Road to Tears
Chapter 17
It wasn't their normal parting when he left the next morning, it was strained as she told him to be careful, looking into his eyes as if she was trying to read his mind again forcing him to look away. If he only knew and looked properly this look he was finding so disconcerting was one of worry for the man she adored who knew he was struggling dealing with the loss of his friend and trying to cope with some of the things he had seen. He'd seen it before on the bridge when she was trying to save him, but he wasn't looking.
He didn't tell her he loved her when he left, just said goodbye and I'll see you when I get back. He was detached from showing any emotion, it was such a shock to Molly, his face blank and emotionless. His eyes had always given him away to her but now they showed nothing, that was if he looked at her long enough for her to see them. He had never held back in telling her how much he loved her since the first time he told her, so his increasing distance and detachment to her brought back all her insecurities that he was fed up with her that she didn't fit in with his life anymore and was holding him back. He hadn't even noticed the extra stripe on her uniform as he was leaving, her promotion to Corporal now confirmed and visible. Molly shrugged as the door closed as he left for Brize and his flight, she shouldn't really be surprised this was always going to happen at some point, deep down she should have known that he would come to his senses and realise she wasn't the love of his life, just the slapper from the East End that scratched an itch for a bit, his bit of rough after his divorce. Someone like him would never stay with someone like her.
-OG-
Charles was shocked that they had been in Belize no more than a few hours when the Brigadier called him into the office, a file open on his desk. He expected a bit of a rollicking about Nigeria but it wasn't, it was about the complete disregard of army discipline and protocol for allowing the medic and Captain of Special Forces to have relations on tour. Why did he do nothing about it and either remove the medic or ask for a new SF team to be deployed to Afghan, especially as he knew there was history there. What made it worse was that he then called Lane in to hear the charges against his competency and she was reprimanded for her conduct. If looks could kill he would be pushing up daisies as Molly would say. He was certainly a screw up.
They had been there a few weeks on various exercises within the confines of the barracks culminating into a meeting in the ops room and the Belizean Captain explained the purpose of the days exercise, a medic led exercise. They would divide into two teams, the purpose being to find an injured soldier and stretcher before finding their way back to base. A timed exercise first team home.
Corporal Lane as medic would led one team with Sergeant King and Captain James the other. He couldn't lose this, he was the Captain for goodness sake. They found the dummy and the stretcher, when he checked his GPS and figured they didn't need to stay on the tracks and could cut through the jungle, it would save them time. After all that's what Molly and Jackie had done. Biggest mistake of his life as they raced through the undergrowth.
He had never felt pain like it as he screamed out in agony as the two stakes of the boar trap shot through his thigh. Richards and Kahlil holding him up as Brains tried to cut through the stakes removing his leg from the trap. It didn't take long for Lane and the rest of the team to find them with the noise he knew he was making and couldn't help. The pain was unbearable and he hoped he never felt the like again and he had been shot, but Molly had been there and given him Morphine pretty sharpish.
The pain was so bad he couldn't focus on what was happening around him, panting for breath and making him feel dizzy. Lane had given him Morphine and said that the stakes had to remain there, they didn't know if an artery had been nicked as he passed out. The next he knew it was just him and Lane in the jungle. She told him there was no signal on the radio's they couldn't get hold of anyone to let them know so she had advised that they go back to base and get help.
"But what happens if we need help Lane, why did you send them all back?" he panted through the pain.
"I'm here Boss, I'll help you" and he nodded loosing conscious again. He had no idea how long he had been asleep for, he felt a small hand over his chest, he held it and the body of someone curled up behind him "Molly?" he whimpered "No, only me, you're awake then?" said Georgie sitting up and smiling at him "Do you need more Morphine?"
"Probably, but are we safe here? I think we should move".
"No, we can stay here for a bit longer, shouldn't be too long before 2 section get back" she jabbed him in the leg with another dose of Morphine and he relaxed back down onto the jungle floor. He thought he saw the bushes moving and wanted to draw his pistol not sure what it was. Staring around him for movement he thought he saw Elvis and smiled before sleeping again.
When he next woke there was a young boy talking with Lane. She looked across at him once she realised he was awake "Seems this is drug country Boss, we have to move" He could only nod through the fog of his mind. Even with the Morphine he had never felt pain like this as the boy and Lane tried to move him to the village. Hopefully it would be safe here he thought, till help came. When he next opened his eyes, she was treating a woman with some sort of sore on her foot.
"Should you be getting involved Lane?" he sighed "We won't be coming back for a follow up."
