Road to Tears
Chapter 18
Charles had become expert in hiding what he was thinking and those in Headley still didn't realise he was struggling to function, not just as a soldier but with everyday life, as a father and husband. His face devoid of all emotion. Every time he saw Molly he felt she was invading his head space, reading his mind, knew what a screw up he actually was. He didn't like it one little bit that she knew, that no one else did, that she made him feel like this. He couldn't help but feel angry with her that she wouldn't leave him alone, it reminded him what a disappointment and failure he had turned out to be.
Here she was again asking him to consider a non-active role, speak to someone about what was troubling him. Reminded him how patient he was and why not look at a training post for a while at least until he had dealt with his PTSD.
"What bloody PTSD" he spoke through gritted teeth "Are you sure it's not yours you need to worry about, after all it was you that didn't notice Smurf after we came back" he watched as she staggered back a couple of paces, her eyes filling with those familiar tears he seemed excellent at making appear.
"That was just cruel Charles" as she turned and left him there in his room with his thoughts and wishing he had never said it, and didn't know why he did.
-OG-
The following day some of 2 section came to visit him, and he overheard Dangles saying that the girls had gone away for a couple of days on one of their Spa trips.
"Has Georgie gone with them?" he asked but wasn't sure if any of them would know.
"According to Dangles she hasn't" answered Brains with narrowed eyes wondering why he was asking, he had noticed things in Belize and wasn't sure what to think yet "Just Jacs, Molly, Katy, Lauren and Jenny."
"Any idea how long you are going to be here Boss?" continued Brains changing the subject "We were going to have a reunion for Smurf this year, it's been five years."
"Bloody hell" said Fingers shaking his head "Where has the bloody time gone?"
"Few more months yet Brains" smiled Charles, he really didn't want to go anyway as Candy appeared in his mind saying I gave the army my boys and they gave me back a flag "You had better count me out of that this time."
-OG-
The old original 2 section did get together for the reunion. Candy did come briefly to Laugharne and stood with them remembering scattering the ashes of both her boys up here. She was pleased to see Jackie as she had met Geraint although the rest of them had never met him. It felt that both her boys were being remembered here today as she linked arms with Jackie and Molly. She appreciated that his friends still remembered as she looked at them all standing there, all of them looking more like grown-ups after 5 years and wondering what her boys would look like now and would they be happy, would they have girlfriends or be married by now if they were still here.
"Where is Captain James" she asked
Molly patted her on the arm "I'm sorry he couldn't be here today Candy, he's still in Headley after being injured."
"I'm so sorry Molly that he's hurt again" sighed Candy "I'd better be getting back, thank you for inviting me" she smiled and hugged each of them saying goodbye and got in her car to go home.
They spent a raucous night in the pub remembering Smurf before all going back to their hotel.
"So, Captain James is still out of sorts is he?" said Fingers putting his arm round Molly's shoulders as they walked back to the hotel.
"What do you mean?"
"Well, he doesn't appear to be looking after himself in there does he, when we went in the other week he must have had a week's growth on his face and he looks….." sighing "Skinny."
"Well, all that physio, takes it out of him" she couldn't talk with Fingers about it, Charles was his commanding officer, but he seemed placated with her answer.
-OG-
Charles came home for a few weeks before starting the next phase of his rehab. He announced he was moving into the spare room as he didn't want Molly kicking his leg in her sleep he was still in a lot of pain.
The first night she heard him calling out in his sleep and went in to see him. He was thrashing about calling for Elvis and saying he was sorry. She got a damp flannel going back into the room and woke him, wiping the flannel across his face and chest to cool him. Whatever the dream was about he was dripping with sweat. She put her hand on his chest feeling his rapid heart rate as he put his hand over hers and they both fell back to sleep. That was the last time he slept in the spare room, Molly convinced him that if he stayed in their room she would be there if he needed her, if he was worried about his leg they could put some of the cushions between them to keep his leg safe. Although he didn't want to admit it he felt he slept better with her hand on him although he was conflicted at how much comfort and safety he still felt having her so close to him. He just didn't know why but if it got him a good night's sleep all the better.
-OG-
Sam came up and stayed with them for the weekend although he didn't feel up to taking him out, he was so bloody tired couldn't motivate himself and he didn't want Sam to know he was having problems, his son still idolised him even if no one else did. Still, he could sit there and play a game on the PlayStation with him.
"Dad?" Sam asked quietly when Molly was out at the shops and Charles smiled down at him "are you and Molly splitting up?"
"What made you ask that?" he could feel his heckles rising in irritation.
"I heard Mum and Gran talking that was all."
"Its adult stuff Sam and you don't need to worry about it, everything will be OK" he smiled ruffling his hair. "Molly and I are fine."
With the weekend finally over, Rebecca kindly coming to collect Sam as Charles still couldn't drive and neither could Molly.
Molly had barely closed the door and walked back into the living room before he launched accusations at her. "What have you been saying to my parents?" he seethed "Why does Sam think we are splitting up?"
"How the hell should I know Charles" raising her eyebrow "I ain't said nothing to your parents and maybe other people who know you well enough have noticed your behaviour lately?"
