AN: I hope everyone has been safe and well. I'm sorry for the delay, it's been tricky finding a rhythm of writing. Thank you though to the wonderful ASadAir who encourages me to keep going and ensures this story is consistent and precise. Also, thank you new readers (and re-readers) who have left me comments in recent weeks. Your comments definitely motivated me to get back to publishing updates!
Unlocking the door to his dorm, Dan feels oddly underwhelmed being back in his dorm room. Perhaps subconsciously he expected to return from winter break a changed man.
But nothing's changed. His friendship with Blair remains the same. His roommate is still never around and virtually non-existent. And he still feels like a grand romantic declaration is waiting to pour out of him.
He just can't quite figure out where he and Blair are heading these past few weeks. On New Year's Eve, it seemed they were both open to exploring something more beyond friendship. Then, they spent the afternoon in Brooklyn and although he was physically close to her and outside the confines of the classroom and Yale, it felt like they drifted even farther apart.
At the time, he decided it was probably just her hangover and it would pass. But, after seeing how distant she was, he determined it was best to keep his feelings to himself. Although they were constantly connected by text, the days that followed between New Year's and spring semester were spent apart, until at last they were in his dusty old car headed back to New Haven.
Now that he's back on campus, he still has the feeling that Blair remains far from his reach despite their proximity. Dan sighs and begins unpacking.
By sunrise the next morning, Dan is filled with enough enthusiasm attempt a return to normalcy. It's the first day of classes, two of which are shared with Blair. It'll be easy to fall back into their old and familiar rhythm, he hopes.
As he walks into his second class of the day, Introductory Film Writing and Directing, he finds himself wondering if his feelings will have melted along with the snow from winter break.
He feels a tap on his shoulder and turns, "Hello, do I look directorial?" It's Blair and she's wearing an all-black ensemble with her hair pulled back in a sleek ponytail.
"You look like Audrey Hepburn in Funny Face."
Beaming, she turns and follows him up the steps. Having arrived early, they slide into two seats toward the back in the empty lecture hall. "How was Postmodern Italian?"
"It was fascinating and it's only day one. You're missing out." Dan replies dryly. "Latin 125b?"
"Epperly is in my class so it was great." She smiles. "I have a good feeling about this semester."
When she looks at him, he feels a sharp dip in his stomach that signals the feelings from winter break are just as alive as ever. He manages to say. "Me too."
"I don't suppose you want to know why I have a good feeling, do you?" Blair asks.
He doesn't know why but he feels oddly hopeful as he replies. "I would like to know."
"Well I hope I'm not jinxing myself but I think Georgina might be gone… She didn't show up yesterday and then this morning when I woke up all of her things were gone." Blair explains. "You haven't heard anything have you?"
"I have not." Dan is suddenly curious. "What exactly happened again when you ran into her?"
The light in Blair's expression fades. "I don't even remember exactly. Anyway, I shouldn't get my hopes up. She probably went on a winter break shopping spree at Pottery Barn and has a new dresser and desk arriving this afternoon."
"Roche Bobois." Dan says before he could stop himself. "She likes Roche Bobois. I wish I didn't know that."
The light in Blair's eyes fully extinguishes and her disappointment is evident in her tone. "Right. Silly, uncultured me."
There's a deeper emotion clouding over her features that he can't place. It feels like he's missing something, but before he can ask her, the professor takes her stance at the podium, ending this opportunity for clarity.
The following day Dan and Blair share Classic Hollywood Narrative and this time, Blair passes Dan a note. The note passing lasts long enough for Dan to feel like yesterday was a blip and that he simply imagined the wave of anguish that came over Blair at the mention of Georgina's shopping preferences.
By Friday, it feels like they are back on track as they review their syllabi and notes from the week in the library. Dan remembers that he hasn't told her the exceptionally great piece of news he's been saving until he was certain.
"Hey," He uses a low tone, leaning closer even though they're alone in a reserved room. "I have some news you may find interesting."
"What's that?" Blair seems distracted, only briefly glancing up from her notebook.
"It involves Georgina."
Blair closes her notebook. "Okay, I'm listening."
"Serena last night confirmed that Georgina has officially deferred. The last Serena heard, she was on a plane bound for Dubrovnik." Dan keeps his expression neutral, waiting.
"Dubrovnik, Croatia correct? There's not another Dubrovnik somewhere in the vicinity of Yale? I want to make sure I have this correct."
"Over 4,000 miles, I believe."
Blair looks at him and says very calmly, "I suppose this is cause for celebration."
She packs up her books and then pulls out her phone. After a brief rhythm of texting, she rises, her bag in hand. "Raina is at some party in Welch. Are you coming?" She looks up at him expectantly.
"Don't you have a strict no parties policy this semester?"
"I did. But tonight is an exemption."
"Okay."
