EarthyBendy: xP hopefully there aren't too many tears!

gemsofformenos: Indeed, that chapter was a heavier one. "The absolute silence of Azula only doubles the strength of the impact." Thanks! It was kind of harder to write this breakdown as I've never tried to write her having one in total silence. "You keep showing how Azula is still stuck in her old ways of thinking and how the lack of communication only increases her misery." Indeed, she knows that she ought to break those habits but she doesn't know how and it is very hard for her to reach out and ask for help. Since she physically can't explain what is going through her head. But yes, TyLee wanted to salvage their friendship and not their relationship but Azula took it the wrong way and so it hurt her very badly and made her feel like TyLee was doing it to hurt her. It is easy for her to think as much becuase that's sort of how she operates. "I love the fact that Zuko is there this time and that he desides to stay at her side this time." She needed to be cut a break somewhere so she has Zuko to try to help her through things. And yeah, in this case sending her away would do much more harm than good. He is kind of stuck on what to do, but he knows that not shipping her off is a good start. "It seems that Zuko is willing to start to fight harder for her healing." But yes, he does want her to get better. And he finally notices just how bad her inability to speak is. And thanks again! Best of luck to you with any future fics and IRL.

alesana4ever: xP I love me some angst though it's agonizing when I'm not writing it because I don't know if it will end happy. I say while not knowing what kind of ending I'm going to give this one lol. Tbh I don't think it's too morbid xD I do the same thing. The more it hurts emotionally, the better! I enjoy the gutwrenching stuff. And thank you :D I try to make the language of my fics immersive! And yeah, she did venture to a very dark place in her mind. But in this one, she and Zuko have a (while it isn't stable) a better relationship. They're trying to work through their issues. But yeah, TyLee isn't really to blame, she was in a situation that wasn't healthy for her and she had to get out of it. Azula needs to find stability before romantic love.

"Don't be angry with her, Mai."

"Don't be angry with her?" Mai asks. "Don't you see what this is? She's playing with you, she's trying to guilt you into coming back to her. This is another tactic."

Tylee shakes her head. "That was different Mai. She can't help that."

"She's not even trying to help that."

"I think that she is...was. She hasn't said anything to me."

"Yeah, because she either hasn't had the chance or is going for the cold shoulder method. Stop trying to defend her, she just hurts and manipulates you. She takes advantage of you."

TyLee squeezes her eyes shut, they are already growing watery and her head is throbbing. With stress and sadness and...confusion. And she can't take it anymore, can't take any of it anymore. "So do you, Mai!" She shouts. "You think that I don't know what I am to you!? I'm a rebound! I know that you guys think I'm…" she taps her head, "that I'm thoughtless and oblivious but I do know! I know that you wouldn't have kissed me if you weren't mad at Zuko."

"TyLee…"

"No!" She yanks her hand free. "You're just like her. You're like all of them. You all just use me." Her voice cracks and softens, "why do you all just use me?" She doesn't think that she needs an answer. She knows that it is because she has a pretty face and a puppy-eyed innocence. "Just...just leave me alone."

"Come on, TyLee. I really do love you."

"Only until you make up with Zuko."

"No." Mai insists. "If he comes back apologizing, I'll choose you."

.oOo.

She has gone entirely numb. She likes it that way. It is preferable so she clings to that numbness with a steely grip. Though she doesn't have to cling so furiously, she is simply too exhausted to feel anything but numb anyways.

Zuko rubs her back, up and down, up and down, up and down. It isn't a comfort but it is a constant. A constant that keeps her from slipping off and away again. "Believe it or not, I want you to be okay."

She doesn't believe it in the slightest.

"You…" He starts. "I don't understand you, Azula. One minute you're nice and caring and then it seems like you're trying to tear TyLee and everyone apart." She wishes that he would just stop talking. She can feel horrible about herself without his aid. "I can't tell if you really care about her-about anyone-or if you're just…" he pauses and shakes his head.

And that is just it, she can't tell if she truly cares either. She thinks that she might just be incapable of feeling care and love. She rolls over and bunches herself up. She is a vile person if she can be called a person at all. People love. People empathize. She doesn't. She is not a person.

"I guess it wouldn't bother you this much if you didn't care." Zuko finishes at last. Her heart quivers, she isn't sure if it is the good sort or the sickly sort. "Do you feel bad?" He asks. "For hurting TyLee? I need to know."

