Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter and I do not plan to make money off my stories.

"Hmmmm," said Xenophilius, frowning as he looked around the sitting room.

"Is something wrong, dear?" asked Pandora as she came up from the kitchen.

"I could have sworn my Kroogbear model was sitting right there," her husband replied, gesturing toward the coffee table. "It appears Nargle season has arrived earlier than usual. I will have to mention that at the meeting tonight."

"What meeting?" demanded Pandora suspiciously.

"Oh, Dora, I forgot to tell you two of my writers have requested a meeting in London this evening to discuss next month's Quibbler issue."

"You forgot - really, Xenophilius, you'd forget your head if it wasn't attached to your shoulders!" exclaimed Pandora angrily. "I've got a dinner party to attend tonight! Who's going to look after Luna?!"

"The Diggorys?" Xeno suggested.

"Not the Diggorys, Xeno! Cedric is still grounded, remember?"

"Bill and Charlie Weasley, then."

"Good idea. Luckily for you they're not due to return to Hogwarts for three more days." Pandora hurried over to the fireplace.

At the Burrow, Fred was standing on the sofa of the sitting room, holding Ron's Chudley Cannons figurine out of the six-year-old's reach. "Fred, you gimme back my Cannons toy!" he yelled.

"Say 'please.'"

"Gimme my toy!"

"Say 'pretty please,'" George chimed in.

"Gimme my toy!"

"Say 'pretty please with cherries on top,'" said Fred.

"Gimme my toy!"

"Say 'Fred and George are the best brothers ever and I'm a dirty, smelly gnome,'" said George.

"GIMME MY TOY! GIMME GIMME GIMME!" screamed Ron, stamping his feet angrily.

"Fine, if you're not gonna be nice about it...Forge, what do you say we give this to the ghoul in the attic?"

"You read my mind, Gred." Ron burst into tears and ran from the room calling for his mother, and the twins were just about to set off for the attic when a voice called, "Hello?"

They turned to the fireplace to find Pandora Lovegood's head resting there. "Will you two go and fetch Bill and Charlie? I need to have a word with them," she said.

"BIIIIIIIIILLLLLLLL! CHAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRLLLLLLLLIIIIIIIE!" both boys shouted up the stairs; a minute later the two eldest Weasley boys came hurrying down.

"Boys," Pandora told them, "I have a favor to ask you..."

"Luna!" Bill called. "Hey, Luna, where are you? It's time to get washed up for supper!" There was no answer.

"Luna!" called Charlie. "Come out, come out wherever you are!" The two boys went down to the kitchen - and found the five-year-old standing on a chair in front of the counter and reaching for the jar of chocolate-frosted Dirigible Plum biscuits her mother had baked that afternoon.

"Stop right there, young lady!" said Bill sternly. "No biscuits till after supper."

"Can't I have just one?" Luna begged.

"No, Luna."

"Pleeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaase?" The little girl stared up at Bill, giving him her best puppy-dog face with those huge, protuberant eyes.

"C'mon Bill," said Charlie, "don't break the poor little girl's heart! Just one biscuit can't hurt."

"Charlie, Mrs. Lovegood told us specifically not to let Luna have any biscuits before supper, and we can't have a repeat of last time. The answer is no."

Luna continued to stare up at the boys with her puppy-dog eyes for a few seconds longer; then, to their surprise, smiled and said, "Okay." Then, without warning, she climbed up on the kitchen table and said, "Guess what I am?" She then made an odd sound, a cross between a crow, an elephantlike trumpeting sound, and a bark.

"Luna, get off the table," Bill ordered.

"First you have to guess what I am." She made the strange sound again.

"A Chinese Fireball?" guessed Charlie.

"No!"

"A Crup with its tail stuck under a rock?" guessed Bill.

"No!"

"Well then, what are you?" asked Charlie.

"A Crumple-Horned Snorkack, of course!" replied Luna as though it were the most obvious thing in the world. "That's the sound they make; Daddy told me." She jumped off the table and asked, "What's for supper?"

Later, while Luna was happily spinning in circles in front of her bed, Bill was flipping through the pages of a Muggle storybook, trying to decide which story to read to her (the little girl had requested a story from said book because she wanted to hear one she hadn't already heard before).

"Why don't you read her a story with animals in it?" suggested Charlie. "We both know how much she loves animals." Bill nodded, then turned to Luna as she toppled over on her stomach, giggling.

"How about Goldilocks and the Three Bears?"

"I've heard that one before."

"The Little Red Hen?"

"I've heard that one too."

"Puss in Boots?"

"Mummy's read that to me three times already. I even tried to put Daddy's Wellington boots on Newt once. He didn't like that very much."

"Okay then, what about the Three Little Pigs?"

"Oooooh, I haven't heard that one yet!" said Luna happily, jumping into bed. "I wanna hear that one!"

"Hey, Bill, why don't you and I take turns reading the story?" Charlie suggested. "You can be the narrator and the pigs, and I'll do the wolf's voice."

Bill snickered. "Are you kidding?! You, voicing the wolf with your cracking voice?!" Then, using his best imitation of Charlie's voice, he said, "HeLlO, i'M a bIg BaD wOlf aNd I LOve To eAt heLPlEss lITtLe PigS!" This sent Luna into a fit of high-pitched giggles.

"Oh, shut it, you!" Charlie said in mock anger. Turning to Bill he added, "Oh, all right, point taken. You be the wolf; I'll do the voices of the pigs."

"Right then," said Bill. "Once upon a time there were three little pigs who lived with their mother. One day she sent them out into the world to seek their fortune..." The storytelling went quite smoothly until he got to the part where the wolf arrived at the first pig's house of straw.

"'Little pig, little pig, let me in,'" read Bill.

"'Not by the hair on my chinny-chin-chin!'" read Charlie. Luna suddenly gave a scream of mirth, rocking back and forth in her bed, clutching her sides. "Chinny...chin...chin!" she blurted out between giggles. Several minutes went by before the little girl's laughter died down and Bill could continue the story.

"'Then I'll huff and I'll puff and I'll bloooooooooow your house in!'" growled Bill. "And so he huffed and puffed and blew that straw house in, and the first little pig ran as fast as he could to the second pig's house of sticks." Before Bill could continue, the sound of the front door opening reached everyone's ears, followed by Pandora's voice, "I'm home!"

"Mummy!" Luna shrieked, running down the stairs, Bill and Charlie hurrying to keep up.

"How did everything go?" the witch asked the boys. "Any problems?"

"No, but watch this," replied Bill, grinning; he turned to Luna. "Chinny-chin-chin." The little girl fell over laughing hysterically, her silver eyes swimming in tears.

Pandora smiled. "Let me guess - you read her the story of the Three Little Pigs." Bill nodded.

"Well, I guess we should get going," the teenage boy said. "C'mon, Charlie." After the boys had left, Luna asked, "Mummy, Bill and Charlie didn't get to finish the story before you came home. Will you read the rest of it to me, please?"

"Of course I will," Pandora replied as they headed up to Luna's room, and by the time Xenophilius had returned from his meeting, Pandora had finished the story and Luna was asleep.