Author's note: So it has been a very long time, but I'm back! And I'm ready to finish this story. Hoping to update once a month. Enjoy!
Chapter 27 – Charming a Map
The beginning of May chased away the coldest weather. The days grew longer, and the sunshine coaxed the students out onto the grounds during their free time. Unfortunately, the fifth-year students were finding very little of their time could be considered 'free'. OWLs were now only six and a half weeks away, and it felt both close and far away.
Even the most studious of students knew the month of May held an even more important event – the upcoming Quidditch Final. With the game being less than two weeks away, it was the main focus of the student body. Older students were taking bets. Ravenclaws and Hufflepuffs were picking sides. Insults were thrown around in the hallway between Gryffindors and Slytherins. The Headmaster Dumbledore stood up at breakfast to remind them that magic was still strictly forbidden in the hallways.
Gallagher was as worried as some of the Professors in the escalating encounters between the two houses. The Quidditch Captain had spoken to the team as a group and then taken the Marauders to the side the same day. He reminded them to keep a close eye on James and to not let the Slytherins provoke them into a fight. They all knew there was a real possibility that McGonagall would bench James from the game if he became entangled in any trouble.
Despite the worry of the Professors and the Gryffindor team, the rising tension had yet to yield any physical attacks. When Sirius brought this up, James shrugged.
"I didn't think he was really serious about the truce…but so far it's been holding."
"Who are you talking about?"
"Regulus."
"My brother Regulus?"
"Do you know of any others?"
"He wanted a truce?"
"He said it would more satisfying to deal us a crushing blow of defeat if we are all there in full form."
Sirius raised his eyebrows in response.
"Don't worry we are treating the truce with a healthy dose of skepticism."
While Sirius had a lot of negative things to say about this brother, this idea of truce coming from Regulus wasn't that odd. His brother had always been for fair play; a trait that put him at odds with his housemates.
Sirius didn't want to be thinking about his brother any more than he wanted to send this letter to his parents. He hated asking his parents for anything. He'd rather lick Snape's greasy hair. But his parents had written back to the Potters and they would not even entertain the request until hearing directly from Sirius. He was being forced to plead with his parents for their permission to stay at the Potters. If it were up to him he would have told his parents exactly where to shove it, but James (probably after speaking with his parents) convinced him to play their game.
He folded the letter quickly, sealing in the envelope before he would change his mind. Sirius scrawled his parents' address and beckoned the family owl down from the rafters. The owl nipped at his fingers before allowing him to tie it to his leg.
"Feel free to get lost," Sirius muttered as he watched the owl fly into the horizon. That's when he heard the bell for the start of class ring. He sighed heavily, having spent longer at the owlery than he'd expected, he was now late for Defense Against the Dark Arts.
An unexcused lateness in Keenan's class was an automatic detention with at least 10 points lost. So as Sirius slipped into his seat he was surprised when Keenan told him to see him after class with no defined punishment. Despite feeling disgruntled about having to deal with his family, Sirius did find the material of the class interesting, and that was not often the case for a lesson that involved more theory than wand work.
"Do you want us to wait for you?" James asked quietly as he packed up his belongings. Class was now over.
Sirius shook his head.
"Meet you back at the dorm? I still have those questions for Potions to finish…"
"That's fine," Sirius answered. He noticed James glance back at Peter with a slight frown, which he immediately turned into a neutral expression when Remus looked up.
It wasn't easy to argue with one friend while trying to prevent the other friend from finding out. In a rather strange twist of events, Peter was on one side of the argument while James and Sirius were on the other (with Remus having no clue any of it was going on). A little more than 48 hours ago, James and Sirius had brought up to Peter their idea of telling Remus (very carefully) that Snape was never going to blab his secret. Peter had quickly challenged their plan, and even James was unable to sway Peter's opinion.
Sirius had expected Peter to cave within a day of disagreeing with them. Yet here they were in a standstill. James was adamant they would not bring it up to Remus unless they were all in agreement. Sirius went back and forth from wanting Peter to cave and hoping Peter would not, so that they would never actually have to tell Remus. They were all keenly aware that there was a high chance Remus would feel so completely betrayed that their friendship would be not repairable.
