"Hey, you're quiet today."

I blinked myself back into focus. How could I zone out again and forget the hot girl spread across my lap?

"Sorry," I said. Sasha grinned a grin that sent warmth billowing in my chest.

"You apologize way too much," she killed the mood. I raised an eyebrow, waiting for her to point out anything else about me. Sasha caught my expression and ran her hands through my hair.

"You're also way too cute," she chirped.

"Nice save, babe," I replied with a smile. She gave a slight chuckle in response. My mind began to wander once more as I stroked her bare shoulders.

"So, what are you thinking about?"

I sucked my teeth, feeling weird about telling her like I was divulging an important secret. Was I? "Um... d-do you ever get that feeling that- that- I dunno, like, you're not supposed to exist?"

Sasha cocked her head, her eyebrows knitting together. "Uh, not following you, babe."

My lips scrunched up as I tried to think of a better way to explain it. "Like, um, like a long time ago, you got cloned and- and you're that clone." Sasha's smile drifted away, then returned.

"You're crazy!" she cried, slapping my chest. I felt a twinge of hurt deep inside but forced a laugh. She didn't understand what I meant. Does anyone? My hurt feelings left me when she grabbed my neck and got real close to my face.

"And you're also, like, really hot right now."

The closer she got, the faster my heart raced. Her hands trickled lower and her breath tickled my lips. I leaned forward. Kiss me, girl! She opened her mouth and then the freaking doorbell rang. At the best time. Sasha and I locked eyes.

"Don't answer that," she shook her head and hushed. Her grip on my body tightened. I would have- should have- certainly ignored that doorbell for her, but...

"I can't not get that, Sasha. Sorry."

Last time I ignored the door, it was Father. And he was pissed and soaking wet.

Very hesitantly, I slid Sasha off me. She folded her arms on the couch with an annoyed expression crossing her face. I gritted my teeth and released a long breath to cool down my warmed ears. It's fine. I'll be back. She'll be right there waiting for me. Now where did I leave my shirt? I found it under the coffee table, threw it on, and answered the door.

"Mike Afton! Hii!"

I bit back a word. Now really isn't the best time!

"Uh, hey-hey, Holly! So great to see you!" I lied. Kinda. Holly, looking like a whole snack with a skin-tight dress and heels on, leaned against the tiny balcony's railing batting her eyelashes. Listen, she was just a backup, okay? The dating world hadn't been kind to me. I rubbed the back of my neck, my heart now racing for a different reason.

"H-how exactly did you know where I live?" I asked. Holly smiled, this smile beautiful yet chilling like a sweet poison.

"I asked all your neighbours about you," she squealed with put her arms behind her back and extended her chest as if I didn't already have a good view of it. "So, um, I was wondering if you were free later tonight." She ran her fingers down my chest. I forced myself to take a step back. My blood ran hot in my veins, dizzying me.

"Um, n-not today, Holly," I lowered my voice, glancing over my shoulder. "I, uh, I'm super busy, uh, applying for jobs and stuff." That's not entirely a lie. Holly's lip jutted out and her arms crossed like a defiant tot.

"Yeah, you keep saying that."

I waved my hands to silence her just as I heard Sasha call from the living room, "Who's that at the door?"

"Just, ah, just a business lady with some business offers," I got out quickly, then turned back to see Holly's eyes darken. Oh, I messed up again, didn't I?

"Who's that?!" Holly exclaimed. Raising my hands, I backed away and unintentionally let Holly storm inside.

"Holly, please, I- you need to go," I said, already hearing the panic stir in my voice. I can't lose another one! I didn't have time to react when Holly swung her hand into my face, striking it with a force I never knew she had in her. Something flashed before my eyes- purple. I clutched my stinging cheek, the world spinning.

"Ow! What was that for?"

Holly whirled around, the moue back on her face. "Your neighbours said you were such a sweet boy!"

Then she walked away, her blond hair swaying behind her. I didn't bother chasing her down. The one I did, however, I didn't know was standing right behind me.

"Wow, I wonder what that business lady was going to offer you," deadpanned Sasha. "A blowjob, maybe?" I flinched and pivoted to find her with an expression I always hoped I'd never see on her face before. I gulped. No, no, no!

"Sasha, I can exp-," I started, but Sasha snapped at me, glaring into my soul, "Don't you even, you double-crosser." She stabbed my chest with her long fingernail.

"I- I don't even know her like that!" I tried. Sasha gritted her teeth.

"Were you seeing her?" Her voice wavered slightly.

"No! I haven't been!" I protested. Sasha shook her head.

"Liar."

She stepped around me to get to the door.

"Sasha." I grabbed her wrist to stop her from leaving me.

"Ow!" she howled. "You're hurting me!" At that moment, I ignored her cries.

"Don't go."

Sasha's brow softened.

"Please, don't leave me alone. I-" I swallowed tears of my own. "I don't want to be alone." Sasha scowled and yanked her arm free of my grasp.

"Oh, man up, will you? You're such a baby."

The words crawled into my head, burning my brain and sending flashes of colours before my eyes. No... My head spinning, I stumbled back and fell against the wall, squinting through the colours to watch Sasha walk away. I didn't try to stop her again.

01101110 01101001 01100111 01101000 01110100 00100000 01111010 01100101 01110010 01101111

The rest of the evening for me was a blur of salty hot tears. I sobbed my heart out into the couch pillow, only stopping after my aching body screamed. I rubbed the snot off my face with the bottom of my shirt.

"You can't cry yourself to sleep again, Michael," I told myself. "You're a grown adult now." I took my time getting off the couch and grabbed a VHS tape off the shelf. This'll cheer me up. I watched two hours of cheesy romance, hoping it'll heal at least 25% of my broken heart. But the couples resolving their issues with nothing but a kiss only made things worse. That stuff never happens in real life. I switched off the telly and slumped back onto the couch. The tears threatened to come back.