"It's hardly surprising I get a tad annoyed with you going on all the time about PTSD and trying to force me to leave the army.?"
"I haven't asked you to leave the army just come off active service for a bit."
"With this fucking leg I'm off active service for the foreseeable, so what's your bloody problem?" his eyes blazing "You've got what you wanted."
Her eyes filling with tears again and making his eyes roll with annoyance "No" she said quietly "I haven't got what I wanted."
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"You're not happy are you Charles?" both of them staring at each other neither of them knowing what to say next. He couldn't stop gazing at those green eyes, awash with tears that he had caused again, he felt so bloody useless, not one promise, not one had he kept. He couldn't deal with this again, as he managed to haul himself up off the sofa and left the room, slowly making his way up the stairs to their room.
He lay on their bed his hands behind his head staring at the ceiling, his eyes getting heavier as he fell asleep. He was back in Afghan again, his best friend falling from that roof as he knelt by his side he saw Elvis grinning at him "Don't worry mate, I'll look after her for you, make sure she doesn't get into trouble" promised Charles.
Elvis laughed "She misses me" and he watched as the scene changed and it wasn't his happy smiling friend anymore but the burnt one his eyes staring blankly at him the smile gone and a sneer in its place "You'll lose her" he felt himself shiver as he opened his eyes and the images were gone.
He sighed as he got up and walked slowly back downstairs to find Molly in the kitchen preparing some food. He knew he had upset her badly again as he walked up behind her and put his arms around her waist kissing the top of her head "Sorry" huffing a breath "Think it's just the worry about my future and going back to Headley again" he felt Molly nod in response against his chest but she didn't say anything.
Then he heard her voice talking quietly but without looking at him still concentrating on stirring the sauce into the mince she had been frying "Perhaps you just need to decide what you want, what's important to you?"
Charles grabbed her shoulders his heart turning over, it was like going over a hump back bridge lots of times, turning her to face him "You are important to me Molly" her eyes searching his wanting to believe him. His head coming down to meet hers as he kissed her, gently at first then as the memories came back harder, trying to show her that he did still care, for the first time in many months they made love and he felt like he had come home.
-OG-
Charles had been back at Headley a week now and he was getting to be quite an actor giving Oscar winning performances of making sure that everyone thought he was fine. He wasn't sure he felt that but even Molly was starting to believe he was OK and that there was nothing wrong with him other than his leg and that was improving. He was certainly putting the effort into it. There was no way he could let 2 section and Georgie go off on their own on another tour without him.
Molly had been in today, although they had a small argument in comparison to some of the humdingers they had had recently. She told him she was away on exercise for a few weeks so wouldn't be able to see him. He smiled and said not to worry it would give him more time to train and get fit and he would see her when she got back. Pleased in some ways that he would be alone to give him some peace, because that was what he got here.
-OG-
Molly wasn't fooled by his act, she could see he was just working harder at covering up his problems. He still looked tired to her, so she knew he must still be having nightmares, why would they suddenly stop when he had been having them at home. She was still concerned about his feelings for Georgie and where that left her and their marriage. Yes he had made love to her before he came back here, had been gentle, affectionate even made her feel special again but she couldn't help but wonder, was this all part of his denial of PTSD. If he had feelings for both Georgie and her where did that leave them? She knew he had a need to look after her because of Elvis but she just didn't think she could play second best.
She hadn't told him much about the exercise but then he didn't ask, just seemed pleased she was going on it and it would leave him free to carry on with his rehab.
It was bloody freezing, the assault courses, the weapons firing, map reading and even survival skills all adding to what she had done in basic and the CMT training. While it was cold, she enjoyed the company of Spanner and Peanut, both fit men and pushing her hard to keep up. They even had her jumping out a bloody helicopter hovering over a lake and she never thought she would do that. She hated water where she couldn't see the bottom, but Peanut jumped first and she followed.
Bones was true to his word, he had taken her to the training grounds in Catterick. Far enough away that no one would see her. He had got Peanut and Spanner to help, and even engaged Blue his Lieutenant to help. This is where the Para's train so he could really put her through her paces. He'd left Kingy with the training of 2 section in Pirbright and he would take her through that as well once they had finished. He wouldn't be able to stay there the whole month but Blue would take over.
Bones was already back in Pirbright when she completed the course and while it was hard and every muscle ached, as she looked at her arms and legs she couldn't believe just how many bruises she had acquired. Good job that Charles was still at Headley even he would notice and question this amount of bruising.
-OG-
She was meeting Jackie and some of the lads in a pub in Aldershot, she knew that Bones and Spanner were due there as well. Bones wanted to ask how it had gone in Catterick after he left. It was the best thing to meet in the open, hardly clandestine with all her mates there and they knew she knew Spanner anyway.
"Right" smirked Bones "You did well in Catterick, now we need to get your stamina up" he grinned "we start running from tomorrow."
"There's nothing wrong with my stamina, you'll be blowing out your arse mate" she grinned back taking a slurp from her Vodka and Coke.