"Be a good dog," Remus murmured as he walked by behind Peter with a smirk causing Sirius to almost burst out into laughter.
The last of the students filtered out of the classroom, and Sirius turned his attention to the front of the room. Professor Keenan was already walking around his desk to stand in front of it, leaning casually and perhaps waiting for Sirius to speak first.
"I'm sorry I was late, Professor. I was sending a letter to my parents and…it took more time than I thought." It wasn't a lie. It had been difficult. "Suddenly they are worried that I might be forced against my will to do something."
Keenan's expression stayed stern, but there was something in his eyes that Sirius knew the irony of his statement had gotten through to his teacher. "While I understand the difficulty in the task, that does not mean there will be no consequences for being late. I'm taking twenty points off Gryffindor."
"Yes, sir." He wasn't going to complain about the points lost when he had dodged a detention. He hoped when McGonagall was informed of the infraction, she wouldn't decide to add her own. McGonagall had done that on previous occasions over the years.
"And as promised I have done additional review on the book about the Homoculus Charm," Keenan began causing Sirius to suddenly straighten up with a new interest in the conversation. "I've concluded there is nothing inappropriate in there, so you may have it."
"I can have it?" Sirius asked dumfounded. He had already assumed he would need to use other means to get the book. While no plan was in motion, mostly because his partner in crime James was too preoccupied with Quidditch, he'd formed a plan in his head.
"Yes." Keenan turned to pick up the book off his desk and held out the book. "Take good care of it. It's on loan from a friend, so I'll need it back before end of the term."
"Thank you, sir," Sirius stated sincerely.
"Now go. I don't want to hear your late to any of your other classes, Mr. Black," Keenan cautioned.
"Yes, sir."
As he walked back to the dormitory, he felt a renewed rush of energy having successfully gotten the book. Though underneath it all, he did feel slightly ashamed at having deceived his teacher. Keenan did seem to want to genuinely help him. While they weren't using the information for any nefarious reasons, the map would help them with rule breaking. It was unlikely Professor Keenan would ever find out his role in this and that was enough for Sirius to ignore any lingering guilt.
The lines on the page in front of James were starting to blur. He blinked several times and focused his eyes on the words in front of him. He ran a hand through his hair sighing deeply. James looked around the almost empty library. This was the third time this week he was in the library until close, and it was a trend he did not want to continue. The increase of Quidditch and relentless work by the Professors was forcing him to make this a priority.
Besides Sirius, the only other person in the vicinity was Lily Evans. Less than half an hour ago she'd been surrounded by friends. Now she sat cross legged; taking full advantage of the empty table. James studied her profile, as she twirled a strand of her hair absentmindedly, wishing he'd made more progress this year with her. He had asked her out once to Hogsmeade, and she had turned him down. That was at the beginning of the year, and he knew nothing had changed in their interactions to make him think she'd give a different answer.
Sirius stood abruptly (having packed all his belongings while James had been lost in his thoughts) and James threw him a quizzical look.
"You can thank me later." The grin on his best friend's face worried him immediately. He was right to be on guard because Sirius proceeded straight towards Lily.
"Evans, are you staying until the library closes?" Sirius asked, loudly enough for James to hear, though not attract the attention of the nosy librarian.
Lily shrugged. "Looks like it. I still have another foot of this essay to write." She tilted her head suddenly suspicious. "Why?"
"Great, you can walk back James to the dormitory then! Thanks."
Lily's eyes flicked between Sirius and James, and James tried to pretend he wasn't listening. "Black, wait."
Sirius turned, trying and failing to look innocently perplexed. "Yes?"
"Is there a reason Potter can't walk back himself?"
"Really, Evans? Is that a serious question you are asking me?"
"I'm not following." She wisely ignored the pun.
"Does Gallagher's announcement ring a bell?"
"Oh," she said slightly exasperated. "Right…Quidditch."
In addition to speaking to the team and the Marauders, Gallagher had gone one step further, calling a mandatory meeting for all Gryffindors. In order to prevent a player from being ambushed, Gallagher had instructed that no Quidditch player was to walk the hallways alone at any time. Their fellow Gryffindors had taken to the task rather enthusiastically.