"I'm a medic, we always get involved" she responded harshly "Is this to do with your report about Afghan, me and Elvis?" still smarting at being called in and getting a lecture from the Brigadier, she had done that tour with them in Nigeria and it wasn't mentioned then so why now after all this time.
"What you did, what he did shouldn't have happened on tour" looking at her with sympathy.
"Like you and Molly on tour then?" she retorted bitterly
He closed his eyes, even after all this time there were still whispers about them on that tour, he had heard them, he knew Molly had even though she never mentioned it. The innuendos and he knew that Molly was hurt by them. "She knows" he whispered.
"Knows what?" she responded harshly.
"That I'm not coping, that I'm not functioning at home" he sighed then snorted a laugh "Said I was hiding behind my uniform."
Georgie moved up towards his head and stroked his cheek as he closed his eyes, he was running a fever she could feel it. He opened his eyes again and looked into hers "I'm sorry, sorry I didn't listen to Richards, sorry about Elvis."
"You and me both" stroking his hair away from his forehead "I miss him" as her eyes filled with tears.
"We're bound together Georgie, by Elvis" he said quietly as his eyes closed again with the pain he was feeling in his leg and he fell into a fitful sleep. Everything felt surreal, he was back by a lake and recognised it, Molly was in her wedding dress laughing as Elvis took her hand, laughing too as he led her into the lake. She didn't like deep water where she couldn't see the bottom. She turned back to look at him and he could see the frightened expression on her face but Elvis whispered something in her ear as she looked back at Elvis and continued walking with him. Elvis looked back at him but it wasn't the Elvis from a moment ago, the one at his wedding, it was the broken burnt Elvis, the one he saw in Afghan and he was taking Molly away.
"Molly" he called "Molly"
"It's me Boss" said Georgie again stroking his forehead, noting the fever getting stronger.
He pushed her away, "Molly's gone" he was struggling to come back from what he had seen in his dreams, Elvis taking Molly to a place that would frighten her.
There was gunfire in the distance and the young lad that had been helping them came back into the room telling them they had to move and they would go down river to hide.
Charles didn't know how he had got here he couldn't focus with the pain he was feeling, but they were hiding in a cave, even he could smell his leg now and he was sure he would lose it at the very least, if they didn't get rescued soon.
"I think I've crossed the line Georgie, it's what Elvis would have wanted, for me to be there when he can't be" he sighed "I want to be there for you"
"But you still have Molly"
"She's gone she doesn't need me anymore" he whispered. He could feel himself starting to slip away, he didn't know what was real or imaginary he still kept seeing Elvis take Molly away, as everything went black again. Elvis was there again in his dreams but he didn't look happy
"Do you want to lose the best thing that ever happened to you?"
"I'll look after her for you."
Elvis laughed "Look after who Charlie" and he started to fade away again.
"Boss I need you" he felt a hand on his cheek "Come on, wake up and move, we have to get to the airfield."
Somehow they made it to the airfield, the pain still so bad and he knew he had a fever, his leg infected, he couldn't work out where he was or what was real as he saw people around him, he felt so cold. He saw Georgie and held her hand "I meant what I said, we are bound together, we know what we've both lost" she gave a half smile and nodded. There were others there that lifted him to the helicopter, Spanner but he looked blank almost as if he didn't know him.
"So, you've got the next medic lined up already?" he heard a faint whisper and opened his eyes into the ice cold eyes of Bones. What was he doing here?.
-OG-
Charles felt terrible, his head was throbbing, his mouth felt dry and he had no concept of time or how long he had been here or even which country he was in. He thought he saw Elvis a few times while he was in this fog of conscious and dream world, his dreams so vivid he wasn't sure if they had really happened. He kept smiling at him and telling him not to lose her, but every time he tried to run after him ask him what he was talking about he vanished again.
He looked down at himself and saw a tent over his legs. He put his hand under the covers and felt down and breathed a sigh of relief that his leg was still there. As he looked around he saw the white walls and ceiling and knew he was in hospital, he felt something gripping his hand looking down to see a mane of dark hair on the side of the bed. His hand being gripped and the head resting on her arm the hair falling covering her face. He knew who it was though as he tried to extract his hand from the grip of the sleeping woman.
His movements causing the woman to stir and lift her head as she smiled at him.
"I've been so worried about your Charles" beamed Molly as she stood up her hand still in his as her free hand stroked his forehead pushing his hair back running her fingers through his curls. He looked at her and could see dark circles under her eyes and they were swollen and red, she had obviously been crying.
