Author's Note: I appreciate all the love you are giving to this story! Readers, you are incredible! Get ready for a little spice with this chapter. Okay, maybe more than a little spice. This is probably just filth. Pure filth. Add me on Tumblr at erickawrites to see the illustrations created for each chapter.
I'm hoping for an update this weekend, but please forgive me if I don't come through. I'm heading to Galaxy's Edge on Sunday with my family and I am sooooo excited! But it might set my updates back a bit.
Ben obeyed, crushing a desperate kiss to her mouth, pulling her against him with a sweep of one strong arm. He tasted so kriffing good, sweeter and more intoxicating than any Raava she'd ever had. And she wanted more.
The cold knot of fear in her core began to unravel, each touch of his lips, each eager glide of his hands on her waist peeled back the layers, unfurling her darkness like petals from a frozen plom bloom. She reached out, feeling the vibration of their joint power as it filled the air around them, and Rey used those cold tendrils of Force to caress the nape of his neck, sliding under his robes and down his back.
She felt his fingers grip her tighter in response and her pulse quickened, a dizzying exhilaration now coursing through her.
She licked at the seam of his lips until he offered himself to her, opening his mouth and yielding to her exploration. She felt his sharp intake of breath as their bodies tangled, their tastes mingling and then, he was crashing into her mouth with a hot slide of his own tongue, wet and greedy, a promise of what was to come.
He moaned low against her lips and if she was hungry for him before, now she was ravenous, needing to taste him, to feast on his touch, to devour this man in every way.
She fumbled for the collar of his robe, trying to pull it back over his shoulders, but her fingers were too slow, and the angle all wrong. Frustrated, she turned to the Force of her passion to do the job. So easy, so quick, she curled dark Force around Ben and shucked his outer robe from his shoulders until it fell in a puddle at his feet.
She needed him, his skin, his heat, his mouth. Him. Stars, Rey just wanted him.
The Force was an icy river of greed and she fed from it, wielding it as another appendage, wrapping it around him to peel the layers from his body.
So it's like that, is it? That lopsided smirk was there now, revealing the adorably crooked teeth at the edge of his smile and kriff… how could teeth be so kriffing attractive?
"Yes," she said, sloughing off the last layer and running her hands across the firm angles of his chest and shoulders, at last, feeling the heat of his body beneath her cold fingers. "It's like that."
These ministrations had goosebumps erupting over his body and soon, he was struggling to free her from her coat, pulling it away, groping and untangling and cursing under his breath as though fighting a dozen rathtar tentacles instead of two simple sleeves. Once rid of the loathsome jacket, he lifted her by the waist easily without any need for the Force, and spread her legs, placing her against his hips with his arms wrapped snug around her.
She squeezed her legs tight around him, thighs stretching with a stinging pleasure as the starving center of her need pressed deliciously against his body.
Oh Force. The huskiness in his voice had her aching already.
That was when she felt his control collapse, like a dam breaking, the icy water behind those floodgates came crashing down the Bond and his Dark Force poured over her, a delicious nipping kind of cold that left her nerves raw and open to his touch.
He wielded the darkness like a cold tongue, licking and teasing the exposed skin of her arms as he pressed his hot mouth to hers and drank her in. Rey felt her fingers go numb, as it did when she fell far into that dangerous place, succumbing to that cold energy that had scared everyone else. Everyone but Ben. Finally, with him, she could be. She could fall to that forbidden place and suffer no judgement because he would go there with her.
She spoke these truths with her lips, with her warm breath against the skin of his neck as she bit and licked. She couldn't help but rock a little against him, wrapping her legs tighter, letting him feel the visceral need she had to positively consume him.
Soon, it wasn't enough and she breathed a frustrated moan against his ear. A wordless sound expressing her demand to have more of him against her.
Rey, he said, his voice reduced to a guttural whisper under the weight of his desire. Rey, you know how much I want this. Force.
She growled again, unwrapping her legs from him and sliding down his body, pulling him by the waistband of his pants to the couch.
Rey, we can't, not when I –
She shushed him harshly. "Don't say it. You're supposed to make me forget."