They stop by Blair's dorm first so she can drop off her books and get visual confirmation that Georgina is really gone. After a quick survey and nod of approval, they take off for the party.
Once inside the stuffy dorm room, Blair does a quick succession of vodka shots that both alarms and amuses Dan. He does two and winces. "Feel better?"
"Much." She glows. As the alcohol kicks in, Raina and Blair proceed to have a long conversation about Georgina's departure and all the great uses for the extra space in the dorm.
"Hey, Dan." Epperly nods at Dan. "How was the rest of your break?"
"Dull, yours?"
"Same." She shrugs. "By the way, did I say hi to you on New Year's Eve? I feel like we talked at some point but it's all such a blur."
"We talked." Dan chuckles. He doesn't want to remind Epperly but he's frankly a little relieved she doesn't remember all her less-than-subtle attempts to encourage him making a move on Blair. It's possible she's somewhat responsible for him realizing his feelings.
"Oh, cool. Well, I'm glad we caught up before I got tanked this time. By the way, Blair seems headed that route." Epperly smirks, watching Blair do another shot.
"That cannot be good. I don't think she even ate dinner. We've been together since 3…" Dan looks at Epperly.
"I'll intervene." Epperly says confidently. She hooks her arm through Blair's and leads her toward the kitchen. He watches Blair sway slightly and then glances down at his phone.
Their eyes meet as she glances back at him with a mischievous grin. Abruptly, she breaks away from Epperly and heads straight for the row of bottles on the counter. Dan lets out a sigh, already predicting that Blair's no party policy is far from her mind.
Across the room, Epperly mouths "I tried", before downing another shot herself.
From there, the night blurs into an endless evening of making small talk with sophomore strangers and trying to keep Epperly and Blair from total alcohol annihilation.
When Blair wakes up, she's fairly certain she has suffered a serious trauma. It throbs more than she knew was possible and her mouth is so dry it somehow hurts. As she sits up she sees a glass of water sitting on her nightstand along with two pain relieving tables and a note, You might need these. Text me when you are awake. Oh and eat something, I think you haven't eaten since lunchtime yesterday. -Dan (and Epperly)
Epperly's hastily tacked-on handwriting is so messy that she knows she must have been equally drunk.
Blair takes the tablets, chugs the water, and then slowly climbs out of bed. She finds a granola bar on her desk and unwraps it, feeling simultaneously more nauseous and less weak.
It's not until she sees the empty bed across the room that she remembers why she drank herself into oblivion last night. Finding her phone, she texts Dan, Thank you for making sure I got home okay. Epperly did too?
As she sends it, she fights off an odd twinge of envy at the thought of Dan walking Epperly home. An image of them kissing crosses her mind and she quickly blames it on the hangover. Climbing back into bed, she falls asleep and lets her dreams erase the unpleasant imagery.
When she wakes up again, she has two unread texts. One from Dan and one from Epperly.
You alive? Thank God for Dan walking us both home. He also saved me from a detour to Wally's to declare my undying love :0
She mostly did, with some detours along the way. She tried to throw rocks at some guy named Waldo's window because she thought it was romantic and to 'Carpe diem'. Coffee?
Blair replies to Dan first:
Wally not Waldo. And yes please. 15 minutes?
Texting Epperly she says:
Did Dan leave you with water and Tylenol too?
Her reply is instant:
No :| I forgive him, I guess
She feels a tiny flicker of pleasure at that and then feels bad. He probably just didn't want to rummage through her dorm.
Dan ends up bringing the coffee to Blair's dorm as it takes her longer than expected to hide her hangover with multiple layers of moisturizer and foundation. When she opens her dorm room door, he's bearing more than coffee.
"Hi, croissant?" Dan walks in and hands her a coffee and paper bag.
"My hero." Blair takes it graciously and sinks down on her bed. Dan takes a seat on Georgina's empty bed.
"Have you decided yet what you're going to do with all this empty space?" Unlike Blair, he looks like he's had a full eight hours of sleep and there are no traces of a hangover. "You could easily see if the RA can arrange to clear the bed out."
"How are you so alert right now?" Blair sips her coffee. "I am seriously never drinking again."
Dan laughs. "Or at least never doing shots again?"
She nods. "So what are you doing today? I'll be making up for missed study hours for the foreseeable future."
"It was one night. How much could you have missed?"
Blair lets out a sigh. "It's different for you. You don't have strict GPA guidelines hanging over your head."
Dan nods. "That's true." He pauses. "Can I help you catch up on studying?"
Blair's face brightens as she passes him a stack of notecards. "Sure, quiz me. I hope your latin pronunciation isn't barbaric."
"Suus 'non."
Blair gives him an impressed glance but then he smirks. "Saw that written on your flashcard but worked to prove my point."
