Sidenote: Sorry for changing the update date several times without notice! I just couldn't wait any longer to resolve this mess. I care about these guys like they're my own friends.
CHAPTER 12: The Bridge
It was a late evening at the end of December, so the roads weren't particularly crammed. A random car would pass by every once in a while, and even less pedestrians. The feeling of emptiness was growing even greater when it began to snow, making the general visibility worse and worse by the minute.
So lonely, her inner voice sneered at her. There is nobody to stop you. You know this has to happen.
Miku was too exhausted to argue. Not physically; she was tired of the constant feeling of fear, hopelessness, anxiety -and loneliness.
With the hood of her plain dark blue hoodie pulled over her forehead, she was mechanically moving forward, aimlessly roaming through the streets and letting the darkness consume her. In the end, she was able to find solace in it. It was the only thing that had always been certain in her life, the only thing that really felt like an actual part of her.
And yet, something else in her was still holding on. Even though she knew there was no coming back -she wrote a message to everyone who meant a damn thing to her to say goodbye and she left all her personal belongings back at her aunt's house. There was no turning back. But still, she wanted someone, anyone, to come after her and stop her. She needed to be saved, or rather to be proven wrong. She needed to hear that her life has meaning, that it's going somewhere better.
But nobody came.
And nobody ever will, either. You are nothing, and you deserve to be nothing.
Miku was too dried out to cry anymore. She distanced herself from any emotions. Even trying to remember all the times in her life when she screwed up -or when she had something precious and lost it -felt as distant as though she had seen all of it in a crappy movie a long time ago. There was just an empty undefined void inside her now.
Useless things don't deserve to exist.
This was the last test. If she was meant to be saved, someone or something would save her on that evening. And if not...
At least this was finally a good decision to make.
Miku looked to her right: there was a bridge standing over the river and connecting two halves of the park surrounding it. She sighed and turned her steps towards it.
Whenever Luka later tried to describe what happened that night, her memories were kind of blurry, but she always said that a superior entity must have been present among them.
The first miracle was that she and Kaito were at the time visiting the city of Asahikawa which was less than two hours away from Sapporo. Had they been all the way in Tokyo with their families, they never would have been able to make it in time; but the two of them were, after the stress of the last month with the Vocaloids, trying to spend at least a few days as far from everything as they could.
It was the end of December, which meant that the Asahiyama zoo in Asahikawa started doing the penguin walks -literally just the zoo's penguins going for a walk through the area. It was one of the most adorably amazing things Luka ever saw, and it was even more precious to her to see Kaito smiling ear to ear -a rather rare occurrence ever since his breakup with Miku.
As per usual, Luka was trying her best to help him get back on his feet. One day at a time, she managed to make Kaito feel somewhat better, but it was still a work in progress. At least this time, he could actually be sure that getting over Miku was the only reasonable thing to do, since she made it clear that there is no possible future for them. He explained to Luka that he subconsciously knew it before, but needed to hear it from his girlfriend to start believing it.
In the evening after they came back to the hotel from the zoo, Kaito passed out in his bed while Luka sat on hers at the opposite side of the room trying to read The Master and Margarita, an old novel that Naomi recommended to her. The story was a bit chaotic at the beginning, and she lifted her gaze every once in a while because Kaito's barely audible snoring was preventing her from spacing out entirely. She couldn't help but smile; the boy looked so cute when he was asleep.
Stop this, girl, she called herself out. We've already been there, you know where thinking these things would lead you.
Her phone vibrated on the nightstand. Luka took a peek at it: she saw she had a message from Miku. She almost considered not even looking at the message, she was still upset with her. But eventually she thought that she could at least read it. She didn't have to text back unless it was something really important.
What she saw in that message caught her completely by surprise.
"Kaito!" she spoke up, and when the boy didn't immediately wake up, Luka jumped up and forward and shook his shoulder. "Kaito!"
"Wha..?" he mumbled, opened his eyes and smiled at her -and then he frowned again when he saw the look on her face. "What's the matter?"
Without a single word, Luka handed him her phone. Kaito stared at Miku's goodbye letter, and his face was slowly turning pale like sugar.
"No..." he whispered, and his breathing was getting heavier and heavier. "This... this can't be happening!"
"Kaito!" she grabbed him by his shoulders and forced him to look at her. "Please, don't panic. I'm gonna try calling her, and if she doesn't answer, we'll call the police. It's gonna be alright."
Just as Luka suspected, Miku's phone didn't answer -she must have turned it off. On top of that, Kaito -who had in the meantime checked his own phone to see that the exact same message had been delivered to him -suddenly received a call, apparently from either one of the twins.
"Yes, we just read it," he said. "Luka is here. Yeah. I know. I know! Listen, just... I don't know. It's..."