"Where am I?"
"QE2 Birmingham" she sighed still stroking his hair "Worst 2 weeks of me life waiting for you to get back."
"2 weeks?" and she nodded "you were too sick to travel, but you're back now" she smiled. She still hadn't told him how long he had been back but unconscious.
"Where is Georgie, where is 2 section?" he stammered.
"All safely tucked up in Aldershot" her smile leaving her face "They got back before you"
"My leg…?"
"Don't worry about it Charles, bit of a mess but they saved it" she sighed "loads of rehab again though mate" leaning forward to kiss him and at the last minute he turned away. The hurt clear in her eyes "Sorry something has died in my mouth, didn't want you to smell it."
"Do you think I would be worried about something like that" her eyes glassy and as he looked at her he could feel the hurt radiating off her. He watched as she drew in a deep breath looking deep into his eyes and again he got that feeling she could read his mind that she knew "We've been so worried about you Charles, you've been away with the fairies for weeks."
"I'm tired Molly" she nodded and sat back down again "I'll let them all know and when you get moved to Headley they can come and visit". He closed his eyes he didn't want to discuss this, he knew what would come next. She said weeks, what did she mean, it was 2 weeks before he got to Birmingham but how long had he been here.
-OG-
What with the two weeks he spent in Belize while they stabilised him for transport back to the UK then another month in hospital he finally moved to Headley for his rehab. If Molly thought about it this wound looked worse than when he had been shot in the leg and it was the same leg so he was really going to have to work to get full use of it back.
She tried to tell him that while he was here it might be a good idea to mention the nightmares he had been having since his tour to Nepal and Afghan where Elvis had been killed. He told her he didn't have them that often and it was under control. She raised her eyebrows at him but didn't say anything, she had heard him calling out in his sleep while he had been here.
He felt better since he was moved to Headley and getting the treatment he needed for his leg. He still felt a lot of pain and was on quality meds as Molly said. He liked it here this time around, it was peaceful, he didn't have any disturbances could sit there thinking, the mistakes he had made, things he wished he had noticed, would it have made a difference, could he have changed the outcome. He spent most of his days in quiet contemplation if he wasn't having physio or having hospital visits, he didn't have to talk with anyone and everyone left him alone. Everything was organised for him, his meals, his treatment, he didn't have to think. They had already told him he would be there a few months and that suited him down to the ground, he didn't have to face Molly and that look, the one that made him think he was a screw up and failure. How had everything just spiralled like this? He wished he could stay here forever so he didn't have to think about returning to the real world, the one where he had to make decisions, where Molly wanted to talk to him. The world where he knew he was a disappointment.
All of 2 section came in to visit him and he couldn't stop looking at Georgie. How had he not noticed before Belize she was struggling with losing Elvis the same as him that she needed him to help her through this, he could tell from her looks and her stance that she needed him to help her deal with her loss. After all it was his fault she didn't have Elvis anymore. She had saved his life out there and the least he could do was to look after her for Elvis, make sure she stayed safe.
Charles saw that expression on Molly's face again, the one that looked into his soul and found him wanting. That she didn't need him anymore, the disappointment in him written all over her face. He saw her eyes fill with tears again and she left the room while 2 section entertained him with their antics in Aldershot.
It was a couple of days later that Rebecca came in to visit him with Sam. He was pleased to see him although his son didn't seem as happy to see him as he expected.
"Rebecca" he said cordially "It's good of you to bring Sam."
"Did you think I wouldn't" she smiled tightly leaning forward as if kissing his cheek "even if you forget his is" his eyes opening wide at her comment "Well that's part of the reason I'm here" she sighed "I've been seeing someone for a while now and it's time he met Sam and I thought you should know."
Rebecca looked at the crestfallen expression on his face "Did you think I would spend my life alone and celibate?"
"Of course, not."
"The army has always been more important to you than anything Charles" she sighed "I'll leave you with Sam to spend some time with him."
"Where's Molly?"
"Getting some rest, I expect" raising her eyebrows "another relationship you are prepared to sacrifice for your beloved army."
"So, she didn't come today then" he whispered
"No Charles" replied Rebecca narrowing her eyes at the tone he was using "I told her to rest, we were coming here today, she has been sat by your bed for weeks when you first came back, she's shattered" sighing "Spend some time with Sam Charles, while he still wants to or while he still remembers who you are."
"I'm his father."
"You remember that then do you?"
"What are you insinuating, what's Molly been saying?"