"Thank you." Blair says gratefully. The immense pressure she feels to keep her grades up is so much to bear on her own and not something she can vocalize to her mother without worrying her. Maybe, just maybe, she's finally found someone she can confide in.
Ignoring the shadows of Georgina lurking all around where Dan sits, she wills the words charity case out of her mind.
Best friend seems like a good replacement.
"Anytime." He smiles back.
Blair has a full dorm room again, at least for the evening. Epperly and Raina sit on what was formerly Georgina's bed. Nelly Yuki is beside Blair on hers, focused on studying unlike the rest of the girls.
"So any update on the Wally front?" Blair asks, filing her nails with Raina's neon buffing block.
"Sort of," Epperly sports a Cheshire-cat smile. "He asked me to come over tomorrow night to hang."
"To hang?" Raina repeats, nose wrinkled.
Blair laughs. "Well, at least that's something."
Epperly nods. "I think. I mean, his roommate Colin will probably be there but it's a start."
"Wally?" Nelly asks, belatedly.
"Epperly's been in love with him since the first day of the fall semester."
Nelly nods, knowingly. "I have one of those."
Blair quirks a brow. "His name is Todd," Nelly continues. "He doesn't know I exist."
"Aw," Epperly goes all doe-eyed. "Well, let's do something about that!"
"I don't think so." Nelly looks back down at her textbook. "He listens to Flo Rida and is definitely cooler to me. He probably would get in the way of my studies."
Blair gives Epperly a shrug that says, You tried.
"What about you, Blair?" Nelly looks back up. "What's happening with you and Dan?"
Epperly and Raina exchange a knowing look that makes Blair uneasy before turning their laser-like gazes on her. "Yes, Blair, what is happening with you and Dan?"
Blair pretends not to notice their insinuations and interest. "He helped me study yesterday and then we grabbed coffee. Really dull, I know. Should we get back to discussing something other than guys? A dorm room conversation about boys is a bit trite."
"Whatever," Epperly says breezily. "I've got an idea. Since you and Dan are clearly just friends and have zero interest in dating, why don't you come over to Wally's with me tomorrow? You can entertain Colin while I 'hang' with Wally."
"Entertain him?" Blair echoes.
"You make it sound like she should give him a lap dance or something." Raina laughs so hard that she has to latch onto a pillow.
"Stop!" Epperly says giggling. "You both know what I mean. Nelly, don't you?"
"Yes," Nelly replies unamused and seemingly slightly irked to be disturbed again. "You want her to be your wingwoman."
"See," Epperly agrees. "You'd be helping a friend."
"I've never even met Colin." Blair says quickly, not liking this idea at all. "That sounds really uncomfortable."
"Come on, college is supposed to be a little uncomfortable." Epperly pleads. "How else do you make memories?"
"By not putting myself in precarious situations." Blair drops the buffing block and picks up a bottle of base coat.
"It might make Dan jealous." Nelly cuts in.
"I have zero interest or reason to make Dan jealous." Blair huffs in annoyance. Her solar plexus keeps flurrying with a buzzing sensation each time Dan's name comes up. "Can't Raina go instead?"
Raina shakes her head. "I have a Skype date."
Blair rolls her eyes, knowing exactly who that Skype date is with.
"If it helps motivate you, Dan might be dating too." Nelly shuts her book, clearly having given up on studying. "There's this blonde girl, Eva, in French class that is always flirting with him. Although, I'm not sure he's noticed. His French is terrible, she's practically seducing him with her advances at this point but they keep getting lost in translation."
A cold shiver sweeps over Blair and causes her to accidentally drop the polish. It lands on her duvet and she tries to pick it up before the girls notice. When she glances up at her friends, she can tell playing it nonchalant is going to be a bit tricky. "Oh, that sounds… romantic I guess."
"Exactly." Nelly nods fervently. "If I were you, I would go on the date."
"It's not exactly a date." Epperly cuts in. "Although, it could be."
Blair lets out a breath. "This has all been a lot to take in. Not that it has upset me," She adds when noting the alarms on the other girls' faces. "Epperly, can I let you know tomorrow?"
"Sure." She smiles. "No pressure, thanks for considering it."
"And Nelly?" Blair asks. "Maybe you could try sitting next to Dan? You know to help him improve his French and if that means stealing Eva's seat, no big deal, right?"
Nelly smiles, looking pleased to be in on a plot. "Right."
Raina looks across at Blair with a sensible smile and nods approvingly.
"By the way," Nelly says. "We all totally failed the Bechdel test tonight."
"That's okay." Epperly grins. "I always tell Blair her life is a romantic comedy and those always fail that test."
TBD...
Continuing on from my message above, I took a break from writing recently so I have quite a bit to catch up on but I am going to try my best to get this story updated soon. Thank you so much for continuing to read, your support means a lot!