"So will you do your solemn Gryffindor duty?"
Lily rolled her eyes. "Fine."
"Ta, Evans!" As Sirius turned around he winked at James. At any other time of the year, James would have gladly taken advantage of alone time with Lily. Today he was sore from practice, exhausted, and he wasn't sure he was up for even the simplest of conversations and especially not the usual banter that he exchanged with Lily.
"Sorry about him," James called out. "He's just...look I can walk back on my own. Really."
Lily looked as if she was deliberating something and then shrugged. "We are going to the same place. We might as well walk together."
James knew he shouldn't look for a deeper meaning behind the simple statement. She was doing what any Gryffindor would do in the same situation. Then again Lily was never afraid to go against the grain of what was expected.
She quickly immersed herself back in her work, and James did the same (except for the occasional glance in Lily's direction), knowing if he didn't finish this tonight, he would have to hand it incomplete.
An hour or so later (James's Charms essay still uncomplete), the librarian announced the library was closing. She swooped by them with a warning not to dawdle as if they weren't already in the middle of packing up their belongings. The two strolled out of the library nodding at some of the other stragglers – all from other Houses.
"Did you get all your work done?" Lily asked.
James sighed loudly. "No. I can't seem to get ahead of it…"
"I don't expect it to get easier until after OWLs."
"It will once I don't have quidditch practice anymore."
"Gallagher is really running you ragged?"
James nodded. He adjusted his bag wincing at the bruise on his shoulder. He'd been nicked by a Bludger during practice, and he'd refused going to the nurse, worried she'd force him to take a break. He'd use one of the bruising creams from Remus's stock. "It will be worth it when we win."
Lily glanced sideways at James and he was sure she was going to say something about winning the Quidditch Cup wasn't everything and OWL scores were more important. Instead she allowed his statement to stand.
The walk back to the Tower was silent and amiable. They passed the Hufflepuff Prefects during their rounds along the staircase and they were in front of the Portrait of the Fat Lady in no time. Lily said the password and James wondered if he imagined the Fat Lady giving him a wink. There was a large group of sixth years sitting by the fire – looking completely relaxed without OWLs or NEWTs on their minds.
At the staircase that separated the boy's and girl's dorms, Lily paused. "Take care of yourself, ok?" She said the words quietly so no one else in the room could hear.
James was so caught off guard by the sincerity of her words that any flirty comeback about her being worried about him died on his lips. Instead he felt his face grow warm and he could see she was slightly embarrassed as well.
"Night, Evans," he managed as he watched her ascend upstairs. He ran a hand through his hair. He must really look awful if Lily was worried for his wellbeing. He knew once Sirius heard of the exchange, he was going to take full credit. Still that had been the friendliest conversation he'd had with Lily that year. As James ascended the stairs, even the weight of all his unfinished work couldn't dampen his good mood.
"I look ridiculous," Peter complained as he walked in a circle around the room flapping his arms. James snorted from his bed. He was knee deep in a pile of papers filled with plays and strategies for the next Quidditch game. James's sole focus for the week was Quidditch.
"A few more times," Sirius instructed staring hard at the sheet of paper, willing one of the three dots to move. The book from Professor Keenan was indeed the missing information they needed. The magic was complicated and even with some instruction, Sirius was running into a wall. James had no free time at the moment. Remus was doubling down on studying which only left Peter to help Sirius (ironically Peter needed to revise far more than Remus).
"Anything?" Peter asked peering at the paper as he walked past it.
"Hmmm I think one of the dots budged but-" Sirius stopped speaking because at the same time Remus entered the dormitory, a fourth dot had appeared and it was moving.
"Moony stop!" Sirius shouted. Bewildered Remus stopped walking, and to Sirius's excitement the dot also stopped. "Ok start walking again."
Shrugging Remus began moving and the dot continued moving until Remus paused at the foot of his bed. "Are you going to tell me what that was about?"
"Brilliant," Sirius said ignoring Remus's question. Sirius beckoned James over. "Remus, keep moving."
