A/N: As always, I would like to thank the awesome blossom-of-snow for her editing work.
I hope you enjoy this chapter!
Sharon didn't give herself the chance to examine her feelings in-depth, but for once in her life, she decided that it was worth the risk. Moving in with Andy may seem like a huge step in their relationship, but considering that they spent most of their nights together at either of their homes, living together full time wouldn't be that much of a change.
"Hey." Andy squeezed her hand as they walked out of the restaurant. "I'm really happy about this."
"Me too, honey," Sharon replied.
The sweltering June heat had waned by evening, as they walked to the parking lot hand in hand, Sharon leaned into Andy's side. Even though she was excited to merge her life with Andy's, Sharon was also aware that Rainie might have an issue with that.
"I can read your mind, you know," Andy murmured into her hair.
Sharon smirked. She knew Andy could read her like an open book. Ever since they started working together, he was conscious of her body language and the tone of her voice. That's why he made such a good work partner during her first years in Major Crimes. Since they started dating, he perfected that ability so that he could tell what she felt by the way she was breathing. Sometimes Sharon joked that Andy may have had telepathic abilities.
"I think we should talk to Rainie together," Andy said. "If we're going to live together, I want her to know that she can trust me and that I care about her."
"I'm scared of her reaction," Sharon admitted. "The last couple of weeks have been tough for her."
"She did seem moody the last time I saw her. What happened?" Andy asked.
"She told Heather about Gary's abuse and her time in the street. That didn't seem to go very well."
"Dammit," Andy groaned. "That creep ruined everything for this girl."
Sharon stopped walking and pulled Andy's arm. "Andy, if we are going to do this, you should understand that Rainie is still very vulnerable."
Andy unlocked the car and opened Sharon's door for her. "I know."
"No, I mean, she's still not capable of making it out there," Sharon said, leaning on the open door frame.
Resting his arm on the top of the door, Andy cocked his head. "What do you mean?"
"For the foreseeable future, Rainie is a permanent fixture in our house," Sharon explained. "She may be nineteen, but she's probably not going to move out anytime soon."
"I'm well aware that you and Rainie are a packaged deal," Andy said.
"And you're sure that is something that you can handle?"
"I want to be involved in your life, Sharon, and she is a huge part of your life and a great kid. So yeah, I am ready for living with you and Rainie."
"Okay," Sharon said, nodding resolutely.
Rainie was still awake when they arrived home. Even though they spent their ride home discussing how they wanted to tell Rainie about their decision, once they both stood in front of her, they both felt insecure.
Andy decided to make tea for all three of them, while Sharon initiated a conversation with Rainie by inquiring about her day. Once the tea was ready, Andy carried it to the living room, and the three of them sat down, Rainie lounging in the orange chair and Sharon and Andy stiffly sitting on separate couch cushions.
"So, Rainie, do you remember what Andy and I were talking about the other day?" Sharon asked, unsure how else to start.
"Yeah, about Andy moving to Silver Lake so he can be closer to you and his daughter," Rainie said.
"Right," Sharon replied. "We discussed it a little further, and we decided that we want to move in together." She took a deep breath and braced herself for an outburst.
But Rainie only smiled. "Yeah, I figured that's what you'll end up doing."
With Sharon stunned to silence, Andy took over. "It's important to us to find a house that you will also like living in."
"Oh, you, like, want me to move in with you, too?" Rainie arched her eyebrows.
"Yeah," Andy replied.
"So we're gonna be a weird little family?"
"We're not weird," Sharon and Andy said in unison.
Rainie rolled her eyes. "The two of you talking together is not weird at all."
"Maybe that's a little weird," Andy said as Sharon said a similar thing at the same time.
"Wow, you two can't even control that," Rainie mumbled to herself. "Are you sure you want me there?"
"Of course we do. You're my daughter" Sharon said. "And it's important to me that you feel comfortable in your own home."
