the warmth of the caf. "What do they want?"
"I don't know exactly, but I have a bad feeling, you know?" Finn said.
"I saw something," Rey said quietly. "A vision of these Sith Loyalists."
"I think," she paused to make certain this was how she really felt. But there was no denying that vision. "I think they are looking for me."
Poe was shaking his head before Rey ever finished her sentence. "There's no way. What would they want from you?"
"Power," she said, a shiver snaking up her back. She'd heard the cloaked figures mention the Dyad, the same power that had restored Palpatine's body. And if there was any of that Bond left, these Sith Loyalists would come looking for it. "I shouldn't have come back. If I'm here, you all are in danger."
Finn was standing in a heartbeat. "No. No, Rey. You don't' get to run off again." His eyes shone with a ferocity that pushed back any arguments she could think of. Then, realizing everyone in the mess hall had turned to stare at him, he sat slowly back down. "No. We are in this together, remember?"
"He's right," Poe said. "We've already established that fact, so you can just stop this self-sacrificing bantha shit."
She divided a stony glare between her two friends, until gradually, she was able to reign in her fear and see the concern on their faces. She let her gaze soften, feeling her expression melt from icy into something more like affection. She relaxed when she saw the same feeling mirrored on their faces.
She breathed deeply, shoulders relaxing. "Alright. I need to find out why they want me, first. Which means more reading and meditating. Maybe the Force will show me more."
Finn nodded. "And we should get this information to Lando and Maz, so they can put their ears out."
"If you find out anything, you tell us." Poe's eyes were locked onto hers.
She nodded, noting that this probably would be a good time to tell them about the Dyad. But they were already pushing the bench out, standing to clear their breakfast plates.
Later.
Rey lay gasping in the dappled sunlight against her favorite tree, having just run the training course in record time, all while carrying four of the sacred texts in a pack on her back.
She pulled out her canteen, pouring a stream of cool water into her open mouth, relishing the way it soothed her dry, burning throat on the way down. She was present in this moment, not looking back or forward, as Leia had taught. Only here. Now.
As her breath slowly evened out, she found her way easily into the interconnected web of energy that was the Force.
Master Luke was there with her a moment later. His untidy hair and beard were starkly at odds with the full Jedi regalia he was wearing.
"You've learned control," he noted, stepping forward. "Maybe you can help my hopeless nephew with that. Force knows I tried for years."
Rey smiled. "I had some good teachers."
Rey felt a ripple of thanks from another warm place in the Force.
"Where is she?" Rey asked, wondering why she hadn't seen Leia since that first day on Tatooine.
"She's new to all of this," he said, gesturing to his own bluish outline, "she also pushed herself very hard to save her son, but she'll perfect it in time."
Master Luke looked up into the canopy, as though he could catch a glimpse of his sister there. When he seemed to come back to himself, he crossed the uneven ground with careful steps before locking eyes with Rey. When he was an arm's length away, he reached a hand into his robes, retrieving something she never thought she would see again.
It looked so much bigger in Master Luke's grasp than it ever had in Ben's. But then again, Luke's hands weren't nearly as large. The black hilt was a good foot long, exposed red wiring running the entire length, crossguard vents creating a fierce angle…
"Kylo Ren's lightsaber?"
Luke offered it to her, but she only stared at it.
"What would I want with that?" she asked.
His voice took on an edge of impatience. "If you're planning to fight together to free him, he will need a weapon, too."
"I don't even know what we're fighting."
He narrowed his eyes, presenting the saber again.
She crossed her arms in protest. "But it's… dark. Unstable. He's not – "
Luke clicked his tongue. "Bodies aren't the only things that can be healed."
"I can't heal that crystal. I won't do it."
"You're right," he said, blue eyes blazing through the Force. "Only he can."
"From - from wherever he is? How is that possible?"
Master Luke shook his head, shaggy hair waving back and forth. "Rey, if you two can, well…" He made a humiliating mime of two index fingers coming together and touching in front of his face. "If he can interact with you," he said, twisting the word, making her cheeks flush with embarrassment, "then he can focus on this."
"Where is he?" she asked, trying to deflect her embarrassment.
"I thought he'd traveled to the World Between Worlds, that's where Leia had tried to guide him in her last moments, but it seems he is still tethered by your Bond."
"What do we do?" She asked, feeling a thousand more questions bubbling up inside of her, but managing to put voice to only one.
He stared at her for long moment, expression frustratingly stoic.
"This is your journey, Rey."
She lowered her brows, glaring at the ghost of her former master. "How did I know you were going to say that?"
He offered only a wry smile in response before fading away into the Force.