"For fuck's sake, gimme that!" Luka pulled the phone from his hand and put it next to her ear. "Hello?"
"Luka?" Rin's trembling voice spoke up in the speaker. "What... What are we..."
"Honey, I need you to focus, ok? Where are you right now?"
"At Ichiro's place. Me and Len both."
"Okay," said Luka. "I want both of you to go home ASAP. Stay there, and try calling Miku every once in a while. Leave the rest to me and Kaito, we're gonna call the cops and we'll keep you updated, got it?"
Rin sniffed. "Okay. But... I'm scared..."
"Me too, honey. But please, stay strong, ok? For me and for Miku."
"...ok."
Luka hung up. "Kaito, do you have a number for anyone in the management?"
"Uhh," he stuttered; "no, I don't."
"Shit, me neither. You know what," she gave him his phone back; "please call the police, you know Miku better than I do. I'll call Meiko, she's in touch with everybody else."
Kaito just sat at the bed staring at the phone screen. "I... can't. I don't know what to do."
"Dude. Look at me." Luka kneeled in front of him and took his hand into hers. "I know you're scared, but I need your help right now. And so does Miku. You can freak out all you want after we do all that we can to save her. So please-" her grip tightened a little bit before letting go. "Call the fucking cops, okay? Tell them as much as you can: what she looks like, where she lives, and any details that might help lead them to her.
Oh, and," she added before dialing Meiko's number; "please ask them to be as discrete as possible. The last thing we need is the news to get involved in this."
In the future, Luka had no idea how she and Kaito were able to pull it all off. The boy somehow managed to tell the police what they needed to hear; the officer promised to call back with any news. Their first stop was about to be at Miku's house, somewhere right between Sapporo and the smaller city of Ebetsu; at least this time the singer was obligated to spend the holidays there so the police were able to look up exactly where to go.
Meanwhile, Luka was on phone with Meiko who promised to contact the management.
"Thanks a ton," she told her. "I wish we could do more. I would run into a blizzard for her, but me and Kaito are stuck in Asahikawa."
Meiko was quiet for two seconds before replying.
"You know, Sammy lives in Asahikawa with his fiancée. I could ask him to drive you over to Sapporo if you wanted."
"You would do that?" she exclaimed.
"Sure. I think you should definitely go. You two are the only ones at least remotely nearby."
"You are just the best, Mei!" Luka smiled lightly. "And if Sammy is willing to help us, I'll pay at least a hundred drinks for him."
Thirty minutes later, she was sitting on the backseat of Sammy's car looking at the back of Kaito's head. The stage manager, otherwise very vocal, was upset and barely said anything. At first, Luka thought he was grumpy because he had to be a taxi driver for the two, but after a while she realised Sammy was just worried about Miku.
On the road, the police contacted them again. Miku was not at her home; this apparently came as a complete surprise to her aunt who claimed she didn't even hear her leave the house. The cops were at the moment calling in reinforcements to search the city and its surroundings. So far, no random citizens had called to report witnessing a suicidal teenage girl, which was at the same time good and bad news. The twins have called a couple of times too, either to tell them that Miku's phone was still unavailable, or to just hear some comforting voices. Luka was guessing they were probably dying of anxiety back in their home.
It wasn't until they were on the road for about twenty minutes that Luka's adrenaline rush finally faded away. Now that there was suddenly nothing left to do but sit and wait, she realised she wasn't able to recall much of what she had just done. Apparently she organised the search operation without even thinking straight. She knew right away what had to be done, and when it all came back to her, she suddenly became frightened. She was able to put the fear for her friend's life aside for the time being, but suddenly, when she wasn't occupied anymore, the thought finally reached her.
Miku was about to kill herself.
"What's your plan now, anyway?" Sammy suddenly asked. "Now that we know she's not at home, are we just gonna drive all over the city until we somehow find her?"
Neither Luka nor Kaito were able to answer that at first. The girl sniffed quietly.
"I don't know," Kaito finally muttered. "But we... need to at least do something."
Luka realised that her heart had been pounding hectically against her ribcage as if it was trying to escape. She buried her face in her hands and shut her eyes close.
"By the way, Luka," the boy addressed her from the front; "the cops said that Miku's aunt didn't know she was gone... Does Miku not live with her parents?"
She didn't answer -she was too busy trying to cry silently so that the guys wouldn't notice.
"Oh, come on, Luka!" she heard his voice in front of her; she lifted her gaze and saw that Kaito was looking at her with forced encouragement. "Please don't cry. Miku will be alright. We'll make sure of it."
At that second, Luka wished for nothing more than for Kaito to be sitting next to her and comfort her.
Some fifteen minutes before entering Ebetsu, close to midnight, the police had called once again.