"Molly hasn't been saying anything, but I was married to you to and I remember how you were after that Private was killed."
"His name was Geraint Smith."
Rebecca shrugged "You still shut off for a time though didn't you? Now you are doing it again."
"You've got no idea what it's like".
"Molly is in the army, are you saying she doesn't either and doesn't understand what it's like to lose a friend?"
"I really don't want to talk about it with you Rebecca" he said sullenly.
"Don't suppose you do which is fine by me, let's hope your refusal to talk to anyone about it doesn't cause irreparable damage to your marriage. I'll come back in an hour to collect Sam" and left the room.
-OG-
2 section arrived to see him again, he was still in pain as he walked to meet them in the gardens on his crutches. He was a long way from being even anywhere near recovery, his leg still strapped in gadgetry keeping his leg straight. He sat on one of the benches in the garden, his leg stretched out as Georgie came and sat next to him.
"It's good to see you Boss" she grinned and patted him lightly on his bad leg "Pleased that I was good enough to get you back and keep your leg."
"Yeah me too, I have a lot to thank you for Georgie" he smiled back at her.
Molly had just arrived at Headley and was told he was in the gardens with 2 section, from where she was she saw the interaction between Charles and Georgie. The look that passed between them. She took a deep breath and breezed over to the group with a smile on her face, one that she didn't feel. She looked at her friend and smiled and her stomach rolled as she lowered her eyes getting up to talk with Fingers.
Eventually they all left and it was just her and Charles sat on the bench in the gardens "What have you been saying to Rebecca?" he demanded, the way he lent forward into her face and poked his finger at her she leant back for the first time a little frightened of him and his anger.
"Nothing Charles" her face showing a worried frown at the accusation "I wouldn't say nothing would I, there's nothing to say is there?"
"Where have you been?"
"Rebecca said she was bringing Sam and then Brains got in touch to say they were coming over, so got a few bits done at home" she answered honestly but she could feel her heart rate going up with the anger she felt at being questioned like this when he still clearly had no intention of talking with her, letting her in and after what she just witnessed between him and Georgie, she had loads more to worry about than he did. Something had happened out there.
He turned away leaning back against the bench, his head back and closing his eyes against the afternoon sun. Not only did he not make her happy anymore, he was frightening her as well, he saw that look of fear as he put out his hand. This wasn't him, it wasn't his life anymore, he felt like things were just happening around him and he couldn't stop it. How had it all gone so wrong, he felt disgusted with himself that he had frightened her with his tone and actions, he just felt so angry sometimes.
"Do you want me to help you back to your room" she asked quietly and he nodded unable to speak. When she had him settled in his chair she thought she would try and broach the subject again although after the confrontation in the gardens was a little unsure of the wisdom of it "While you are here, do you think it might be worth having a word about your dreams and that?"
"What makes you think I'm still having them?"
"Well somethings wrong Charles" she shrugged "If I was your medic I would be asking questions, not just about your dreams but some of your mood swings."
"What?" he almost bellowed at her "Well fortunately for me, you are not my medic so it doesn't matter. My medic hasn't highlighted any issues, thank you."
"Charles" she persevered "Do think that you might have PTSD?"
"No do you?"
"Well," she was losing confidence about continuing he looked so angry again "I think it's a possibility, the moods, the dreams…" she tailed off.
"You've got no idea what it's like" he sighed at her "Being a Captain and responsible…"
"Well, if it ain't PTSD then it's me" her eyes filling with tears "You ain't talking to me anymore and you are shutting me out physically and emotionally,"
He huffed a breath "Well you are hardly forthcoming, are you?" he glared "I had to find out about Sierra Leone from Captain McClyde."
Their argument coming to an end when the physio came into the room to say Charles had a session. He got up and left, not even saying goodbye or acknowledging her presence. She sat on his bed tears streaming down her face as she spotted his phone. The memory of him and Georgie sat on the bench together burning holes in her eyes. Message after message telling Georgie he meant what he said in the jungle. They were bound together by Elvis. Please come and visit him. She almost felt her heart shatter, the pain she felt was physical.
As she sat there staring at the phone with all the evidence she needed that he didn't love her anymore, she thought back to her 18th Birthday, her Dad telling her she was a common tart. Artan in a taxi kissing a girl, then in the bogs with her best mate Mary. She sighed, to be expected really she would never be able to hold on to someone like Charles, he would always want someone more like him. She needed to protect herself, she couldn't let him see how much he had hurt her and she couldn't look on while he was lining up her replacement.