He threw his head back laughing "Not if you keep drinking them all night, make sure you hydrate before I see you on the running track tomorrow" and she rolled her eyes, she knew that, she had done this in Basic
"We're leaving for Bangladesh in three months so I need to make sure you are ready for selection before I go."
"Still can't understand how you ended up with 2 section?" she shook her head.
"You and me both" he snorted a laugh "I obviously pissed off the Brig and this is my reward" he shrugged "Still they are all a lot fitter than they were when I got lumbered with them" he laughed. "Talking of which how is that husband of yours recovering from his leg injury?"
Molly shrugged "Getting there slowly, it's been six months now but still a way to go yet."
"You still think he has PTSD?" he asked. They had talked a lot over the months since he had started training her for Special Forces.
"Look mate, I know there is no love lost between you two and I will get to the bottom of it eventually" she grinned, "make you tell me the whole story" causing him to smirk back.
"Unlikely Dawes, you've yet to do the interrogation course" and she nodded taking another sip of her drink and going back to the question he had originally asked "I think he has just got better at covering it up."
"Is Lane still a problem?" and Molly shrugged again "Don't know mate, she seems to be avoiding me, hadn't come on our girly weekends, but if I'm honest I haven't really made much of an effort to contact her since I heard what he said."
"She will be coming with me and 2 section when we go to Bangladesh so maybe you can sort it out with her not being about."
"He's gotta want to though ain't he?" shrugging again, "And I'm not sure he does."
"True" he said taking a large gulp of his beer "But either way you are doing well with the training, whether the marriage sinks or swims this could be a good career opportunity for you" grinning "A female in Special Forces."
"Yeah and all those tossers trying to prove I can't do it or shouldn't even be there in the first place."
"We can deal with that as well Dawes" waggling his eyebrows and giving a lopsided grin "I think it's time that Blue and I started showing you the finer arts of self-defence."
"I can still give you a good smack round the chops mate" causing Bones to throw his head back laughing.
"I think you should give it a go with Special Forces, I think you would be good at it" he said getting serious "Come out of his shadow, realise your own worth."
Her eyes opened wide in shock "Bleedin hell Bones that was bloody deep weren't it?"
"You have to look forward Dawes" he shrugged "You can't keep looking backwards at what you could or should have done, it is what it is, and it will work out or it won't."
"Now there speaks a man who has probably never been in a relationship."
"True, look at the problems it causes if you do" he smirked "Best to just keep it simple."
"What you mean a quick knee trembler" she grinned as he howled with laughter "Don't knock it Dawes, it serves its purpose."
"So why ain't you tried to take me down the alley then?" as she sipped her vodka thinking after a stupid question like that this had really better be her last.
"I tend not to bother trying it on with women who are still in love with their husbands" he smirked leaning forward "But when you decide you don't anymore" he winked at her "let me know" as she howled with laughter herself.
"I think you're a good mate Bones."
"Good, I'm glad we got that cleared up" he grinned "and it really might be a good idea if you stopped drinking with what I have planned for your training tomorrow."
"Shit are we really going running?"
"Yes Dawes, but as its you 08.00 tomorrow so you can have a lie in."
-OG-
So the running round the track at Pirbright started and each day Bones increased either the speed or duration. The way he screeched at her bellowing orders to keep bloody going, he was a far harder task master than any of the trainers on Basic and that was saying something.
On another day he introduced her to Blue, who she did remember from Sierra Leone and he grinned down at her realising she didn't have a clue what Bones had planned for this session.
"Right Dawes" started Bones seriously "You are going to come across soldiers" he winked "and they're just the friendly's that don't think you should be on the front line, don't think…" he sniggered looking her up and down "with your diminutive stature you should be here, but between Blue and I you are going to learn to show them you do."
Three times a week she met Blue and Bones in the gym and they showed her self-defence. Don't use your fist, you might break a finger, use the palm of your hand, don't use your knee you might just make them angry and they get up, use your leg. Where to hit, what to use, if they attack from behind or in front. So much to learn and in all honesty she wasn't sure when or if she would ever be able to use it. Mind you if she had to move back home to East Ham it might come in handy, especially if she came across Artan. She actually really enjoyed these lessons with Blue and Bones, even if she never got to use any of them. They were patient and their dry humour made her laugh, even if she was supposed to be taking this seriously.
"Your tongue will probably get most of them to back down" grinned Blue as he was showing her yet another move "but the enemy doesn't know about that."
"Bloody cheek" she rolled her eyes as Blue sniggered.
-OG-
All the time Bones was making her run round the track at Pirbright. Two and a half hours he had her running now. "Good Dawes" he grinned "Next year perhaps we should try for the London Marathon, give it a go for charity?"
"What?" she replied gasping for breath one hand on her knee to stop her collapsing the other clutching her side with the stitch she was feeling in her side.
"London Marathon next year."
"You really are a head case ain't you if you think I could do that."
"Well, you have just completed a half marathon" he grinned looking at his watch "and in bloody good time I might add" then winking at her "you just need to keep training so you can do the other half."
"You fucking bastard" she huffed as he laughed at her.
