Chapter 9

-Brian-

About an hour after sunset, I met the team at the start of the Boardwalk, near a kiosk selling Protectorate merchandise. Lisa waved me over while Taylor was swiveling her head around, looking at every passerby and store window, holding what seemed to be a photo in her hands. Aisha and Alec were chatting.

Wait. What?

"What are you doing here, Aisha?" I asked as soon as I walked up to them.

"Hanging out with my new friend, duh," she answered, rolling her eyes.

"Why'd you bring her?" I asked Lisa. The blonde just grinned at me.

"It's either that or have her stay in the loft with Rachel. We decided we'd rather not come back to find the entire warehouse on fire."

"And why," I asked patiently, "was she in the loft in the first place?"

"Figured I'd leave dealing with Mom to you," Aisha answered as if it was obvious. "Since, y'know, you spend less time around her so you're not as sick of her?"

"Hey!" Alec complained. "I thought you said you were there to steal our food?" He threw his hands up when he realized nobody was paying him any attention, grumbling sarcastically about theft at least being proper villain behavior.

"Anyway, we're taking Taylor shopping, we'll grab outerwear first since she'll likely go through it faster," Lisa said, dragging Taylor off by the elbow. Aisha followed them into the nearest store, leaving me alone with Alec. I glared at his innocent whistling.

"If I catch you flirting with my sister," I threatened, "it's an hour of full-contact sparring every time."

"Fine I won't." Alec threw his hands up defensively, taking a step back from me. "Let you catch me, that is." He dodged out of the way as I tried to grab him, but instead of running off he just tilted his head thoughtfully. "Besides, Taylor already seems to be planning to give her the hickey of a lifetime."

I just shook my head and followed the girls. The shopping trip was thankfully brief considering the late hour, though more than a few cashiers were confused by Taylor's antics.

To be fair, I'd look sideways at a girl getting into a screaming match with a mannequin in my store too. Aisha and Alec egging her on probably didn't help.

"Famine does not befit a woman!"

"You may not have eyes, but I see you see me!"

"Your nose is made of lies!"

On the way back to the car, a teenager bumped past me, stepping on my shoelace while he was at it.

"Hey, watch it!" I shouted. He ran without looking back. I felt around for my wallet, and wasn't surprised to find it missing.

"I'd have expected you to catch him, you know," I looked at Taylor. Finds Hookwolf in the entire city, can't spot a pickpocket…

She just grinned smugly, but the grin faltered against my decisively unamused expression. I'd had more than enough of that from Lisa, and Taylor still needed a lot of practice. The blonde looked at her, then looked at me, volunteering a demonstration which Taylor pointed at enthusiastically rather than mimicking.

"But the rat's cheese is already mine," the vampire announced, holding up both hands. In her left was my wallet. In her right, another one. "It is a poor thief that does not watch his own pockets," she added while muffled cursing came from around the corner. I took my wallet back from her while she pocketed the other. I tried to take a step, but remembered my shoelaces had gotten untied when the thief stepped on them.

"Hold that for a sec, will you?" I said and handed her the bags, then leaned down to re-tie my shoe. When I stood back up, she was trying to hold them all up with her pinky finger, barring the one she was still trying to hook onto it. I took the bags back and shot Lisa a glare.

"You mean to tell me she could carry them all, and you still had me play pack mule?"

Aisha was the one to answer the question instead.

"Well, bro, it's called 'being a gentleman'. You know? For your girlfriend?"

I was spared having to answer that by Taylor wrapping her in a hug from behind.

"T'would be a weird thing, methinks, to dabble with one's own sister's brother." The vampire let Aisha go, taking the chance to muss up her hair again. We headed back to my car, following the last shoppers out of the Boardwalk. I was still trying to decide whether Aisha was safer with the team, sleeping in the same room as an insane cape, or at Mom's place which was less likely to be attacked but had nobody there to guard her when we had to slow down to squeeze past a rubbernecking crowd. It was easy to look over their heads to see the cause of the commotion - Assault and Battery were passing through on a patrol.

"Taylor, please be...have…" I trailed off, noticing the girl was already gone. Oh boy. I watched her slip into the crowd of autograph-seekers, while the others watched her and grinned. When she finally made her way to Assault, she spoke to him, dashing any hope I had of this trip not going wrong.

"Kind words for my new sister?" she asked, voice carrying across the crowd, offering him the photo she'd been carrying around the entire trip and a pen. He took it and started signing, while Battery continued chatting with the crowd. When Assault was halfway done signing, he paused to look at her questioningly.

"Who am I making this out to?"

"Imp!" Taylor nodded cheerfully.

"...Imp?"

"...The Impatient Imp?" she elaborated, seemingly uncertain what was wrong.

"Ah. A younger sibling, then?" Assault chuckled at Taylor's slow, serious nod. "To the Impatient Imp, from Assault," he said, handing the photo and pen back to Taylor with a flourish.

She perked up again. "Assault, a salt, but what kind of salt? There are so many and only one of you!" she spoke with an eagerness in her tone that made it sound like she was asking a Zen master for the secret to enlightenment. To his credit, Assault barely missed a beat.

"Porcini sea salt, of course!" he said with an easy grin that made me wonder if he'd been waiting for the setup.

"The mushroom that is like a pig? A fitting answer indeed," she nodded. Battery muttered something under her breath that could've been 'some kind of pig, at least', and Assault put his hand over his heart and shot her a look of betrayal.

The crowd was already making enough noise that I missed Assault's next words, but they were likely typical of the hero, judging by the fact Battery cuffed the man upside the head, and Taylor paused to stare.

"The new meaning of your old name has grown well on you, Miss Capacitor," she cheerfully proclaimed, then stepped back and disappeared into the still-laughing crowd while the heroine tried and failed to keep track of her. A few moments later, she was by Aisha's side, handing her the signed photograph of Assault and Battery.