When Charles got back to his room after his physio Molly had gone. He felt a peculiar fluttery sensation in his chest that she had gone. He laid down on his bed his hands behind his head staring at the ceiling. Why couldn't Molly just understand why he had to do these operations, he had to make sure they stayed safe and it was his fault that Elvis wasn't here to look after Georgie and so that responsibility had to pass to him as his best mate. He closed his eyes and fell into a fitful sleep where he kept seeing his friend telling him not to lose her, she needs him. He must mean Georgie because he's not here to do it. He couldn't let his friend down.
-OG-
Molly went out that evening with Jackie to the pub and onto a nightclub, they had got absolutely hammered. Also in there were Spanner, Peanut, Jackson and their new boss Bones. She had a vague recollection of meeting him before but in her drunken state couldn't place the face. But once he had said his name she remembered Charles going on about him knowing more than he did about her and the trouble he had caused.
Even though she was plastered she acknowledged his comments that he thought Charles might have PTSD and he was suspicious even from Nigeria. It sort of made her feel a bit better in some ways that she wasn't the only one that was worried about his mental state, someone else had noticed too. Although she couldn't understand how Georgie had missed it, as a medic. Even on her first tour and straight out of training she was concerned about Smurf, noticed that something was wrong. She was beginning to feel that Charles was right and it was all in her head that was until Bones confirmed he also thought he may be having problems, based on what he had seen in both Nigeria and Belize.
She wasn't ready to give up on Charles, she loved him and knew there would never be anyone like him for her again. She went back to Headley to try again, see if she could convince him that he needed help and if she couldn't be the one he wanted to talk with then maybe he should see one of the psychologists while he was here.
"Why don't you look at coming off active service for a bit" she suggested with a small smile "what about moving into training for a bit, get the next batch of soldiers ready?"
He raised an eyebrow looking at her as if she had lost the plot "Really, work with Sergeant Geddings"
"Pirbright is pretty bloody big mate, chances of you working with him with your rank is pretty bleedin slim" she huffed "Not that I can see what your problem is."
"That's just it, you can't see what you are suggesting" he sighed looking down at his hands "I'm a Captain and I need to be with my sections" looking back up at her he continued "Georgie has lost Elvis and that was my fault, it's down to me to make sure she is safe. As her friend I would have thought you would understand and support that as Elvis isn't here to do it, then I must."
"Are you sure she needs looking after Charles" giving him a hard stare forcing him to look away "Is this just unnecessary guilt on your part" taking the bull by the horns she continued "Did you assign anyone to look after those kids, you know the ones what got taken by traffickers?"
"Of course, I did."
"Who was it then?"
"Molly don't pretend to understand orders when you have never followed one."
Molly smirked "Don't bother answering I think I've already worked it out" running her hands over her face with frustration that he was just looking at this from one angle and not the bigger picture determined that he was to blame for everything, not seeing he was being eaten up with guilt for Elvis, survivors guilt, that he had PTSD. He needed to rest, have some counselling before everything just slipped away from him. She knew from Rebecca that he hadn't returned Sam's phone call and his Mum had said he told them not to visit him, he was too busy with physio and he was tired.
"Look Molly if you can't deal with this, it might be better if you stopped coming over all the time, I need to concentrate on getting better, the physio takes it out of me" taking in a big breath before finishing "I'll be home soon enough but leave me to know what's best for me and its concentrating on getting my leg better and not with your insecurities."
"My insecurities?"
"Yes" he looked at her "You're the one questioning everything, making a mountain out of a molehill. There is nothing wrong with me other than needing to get this leg fixed and the constant earache from your mithering."
"So, you don't want me to come here anymore" her eyes filling with tears "that's what you're saying ain't it?"
"Yes."
"Thanks Charles, thanks for making me feel like something you scrapped off your shoe". She picked up her belongings and left without looking back at him, desperate not to cry until she was out of there.
Molly went home she didn't fancy anything to eat but opened a bottle of wine which probably wasn't a sensible move with how she was feeling. She put the TV on, spent the evening drinking her wine and sobbing at where had it all gone so wrong. Her friend who she expected to see what she had, that Charles was struggling to cope, but hadn't and now he had feelings for her, well she surmised that from the texts she had read. What she didn't know was if those feelings were reciprocated, but she had a nasty feeling they were from the way she saw her looking at him when 2 section visited.