"Next stop the fan dance, with full pack" he grinned.
-OG-
The months had been flying past as far as Molly was concerned. She was looking at herself in the full length mirror in their room. She couldn't help but keep looking at herself from different angles. She had been army fit before but this was a whole new level. Everything was toned, there wasn't an ounce of fat on her anywhere. Once the bruises had gone she felt she actually looked quite good.
Charles was due home for a couple of weeks before the next set of physio started and hopefully this would be the last lot. He had certainly been pushing himself hard this time. Molly thought he was doing it because he still thought he would be going to Bangladesh with Georgie and 2 section but he wasn't, Bones was still assigned to go with them.
He was still refusing to acknowledge he had PTSD and needed support. Whenever she saw him in Headley he had put on an amazing act of a fully functioning soldier but now he was home, he was quiet, sullen didn't particularly want to go out and when she suggested they visit his parents he refused saying he was too tired after his time in Headley.
He used every excuse in the book to stay up late, so they didn't go to bed at the same time. He always believed she was asleep when he came up but she wasn't. He never made any attempt to hold her, but lay with his back to her all feeding her belief that he meant what he had said to Georgie and he did have feelings for her. He just hadn't got the nerve to tell her yet; maybe that was what he was waiting for – her to say the marriage was over so he didn't have to. Taking the cowards' way out.
She could bear it no longer night after night like this as she turned over to look at his back knowing he wasn't asleep "Do you want to stay married to me?"
He rolled onto his back his hands behind his head as he sighed "Why do you always have to bring up things like this late at night when we are both tired?"
"Because it's the only time I have you to myself and we can talk" she whispered trying not to cry at his tone of voice "You didn't answer my question."
"Of course, I do" he sighed "But all the time you keep going on about PTSD, not going on tour, leaving the army not accepting that I have responsibilities" turning his head to look at her and wished he hadn't because there was that look again so looked back at the ceiling "there is nothing wrong with me and you need to accept that I am a Captain and this is my job, that's why I avoid talking with you because this is all you want to talk about."
Her hand slunk across the bed onto his chest and she could feel his rapid heartbeat "But what about us, do you not see we have problems?" she sighed "we don't do anything together anymore, we don't talk."
"Because this is all you want to talk about and there is nothing wrong with me" turning over again so his back was towards her causing her hand to drop away "You have always been able to look after yourself, you don't need me here to do that."
She couldn't help it as the tears ran down her face into the pillow "but I love you" she said in a barely audible whisper but he heard.
"and you're suffocating me with all this Molly" he sighed "this is all in your head."
-OG-
The time came that 2 section and Bones were due to leave for Bangladesh. She met up with him in the pub a couple of days before they were due to ship out. He wanted to go through the rest of her training he had lined up for her and Blue would continue in his absence.
"So, I'll be away on this tour when selection comes up, I hope you are going to go for it after all this effort" he remonstrated while taking a sip of his beer "You'd bloody better Dawes."
"May as well" she shrugged she still couldn't get it out of her head that Charles thought she was suffocating him.
"Not good enough Dawes" he growled at her "if you have any hope of getting through this you have to be positive" he shrugged "If it bothers you that much tell him you are trying out for Special Forces."
"He said I'm suffocating him" her eyes filling and blinking rapidly.
"I'm not sure I'm the right person to talk with about relationships, seeing as I don't want one" he smirked "But seems to me he has lost his way and only he can find his way back when he wants to, or more importantly if he wants to" he sighed. "So maybe he does think you are suffocating him if you are trying to push him to admit to something he is not ready to yet?"
Molly nodded "So I should go for selection then see if it makes a difference?"
"You go for selection because you want to Molly and you believe you can do it" he raised his glass "I know you can" taking in a big breath "At some point he will have that lightbulb moment, the one where he wakes up and realises what's happening."
"What should I do?
"You can't look at life through a set of wing mirrors" he started "life's short, and in our line of work it can be very short" taking a gulp from his drink "when you are a little old lady looking out the window watching the world go by make sure it's not full of regrets, look forward not backwards. Because it's not going to just be if he decides he wants to come back, it's whether you can forgive him for it."
Molly just stared at her friend, she had never heard him talk like this before, he was just this mad Special Forces Captain that had her running half marathons amongst other things. Bones grinned at her "So Molly Dawes what are you going to do?"
"Go for it" she grinned "If he wants me rather than Georgie he'll find me."
"Good girl" he beamed "Look ahead never behind."
"So you looking forward to this trip then" she grinned changing the subject and he raised an eyebrow at her "Yeah! 4 months with bloody 2 section and their antics" raising his glass as a salute "I expect to see you in Special Forces when I get back."
-OG-
It was three months since Bones, Georgie and 2 section had left for Bangladesh. Molly was still disappointed in her friend that she hadn't highlighted Charles misplaced feelings for her. Fingers had spoken with her twice now that Charles seemed out of sorts but not a word from Georgie, if anything she was avoiding her, hadn't gone on any of their nights out with Jackie and the rest while they were all down here in Aldershot. She didn't think that anything physical had happened between them, and she was sure that her friend wouldn't do something like that. But there was that little nugget of worry about why she hadn't spoken with her.