"I mean, we practically live together already. Andy is here almost every night," Rainie said. "It's just moving to a different house, right?"
"Exactly," Andy said.
"So you're thinking about Silver Lake?" Rainie asked.
"That's one option, but we're open to suggestions. What kind of house do you want to live in?" Andy asked.
Rainie blinked. "No one had ever asked me that before. I'll have to think about that."
Andy sidled closer to Sharon. "Before we start looking, maybe we should have a family meeting and decide what each of us wants from this house. How does that sound?"
"Sounds great to me," Rainie said, and Sharon nodded.
Sharon could not believe it was that easy. It appeared that Rainie saw the next step coming before Sharon ever did, and prepared herself for it. Sharon was happy that her daughter was on board with the move. Having a sense of security was important to Rainie, and to her development into a functioning adult.
That idyll came to a screeching halt merely a week after their "weird family meeting" as Rainie called it. Sharon Beck requested to meet with Sharon. Feeling that she'd have better control of the situation at work, she invited Sharon Beck to stop by the Major Crimes division that day.
The first thing Sharon noticed when she saw Rainie's birth mother was that she looked much better than all the previous times she'd seen her. Sharon Beck looked healthy, was dressed neatly, and appeared sober.
"I'm sorry to interrupt you at work, I just – I didn't wanna discuss it on the phone." Sharon Beck started. "And it affects our daughter."
Sharon rounded her desk and offered Rainie's other mother a seat. She could tell the other woman was nervous, possibly even scared of her. Considering how abrasive most of their previous interactions have been, it made perfect sense for Sharon Beck to feel uncomfortable around her. In all honesty, Sharon also felt discomfort being in the same room with her.
"So, um, something happened when I was with Gary last winter," Sharon Beck said. "Something that I didn't know about until later."
"And you're worried that it will affect your deal?" Sharon asked, steeling her features.
"No," Sharon Beck smiled. "It's not that. I, um, I'm pregnant."
It took Sharon a moment to register what the other woman had said.
"I'm about four months along. It was a big surprise, and I didn't mention it sooner because the doctor said there was still a chance that I could miscarry, but now it looks like I'm doing really well, so…"
"Sharon, that's uh –" Sharon wasn't sure what she wanted to say. It took her a moment to find the words. "It's wonderful." Whatever this meant for Rainie, she wouldn't wish Sharon Beck ill.
Sharon Beck smiled, clearly relieved. "I'm so glad you feel that way," she said. "I just – I don't know what Rainie is gonna think, and I've gotten to the point where I'm afraid of her reactions to things, so I was wondering if, uh…"
"You would like me to tell her," Sharon replied with a smile she didn't feel. Sharon Beck's relationship with Rainie lacked a lot of trust, and even though the two of them loved each other, the abuse, addiction, and abandonment Rainie experienced damaged it beyond repair. Sharon Beck's insinuation that the damage was Rainie's fault made Sharon's blood boil.
"Would you?" Sharon Beck asked. "Gary won't be involved in the baby's life at all – or mine – and I'm just hoping that Rainie sees this as an opportunity to be a big sister, and I hope she'd be happy about it."
Sharon wasn't sure what Rainie would say, but considering her daughter's relationship issues, it was hard for Sharon to imagine an initial positive reaction to the news. Still, if she could help Rainie and her birthmother improve their relationship and hopefully help the unborn child gain an older sister who would be there for him or her, Sharon thought it was worth a try.
"She could be," she said. "Although I do think she'll have some questions."
"Yeah, she always has questions, let's just hope they're easier than usual."
After the conversation, Sharon contemplated the best way to tell Rainie. If the baby's father were a random guy, it would be more comfortable. But the fact that the father was the same man who sexually abused Rainie only made it harder.
Rainie staying over at Heather's gave Sharon more time to think about the best way to deliver the news to her daughter. She was having her morning coffee and waiting for some news from her team when Rainie walked into the condo.
