Noire knows she is the best. It's what she's destined to be after all. She is a Candidate, a semi-divine being born to human parents, who will one day ascend to become a CPU and join the endless war to protect the human world from the Beyond.
Her father would often tell her about the night that she appeared in their bedroom, a Bundle of light and energy, and how he swore that his daughter would become the greatest CPU ever.
Noire knows she is the best, because her father has dedicated his life to preparing her for her ascension, so that when the time comes, she will carry out her Duty perfectly.
Like she does everything else.
Noire is destined to be perfect, and if you're perfect you don't need anyone else.
That is why, when Noire was 12 years old and she discovered her Soulmark, after a full day of being lazy, cocky and just overall unprofessional, she didn't know what to do. She knew of the phenomenon, of course. It was common knowledge after all, that about 37% of the human population would develop a bond with a soulmate sometime between their fifth and thirtieth Birthday. She knew that even Candidates had been known to develop those bonds on occasion.
But she had always assumed that it was something that only happened to others. So she decided that it didn't concern her and she was better off focussing on her studies and her Training. Since then she has hidden the mark from everyone else, and pretends it doesn't exist. But sometimes she wonders why she would need a soulmate. After all, she is going to be perfect.
After all, that's what dad tells me. That I'm going to be perfect. So I won't need anyone else, right?
Noire is 15 years old, and when she decides that maybe it wouldn't be so bad to have a soulmate. After all, they will be perfect, just like her. She doesn't need anyone by her side, but someone perfect like her would be acceptable.
It couldn't hurt just to know what they sound like. It's been so long since I heard it, and I can't really remember it. Just out of curiosity, of course. Not because I need anyone or anything.
So for the first time in three years she takes off her gloves and does not immediately cover her right wrist with another piece of clothing. for the first time in three years she touches the purple patch of skin in the form of a blade.
"HEY! What do you think you're doing?!"
She recoils in shock, drawing her left hand away from her right wrist as if she had touched something hot.
"WHAT?! What was that? That can't be right!"
Slowly, tentatively, she reaches for it again, because that can't be right. No one, not even her trainers, has ever spoken like that to her. And especially not her soulmate. They wouldn't be that rude.
"HEY! What do you think you're doing?!"
Again the high pitched voice rings through her head, righteous anger, laced with a cocky challenge. Again Noire's hand recoils in horror. This time there is no mistaking it. The first thing her soulmate will say to her is a challenge and an accusation? She doesn't understand.
Why would she challenge me? What would she accuse me of? Why does it hurt so much?!
She doesn't understand, doesn't want to admit, that she feels betrayed by someone she has never met. That she is crying for a friend she never knew she wanted.
Noire knows she is the best, and she knows she can move on from this, she can go back to not worrying about her soulmate. But now that she has heard her again, she remembers the melding, when, for a day, she felt what her soulmate felt, thought as she thought and acted like her soulmate would have. She remembers all the things she read and heard about soulmates and Soulmarks. How, no matter what you think about it, no matter how you meet or how apparently different you are, in the end, your soulmate will be the person most important to you in the world. How they will always end up perfectly complementing you and be just the person you need.
And sometimes her mind wanders, breaks the strong discipline she holds herself to, and she can't help but wonder: If this girl is really so imperfect as she seemed, so sloppy and unprofessional and lazy, then why did she feel so… happy?
No one sane, at least according to her father's standards, should voluntarily associate with someone as erratic, annoying and careless as Noire had acted during the melding. Someone like that didn't deserve any friends.
So why didn't she feel lonely?
Noire doesn't want to think: And why do I instead?
And sometimes, when she is alone in the night, and she wonders if she can really be good enough, if she can really make it alone, she just happens to touch the mark on her wrist.
Only because she wants to be absolutely sure of her competition, of course. Only because she is interested in the challenge her soulmate represents.
She isn't interested in the girl herself. Not even a little.
Noire is the best at everything, except maybe lying.