She was working in the stores the day when Jackie came in with Spanner. She could see by their demeanour that something was very wrong. Spanner took her hand and sat her down and told her that Bones was dead. She felt numb at first, she couldn't believe that someone like him had gone, he was so full of life. When Spanner explained what had happened it was so Bones, he would have wanted to save the guests and the section. Jackie and Spanner sitting either side of her as she sobbed on Jackie's shoulder.
"He's coming back to Brize tomorrow, we can pick you up if you want to be there?" and she nodded still unable to speak through her tears.
"Go home Molls" said Jackie "We can manage here and I'll let your CO know."
"I'll drive you" added Spanner.
-OG-
Charles was in barracks when he got a message from Beck asking him to go and see him. He went across to his office and was told that Captain McClyde had been killed in an assassination attempt in Bangladesh and was being repatriated tomorrow. His physio had been going well and as this was a humanitarian mission with refugees coming across to Bangladesh did he feel up to it to be the replacement Captain. He nodded enthusiastically, he couldn't wait to get out there with the section and Georgie. They would need to be kept on the straight and narrow now that Bones was gone and the sooner he got there the better to stop them losing focus, they would be upset at the loss of their CO and would need him to keep them together. She would need him.
He left the barracks straight away to drive home and start packing for the early flight. He would let Molly know when she came in later, not that she would be happy about it. As he drove home he couldn't remember the last time he saw her smile. He felt that tightness in his chest as he thought of it but shook his head and told himself to pull himself together and focus. Molly had shown over and over that she didn't need him, Georgie was the one that needed support.
He shot up the stairs and dug out his Bergen, he felt the adrenaline rush already about going on tour. He jumped out of his skin when he heard a small voice behind him.
"What are you doing?"
"I've got to go Moll I'm needed in Bangladesh" as he swung round he saw her tear stained face. She must have heard already "I'm sorry" as he put one arm round her and kissed the top of her head.
"Please don't go" he felt her sighing against his chest.
"I have to Molly, they need me out there."
She pulled back from him "I need you and what about us? Are you putting the army before us?"
He closed his eyes and shook his head "Please Molly not this again, we'll talk when I get back, I promise."
She looked at him and there was that stare again, the one that made him uncomfortable "I don't believe you, I don't think you want to talk about us at all. I don't know what it is you want Charles but I'm sure it isn't me anymore."
He had the most peculiar sensation, it felt like his stomach had dropped to his feet and he couldn't think of a thing to say as he stood motionless staring at her.
Breaking the silence between them she asked, "are you going to ring Sam before you go?"
"Can't you do it sweetheart" he kissed her forehead "I've got to be back in barracks and get the last things organised before I leave tomorrow."
She nodded a fresh wave of tears formed in her eyes as she watched him turn his back as he continued packing his Bergen. Standing there watching him pack to leave her again and knowing that he shouldn't be going and questioning how did no one realise that? What the hell was Beck playing at sending him on tour?
"Thanks Moll" he kissed her head again "Love you" and she watched his retreating back as he walked down the stairs and she followed. He opened the door and was gone without looking back once.
"Do you?" she whispered.
-OG-
The decision now made she would continue to go for selection, Charles had made it quite clear that he didn't want her, the army would always come first. All she could do is hope that one day he might get help that Georgie would notice and point him in the right direction. If she was lucky he might remember what they had and come back, but as Bones said, you have to keep looking forward. Whatever happened though, she didn't want to be based in Aldershot anymore, to have to keep seeing him knowing that he didn't love her anymore and had transferred those feelings to Georgie.
Charles had only been in Bangladesh a month and she had done her selection with the help from Spanner, Peanut and Blue. She just needed to decide on whether to take the offer. He hadn't phoned once in all the time he had been there. Whenever she had rung him he didn't answer and it went to voice mail. She thought she would try one more time and this time he picked up
"Look I'm pretty busy Molly" he said. Such a contrast from previous tours where they were always desperate to talk with one another.
"This won't take long Charles" she sighed "I know you're not happy…."
"Is this really the time or the place Molly, I'm on tour for fuck sake"
"It's exactly the time and place Charles" she huffed "Do you think we should put this marriage out of its misery?"
He was looking at Georgie coming into his office "Yes" he replied coldly and heard Molly gasp on the other end.
"OK, I'll be gone by the time you get back Charles". She couldn't talk any longer all she wanted to do now was cry. She had still had this hope that he wanted to stay with her still loved her but it seems she was wrong.
"What…." He answered but the line was already dead, she had hung up. He just leant against his desk staring into space, he couldn't believe this was happening to him, what was Molly playing at?
"You all right Charlie?" asked Georgie "was that a call from home?"
He couldn't talk for a moment and just nodded "Yes, Molly has just rung me to tell me she wants to put the marriage out of its misery."
"I'm so sorry Charlie" she whispered taking his hand.
"It changes nothing Georgie, my feelings for you, I'm here when you're ready."
"It's not easy losing someone so special, are you OK Charlie?" stroking his hand.
