Disclaimer: I do not own the characters from Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman. The rights to those characters and to the show belong to the creators of the show, to CBS, The Sullivan Company and to A&E.

A Path Through the Dark

Chapter Two

Pulling the key out of the ignition, Michaela sighed loudly and laid her head back against the car seat. From here she could see that the bedroom lights were still on, a sure sign that David was awake. Michaela drummed her fingers against the steering wheel as she considered sitting here until the lights went off in the apartment above. An old familiar sense of guilt surged through her. This was not how she should feel about her fiancé. If he could just understand, she thought to herself.

Michaela had always been a private person and David knew that. Even before her father's death, David had wanted her to be more open with him. The need for privacy was not intended to be hurtful but rather it was natural, borne of a childhood spent mostly in the company of books. She was used to being alone with her thoughts. Michaela knew it would be an adjustment when she agreed to move in with David and it had been but she had learned to carve out time alone, adjusting fairly well. It was harder after her father's death, partly because David believed that she didn't need to be alone.

Michaela reached for her bag before opening the car door. She might as well get this over with. David had early rounds at the hospital so hopefully a few details of group would satisfy his curiosity and convince him she wasn't destined for the loony bin yet. Still her steps were halting as she dragged herself inside. She opened the door and stepped quietly into the apartment on the off chance that David was asleep with the lights on.

"Mike?"

She sighed quietly. "Yes."

David stepped out of the bedroom in just his boxers, a sight which normally made her blush but she barely noticed. His smile was genuinely warm. "Hey," he said. "How was your group?"

Michaela turned and attempted a weak smile. "It was good." As she said it, she realized she really meant it. She wrinkled her forehead turning both ends of her mouth down and studied him. "But you didn't have to tell Will I was coming," she scolded.

David tried to look innocent. He reached up and brushed a strand of hair behind her ear. "I'm very proud of you," he said, ignoring her last comment. He pulled her into his embrace and kissed her forehead. "Want to talk about it?"

"Umm… Sure but I need a shower first." David let go of her and Michaela moved into the bedroom. She shed her clothes in the laundry basket and then headed to the bathroom, keeping a few steps ahead of David and hoping this stalling tactic would work.

Unfortunately, she heard the bathroom door open as she climbed into the shower. "So tell me about it," David said, refusing to be deterred.

Michaela sighed but the sound was drowned out by the running water. "We all introduced ourselves and said why we were there. Then Will asked us to change one thing this week."

"Is that it?"

"Pretty much," Michaela replied over the sound of the water.

David chuckled. "You know this is like trying to drag information out of a teenager. Want to be more specific?"

Michaela picked up the shampoo bottle and squirted some into her hand. She waited until she had a good lather going to answer. "Well, there was this woman who was there because her sister died. And there was a man there whose wife had left him and a college student and his sister whose mom died recently. " She knew next came Sully but she decided to skip him for some reason. "There was a couple there who had repeated miscarriages and she just lost a baby at six months."

David pushed the shower door to the side and stuck his head in. "Not that they aren't interesting but I wanted to hear about you."

Michaela shrugged. "You know why I was there."

David shook his head and pursued his lips. "You know what I mean, Mike."

"I didn't say much really. I guess the best part was that I realized I am not the only person in this world who has lost somebody. That was sort of my own breakthrough tonight." Michaela quickly stepped under the water to rinse her hair, hoping this last statement would satisfy David.

"So which one is your buddy?"

Michaela felt her cheeks grow warm. "Buddy?"

"Will said he partnered up the people in his support group so that they had someone they could call when things got rough."

Michaela was suddenly intent on the conditioner bottle, her cheeks warming for some strange reason. "Oh right. Umm.. I got this guy whose wife died in a car accident a few weeks ago." She hesitated for a moment and then looked up at David. "You don't care that it's a guy do you?"

David shook his head. "I'm just glad you have someone you can talk to." The tone of his voice told Michaela he was glad it was anybody but him currently. "I mean someone who understands what you are going through." Michaela recognized the cover up but didn't say anything. David faked a yawn and tilted his head to the side as if to prove how tired he suddenly was. "Well I've got rounds at seven so I better head onto bed." He leaned in to give Michaela a quick kiss on the lips. "Night."