"Why don't you sit down for a sec?" she asked after Rainie greeted her.
"Okay," Rainie said and took a seat at the table. "Uh, what's going on?"
"Well, your mother came to visit me yesterday." Right off the bat, Sharon could tell that Rainie sensed trouble.
"What has she been up to now?"
"She's not in trouble," Sharon said.
"What did she want, then?" Rainie asked.
"Your mother is pregnant, and I'm afraid the father of the child is Gary," Sharon replied.
"This is real?" Rainie asked. "She said this?"
Sharon nodded, noticing Rainie's shoulders tense.
"Oh, my God." Rainie's voice was hoarse and shaky.
"I fully understand how this could be upsetting for you," Sharon said. Rainie needed to know that whatever she felt was normal.
"Oh, Upsetting?" Rainie's voice went from being hoarse to being so high-pitched that it broke. "Mom, this is not just upsetting."
Sharon realized that Rainie needed to understand that she was on her side, not against her. "I don't even know what to think about it myself, really." She truly felt confused and conflicted about this situation. Rainie's pain was her pain. That's what being a mother often meant.
"How can she do it, Mom?" Rainie asked, her voice echoing the betrayal that she felt. "How can she have a child with the man who raped me?"
Sharon didn't have an answer.
The expression on Rainie's face suddenly changed, and Sharon could see the flare of madness veiling her daughter's eyes. "She can't have this baby. You have to tell her that she needs to get an abortion."
Sharon always supported women's right over their own bodies, whether it meant getting an abortion or continuing their pregnancy. Despite the complexity of the situation, she wanted Rainie to know that she would never support anyone policing another woman's body. "That's not your choice, Rainie," she said softly. "It's her body, and therefore she's the one who gets to decide what she does with it."
Rainie stood up and pushed her chair back so forcefully that it fell over. "I didn't get to decide what happened to my body. I had to lay there and let Gary do whatever he wanted to me night after night after night after night! If this child is born, it will never be over for me, Sharon."
Sharon felt her phone vibrating in her pocket, but despite knowing it was Lieutenant Provenza, Rainie needed her more. She let the call go unanswered, knowing that her team will be able to handle whatever situation they faced.
"Rainie, I know this is a lot to deal with, but if you truly want, you can move on from this, even in the current situation," Sharon said, knowing that she needed to be careful about the way she pitched her point of view to her daughter.
"How?"
"Whether you want to or not, you are going to be an older sister. The way it happened is unfair, but maybe a good idea to see this in a different way is to understand that what happened to you is not the baby's fault," Sharon suggested.
Rainie sighed, not wanting to concede the irrefutable truth.
"Your mother is more stable now than she's been in a long time, and I think your support of her choice to have this child can help ensure that your brother or sister has a better life than you did."
"This baby's is the child of a rapist and a drug addict. I hope it dies in the womb," Rainie said.
There was no point in forcing her opinion about it upon Rainie. The only thing that was left was to try and understand Rainie's needs in regards to this situation. "Honey, what can I do to help you right now?"
"Can you call Dr. Joe?"
Despite the desperation in her request, Rainie relieved some of Sharon's concern about what she might choose to do next. She was glad that Rainie was able to identify measures that she could take to handle triggering situations.
In less than an hour, they were sitting in Dr. Joe's waiting room. Normally, Rainie went there alone, but Rainie had admitted earlier that she was too distracted to drive.
As Rainie went into Dr. Joe's office, Sharon contacted Sharon Beck and let her know that Rainie might need some time to come to terms with everything that was happening and that it would be better for Rainie to get the space she needed to process the situation. She could tell that Rainie's other mother was disappointed to hear that Rainie did not react well to the news, and had to remind Sharon Beck that they had to respect Rainie's wishes in regards accepting the baby into her life. Until Rainie decided how she wanted to handle the relationship with her biological mother from this point on, Sharon would be there to support her. That was the only thing she could do.
-TBC-