A/N: The second part of my indulgent arachnophobia fic (which sounds so weird, but anyway). The first part, The One Thing Mara Jade Fears, is actually set in the future, so not necessary for the understanding of this fic, but definitely check it out!
"What is thy bidding, my master?" Vader knelt in front of Sidious's new throne in the Imperial Palace. More Jedi hunting, no doubt. Or perhaps intimidating politicians to do his master's bidding.
"I need you to instruct my new Hand, Mara Jade, in the basics of lightsaber combat," Palpatine said.
Vader instantly scowled. He had no desire to help train a Force-sensitive child that Palpatine might want to replace him with one day. Plus, he wasn't good with children. He never had been, and due to his own failures, he hadn't gotten to learn with his own son or daughter. But Palpatine had ordered, and so he didn't really have a choice. "Yes, Master." He stood up and stalked away, cape flaring behind him. This was not going to be fun.
Vader stared at his collection of lightsabers from Jedi he'd killed. Not that he was proud of his kills, but it was always handy to have extra lightsabers around, and the more the better. One of them would probably do for teaching Mara Jade how to fight, especially as Sith weren't expected to fight with low-power mode. Losing limbs was just another lesson for the Sith to draw on and use to sink into the Dark Side.
Something in him hesitated, though, to give a small child a full-powered lightsaber. The feisty redhead was, what—five? Not old enough to quite understand the implications of "don't touch—dangerous" and far too young to be coordinated enough not to cut something important with a big blade.
Plus, Vader knew nothing about Sith training. All Palpatine did to him was basically dressed-up torture, even if it did teach him things. And no way no how was Vader going to torture a five-year-old. What Vader did know was Jedi training. And Jedi used training lightsabers with children, lightsabers that only had low power.
Perhaps, for her sake, he should go with a full-powered lightsaber. Her life as a Sith assassin of Palpatine's would be far easier if she wasn't coddled now.
But with a full-powered lightsaber, she could not only slice off important bits of herself, she could slice off important bits of Vader as well.
Vader sighed. As much as he hated returning to the building, he needed some supplies from the Jedi Temple.
Armed with an arsenal of training lightsabers, several training remotes, and a training helmet, Vader stormed into the training room, where he had instructed Mara Jade's caretaker to leave her. The small child stood in the middle of the room, her two red braids trailing down onto her tiny black jumpsuit. She crossed her arms, staring at him.
"You're late."
"Sith Lords are never late," Vader said. "You are simply early. Consider this a test of your patience. You have failed."
Mara scowled and stomped her foot. "That's not fair!"
"Life isn't fair." Vader deposited his bundle near the wall and extracted a training lightsaber. "Catch, little one." The nickname slipped out before he could help it. He mentally bashed himself on the head. He couldn't act like he cared about her. She was a threat, and not his child. His child was gone forever.
Mara caught the training lightsaber, then fumbled. It clattered onto the ground. "Oops." She stooped and picked up the lightsaber, then glared at him. "I didn't fail that test! It slipped!"
Vader picked up a training droid and activated it. "Now, let's begin the lesson."
Teaching Mara was far more fun than Vader had expected. Watching her continually miss the bolts and hop on one foot, holding her stinging foot in the air or rubbing her stinging behind, swearing the tamest swears he had ever heard made him want to laugh out loud. He would have to teach her proper swears. Those were pathetic for a servant of Palpatine. "Reach out with the Force," Vader said. "Feel the bolts coming."
"It's not that easy!" Mara complained. "You try it!"
"I do not need to," Vader said. "I have learned this technique already."
Mara threw her helmet on the ground. "I hate it. It's stupid."
"Very well." Vader pulled his lightsaber from his belt. "If you are displeased with this technique, then let us see how you fare against a real opponent." He technically wasn't supposed to have a low-power mode on his Sith lightsaber, and he had fully intended to build his Sith lightsaber in a completely different design and with completely different features than the Jedi's lightsaber, but when he emerged from his half-trance, he had realized he had built the exact same lightsaber he had had before, just bigger for his prosthetic hands and not blue. He—the Jedi, that is, not him—had built so many lightsabers, rebuilding his design had become habit by now.
He turned the power on his lightsaber all the way down and activated it.
Mara visibly swallowed, tensing up, but she squashed down the fear that tainted the air and stepped forward. Her first strike was clumsy and directed far upward, easily blocked, but she had actually swung, which was more than Vader was expecting.
He brushed the strike aside. "A valiant first effort, but far lacking."
Mara gritted her teeth, wrinkling her tiny nose, and swung again. This time, her clumsy strike swung far wide of his body, barely grazing the padded sleeves covering his prosthetic right arm. Vader didn't even bother blocking it.
"A clumsy strike, one that leaves you wide open," Vader commented.
Mara swung the lightsaber the other way, just as clumsily and barely missing his left arm. He swayed out of the way.
"You are not even trying to hurt me," Vader said. "In a real fight, you must strike first and strike hard and go for the kill, or you will be killed."
"Then stand still so I can kill you!" was Mara's illogical response.
A small figure skittered in the side of his vision. Alarm bells rang in his mind. He scrambled back as fast as he could. His heel caught on the hem of his cloak and he flew backwards, his lightsaber falling out of his hand and deactivating automatically. He fell hard to the ground, helmet clanking against the floor. Mouth dry, he pushed himself up, frantically scanning the floor.
There it was, right near his feet. A spider. His heart beat a rapid tattoo. It was heading straight for Mara's bare feet!
He sprang up and grabbed Mara, leaping over the spider and sprinting across the room. Mara squeaked and dropped her lightsaber, wrapping her arms around his helmet. Finally, safely at the door to the room and a quick exit, Vader stopped. He would be panting if he were able.
"What was that?" Mara asked. She wrapped her legs around his torso and pressed close to him.
"A spider." Vader set a heavy hand down on her back. She was here. She was safe. He was safe. They were both safe.
"What's that?" Mara's voice rose.
"It is a very dangerous creature you must stay away from at all costs," Vader warned. Kitster had heard about the dangers of spiders from an old spacer and relayed them to the Jedi. Very useful knowledge to live by. "A single drop of poison from a spider will send you into rigid death syndrome, an incredibly painful way to die. Not only will they poison you with one bite, simply brushing against them will send the poison into your bloodstream."
Mara squealed, hugging his helmet tightly. "Kill it! Kill it with the Force!"
"I cannot," Vader said. "If I were too slow, it would have the opportunity to spit poison at us before it died, and it can spit poison up to a thousand paces away."
The spider skittered towards them. Vader stiffened, his arms tightening around Mara Jade. Mara screamed, pushing up on his torso with her feet, attempting to climb higher.
The spider was coming much too close for comfort. Vader fled the room, gesturing to the red-robed Imperial guards flanking the door outside. "There is a spider inside that room. Kill it." There was a good possibility he was sending them to their deaths, but it was a worthy sacrifice. The Imperial Palace would be safe once more.
The two guards straightened and saluted. "Yes, Lord Vader," they said in unison, spun on their heels, and marched into the room.
Vader stood before Palpatine, Mara still clinging to his helmet. "Our training session was interrupted by a spider."
Palpatine raised his eyebrows. "I see. You are dismissed, Lord Vader."
"Very well." Vader spun and left to return Mara Jade to her apartments.
Palpatine sighed and rubbed his forehead. Vader's stupid arachnophobia was not a fight worth having.
A/N: I regret nothing.