She went to pour herself another glass and realised she had drunk the whole bottle, as she got up and started staggering up the stairs for bed. She needed to get a grip, try again. Go and see him even though he had told her not to, try again to make him realise that he needed help. When Smurf died and she felt that overwhelming guilt that she had missed things, thinking he just needed glasses Charles had supported her, told her she couldn't have known, so had Georgie. She had to see him again and keep trying, let him know she cared and wanted to help him. She was mistaken she must be, Georgie must know, they hadn't spoken recently, well not since they had come back from Belize, she would ring her and ask. Something had happened out there and not just Charles leg injury because whatever it was had got worse than it was before. She could see how tired he was, he wasn't shaving, it was like he was giving up. She was convinced he was still having flashbacks and nightmares.
She finished her shift and got the bus across to Headley, she had a chat with the nurse on his ward and knew that he was in the gym. He was determined to get back to full fitness as fast as possible, at the expense of everything else – visits from her, Sam or his parents.
As she waved to the nurse she started her way to the gym and saw Georgie walking ahead of her in the same direction. Her first instinct was to call out to her, but she stopped and just followed, Georgie completely unaware that she was there. Why was she here, why hadn't she spoken with Molly and said she was coming just to make sure that it was ok to visit? Previous 2 section visits had all been done through her to make sure he wasn't having too many visitors at once.
She stood outside the gym, the door slightly ajar so she could hear what was going on. She looked at Charles on the bicycle, his earphones in and cycling hard, everything she remembered from when he had been shot, trying to get his fitness back, that bloody holiday in Arran and watching him going off with Elvis cycling round the island so he could pass his fitness tests. She saw as he looked up and smiled at Georgie, and her eyes filled with tears as she remembered he used to look at her like that. She listened as he told her there were problems in the marriage. While she was pissed on that bottle of wine she had sent a couple of texts saying that she understood and that perhaps they had been a bit hasty getting married. She realised that he needed someone more than her, perhaps they should start thinking about ending it, maybe they aren't meant to spend the rest of their lives together.
He showed her the bloody messages, all this time she had been covering up thinking he had PTSD. Molly listened as he said she didn't have Elvis anymore and if things had been different could she love him. They had moved and she didn't hear the next bits just Georgie asking "What about Molly? You still have her."
"She doesn't need me anymore" he retorted although he felt his stomach roll as he said it "We're bonded by Elvis, he would want this for us."
"I don't know Charlie" responded Georgie "How can you be sure?"
"Look at the texts Georgie, she's moving on."
Molly moved back to the shadows of the corridor, it just goes to show how far they had drifted apart, he couldn't see. She couldn't watch the pair of them getting together, she felt physically sick that her friend and her husband, two people she had trusted looked like they wanted to embark on a relationship and neither had the nerve to tell her. So, she left without letting him know she had visited feeling tears streaming down her face at what was looking like the end of her marriage.
First of all, she met up with Bones in a coffee shop, she couldn't believe what he had come up with as a way of moving on, she still couldn't stop laughing at the ridiculousness of it. Then she arranged to meet Jackie, but only a quiet drink this time.
"I tried to organise one of our get togethers as Georgie is down here at the moment but she said she couldn't make it."
Molly shrugged "Well she hasn't phoned me at all and when I've seen her with 2 section she won't look me in the eye." She sighed "I think she might be avoiding me"
"Don't mean anything, she might just be embarrassed about what he's been saying to her, doesn't know how you will react."
"Well, that's just it Jacs, I don't think anything has happened, not physically anyway but why hasn't she mentioned it? This could all be part of the PTSD, she must have noticed."
"You're not really going to take Bones up on his offer are you?" Jackie laughed "train up to be Special Forces?"
"Regardless of whether there is something going on between him and Georgie, I can't stay in Aldershot if he's moving on" taking a sip of her drink and looking downcast "Might be best to be prepared for when he tells me to go."
"Oh Molly" she sighed for her friends sadness "Do you want me to report it, that he has PTSD?"
Molly shook her head "No mate, but thanks for offering" looking at her friend with watery eyes "If this is the end of my marriage, then you reporting something like this might just look like spite, you know sticking up for your mate."
"Keep trying though Moll won't you?" said Jackie patting her on the knee
Molly grinned "I ain't about to give up yet mate" taking in a deep breath "Love him don't I and I have to have hope."
"Yeah you do, after all you are a West Ham supporter" and both girls clinked their glasses giggling at a line she had frequently used when she was troubled, although neither found it remotely funny.
.
A/N We are nearly there now and tomorrow this will finish as I upload the final chapter. I know it is a bit vague about her meeting with Bones but the night out with Jackie is described in more detail in Road to Redemption as there is a slight crossover.