Charles nodded in response completely numb he had been pushing Molly away for…he couldn't remember how long and now that she had gone he felt completely empty, that something was missing. That nothing would be the same again.
-OG-
Somehow they had got involved with the Police Inspector and his corruption with prostitution and drugs to fund the health facilities of his wife. His son had been kidnapped. Georgie had got close to his wife and convinced her to help and get her husband to open up and tell who was behind all this.
It would seem that those who were behind it knew he was about to spill the beans and unbeknown to them a truck had pulled up outside the police station and parked. It wasn't long before it was detonated injuring all inside and making the Inspector rethink his reasoning to inform on his cohorts especially as his son was still being used as a pawn to keep him quiet.
Charles raced to the hospital as soon as he realised Georgie had been injured. He sat on the steps outside her room while the doctors were looking after her. He couldn't lose his only link to Elvis, the only person he could really talk to about him that knew him like he did.
Once he was given permission to go in and see Georgie he sat on the side of her bed looking at all the cuts on her arms and face, she looked so fragile and Elvis would expect it of him to see that she was OK as he put his arm round her shoulders.
"Charlie" she stuttered putting her hand on his leg "I was scared, really scared, I finally realised just how short life can be" she looked up at him as he held her "I've been covering up my feelings for a long time, maybe we could make this work, you and me?"
"As I said Georgie, we are bound together by Elvis" but as he said it he felt a pain in his chest, like he was struggling to breathe "We could make this work."
They collected her things and he drove them both back to barracks leaving her outside her quarters he walked to his own. Hearing his phone ring he looked at the caller ID and it was Molly.
"It's hectic here Molly, is everything OK at home?"
"Yes" she stuttered, she had wanted to hear his voice, know that he meant it, that he wanted to end the marriage. She hadn't expected him to be so abrasive "I just wondered if you would mind if I took the chest of drawers?"
"Take whatever you want Molly" he replied as he walked to his quarters and he thought he heard her make a yelping noise.
"OK thanks Charles" she said quietly in reply "Look after yourself won't you?" and she was gone.
This call had been her last hope that he would change his mind but he hadn't and she couldn't talk with him without sobbing and that would just make him feel worse so best to end the call.
-OG-
Georgie had virtually begged him to get Special Forces involved to assist with the rescue of the young boy, and he had agreed. Of course, he agreed how could he say no to her, she was so upset by his capture and since the explosion he was glad he had called them in. Special Forces had arrived and he met with Blue, Spanner and Peanut shortly after he arrived back from the hospital with Georgie. He hadn't met Blue before but found out he had recently been promoted to Captain and replaced Bones. They had discussed the rescue plans and ended the meeting. Charles felt that Spanner and Peanut were a little distant with him, formal almost as he showed them to the mess hall, they must be hungry they had only just flown in.
"Has he been in charge long?" asked Charles of Spanner.
"Just made up to Captain, this will be his first mission with this rank Sir."
Charles looked at Spanner with surprise at him addressing him as 'Sir', "Does he have the experience for this?"
Spanner gave him a look he didn't particularly like "Yes, absolutely he learned from one of the best."
"Who?" he queried "Elvis"
"Bones" sighed Spanner as he touched his arm, his tattoo hidden "Been assigned on plenty of operations to get experience, was there in Sierra Leone."
"Right" he didn't want to be reminded of that, it was when Elvis died as he walked away and back to his quarters leaving Spanner to join the rest of his group.
-OG-
Georgie had been pacing her quarters back and forth for ages, fiddling with Elvis' ring still hanging round her neck, thinking she had been so lucky the blast didn't kill her like Elvis and Bones had been. Why hadn't she been killed? She couldn't get Elvis out of her mind, what they had missed out on by his untimely death. That night they had spent together. Kept seeing his smile as they left for that last mission and she brought her ring to her lips. How had she only ended up with cuts and bruises and he had died. Would they have been married by now if he hadn't been, she missed him. She needed to see Charlie.
Charles had been lying on his bed, his hands behind his head staring at the ceiling. Why had Molly phoned about Chest of Drawers while he was on tour, surely they could have talked about this when he got home. He felt a peculiar butterfly sensation in his chest, she said she would be gone by the time he got back. He suddenly remembered them on that holiday in Arran, looking at the stars and she said it felt like they were the only two people in the whole world it was so beautiful.
He was still deep in his thoughts when he heard the knock at his door and he got up to open it. It was Georgie, looking vulnerable with those cuts to her face and her arm bandaged, he nodded to invite her in, remembering what Molly looked like after she came back from Bastion after crawling through that bloody minefield.
"Charlie" she whispered as her hands came up to his chest "I'm scared."
He wrapped his arms around her knowing how traumatic the last few hours must've been.
Her hands were round his waist lifting his t shirt over his head and she looked at him with tear filled eyes as she reached up to kiss him. She felt so alone and kept seeing Elvis smiling at her. This afternoon brought it home to her just how much she missed him.
