Notes: I wrote this for Kinktober 2020, the prompt 'bruises'. So I was going to write a piece about bruise worship, which this sort of is, but it went much deeper. I will try to come up with something kinkier and more fun another time XD
"How does that feel, angel?" Crowley asks, soaking his washcloth completely, then wringing it out over Aziraphale's scalp. "Too hot? Too cold?"
"Neither." Aziraphale hums happily with eyes shut. "It's perfect. Sublime, I should say. Like soaking in a nice, warm cup of tea."
"We've added enough dried flowers and wot not that you could just be," Crowley comments, swiping a hand through the water, swatting at a cluster of rose petals, lavender, sweet jasmine, and chamomile.
"Hmm. Then you could drink me," Aziraphale says, sinking deeper into the steaming water.
"Ngk … I … I could …" Crowley stumbles, but he recovers, a triumph since that remark from his angel almost had him choking on his tongue. "But let's save the sweet stuff for later, eh? We've gotta get you fixed up."
"Yes … let's. Then … I can do you …" Aziraphale mumbles, drifting off, his cheeks rosy from the warmth and the company. Crowley soaps up his cloth and runs it over Aziraphale's arm, sliding past a mark that has blossomed considerably since he last saw it. He runs the cloth over it again and it seems to darken, the cream-colored suds rinsing into cloudy water and revealing a plethora of purples swirled together, related to one another by hues, tiny freckles sprouting along the fringe like shy violets.
A galaxy of them really.
Crowley isn't normally fond of scars and bruises, especially on his angel. Aziraphale bears many types of blacks and blues, with varied stories behind them. Older scars on Aziraphale's corporation - ones following mortal paths and having faded to silver - come by way of other angels who delight in his suffering. Crowley has seen every one of those, categorized their existence, set their placements to memory. A touch of his fingertips tells him when they were created … and by whom.
Crowley has gathered a list of enemies on his angel's behalf, and that list is long.
Very long.
Not all of angel's bruises are visible to the naked, mortal eye, but they've dimmed his aura considerably.
Crowley never thought the humans' quarantine would get to Aziraphale. Being locked inside, forbidden to go out and socialize, leaving him heaps of time to read his books, seemed like a dream come true. With no one coming into his shop to browse, there was nothing keeping him from doing his crossword puzzles till his heart's content. And it seemed that way for the first few months.
But it didn't stay that way.
More and more, Crowley would catch his angel sitting in a chair by the window, staring up at the sky, sighing deeply as if for a long lost love, which seemed utterly preposterous to Crowley since every book Aziraphale could ever want lay in a stack beside him. Aside from that, he had his music. And cake! Why, they'd been baking cake every single day! So much cake, in fact, that any poor soul who so much as poked their head out of their door received a cardboard baker's box packed to bursting with confections, passed along at a socially safe distance courtesy of a long, wooden shepherd's crook.
And thanks to a wonderful service with a mildly vulgar name, whenever Aziraphale so desired, a delivery person dropped by with a box of his favorite sushi, which Crowley generously tipped for.
But Aziraphale still wasn't happy. And he was becoming less happy by the day.
Something had changed.
He mentioned several times to Crowley that he felt hemmed in; that lately, being locked inside made it difficult for him to breathe. He longed to walk through the park, soak in the sunshine (when it made itself available), and feed the ducks again.
Crowley didn't understand it. Aziraphale despised exercise to such a degree that if he sat at Crowley's kitchen table, preparing to sup, and discovered that he'd left the butter in the fridge, he'd rather do without then to get up and fetch it.
It wasn't until days later, when Crowley found a stack of newspaper clippings hiding underneath Aziraphale's ledger, that he began to catch on:
Covid cases increase rapidly as next steps planned
'Tier Three' Covid restrictions in announcement on Monday
M ore than 80% of positive UK cases in study had no core symptoms
It wasn't the toll quarantine was taking on Aziraphale. It was the toll this disease that caused the need for a quarantine was taking on the humans he was so fond of. That time spent staring at the sky, Aziraphale spent praying, wondering why the Almighty would let this continue, let so many of Her beloveds die and for what?
From the expression on his angel's face after, Crowley assumed he got no answers.
It was like the Ark all over again, only without the refreshing rain, and with no rainbow in sight.
Determined to take his mind off of it, Crowley arranged a private movie marathon for his angel at his flat. They sat on his sofa with homemade snacks and watched some old Errol Flynn movies. And it worked! After a while, Crowley started watching Aziraphale more than the film, his angel that much more entertaining. Aziraphale had started the way he watched every movie - sitting primly upright, hands folded in his lap, eyes glued to the screen. But over time, he'd started to inch forward, lean in, muscles twitching to recreate the fight scenes - the swipes of a sword, the parries, his feet shuffling enthusiastically in place to mimic the steps of the actors' retreats like they were performing a gavotte.
Encouraged that this was a way to break through Aziraphale's melancholy, Crowley recommended they dig out the old fencing foils and have at it, sans protective gear in honor of old Errol. Besides, they didn't need it.
"Oh! No, no, no!" Aziraphale argued at first, even with a smile on his lips. "I couldn't! It's been so long!"
