A/N: Your kind reviews and messages warmed my heart this week. I am glad that so many people are liking this story, and I am happy to continue writing in this fandom.
This chapter corresponds with episode 2x01 and like most previous chapters, it discusses some dark themes. I feel like some of what I wrote about in this chapter was mentioned on the show but never explored, and I think it's time it got some attention.

Once again, I'd love to thank my dear friend, blossom-of-snow (AKA bloom-and-grow-forever on FFN) for beta reading this story and giving me valuable writing guidance that really helps me deliver better storytelling. She's a super talented writer, too, so I recommend her fics.

The condo was dark and quiet when Sharon unlocked the door and came in. Five months ago this atmosphere would have been expected, but since Rainie has come to live with her, Sharon had gotten used to coming home to someone at the end of the day. Rainie had been at PAB earlier that day, to talk to DDA Emma Rios for the second time about the Philip Stroh trial. After Emma had called her a whorefan, Rainie had not wanted to do a second interview. Sharon had convinced her by explaining to her the importance of her role in Stroh's trial. She did not want to threaten Rainie's stability as Chief Taylor has when he has threatened to remove the girl from her custody. Doing that would be cruel and unnecessary. She knew that Rainie was an intelligent and compassionate girl and that even though the interview must have brought up some difficult memories, using reason would help her understand why she had to talk to Emma and testify against Stroh. After the second conversation with Emma, Rainie grabbed her car keys and left PAB without saying goodbye to anyone. She had not looked upset, but Sharon knew her well enough. The girl was an expert at hiding her feelings until she was somewhere safe where she could let herself fall apart. Unfortunately, Sharon could not follow her and had to work for several more hours. She tried texting Rainie but received no response.

The condo looked almost deserted, and Sharon wondered if Rainie was even there. She had called her name and heard no response. When she walked down the dark hall, she noticed a strip of light under the bathroom door.

"Rainie?" she knocked on the door. "Are you here?" When she heard nothing, she pressed the door down and cracked the door open. She could see the girl's freckled toes and her heart skipped a beat, her brain immediately playing the worst scenario. Sharon remembered the argument she had with Emma the other day, where she tried to explain to the young DDA that Rainie was at special risk for suicide because of what she's been through. Emma wouldn't hear of it. What if the interview with the insensitive DDA was too much for Rainie to handle? What if it pushed Rainie to harm herself out of desperation? She pushed the door open and burst into the bathroom, praying for the girl to be okay. She let out a relieved sigh when she spotted Rainie sitting on the floor, her back leaning against the bathtub. She was wrapped in a pink towel and staring at her hands.

"Sweetie, what's going on?" Sharon asked and kneeled in front of the girl who looked like she was on a different planet. It took Rainie a long moment to raise her eyes and focus her gaze on Sharon.

"I'll never have any friends," her voice was broken. The girl's face was pale, and when Sharon looked down, she noticed a pill bottle clutched in the girl's hand. Panic set into her body like an electric current, as she felt her breath getting caught in her throat. She took the bottle from Rainie and examined it. It was a bottle of Tylenol.

"Rainie, did you take any of this?" Sharon uncapped the bottle and tried to estimate how many pills were still left in it. It looked half full, but that wasn't encouraging since the bottle originally contained a hundred caplets.

"I'm sorry, Sharon," Rainie sighed. "I should have called you." Her voice was lethargic, and her face was devoid of any emotion.

"It doesn't matter now," Sharon tucked a stray strand of wet hair behind the girl's ear. "I just need you to tell me if you've taken any of this Tylenol."

"Yes," Rainie responded dryly. Sharon felt her heart racing in her chest and her breath getting caught in her lungs. Why hasn't she followed Rainie home sooner? How could she assume that after having to recreate her past of prostitution and sexual abuse the girl would be fine on her own?

"How many have you taken, Rainie?" Her hands were shaking, and she felt tears threatening to burst from her eyes.

"Two," Rainie replied. "I have a horrible headache. Why? What's wrong with them?"

"I thought…" Sharon's voice shook. "I thought the bottle was full." Rainie shrugged, and Sharon tried to hide the relieved exhale she had let out. Rainie suffered from tension headaches, and a day like today must have triggered a bad one. It was horrible, but not the worst thing, compared to what Sharon had thought happened until only a moment ago.

"I wanted to be alone," Rainie spoke quietly. "That's why I didn't call or text you back."

"It's fine. Everyone needs alone time sometimes," Sharon's voice was thick with emotion, and when Rainie gave her an odd look, she realized that she was failing miserably at hiding the distress she was trying to let go of.

"Are you okay?" the girl asked.

"It was just a rough day at work. I solved a difficult case," Sharon lied.