It had been a while since he and Molly had been intimate like this, and he felt the longing for what they had lost. He didn't know how they had lost it but they had. She didn't need or want him anymore, she had told him they needed to put their marriage out of its misery. He could look after Georgie for Elvis, it's what his mate would've wanted to make sure she stayed safe.
Charles was lying in his bed with Georgie next to him and he turned his head away feigning sleep. They had talked and she said they had to remember that she wasn't Molly and he wasn't Elvis and he nodded in agreement while they declared that Elvis would always be a part of them, bond them together. But as he lay there he felt sick at what he had done to Molly, he knew no-one could be ever be Molly to him. He closed his eyes but sleep wouldn't come.
He could add coward to his list of failures, still pretending to sleep as dawn came and Georgie knew she had to leave they had broken army regulations and it would be devastating on both their careers if this should be found out now. Charlie was still married after all, his marriage only ended 24 hours ago over a telephone call thousands of miles apart, let alone any formal separation with Molly.
He was still asleep so she silently dressed and left his room, out of the corner of her eye she spotted Blue but didn't think he had seen her as she fiddled with the engagement ring still round her neck.
"Shit" sighed Spanner who was sat next to Blue while drinking tea "I wish I hadn't seen that."
"You've known Molly longer than me, would she want to know" said Blue taking a sip from his flask and sighing "He really shouldn't be on tour should he?" shaking his head "Molly is mates with her isn't she?"
"Yeah and with my wife" replied Spanner placing his flask on the ground and wiping both his hands up and down his face in distress taking in a deep breath "Shit" he said again "I can't believe he has done this to her."
"Well, we don't know the ins and outs do we Spanner" he sighed himself "Let's hope when we get back she has made the decision to join us, cos it won't be pretty when she finds outs about this and has to work with her at Keogh."
"Well after Molly's training with you and Bones I don't reckon on her chances or his when she finds out."
"Well let's just get this operation over with and get out of here."
-OG-
They all met in the ops room later that morning. Georgie felt a bit uncomfortable, she could see Blue and Spanner looking at her. She didn't know Blue but Spanner had been with Elvis so she couldn't understand why he was blanking her.
"So how did this all escalate to this level?" asked Blue "If the inspector has been smuggling drugs with refugees for years how come it has come to light now?"
"Well," grinned Georgie "I found a woman who was being used as a prostitute who told me about it."
"Where is she, can she verify the information?"
"No" interrupted Charles "She was killed."
Blue raised his eyebrows and sighed "Right" he sighed "So she wasn't given protection, her information wasn't escalated, and you thought you could deal with it?"
"Yes of course we thought we could" said Georgie defensively "How were we to know they would take the child?"
"That's why it should have been escalated Lane" answered Blue "You could have got the correct advice and appropriate orders on how to deal with this situation from those with specific experience."
"We are where we are" huffed Charles trying to defend her "So what is the plan?" although he couldn't help but notice the way Blue looked at him, made him feel that he had made mistakes and was once again being judged.
A plan was formulated, they knew what had to be done and they made their way to the house where the child was being held. The rescue was fairly text book and while they had to shoot the captors they were all un-injured and Georgie took the boy to Peanut who was waiting by the helicopter to take him to safety. Blue and Spanner following up on the ropes and leaving 2 section at the house.
Kingy called out a warning that men were arriving and by the looks of it heavily armed and lots of them. Captain James ordered the evacuation of the building and in the opposite direction to the approaching men.
When they arrived at the cliff edge he didn't know where they should go, they looked at first glance to be cut off but he didn't check his maps.
"We can't go back we have to go forward" said Georgie looking up at him nodding her head in the direction of the cliff, and he agreed. He gave the order to jump. They all took steps back to take a run hoping they would hit the water rather than the rocks below. "We can do this" said Georgie and again he nodded. He had no idea how the rest of the section felt about this order.
As he leapt off the side of the cliff he saw Molly. Her green eyes staring at him. She was dressed in combats, had her helmet on. He was back on the bridge where he was shot. She was looking at him with that familiar look, the one she had been using on him for a long time now. It was a mixture of fear, worry, concern and something else as she lent down near to him he could hear her pleading with him to stay with her.
"Stay with me" her eyes boring into his. "Please don't leave me" She hadn't been reading his mind at all. He felt a searing pain in his leg as he hit the water and shot up his back as his world went momentarily black.
He could hear voices, screams as he floated down the river his uniform and boots starting to weigh him down. He couldn't be bothered to save himself, there was nothing to live for. He was a screw up, messed up all his operations and now he had lost the one person who had stood by him. Tried to make him see. He had hurt and lost the love of his life.
"I thought I was the fuckwit, but you really know how to screw things up don't you Charlie" he saw his broken and burnt friend looking angrily at him.
"I'm sorry" he whispered.
"Too late now, she'll find out you know, she'll be devastated." Elvis sighed and started fading "What have you done Charlie?"
As Elvis disappeared, he realised what he had thought was Elvis telling him to look out for Georgie, he was actually telling him to keep hold of Molly. Just as the realisation hit him everything went black again.