"Nonsense!" Crowley retorted, heading for his closet. "You were an expert swordsman centuries ago. I'm sure you'll do wonderfully now. It's like riding a bicycle."
"And how's that, dear?"
"Once you fall off, you get right back on." Crowley tossed Aziraphale a foil, which he caught without looking, and Crowley smirked knowingly.
Crowley didn't give Aziraphale a chance to back out, didn't salute him like at the beginning of an official duel. Crowley came at him like a buccaneer, crowing and catching Aziraphale off-guard. But Aziraphale fought back. He wasn't upset by Crowley's abrupt start. On the contrary. He laughed at Crowley's antics, especially when he tried to evade by climbing over the sofa, and then onto an end table. His joy was infectious. It rang through Crowley's flat, made the plants (which had initially recoiled at the sound of clashing metal) stand straighter, wave their leaves and cheer. It rose up inside Crowley as if the joy were his own, making him laugh, too.
Laugh till he snorted, which he hadn't done in a long time.
But it didn't last as long as Crowley had hoped.
Aziraphale got lost somewhere in the fight, lost in thinking, his mind drifting in all directions while he dodged and parried by rote. His face grew tense, his expression morphing from concentration to anger … to vengeance. He went after Crowley with clouded eyes, as if everything pent up inside him - the sadness and the anxiety - had found a weak spot in Aziraphale's armor.
And now, it was starting to break through.
Crowley didn't know who Aziraphale saw when he looked at him. Those world leaders who didn't take this pandemic seriously, who didn't act quick enough, who were greedy.
Beelzebub and the Dukes of Hell, whom Aziraphale credited for the speed in which this disease took hold, and the blind, stubborn stupidity of those who refused to do their part to stop it.
Gabriel, who has long since laughed off any correspondence Aziraphale has sent him regarding the matter, rejecting the last dozen with a very snarky 'Return to sender!' emblazoned in gold across the envelope.
Or the Almighty, who has the power to stop this but who has refused, and doesn't have the decency to tell him why.
Or maybe he simply saw Crowley, who treated the whole thing like a joke, not only taking a nap for the first few months but then extending it, leaving Aziraphale alone when he might have needed him most.
Aziraphale attacked, closing in on Crowley fast, fighting with more fist than blade, and Crowley defended.
They struck one another at the same time - Aziraphale bringing his wrist down on the bridge of Crowley's nose, Crowley's guard-covered fist coming up to block and accidentally clocking Aziraphale on the jaw.
Both stumbled back, seeing stars.
Had they been human, Crowley's nose would have broken, and Aziraphale's jaw would have shattered. As was, Crowley's nose ended up a bit crooked till a minute ago when Aziraphale snapped his fingers and set it straight. Aziraphale's jaw still sported an indigo bruise reminiscent of a mum.
"Oh … oh my dear boy! I am so sorry!" Aziraphale apologized profusely when he saw Crowley's nose, blood pooling underneath.
"Wot?" Crowley sniffed, wiping his Cupid's bow with the back of his hand, examining the stain left behind with swimming eyes. "Oh, this? It's nothing. Barely a scratch. Think nothing of it."
"But … but …" Aziraphale stuttered, on the verge of tears. He dropped his sword, almost dropped to his knees, too, but Crowley hurried forward and gathered him up, wrapped him in his arms and held him.
"It's all right," he whispered, hugging Aziraphale tight. "It's going to be all right, angel."
"Do you … do you really think so?"
"Yes," Crowley said with a sigh. Whether he did or not didn't actually matter. But no one, angel or human, was going to get through today and on to the next if they didn't believe it was at least possible. Crowley had to hold Aziraphale together, even if he did it with lies. He had to keep the one angel left on earth who still cared going. "I do."
That's when Aziraphale's tears began to fall.
Crowley held him.
An hour went by, and Crowley held him.
Crowley declared Aziraphale the winner, and as a reward, offered to give him a bath and miracle him healed.
But when he got his angel naked and saw the bruises glowing on his skin, he hesitated. He shouldn't be attracted to them. He shouldn't find them appealing. On top of being physical damage to Aziraphale's skin, some of them were bred out of despair. They should have repulsed Crowley, but they were actually glorious, like a small corner of impressionist art brought to life and tattooed on his skin.
Because not all of these new bruises, exploding with vibrant color and depth, were bad. They happened when Aziraphale was still smiling, still laughing. When his leg banged the corner of a table during a particularly rowdy retreat. When he tried to follow Crowley vaulting over the back of the sofa, misstepped, and landed on his knee. When their foils tangled together and Crowley accidentally kicked Aziraphale in the thigh in his effort to separate them. Aziraphale had watched Crowley fly backward, land on his heel, and spin three times like a ballerina, stopping in a perfect arabesque, just to then trip over air and land in a chair. Aziraphale threw his head back and laughed so hard, he walked right into Crowley's (blunted) sword, the flat tip leaving its circular shadow behind.
Those bruises …
Those are bruises of pleasure.
They run deeper than skin.
And Crowley is quite satisfied by that.
Crowley almost regrets his promise to rid Aziraphale of them.
But being the one who gets to heal Aziraphale is an honor all its own.
However, he realizes with a grin, there is a way to get them back.
He'll memorize these, too. Their exact locations.
And freshen them up later with his mouth.