Perhaps with other friends Remus would have further questioned, but with a resolute sigh, he circled around the room exactly as Peter had. ("Why doesn't he have to flap his arms?" Peter asked under his breath.)
"It's working," James said grinning widely.
"The map?" Remus asked catching on to the topic on hand. He joined his friends around the piece of parchment.
"This dot," Sirius explained, "is you. When you move, it moves."
"Just me? The other dots aren't moving?"
Sirius shrugged. "It's only picking you up at the moment…"
"I have an idea," James interrupted brightly. "Peter, leave the room for a moment and then come back in. Wait for us to tell you when."
Peter sighed loudly, though he follows James's instructions. One of the dots disappeared as Peter left.
"Ok, come in," James instructed. As Peter re-entered, his dot reappeared and was now tracking his movement. Sirius and James both let out a cheer.
"My dot's moving?" Peter asked excitedly, forgetting his annoyance quickly. James and Sirius followed suit, and now there were four dots tracking their movement within the dormitory.
Once the initial excitement had worn off, James was back on his bed and Peter was working on homework. Sirius was still flipping through the book from Keenan with Remus sitting across from him. There was a pile of books in front of him, but Remus had yet to start working.
"Have you spoken to Snape recently?" Remus voiced suddenly. There was a forced nonchalance in his voice.
Sirius jerked his head up, completely caught off guard. With all that was going on James, Sirius, and Peter had sidelined their disagreement. They were going to wait to tell Remus about the revelation of Snape's silence on his lycanthropy until after the Quidditch final, and perhaps even until after OWLs.
Sirius forced himself to meet the werewolf's eye. "No, I haven't. Why has he said something to you?"
"He's been saying things to me for a while," Remus said darkly. "This threat was more specific… as if something had changed. Has something changed?"
Sirius was at a loss for words. Of course, Remus's suspicion was directed at him, and he could hardly blame his friend. The silence in the room thickened; the silence revealing more than any words.
"I see. And when were you going to tell me? In a letter after I'm expelled?" Remus demanded; the fury in his eyes was unsettling.
Before Sirius could even think of the proper words to defend himself, James said quietly from his bed, "It was me."
Remus flinched at the words. "What?"
James stood up, stepping away from his bed and closer to Remus. "I hexed Snape last week. That's what changed."
"You hexed Snape?" Remus repeated. He put a hand on his head, squeezing his eyes tight as if he could make this nightmare of information disappear.
"I did," James replied as Remus opened his eyes. Remus looked ready to protest, but James held up his hand, remaining very calm. "I will explain, if you let me. Please sit down."
"I don't want to sit down," Remus argued. He started pacing, as he always did when stressed.
"Please sit down," James repeated.
Taking a deep breath, Remus sat back down in the seat he had been occupying.
"I hexed Snape because he's a git." Remus almost bolted with that first statement. Though James held out his hand and continued undeterred. "I also knew he wasn't going to spill your secret."
"Of course he's going to tell!" Remus shouted. "Why wouldn't he?"
"Well he hasn't, has he?" James countered. "And I knew because of what happened to Sirius earlier."
Remus jerked his gaze from James to Sirius, and Sirius could see in his eyes exactly what he was thinking; that another debacle with Snape had started with him.
James launched into the story of Snape following Sirius and the resulting conversation about werewolves that was overheard by Lestrange and the other Slytherins. Sirius watched as Remus listened to James, though he was unable to read the werewolf's mood.
"That's twice- with Sirius and then with me - Snape had the opportunity and he wasted it," James reasoned.
"He promised Dumbledore. He's keeping his word. That's all," Remus argued. "And going after him now – pushing him – that's only going to make it more likely that he'll tell!"
"Do you honestly believe if a few weeks detention were on the line, Snape would have stopped at the chance of getting us expelled?"
When Remus did not respond, James added quietly, "We think Dumbledore has something on him. Expulsion worthy."
"If you had just left Snape alone – if you hadn't bullied him – if –" Remus shook his head. "We wouldn't be here right now." Remus was still caught in the past. The 'what-ifs' of years ago. It was too late to think of what they could have done differently.