"I'm nineteen and can't stay in a relationship," I spoke the sad, sad truth, burying my face in my hands. "I lasted two weeks with Sasha. That was the longest. And now she's..." My words trailed off as I began to sob again.

Sometime later, I heard keys unlocking the front door and bolted upright. Father? He hasn't been home in ages. I rubbed my eyes, not that he would care if he caught me crying; after all, he's done it millions of times. I heard footsteps down the hall- approaching the living room.

"Oh," was all Father said when he entered. I guess he wasn't expecting me to be there. When I began to feel anxiety rising within me, my fingers took a strip of gum out of my back pocket and slipped it into my mouth. Father's not going to do anything. After a couple of chews, I watched him go into the kitchen, open the fridge, and take out a beer. He popped off the cap and chugged half of it before taking a breath. I plopped back onto the couch, set on mourning again.

"Hello."

I sat up with a frown. He only speaks to me when he needs something. What is it now, Father? Need me to wash your underpants again?

"Hello, Father," I replied, trying to mask the annoyance in my voice. Father had sat down in the armchair across from me, clutching the beer bottle close to him. Only now did I notice his glimmering forehead. What the hell has Father gotten himself into today? Father looked rather awkward sitting there, rubbing his unshaven face while staring with a distant, thoughtful look on his face.

"Did you lose another one, boy?"

I wanted to glare or spit or do something at him but I just nodded, knowing he was right and that it'd be stupid to be angry at him; he didn't do anything wrong. Father chuckled lightly.

"I was like you when I was your age."

My heart skipped a beat. "Really?"

"No," he said.

"Oh."

Father kept staring at the wall. I wondered if he'd suddenly lost his vision somehow.

"I settled with one girl. Took one look and said, 'that's the one'," he talked moreso to himself than me. I really wanted this conversation to end.

"Okay, Father."

He continued talking. "Some advice for you, my boy: when you do find the one, remember protection." He burst into laughter at his weird joke. I could only force a smirk.

"Okay, Father. Thanks for the advice, Father."

At least he gave me some kind of advice; he never did that. Maybe he isn't sober right now. Father's amused expression slowly shifted into a dejected one.

"Michael." Him using my actual name caught my attention.

"Yes, Father?"

"I-" he started then failed. He tried again, louder. "I need you to do something. It's- it's important."

Important, my mind repeated and refused to believe. I nodded and waited for his response. Laundry time...

"I want you to find your sister," the words spewed fast out of his mouth as if he'd struggled to get them out prior, so fast that I didn't hear him the first time.

"What was that?"

"I need you to find your sister," he enunciated. I frowned.

I don't have a sister, my brain told me, but a small part of it knew otherwise. Sister... his words lingered. I have a sister...? I got off the couch.

"I have a sister?"

Father nodded. My amazement soon fizzled out and was replaced by anger. "Why have you never told me that?" I tried to remember my childhood, hoping I'd remember having a sister, but, as usual, I got white static. I rubbed my aching forehead.

"Okay, I have a sister. And you want me to... find her?" More questions filled my head. Is she older or younger than me? Does she have an accent, like me? What does she look like?

"She was... lost to us a long time ago," Father hesitated. My face fell. So she's dead then. I wanted to meet her.

"What happened?" I asked, only for Father to run over the question, quickly explaining, "Often children forget the most tragic of accidents, pushing it to the far recesses of the brain to be forgotten forever. That's why you don't remember her. But don't worry, you will get to meet her."

Okay. That explains my memory problem but you didn't answer my other- wait, meet her? But you told me-

"You said she was dead, Father," I pointed out, rather rudely. "How can I possibly meet her?" Father didn't reply, only tapped his bristly chin while he thought.

"Father?" I snapped in his face to get his attention. He blinked, then looked up at me, his silver eyes glossy, and asked a ridiculous question: "Do you believe in ghosts, Michael?"

"Of course not," I replied. "That's stupid." Dumb. Father frowned, then stood from the chair.

"Oh well. I suppose you'll find out soon enough."

He walked off to his room.

What the actual flip-flop is that supposed to mean? I pondered as I got up and went to my room as well. I decided it was time to get some sleep. I changed into PJs and sprawled across my bed. As I closed my eyes, I began to think about Sasha again. She only ever stepped foot in this room twice. I sighed. They always just leave. I slammed my pillow over my head as if that would knock the now-painful memories out of my brain. I don't know when I finally fell asleep.

"Elizabeth! No!"

The monstrous claw shot out. The girl's fiery red hair flew all about as she was yanked inside the belly of the beast. I fell to my knees, tears streaming down my face. The monster, fifty metres tall, snapped its head in my direction with an unblinking stare. Its eyes shifted from baby blue to a glowing green. I couldn't move my legs; my body was frozen stiff. I could only watch the transformation- the clown's teeth elongated into a deadly smile and claws grew on its hands. It transformed into a nightmarish bear that lunged right for my head.

A scream flew out of my mouth.

"What the hell was that?" I asked nobody, jumping upright and struggling to catch a breath. My eyes darted around the room. I didn't feel safe here. The closet door hung ajar and for a second, I imagined the ugly bear jumping out of it. I hugged myself to stop my body from trembling. If only someone was around to comfort me.

There was a girl. I knew her, I realised. I did have a sister. I tangled my fingers in my sweaty hair. Why can't I remember her? I threw my blanket off and rushed out of my room, heading straight for Father's. I didn't care if he was already asleep.

I'm going to find her, Father. I promise. But before I do, I'm going to need some answers.

Little did I know that would be the stupidest thing I would ever do.