"Night," Michaela replied, finally remembering to blush at his closeness to her unclothed form. David gave her a wink and closed the shower door and Michaela instantly felt the tension leave her shoulders. Unfortunately the shameful feeling from earlier returned. She stood under the water now and just let it run against her tired muscles. The ring on her finger caught her attention and she looked hard at it. A year ago when David had asked her to marry him, she had been the happiest woman in the world.

A lump formed in her throat as she tried to resist asking herself if she still felt the same. So much had happened since then. She wasn't even certain she was the same person who had said yes. She hoped that once she could deal with the lingering grief things would go back to the way they'd been. But what if Sully was right? What if things would never be the same? She shook her head trying to erase that thought from her mind. Things would be alright, she told herself.

Michaela finished up in the shower and pulled on a robe. David was already in the bed, his breathing even and calm. A sigh of relief escaped her lips, glad that she didn't have to come to bed and pretend to sleep. She tiptoed across the room, stopping halfway when he stirred a little. There was nothing to fear though; he turned over, snoring soundly.

As she closed the bedroom door quietly behind her, she stretched her arms luxuriously almost giddy with her freedom. A large crooked smile appeared on her face as she made herself comfortable on the couch and pulled her tablet out of its case. She hesitated for a moment, feeling a little guilty about what she was planning to do but she quickly dismissed it, letting curiosity win.

The search engine turned up no webpage for Sully's business but she clicked on one of the yellow page listings for Custom Cabinetry. The page had over twenty reviews for the business, each more glowing than the next. Fine craftsmanship, finished ahead of schedule, would recommend for any kitchen remodel…. The reviews made Michaela smile because it confirmed what she had felt deep down. Despite his initial rude behavior, Sully was a good man.

Michaela logged into her facebook account next and wasted at least ten minutes doing search after search for Sully until she was convinced he wasn't on the social networking site. She was just about to give up when a name at the bottom of a search list caught her eye. Abby Sully. Michaela felt as if she was about to intrude on sacred ground but she reasoned with herself that it was necessary to find out as much about Sully as possible. He certainly wasn't going to volunteer much information.

With one touch of her finger she took her first step into his world. The profile picture on the page caught her attention. There was Sully, his face so different than the man she'd met tonight. The hard lines were not present, the mouth not set into a permanent scowl. There was a secret smile on his lips as he looked adoringly at his wife. Their hands were interlaced over her belly in a protective way.

Maternity pictures – something every college and medical school friend of Michaela's had done when they'd produced their first child. Somehow the pictures weren't as important for the second or even third pregnancy. They often served as reminders to Michaela of what she'd given up. Youngest chief of surgery in the country did not come without sacrifice.

Her eyes did not linger on the picture but moved quickly downward where friends and family had left messages about missing her and the prayers that were being offered for Hannah. The messages went on and on and Michaela quickly realized that Abby was the type of person that everyone loved. Then the posts switched over to before Abby's death, each one so full of hope and promise about their baby girl. There were pictures of the nursery and pictures of shower gifts.

Michaela let out a ragged breath, imagining how Sully must feel. How quickly hope had turned to despair. Michaela couldn't take anymore and she quickly set the tablet down. It was only then she realized that her cheeks were wet. It wasn't fair to think that someone so young, so loved had been ripped from the bonds of life. While she missed her father, she knew that he had lived a full life. He had raised his family and had an extremely successful career. Abby was just starting out and Hannah, hadn't even begun to live. Michaela pulled her knees up to her chest and buried her face in her robe to muffle the sound of her sobs. It was something David would not understand even if she told him these tears were not for her own grief.

The shaking slowly subsided and she felt a sense of peace envelop her. Michaela sat there for another twenty minutes or so, her head resting against her knees. She didn't want to get up; afraid she was going to lose the warm feeling growing in the pit of her stomach. For the first time in a long time, she felt as if she could be genuinely happy again. It didn't make sense but she didn't care. A small light had been turned on somewhere in the dark and for right now it was enough.


Thanks for reading and for the reviews. I always enjoy writing David because we only get brief glimpses of him in the series which means I can push the limits of his character a bit more than the others.