D: Why did star wars episodes 4,5,6 come before 1,2,3?
W: dude we both watched the 3 hour star wars documentary where they explained this
D: Because in charge of planning, yoda was
D: Wally
D: WALLY
W: WHAT
D: LOOK AT PAGE 46 OF THE iOS 7 TERMS AND CONDITIONS
W: ...
W: WTF?!
W: how did you even FIND that
W: today in science we had a sub and we was taking a third of the class outside at a time for part of this lesson, so while he was outside everyone flipped all the chairs upside down and formed a satanic pentagram in the middle of the room with yard sticks
D: go on
W: so I laid in the middle of it while everyone else acted like they were sacrificing me, then the sub came in and all he said was 'oh not again'
W: why wouldn't you just use a big magnet to find a needle in a haystack
D: cause setting it on fire was way more fun
D: next to roadrunner, R2D2 is the most censored character on tv
D: *beep big ding trill beeep whistle*
W: the hell did you just call me?
D: Do not reply to this message.
W: ok
W: ...dammit
W: its 3am and I'm making cheese quesadillas in a skillet cause the microwave will wake my parents up
W: My mom smelled the cheese so came down I'm making her a cheese quesadilla too
W: she laughed and woke my dad up
W: would you like to join me and my parents for cheese quesadillas
D: ...
D: sure ok
W: fricking camera on my phone
D: what
W: I'm trying to take a picture of the moon
D: lol
D: I feel ya bro
W: stop touching me
D: Im going to walmart for lucky charms
W: its midnight
D: theyre out of lucky charms
D: this is unbelievable
D: I came all this way for lucky charms, Im getting some lucky charms dammit
W: what do you daydream about
D: this conversation happening
D: "Alreeed!?"
D : "Whaat?"
D: "Where's my batsuit?"
D: "Whaaat?"
D: "Where. Is. My. Bat. Suit?"
D: and so on to the 'Greatest good you are EEEVER gonna get!' just in slightly different context
W: priceless
D: I have Dysania
W: what?! will you be okay?! what is it?
D: its the state of finding it hard to get out of bed in the morning
W: I THOUGHT IT WAS SOMETHING LIKE CANCER YOU DICK
W: I hate you
D: fandom poem challenge. go.
W: My eyes are green. His are blue. I deserve to be loved. I lost my shoe. - Supernatural
D: Not bad. My turn
D: His blood was red. His scarf was blue. If he doesn't turn up soon, I might have to jump too. - BBC Sherlock
W: DUDE
W: UNCALLED FOR
W: FINE YOU WIN
W: any luck?
D: well, the best of the best aren't available, so we're getting the best of the mediocre.
D: youre late.
D: Yeah, I have a plan
W: is it a good one?
D: I have a plan.
W: my mom and her friend were talking, and the lady said 'do what you love and the money will follow'.
W: so I ate some pizza, harassed a telemarketer, and took a nap.
W: and now I wait.
D: I'm exercising
D: did I say exercising I meant exorcising
D: Exorcizamus Te Ominis Immundus Spiritus Omnis Satanica Potestas Omnis Incursio Infernalis Adversarii Omnis Congregatio et Secta Diobalica Ergo Draco Maledicte Ut Ecclesiam Tuam Secura Tibi Facias Libertate Servire, Te Rogamus!
W: AAAAAAAHHHHHHHGGGGGIRAAHHHHHHHHIIIIIIYYYYYAAAAAAHHGGRUUUAAAAAOAHHHeEEHHHHh
D: banned from the zoo.
W: Again?
D: I'M RETIRED
W: what?
D: I was tired yesterday. I'm tired today.
D: I HATE ENGLISH
D: IS IT GREY OR GRAY
W: its grAy in America and grEy in England
D: ...oh
D: thanks
D: you promised not to tell
W: and Hitler promised not to invade Czechoslovakia.
D: in Calculus the other day my teacher was having a coughing fit and says, 'I THINK SATAN IS CHOKING ME' and I just went 'sorry' out of habit and he stopped coughing
W: this explains so much
W: I got 99 problems and 95 of them are due by the end of the week
D: the other 4 were due last week
D: makin my way downtown, walkin fast, haulin ass cause its COLD OUT
D: da dadada dada - and I'm freezing
D: da dadada dada - and snots leaking
D: Da dadada dada - and now I ponder...should I get to, Gotham Academy, or say screw it, and play hookie
W: STOP
W: I WAS DRINKING SODA AND LAUGHED AND SNORTED IT INTO MY NOSE
D: at least its not cocaine youre snorting.
W: IT BURNS
Authors note.
OKAY DONT BE MAD, I'm FINALLY back!
SHOUTOUT to cantorahagedoorn! Booyah, and thanks! I really wasn't planning on updating this story, but what the hell :)