And she could feel him teetering on the edge, the Bond practically commanding their union, but still, he stubbornly persisted. I can't Rey, I… not yet. I want to truly be here.
She let out an exasperated snarl. The need between her legs was utterly consuming now and it completely possessed her thoughts, like a mind-flaying disease which could only be cured by his touch. How dare he do this to her? He'd planted a ravenous desire inside of her and he better damned well find a way to sate it. She was aching, wet with her own thirst for him. She wanted him to fill her, to claim her, to tame this raging fury inside of her.
"Kriff Ben," she hissed, "Then just kiss me!"
And he did. He kissed her with all the hunger of a man starved, quenching his thirst against her lips, and she realized with a shudder, that she would endure another five thousand lonely nights on Jakku just to be here in his arms again.
Their kisses were frantic now, not fast enough, not deep enough, not enough of each other.
And Rey felt…
Fear. Buried deep in the pit of her stomach, just there, was the fear. Fear of losing him. Fear of never having this again. Fear of him fading away into nothing. The weight of that nothingness down the Bond for eternity was enough to send her into another panic and she was raking her nails against the skin of his back, clinging so tightly that it brought a twinge of pain from him down the Bond.
An icy thrill of pleasure followed immediately, like a frosty arrow shot down their connection, it twisted her belly in anticipation.
The night itself seemed to respond under Ben's command and he lashed her wrists over her head with nothing but the cool touch of his Force. A thrill coursed through her remembering how he'd held her beneath the Great Tree just like this. But this time, pressed against the smooth leather of the couch and looking up at him, she saw no humor in his eyes, only hunger. Oh stars, this was what she needed.
And in the dim light, she watched a wicked smile unfurl across his lips. Rey forgot how to breathe in that moment, and she would have done anything to have him look at her like that gain. Immobilized by his Force, body screaming for his contact, she touched him the only way she could, with darkness. She let it shiver in cool rivulets across his skin until she saw its effect on his breathing, coming now in ragged panting bursts, cheeks heating with a delicious flush.
A touch, like a chill winter breeze danced across her skin as her shirt was stripped from her. Ben raised a brow in silent question and Rey breathed her consent. "Please. Don't stop."
And maybe Ben wasn't so clueless about all of this after all, because now, with darkness wrapped around them, humming and building like a waiting avalanche, Ben pulled off her leggings in one swift tug of the Force.
A quick thrill streaked through her as she realized how the darkness emboldened him, and she wondered if this is what it would have been like if she'd taken his hand in the throne room that day on the Supremacy. Had she missed out on a year of this?
He paused above her, his eyes soaking in her exposed flesh before he pressed down urgently on top of her, letting his Force continue to whip around her, like a storm, it swirled and lashed at her skin, as the hot skin of his body found connection with hers and she felt the hard center of his desire against her thigh. She worked at his pants and had them around his ankles with only a touch of the Force.
Oh, their masters would think them positively depraved, and Rey couldn't care less.
Ben looked down at her, flushed and panting, hair falling into his eyes and Rey thought he was the most beautiful thing she'd ever seen. Like staring at a missing piece of herself she'd only just discovered wasn't there. And with her arms still pinned helplessly over her head, in a place of complete submission, something fell into place.
Time stood still.
A strange déjà vu, like they'd done this before. Been here before. And it was as though the Force was speaking some ultimate truth, but she was just too wrapped up in the moment to hear exactly what it was saying.
Ben felt something too, as his brows knitted for a moment, and he released his Force grip on her wrists, before Rey felt the feeling pass and that all-encompassing ache began to devour any semblance of rational thought once more.
She demanded his mouth again, biting and sucking at his lower lip, pulling his shoulders closer with newly freed hands, giving him permission to smother her with his weight.
She sucked in a breath as his hard arousal finally pressed fully against her through his underthings, and kriff. She squirmed underneath him, moving so they were aligned and…
"Oh, Ben…" and behind his name was a command. Don't you dare leave, it said. Because Rey could not stand to lose him, her perfect equal. She could not lose this. Oh, that delicious friction as he kissed and sucked at her neck, all the while working himself against her, the heat and hardness of his body rubbing a delicious rhythm against her. She was soaked through her small clothes in a few very short, but incredible thrusts of his hips.
