Time Scale: Nano-click: second ; Cycle: Minute ; Groon: an hour ; Mega-cycle: days ; Orn: 13 days ; Steller Cycle: year ; Vorn: 83 year

Chapter 32: The Confrontation

Ratchet sat at the counter, slowly tweeking the tools he could … dwelling on the night's events.

He had spark overloaded Breakdown multiple times with his hands. Even when the blue mech had been all but weeping in exhausted pleasure, he had persisted if only for Sentinel's sake. Finally, the poor mech had passed out, his body not used to the stress of overloading. For a few kliks Ratchet had considered to keep going, collecting more donations, but refrained. True, Breakdown still had a miasma around his spark, but nowhere near so dense. Plus … Ratchet felt it best to clean the poor mech up. He could see the transfluid and lube just dripping from behind the blue mech's cod piece.

Nothing to be embarrassed about. Even mechs that gave a single spark-flux donation could physically come. He was sure Breakdown's interfacing systems had held out until the third spark overload and then could take no more. Ratchet found it best not embarrass the larger mech unnecessary and said nothing.

So, once he was sure the mech was out, he had taken off his cod piece and cleaned him up. A nice healthy slightly modded spike and a tight underused valve had been below, dripping in fluids.

Ratchet would be lying if he hadn't been slightly aroused. It … had been too long for him as well. Not that he would probably be single much longer.

Once he got his fake bond documents to go through for Sari and Reboot he knew that the medical services would start throwing single parent mechs and femmes at him. Given most sparklings needed a second parent spark to be stable, he likely would have to beat off a few mechs. Sari, being Allspark created, didn't need any support. Reboot … he didn't know yet. He honestly didn't know if the poor thing was little more than a drone at this point.

Nonetheless, if he kept busy, he probably could keep out of the match makers clutches until Sari was considered old enough to be stable, thus not needing a second parent.

Honestly, the program was part of the reason Ratchet had taken Sari instead of making Optimus adopt her. The kid was too young to be bonding with anybot willy-nilly. Plus, he wasn't crafty enough to lead mechs or femmes on for vorns to come. Ratchet … he was fraggen old. He knew how to bide his time.

Sighing at the coming struggle, knowing that he could at least allow himself to be fragged a few times because it really had been too long, he placed another tool down. He had been cleaning and repairing the tools he could in Breakdown's collection. After all, he had just finished giving Sentinel Minor Breakdown's spark-flux donations and … given the mini-overload's Sentinel had experienced, it likely had reset his system.

Well, at least there were no nanites or lube to clean up off of Sentinel. He also didn't see any valve scarring when he had checked. What happened that night nearly two vorns ago? Was it a rape? Was it semi-consensual? What the frag had happened? He wanted to know so badly and yet … he didn't want to know at all. Blessed are the ignorant as the saying went.

He loved that young-bot. He loved Optimus so much. The kid was basically his creation. All of them really … even Bumblebee. As painful as that was to admit. He'd offline to protect any of those young-bots. He was old, after all, even with his recent system upgrades which gave him a semblance of youth. The world had given him his time. If he could, he would take the fall for this. Optimus still had a whole life. He deserved it.

Then again, what of Sari and Reboot?

Sighing, Ratchet stared at a tool he had been scrubbing for at least half a groon. He couldn't concentrate or think. He needed Sentinel to wake up. He needed to yell at that big chinned idiot. He wanted to shake him! He wanted to ask him over and over again why he hadn't asked for help on Earth. Why hadn't he broken down and wept if it was rape that had left him so afraid? Why?!

Frag! Why was the world so hard? He had become an old mech where more deserving and kind mechs had bled out on the battlefield.

He didn't want the weight of Sentinel's secrets, but who else would bear them?

Sighing, the old mech wondering if he should transform and take a nap in his alt mode, he stared at his hands. How dirty they felt with all the blood and fluids that had once covered them over the vorns. On Earth, he hadn't been able to see those invisible stains. He had rather enjoyed Earth in some ways, the heat of the sun warming his old joints and the rain pattering down his frame. It seemed to wash everything away. It was a world of change and life. Alive in a way Cybertron no longer felt.