-OG-
Molly raced to the hospital as soon as she had word Charles had been injured again and was on his way back to Birmingham. He had been sedated for the flight and was unconscious when she went into his room, she sat beside his bed and she stroked his hair back from his forehead, something she had done many times before.
She didn't know many of 2 section any more so popped across to see Brains and Fingers, Brains with a broken leg and cracked ribs and Fingers with a broken arm. Georgie had also been sedated for the flight back and she could see the cuts and bruises from what she assumed was the cliff jump. She put on her best smile and chatted with Brains and Fingers for a bit before leaving to sit in the waiting area again for news of Charles when the Doctor did his rounds.
She was chewing her thumb nail when she saw Blue walking towards her, from his expression and stance he had something to tell her and she wasn't going to like it. She listened while he told her what had happened out there. They had stumbled across a drug ring but instead of escalating it they thought they could deal with it themselves, culminating in the Police Inspector's son being kidnapped. He sighed looking down at his hands as he told her that Captain James seemed indecisive and he wasn't sure if it was him giving the orders but Corporal Lane. Then he told her he had seen Corporal Lane leaving his quarters early in the morning after spending the night with him. It gave him no pleasure telling her this as he was injured but he had to make a report and it would be better coming from him rather than hear about it in a disciplinary hearing and probably a court martial.
She felt her breathing get shallow, could hear her heart pounding in her ears as her heart shattered into a million pieces. It was a physical pain she felt as her hand went up to her chest. Her husband and her so called friend had betrayed her.
"Do you think his section know?" she asked quietly and Blue shook his head.
"Somebody has got to query he has PTSD now" she huffed "They chucked themselves off a fucking cliff for god's sake" she looked across to Blue "Please don't mention what you saw" Blue looked up and back at her "It won't just reflect on them, but all the whispers about him and me will start up again" taking in a lungful of air "I will have to walk through barracks with whispers of what they got up to on tour and didn't I know, how he must have a thing for medics" looking at him intently "Does it really have to go in the report, it was only cos you saw her leaving?"
"But he has PTSD Molly and his decisions are questionable, it could be risky if he stays on active service in this state" he huffed himself running his hand through his hair "Well both of them shouldn't be."
"But the fallout if you report this could be so much worse, for all of us" she pleaded "If he gets help he could stay in the army, if you report this it will be a dishonourable discharge."
Blue sighed "OK I'll leave it out but I still have to report that mistakes were made" and she nodded "So what do you want to do Molly, do you want me to give you a lift back to Aldershot?"
"I already accepted the position in Special Forces when he chose to go to Bangladesh, I just need to pack up my stuff and find somewhere new to live" looking down at her hands and blinking rapidly. "I'll see if Jacs can put me up for a couple of days while I sort out a room at barracks."
"As it happens" he grinned "Peanut is looking on a lodger to help with his mortgage, shall I give him a call?"
Molly nodded. "Jackie brought me up here, she's down in reception, can you give me a couple of days to get things sorted before I need to be in Hereford" and Blue nodded patting her arm. "I can give you a week compassionate" He could see she was shell shocked at what had happened. Bones would probably be better at dealing with this than him, not that Bones was more sensitive, because he wasn't he just knew her better. It didn't take an Einstein to work out that she was devastated at what Captain James and Corporal Lane had done. He had come to her with this partly because he liked her when he had been involved with her training and partly as loyalty to his old boss who had persevered and got her selection ready but then missed seeing her get in. He would have been so proud to see her make it. He would've wanted Blue to look out for her as part of the team.
-OG-
She called his parents from the hospital and told them he was going to be ok. She told them what had happened and how he had been injured, more time with physio again. As she told his mum that their marriage was over and she was leaving Aldershot, she sobbed down the phone no longer able to hold it together as she felt her world crashing down around her. Her relationship with his mum and dad had always been close, she heard the sadness in his mum's voice as she tried to reassure Molly that Charles loved her more than anything and tried to convince her to stay and work on their marriage, it would all be OK. Molly swallowed her sobs as she admitted what he and Lane had done. As soon as the words were out of her mouth she heard the gasp from his mum, who wished she was with Molly so she could hug her daughter-in-law as she sobbed down the phone.
It didn't take Molly long to organise things, Jackie helped her pack everything she wanted. Once she found out that Charles wouldn't be in hospital that long she wanted to make sure everything was in place and sorted before he got back. If he had moved on this quick she didn't want to be anywhere near to see how happy they were.
She was moving in a new direction and she couldn't shed anymore tears for the man she loved, she had cried a lake full of tears for him. If he could only realise he had PTSD, get help, then maybe he would remember what they had and would find her again. She had to have hope….
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A/N: Thank you all for your reviews on this story and I'm sorry this one couldn't give a happy ending but as there is a slight crossover I have altered the first two chapters of Road to Redemption. This is just my interpretation of the series
I have no other story ideas and only got these because of the various lockdowns we have been in over the last year and it's helped keep me occupied. Hopefully with the vaccine, this will be the last time we have to do this and tomorrow is the next phase of the country opening back up. So looking forward to seeing friends again, even if we do have to sit outside in coats having lunch.
So many good stories on here and really looking forward reading to all your updates.
Take care