Kriff, she might find her release just like this. She groaned, reaching down to touch him like she had on Yavin, wanting more than he was giving, wanting so much for him to fill that ache inside of her. But he pulled away.
No, he said, scolding her with a guttural sound. No. He sounded more controlled the second time. Not like last time. Tonight, I want to show you what you mean to me.
When he removed his precious weight from her, she could have screamed and beat her fists against his chest. But he was the picture of perfect control, and she squirmed under his grip as he positioned one wrist over her head and unwrapped her breast band. This time, his hands didn't tremble at all. This time, she felt his subtle pull on the dark side to smother his insecurity, to steady his icy fingers, giving him an unnatural grace as he shed the clothing.
She watched his lips press together, as they always did when he was thinking too much.
Rey soothed him, caressing him with the black of the night itself, letting him feel how precious he was to her, stroking his shoulders in cooling streams of touch and he seemed to melt a bit at the edges, remembering his purpose and pulling the last of her clothing over her hips and tossing her underthings onto the floor.
He froze. As though just realizing what he had done and looked her up and down. The moonlight filtering through the windows made patterns on her skin, and he stayed there a long while on hands and knees over her, a worshipful softness in his eyes before he dipped down to capture her lips. Soon his mouth was exploring again, finding the tender skin of her neck, brushing lower as his hands found the curves of her breasts.
His lips razed her skin, leaving trails of tingling electricity down her chest and around each nipple, sucking and teasing until her hips rose to meet him, seeking the pressure of his body. She became keenly aware of herself in that moment. The rapid rise and fall of her chest, her pounding heartbeat, the increasingly painful ache between her legs. Oh, it was very uncomfortable now, and she pressed her thighs together to give herself a bit of friction, a sliver of relief.
She whimpered a wordless plea and this had him grasping her hips hard, his large hands nearly encircling her completely.
Thank the Force Ben was a merciful lover. Seeing her writhing underneath him, he brought his soft fingers down to her heat and slid them between her folds, finding that delicious center to her pleasure.
Ben Solo was a quick study.
His dark Force continued to batter against her like the cold winds of a cyclone, twisting and pulling and ripping, drawing pleasure from places she never knew could yearn for someone as his hand worked her and his Force pounded her with its power.
Rey was a bundle of sensation now, feeling nothing but his lips on her breasts, his hand stroking and building her desire, feeling his breath and hearing her own choked moans of pleasure.
She felt herself rise from the couch and she groaned in protest as his hand pulled away briefly, leaving her empty, needy. Ribbons of darkness trailed down her spine, teasing, and soon, they were joined by the caress of his own hands, stroking her everywhere. She flexed to clamp down on the painful pressure he'd built up between her legs and tried to focus on the new sensations he was igniting with his touch. Her body was suspended in perfect stillness as she felt his fingers drag from her shoulders all the way down to her legs. She was alive as he wrapped her in his dark embrace. She felt the very night swirl around her and his strong hands positioned her where he needed her.
She tried to stay still as his hot lips tasted her navel and trailed lower, kissing a path to her very undoing.
"Yes," she breathed into the night, into the darkness, to the only lover who could ever have her like this.
His mouth stilled near her inner thighs, his warm breath so close, his tongue building a relentless pressure in her core.
"Please." And she didn't want to beg, but this was a new kind of torture. How could pleasure be so kriffing painful?
She felt the briefest flash of trepidation down the bond, before he swathed himself in darkness again and pushed her legs apart.
And he kissed her, just like she'd commanded.
He kissed her just where she'd shown him under the Great Tree and he didn't stop. His tongue swirled delicious circles around the very center of her pleasure, again and again until she was bucking against him. She reached for his head, grabbing his hair and pressing him closer.
"Ben, please," she begged.
He listened to her cries, adding more pressure, working her with his tongue and with the Force, and when he added those lithe fingers, a cry tore from her, halfway between a shout and a moan.
