…
"Stop asking me if I'm okay...
…
-people-
"Hey!"
"Kyle, sit down."
"-yeah, I know it's crazy-"
"-I'll get a double please-"
-so many people-
"-NUMBER THIRTY-NINE!-"
"-that's us-"
A crash. People shouting. Laughing. Dishes clink together. Waiters call out orders. Noise. So much noise. Pressing, suffocating, pushing in on him from every direction.
-hands fly up to his ears, frightened, panicked-
"-NUMBER FOURTY-TWO!-"
Someone pushes past him, cussing when their drink spills. He stumbles, falls. Someone touches his shoulder, offers him a hand. He scrambles back, eyes wide.
"-NUMBER FOURTY-TWO?!-"
-his eyes squeeze shut, hands pressing into his ears, fingers digging into his head. Trying, trying, failing to block out the noise-
"Hey, kid. You okay?"
The movement in the restaurant has ceased. People are staring. Their stares pierce him, exposing him, pulling apart all his secrets.
-stop looking at me. Stop. Stop please-
"Hey. Hey it's okay. You're okay, see."
Something's taken his hands. Gentle. Kind.
-cruel-
Pulls them away from his head. He's bleeding.
-don't trust them-
"C'mon kid. Open your eyes. Can you do that for me?"
-eyes open. Slow. Hesitant. He can't see He can't see He can't!-
"Hey. Breathe kid. Breathe."
-and he can't breathe and he can't see and he can't!-
"Hey! None of that." The Voice again. Gentle. Admonishing. Kind. "Breathe. With me. In one, two, three...Out one, two, three. In..."
-knees uncurl. He breathes. Short, hiccupped breaths. He's safe here. He's safe-
The restaurant has started moving again. He moves to stand, stumbling slightly, and a hand shoots out to steady him. He flinches.
-relax. He's not going to hurt you. He's just a person. Just a person-
"Thanks." He leaves.
-footsteps behind him. Someone calls out, wait-
"Hey, you sure you're okay? You need me to call anyone?" He's standing straight. Most likely military. He was in front of him in line. He never did get his coffee.
-call someone? Call who. No one to call-
He shakes his head. He'll be fine. He can make it on his own. He can manage. "I'm good."
-he's good at bluffing. They don't have any reason not to believe him. Sometimes he wishes they did-
"Alright. As long as you're sure you're okay." He nods for confirmation, even adding in a smile for good measure.
-if only he wasn't so good at lying-
...
...I'm tired of lying."
...