"They found her," said Kaito after he hung up, but his tone implied that it wasn't over yet. "On the Ishikario bridge. She's... still... up there..." His voice faded away.
"Ishikario," Sammy repeated. "Is that the one over the Riverside Park?"
"Jesus, I don't know!" Luka retorted. Kaito only shrugged.
"It's okay. I remember, it's the one," their driver reassured them. "Let's see if we can make a difference."
Luka started to feel more nervous than ever before -and probably even after. In her head, she tried to come up with some kind of speech to help Miku realise just how much she cares about her and how taking her life is a horrible idea. But she couldn't come up with anything, the anxiety was effectively blocking all the smarter brain cells that night.
Suddenly, flashing red lights were right in front of them. A police car was standing at the Ishikario bridge's beginning, and two officers were right next to it -a thin young man and a sturdy grandpa with a gray mustache. A handful of bystanders were there, keeping their distance from the cops and watching what the heck was going on -it was apparent that they had been forbidden to cross the bridge. When Sammy pulled over, Luka could clearly see two shadowy figures up on the bridge. One of them was just standing there; the other one, comparatively small, was sitting on the railing with their feet dangling in the air.
"Miku!" Luka shouted and basically fell out of the car before it even fully stopped. She walked swiftly towards the police officers who were eyeballing her curiously. "Excuse me, can I go up there?"
"I'm sorry," said the grandpa. "The bridge is currently closed. There's a situation-"
"I know there is!" she interrupted. "It's my friend up there! We're the ones who called you in the first place!"
The officers looked past her to see Sammy and Kaito approach the scene as well.
"Well," the policeman's mustache shook as the man smiled softly. "If you speak the truth, we are more than grateful for your notice. You might have just saved your friend's life."
Luka smiled back bashfully. "So, can we-"
"I'm afraid not. Do not worry, we have the situation under control."
Her smile faded away immediately. "Under control? She's still up there and ready to jump!"
"We have our man talking to her," the younger officer said. "He will get her down here safely."
Luka didn't give up. "But we have to talk to her! We're her friends, and..."
"We understand that, and we're sorry," said the grandpa and briefly placed his hand on her shoulder. "The guy up there is a trained professional, he knows how to talk to... your friend. If anything so sudden happened like you running up to her, she might still panic and let go. It's for the best if you just put your trust in us."
"But..."
"Please go back to your car and wait if you want to. But do not interfere."
"Yeah, 'running up to her' my ass," Sammy mumbled as the trio returned to the vehicle. "They probably just fear we might say something stupid and fuck up." He opened the car door, dug up a pack of cigarettes and closed the door again. Then, he turned around and walked a few feet to the side while lighting one of his cigarettes.
"Well," Kaito sighed. "Not what I was hoping for, but at least we're... we're not too late."
Luka wasn't really paying attention. She slid down by the car's side and sat down on the road. Tears we running down her face again. "Why..." was all she managed to say before she started sobbing aggressively.
Kaito was right in front of her in a second.
"Don't worry," he told her. "They've got this. I trust them."
"That..." she gave a hiccup. "That's not... W-why did we even... come here... if we c-can't... do anything..."
The boy scooped closer and held her protectively; she held on back to him like he was the sole weight keeping her from floating away.
"We're here," he said; "that is what matters."
Luka nodded, accidentally wiping her eyes on his coat.
"Did you hear that?" Kaito continued and caressed her back. She shook her head -she was frankly too distracted to care about her surroundings. "The officer was telling someone on the radio that we're here. Describing us. Maybe that guy up there will tell Miku that we came."
"Let's... h-hope..." she mumbled, a tiny bit reassured.
When she calmed down, the two of them stood up and walked up as close as they could, silently watching the two figures on the bridge. It took an awfully long time and seemingly nothing happened -except they eventually noticed that the officer was slowly, bit by bit, moving closer and closer to Miku. Of course they couldn't overhear what the two were talking about, but apparently the girl was getting more and more comfortable with his presence. In the meantime, the policemen in front of them were talking with someone on their walkie-talkies; Luka and Kaito were able to deduce that there was another police car at the opposite side of the bridge, along with an ambulance -and Miku's aunt.
It felt like an eternity before the man on the bridge came close enough to softly grab the girl by her waist, carefully pull her back and sit her down safely.
Luka felt like cheering, but given the circumstances, it wouldn't have been appropriate. In any way, an enormous weight has been lifted as fast as a fingers' snap.
"She..." the girl said quietly, afraid she still might be speaking too soon. "She's alright..."
Next to her, Kaito breathed out with relief and placed his arm around her waist. "She is. See?"
Before she knew it, Luka was hanging on his neck again and crying for the third time that night. Only this time, her tears were happy.