His voice was everywhere in her mind as he used the Bond to communicate a perfectly formed sentence.
You are so beautiful like this.
That was when she realized he'd been watching her. His eyes intense, never taking his mouth from her, but watching as she came unraveled at his touch, at his command.
"It's not fair," she managed in gasps, thinking thickly through a foggy brain that she'd like to see him like this, too.
Then, suspended in midair in complete submission, Ben Solo turned her world upside down. All at once, his darkness bled away like fog in the bright morning sun. She felt his Force blazing with a warmth beyond just physical heat. It was belonging, it was comfort and peace, and it was as though the dawn had finally come, chasing away the fear and blackness of a long night.
The darkness he'd used to hold her warmed into a cradle of light and he smiled, pressing his mouth against her heat again until she lost herself completely.
He was pulling sensation from her, reading every thought down the Bond to guide his actions, and Rey abandoned herself to the rhythm he was teaching her body. The only thing that mattered were the hot circles of his tongue against her sex, his fingers pumping hard inside of her, stretching her with delicious stinging strokes of his hand, building a sweeping tension at her core. She moaned, arching her back and driving her hips to meet his mouth again and again, until finally, he took her to that precipice and suspended her there for a perfect moment. One last caress of his tongue pushed her over that edge and everything else fell away. Her release came shuddering from her core, tremors of pleasure and dark Force coursing through her, prickling her fingers and toes until she lay spent and panting beneath his gaze.
He kissed her tenderly one more time, his gentle lips sending a few last quivers through her body until she relaxed completely, breathing hard, feeling liquid and pliant in the support of his Force. He lowered her with tender care onto the couch and crawled in to lie beside her. The leather was a shock of cold against her burning skin and she grabbed for him, resting her head on one arm and draping the other over her to have as much of his body against her as she could manage.
Her breath was evening out, she was just coming back to herself as she realized his situation. He was straining hard against his underclothes, his own desire still quite obvious. She shifted her weight and pulled at his remaining clothing, but his hand caught hers.
No. His eyes were kind, but his brows were hardened into that stubborn slant that told her he would not relent. Let me give this to you tonight.
She was going to argue, but when he pulled her closer into his embrace, trailing warm wisps of Force down her back and shoulders, she melted into his arms, letting him soothe her.
Rey pressed a gentle kiss to the line of his jaw and settled into him further, closing her eyes, losing herself in the closeness of his body, his heartbeat, his breathing, the pulse of his Force.
"Ben," she said, her voice a feeble whisper. "I'm so afraid. I can't lose you."
You won't, sweetheart. And he was trailing soft fingers over her shoulders and arms, the warmth of his skin and his Force a balm to her ice-cold fear. You won't.
She exhaled and nestled closer, keenly aware of how perfectly she fit against him. "There was a gateway at Lothal that collapsed, but the Jedi who opened it thinks it can still be used."
Then you're right, we should go there and try. His fingers continued their soft repetitive strokes against her skin, as if trying to pull away the last of the fear that clung to her heart.
"Malak told me to meet him there," she said.
He was quiet at that.
I don't know the right answer. He finally said.
"Even if we do get through, how can we fight all of them?"
He sighed, a weary, ragged breath and she knew what it meant. He was so tired of fighting, just as she was. Maybe we don't have to, he said. What if we can open it just long enough for me to escape?
She could only hope it would be that easy, but something inside of her already knew. It wouldn't be. Whatever was coming was going to hurt.
Rey rolled onto her side needing to look at him before he inevitably faded away. She lifted fingers to sweep away the stray locks that had fallen to cover his face, combing through the soft tresses, appreciating the striking contrast that was Ben Solo. Hard lines and muscular angles, soft hair and deep brown eyes. Her hand caressed his cheek, touching the corner of his eye that would wrinkle with his smile. Where minutes ago, she'd seen icy power reflected there, now was a spellbinding warmth, endless liquid pools that promised her everything. Their depths held the kind of intense beauty that made her forget anything she'd feared. They wielded the power to stretch this personal moment between them into a shared eternity.
And for a few precious minutes, her fear was forgotten.