Frag. These thoughts would drive him mad! Finally, as if listening to his silent plea. There was a twitch from the berth. Quickly looking up, Ratchet held his venting as he watched Sentinel come online.

There was a moment of stillness, as if the world was trying to decide its next course of action, as if the fates were trying to make up Sentinel's mind for him. Then, shocking poor Ratchet with his speed, Sentinel was scrambling off the berth, nearly collapsing into the adjoining wall. There was a crash as the blue mech quickly fell to the floor, though, his legs unable to hold him.

So … the time had come … for the painful confrontation.

Systems now panting in a panic, blue optics searched the room in a frenzy, Sentinel was seemingly stuck in his earlier panic from when he had ended up on the clinic's doorstep. There was another moment of stillness, Ratchet trying not to twitch a cable as Sentinel Minor observed him. Surprisingly, it was Sentinel that spoke first for which Ratchet was glad. His own tongue felt so heavy.

"W-where is he? Where is he?"

There was no real question as to who he was asking about. Ratchet knew. He didn't want to answer. He didn't want to confront the past today, but he also saw no point in dragging it out. He didn't want to allow this to burden Sentinel for another two vorns. Today he would have the truth. No matter how much it hurt. If he could, he would accept the punishment for all of this. He had lived a long life. He … could always give Sari and Reboot to somemech else. He wanted Sari and Reboot. He really did, now that he all but had them, but the world is what it is. There are somethings you can fight and there are other things you merely accept.

"If you are talking about Echo, Sentinel Minor, he is recharging peacefully in the other exam room."

Sentinel looked at the door like a frightened animal. He looked ready to bolt, but Ratchet's next words seem to staple him to the floor.

"Though, I ask that you don't go to him quite yet. We are going to have a conversation about his … creation … and I would rather not have it over his berthside. One doesn't just leave a sire's name off of a sparkling's file for no reason," said Ratchet, his voice even. He had been dreading this conversation, but now that it was before him he found the words coming easily. He was angry at the Minor. He should have said something! He should have said something ages ago. It would have hurt less. The wound might have healed right, but now it was infect and sour.

Swallowing, Sentinel seemed to be looking for something to say, his mouth opening several times only to close. He was lost for words, for a voice.

It seemed that Ratchet would have to speak for both of them.

Sighing, Ratchet eyed the blue mech for a moment, a scan falling over the Minor. Sentinel twitched, but merely looked away as he swallowed heavily. He looked near tears. Not that Ratchet blamed him. The big mech would probably rather take an acid pelt to the back of the throat then talk about this, but the time for hiding was done.

"How about you have a seat Sentinel? It must be uncomfortable on the floor," said Ratchet as he patted a hand on the berth.

When the blue mech refused to move, Ratchet took up a stern tone he only used for youngling's. Compared to him, Sentinel was nothing but a young thing. "We are having this conversation, Sentinel Minor. You can either tell me the truth from the floor or you can look me in the optic. Now, I would rather it be optic to optic myself."

Vents catching, Sentinel swallowed and then almost painfully slowly he stood up and sat on the berth. Sentinel's first words were obviously trying to drag the medic away from the question at hand. "What are you doing here?"

Ratchet, if only to distract his hands, started to continue his earlier cleaning. His words almost bitter, "Saving you … and your creation."

Sentinel twitched, his optics offlining and onlining, his vocals glitching before he was able to murmur. "We didn't ask for your help."

"Well you fraggen should have!" snapped Ratchet. "How long, Sentinel? How long have you harbored this alone? How long did you think you could?"

The blue mech looked at him as if he was insulted, his mouth opening as if he was about to defend his decisions, but Ratchet beat him to the punch. "I'll tell you how long … until your spark finally gave out, and you and that sparkling of yours both offlined. That's when! A youngling that age can't survive on his own, especially not without both of his parents."

Sentinel … looked away.

Nonetheless, Ratchet had to continue.

"… Part of me wants to ask who the other parent is, but I know. I know so well that it hurts this old medic's spark," continued Ratchet, his vocals cracking as clenser started to gather in his own optics. "What I should ask, what I should have demanded long ago, was an explanation … an explanation of what happened that night in the sewers, on Earth with Soundwave."