"Your job is crazy," Rainie sighed. Sharon nodded in agreement.

"Is your headache getting better?" she changed the subject.

"A little bit," Rainie said and pulled herself off the floor. Sharon also got up and put the bottle of Tylenol in the medicine cabinet.

"Are you hungry?" Sharon asked.

"Starving. I cooked pasta. I think I was able to replicate Lieutenant Flynn's Alfredo sauce."

Sharon wasn't sure why out of her entire team, Rainie had become close to Lieutenant Flynn, but it appeared that she enjoyed being around him and Provenza when she was in the Murder Room. After watching Rainie eat on the evening when he had cooked for them, Flynn made sure to bring food boxes for her and Rainie every time he cooked.

"That sounds great. Why don't you get dressed while I set the table?" she suggested and watched Rainie as she walked to her room. Sharon closed the bathroom door behind Rainie and leaned against the counter. She took a deep breath and then exhaled it slowly. The worry for the girl's well-being still gnawed at her. The fact that Rainie had not harmed herself today did not mean that she did not consider that or that she would not do so in the future. The girl had refused to talk to a therapist, and while it was important to Sharon to respect Rainie's red lines and boundaries, she was also concerned that the interviews and depositions towards the trial would emotionally wear the girl down. She did not doubt that Rainie was a strong girl, but even the strongest person could break down if put under extreme pressure. It was clear to Sharon that Rainie was not ready to come to terms with the abuse that she suffered. And forcing her to discuss that out in the open had the potential to inflict her serious mental damage.

Their dinner was somber, and afterward, Rainie excused herself to go to her room, not before she assured Sharon that she was exhausted but otherwise alright. An hour later when Sharon checked on her, Rainie was asleep. As she went into bed for the evening, she noticed a text message on her phone from Flynn.

"How's the kid doing?"

"It's hard to tell." She typed her response. "I didn't want to push."

"May I call you?" Sharon appreciated the fact that he had asked first rather than assuming she would be ready to accept his call. She typed an affirmative answer, and a moment later her phone rang. She picked up right away.

"Hi," she spoke quietly.

"You sound like you've had a rough time," Andy said. Sharon hummed in response. "Do you wanna tell me?"

"It's Emma. I thought she pushed Rainie to do something… irreversible," Sharon explained. Andy was quiet on the other side of the line. "She looked like she didn't even care about anything anymore."

"What did she do?" Andy asked softly.

"She had a bottle of pills in her hand, and she was staring at it. She said she only took two for a headache, but I don't know what she was thinking. It looked like she was considering to take more," Sharon's voice shook as she spoke.

"It sounds like a scary experience," Andy responded.

"I have never worried this way even about my children. I always trusted that they would come and tell me if something was wrong with them. But it's so much more complicated with Rainie. I don't want to smother her, but I also don't want her to get hurt. And for the first time in my life, I don't think I know how to balance the two," Sharon wasn't sure why she decided to confide in Andy, but for some reason talking to him about her fear for Rainie's safety felt good.

"I don't think this is something you should handle on your own. It sounds like Rainie might need professional help," Andy replied.

"She doesn't want it, and I don't want to force her. It wouldn't be a helpful process if I did," Sharon sighed. For the first time since Rainie came to live with her, she realized just how bad things could get if the girl cracked under the strain.

"It's a difficult situation, Captain. Don't feel bad for having trouble navigating through this." Somehow, Sharon found solace in the fact that he had not tried to offer her false comfort. Andy was not that kind of person. He did not downplay her concerns by telling her everything will be fine. He said it like it was and validated her disquiet. It shouldn't have made her feel better, but it did.

"Thank you," she said softly.

"For what?" he wondered.

"For listening," she replied. "I appreciate it."

"Anytime, Captain. It's the least I can do to thank you for not kicking me out of the force years ago," he said.

"My role was not to kick officers out of the force, Andy. My job was to make sure officers follow the rules," Sharon proclaimed.

"Oh, well, if you say so," Andy replied, and Sharon could almost see the grin that spread across his face. She had a feeling he misdirected the conversation that way so he could cheer her up a little. She couldn't deny that it worked. A stubborn little smile was curving the corners of her mouth upwards. He was the good kind of officer, even if he was a hothead. She would never terminate the employment of an officer like Andy Flynn. "Try to get some rest, Captain," he said.

"I'll do my best," she answered, and they wished each other goodnight before hanging up the phone. Sharon adjusted her pillows and lied down, feeling lighter than she had been before. Unloading some of her burdens had alleviated her worries enough so that she could let her mind rest for the night. Maybe once she awoke, she would be able to examine the situation with fresh eyes and a clear head. For now, she had let sleep spread its wide and welcome wings over her.

-TBC-

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