"This isn't one sided," Sirius argued, unable to stay quiet any longer. "Snape is as much a part of this as we are. Have your forgotten how he was following us around? He wanted to get us expelled – you expelled."
"I haven't forgotten," Remus said, his gaze hardening as he looked at Sirius. "I'm well aware that I was Snape's target. He knew I was the weakest."
"That's not why," Peter interrupted. "You aren't the weakest." And Peter didn't have to elaborate on who was the weakest of their group. "S-Snape saw how we all protected you. He saw we were covering something up – a secret involving you."
"Don't you see, Remus thinks he's above the rivalry," Sirius said, his grey eyes fixed on his friend. "Don't you? Present yet not involved. In private disapproving of our actions. In public treating Snape with civility that he doesn't deserve."
"What's wrong with that?"
Sirius no longer cared about sparing Remus's feelings. Remus needed to hear this. "Look where it got you."
"Are you saying this is my fault?" Remus asked incredulously. As he said these words, he stood, both hands pressed against the table, leaning over.
"You are as entangled in this mess as the rest of us, and it's because Snape doesn't care. He doesn't want your kindness…If anything he despises it."
Sirius wasn't quite sure where that came from, but he knew it was true the moment the words were spoken. Being associated with the people hexed him was enough for Snape to see him as an equal enemy.
James interjected quickly, "I don't think Sirius means-"
Remus pushed away from the table, crossing his arms, glaring at Sirius. "No, James. He does mean it."
Sirius sighed. "I only bring it up because you are dealing with Snape and the situation in the wrong way."
"And what's the right way? An eye for an eye? Fuel the fire? Make matters worse?"
"Not make it worse – even. You've apologized. You've stayed out of his way. You let him get away with words and actions without consequence, and yet he still hates us and he still hates you."
"He doesn't respond to that," James said, and Sirius was relieved that at least one person was catching on to the point he was trying to make.
Sirius nodded. "Snape will respond to you pushing back – to you standing up to him. Your secret is safe. It has always been. And now it's time to tell him to back off."
"So… what this is really about is getting my permission to hex Snape?"
"We don't really need your permission for that," Sirius replied callously.
Remus blinked, shook his head at the absurdity of the sentence he'd just heard, and then began walking towards the door.
"For Merlin's sake," Sirius called out. "Sit back down. If this was only about hexing Snape, we'd just do it you know? We wouldn't bother with this conversation." Sirius fell back into the chair in frustration. He could sense that James felt he'd taken the conversation too far. Without a glance at his best friend, Sirius grumbled, "Don't look at me like that, James. You were the one to hex Snape. You didn't wait to talk to Remus first."
James sighed, took off his glasses, rubbed his eyes tiredly, and put them back. "Remus, we don't want you to worry. We want you to feel safe."
"I don't," Remus answered loudly, and then lowering his voice. "This doesn't make me safer."
"I tried to tell them," Peter mumbled, turning slightly pink as both Sirius and James frowned at him.
"Well don't feel too bad, they don't listen to anyone, do they?" Remus said.
The words rang with truth, but it didn't mean they didn't sting. Then there was the terrible silence as they all stared at each other.
However, Sirius wasn't going to back down or apologize. He was convinced that Remus's approach to this all was making the situation worse. It helped that James did not retract his opinion the matter either. If he had, Remus would assume that Sirius would eventually as well and this whole terrible conversation would have been a waste.
Remus grabbed one of the books that he'd placed on the table before settling on his bed, yanking the curtains around him and ignoring them all. Peter settled on his bed as well not making eye contact.
Sirius turned to James in frustration, but James only shrugged and began to look over the Quidditch plays once more. And really what could James say to make this better?
Sirius stared down at the dots on the Map a pit forming his stomach. While it might not always be obvious, the opinion of his friends (all of them) did matter to him. He knew that despite their best efforts to paint this in a different way, Remus felt disappointed and betrayed. He poked at the map with his wand annoyed. Somehow after all these months Snape without even being present or aware had the ability to fracture their group into pieces.
Author's note: That last part of the chapter was difficult to write. Let me know what you think! Reviews are always appreciated.