She thinks for a moment that he might not like the answer until she remembers that she has willed herself hollow to drive out the voices-inner and outer-that tell her she is rotten through and through. They surge back in and she knows that the sound she would have uttered would have been gross and choking. Instead she just covers her face with her forearms and claws at her scalp.

She hears Zuko take a sharp breath and he fights to untangle her fingers from her hair. She gives in and slackens her hold.

"I don't expect you to just," he snaps his fingers, "get better…"

She doesn't think that he expects her to get better at all. Not after this. Not when she had everything going for her. Not when she was on walking down the right track, well lit and perfectly free of obstacles, and still managed to leave that path for a more shrouded one.

"It didn't work like that for me either." He continues.

She nestles her head against the pillow.

"I don't think that it's healthy for you to stay here."

And there it is.

He laughs. "I don't think it's good for me either. We had a fight and Mai cheated on me…" He trails off. "I know that you're going to hate me more than you already do but this," he points at the crown. "Isn't all that great. Sounds fun to rule and have power but really everyone is just judging you and no matter what decision you make, it's wrong. And so you fight with your girlfriend…" He gives another bitter laugh. "I'm probably not helping am I? I'm making this about me."

She shrugs. She would much rather him talk about his own problems than throw hers back in her face.

"That's not what I'm trying to do. Maybe I should just say my plan instead of giving you the loaded backstory. Mai says that I have a problem with doing that." He rubs his hand over his face. "I think I just did it again too."

She flexes her fingers. She doesn't particularly mean it, but she is losing interest in his ramblings. She can feel herself falling away, retracting and retracting into that special sort of unfeelingness that she can swear exists halfway between life and death.

Her eyes feel so heavy, she should like to close them and keep them closed for as long as she can.

She wonders if he notices that she is slipping away because she feels his hand on her back again. The sensation of the fabric of her shirt against her back dances somewhere between unpleasant and soothing.

"I was thinking that we could go to Ember Island together. Like we used to when we were kids. I think that it would be nice to uh…" he rubs the back of his head. "Bond or something like that, I guess. It's a stupid idea, isn't it?"

She inhales deeply and forces herself up. She nods, it is the very worst idea she has heard. So horrid that she had to sit up and acknowledge it's awfulness. If Ember Island truly is a magical place that can smooth even the roughest edges, that has a way of helping one understand themselves, then it would do her well to stay as far from it as she possibly can.

"Would you go with me?" He asks in spite of her nod. "I don't want you to go through this alone, you already did that once."

Her stomach grows fluttery and her lower lip quivers. She resents him unremorsefully for driving the numbness out of her before she could truly bask in its comforts. "Let me help you again. It worked the last time."

She looks away from his helping hand. It couldn't have worked all that effectively if she is right back where she started at. If she hasn't truly left that place at all.

"This time we won't just hide the mess under the bed. We'll clean it."

She wishes that he would have picked up on Uncle's better metaphors. She presses her lips together and fixes her eyes straight ahead.

"I think that, maybe, part of the problem is that you're still in the same place. How can you change if you stay in the same place?"

She thinks that, that might just be it though; she doesn't want to change. She doesn't want to lose her essence completely. She realizes with another wave of discomfort, that nobody wants Azula, everyone wants an entirely new person. She doesn't want to be a new person. She can't be a new person. She can't even manage to tweak a single aspect of herself, not in any way that means anything at all.

She doesn't think that she has a reason to put in the effort. And a fool she has been for hinging all of her efforts on one person.

"Will you give it a try, I know that I could use some time away from here."

She points at his crown. She doesn't know how, but for once he gets it. Maybe it is just a lucky guess, "I'll let my advisor watch over the Fire Nation for a bit. He's good at what he does and if there's anything really pressing, he can just send a messenger hawk."

Azula crosses her arms. It is stupid and irresponsible among other things. Mostly, she just wants a solid excuse to say no. One that he can't refuse. She looks back at her palms and flexes her fingers. Maybe it would be a good idea to go off to Ember Island and disappear. She'll go. Go and then slip away when she gets the chance.

"I can have the servants help you pack your things." He tries.

She gives him an affirmative nod. She hadn't expected his face to brighten that much. He takes her hand. "This is going to be good for you. For both of us." He smiles. "I promise."