Ratchet's next arguments bit, burned, and ripped at Sentinel's spark as if the old medic was peering right into his very being. And yet, as much as the words dug into him, Sentinel couldn't help but reel back in surprise when he noticed that Ratchet was wiping at his own optics. Huh? He had started to cry as well, hadn't he? He … he couldn't even open his mouth. He … this … this wasn't really happening, was it? Had … had Ratchet always known or at least suspected?

"… Was it … Was it at least consensual? I know you used to be friends … I … need to know."

The blue Prime sat there, the whole thing feeling surreal. After all this time, hiding that night like a nightmare never to be forgotten, somebot seemed to know the whole time what had happened. Someone else had known, or at least suspected, his greatest shame. He knew, without a doubt, that no matter how much the repair bot loved Optimus, Ratchet would accept what Sentinel said without question … without rebut.

A dark part of Sentinel, a part of him that was smothered and silenced by his parental duties and love, rose to the surface. It was sneering and laughing. Oh, how it wanted to hurt Optimus. How it wanted to point Sentinel's finger and claim Optimus hurt him, groaning like a bull while Sentinel wailed in agony from painful impregnation. He wanted to scream rape. He wanted to point at Optimus and call him a monster, having his title stripped and his Autobot brand as well.

Yet … he could not.

It haunted him, but a part of his mind never forgot that Optimus had made love to him. Optimus had kissed him and soothed him as his thickness penetrated his tight heat, his mind tricked into thinking it was consensual. He would never forget how Optimus had cried out his name or how gentle the rock of his hips had been. If … If Elita hadn't passed, that was how he would have liked it to have been, the taking of his valve.

Swallowing, the words heavy on his tongue as if they weighed a ton, an admittance to himself as much as Ratchet, the words finally escaped the blue Prime. They were so soft. It was almost as if he was telling a secret. "We … we were both Soundwave's victims that night. Optimus is merely the lucky one to have never remembered. He … is Echo's sire. S-soundwave forced us to couple, forced Optimus to make love to me. H-he … I … we both were wronged that night."

He then couldn't hold it together a moment longer, covering his face as he started to sob. There, he admitted it. He spoke those words for the first time to another bot. Optimus was the sire to Echo. They had coupled and came together that night. That night had happened. It had happened and it hurt twice as much for him because he had no one to blame anymore. Soundwave was offline. He had done the deed himself. He had beaten the Decepticon's CPU into the cement, and yet he never took any comfort in the fact. And Optimus … Optimus was a victim as well. He had his fucking mind raped and in some strange way had been raped as well. Sentinel wanted to hate him though, mostly, because Optimus didn't have to remember.

He would never have to recall.

He would never be haunted by that night's events.

He suffered no pains afterwards.

"B-but he's mine," said Sentinel as he removed his hands for his face, his arms now shaking as he slowly started to become hysterical. "He's mine. I raised him all alone. I birthed him all alone. Echo's mine. Mine. Mine!"

Ratchet watched as Sentinel couldn't hold it together anymore. It was just one sob first and then he was all but bawling. Ratchet, who was already stunned, could barely speak when Sentinel was to his feet, shaking the old mech as he begged, "Please! This can't leave this room. Don't let Optimus know. He can't take Echo away. He's mine! He's the only thing that has ever loved me. Please! I will leave and never come back. No one needs to know about what happened on Earth. J-just let me keep him. Please."

The blue mech was all but sobbing, cleaner falling down his cheeks. He was terrified. He couldn't even imagine losing Echo, and yet he was acting like Ratchet was ripping the sparkling from his arms. Not that Ratchet would ever do that. For one, Echo was too small to be taken away from his alma, too dependent. And for another, if a couple had to be separated for any time, it was always recommended the sparkling stay with the carrier for that time. Yet, that was the magic word, for a time. Even if a sparkling was an accident, the coupled pairing would stick together until the sparkling's spark was more self-sufficient. Optimus had been suffering the after effects for a while now with the spark aches.

It was time for a nasty truth.

Nonetheless, Ratchet leaned over on his stool and pulled the younger mech's helm into an awkward embrace, trying to shush him as he petted the back of his helm. If anything, Sentinel was now crying harder, Ratchet's lap was even starting to feel wet. That didn't cause the old mech to pull away, though. He knew he was grouchy and rough around the edges, but he still wouldn't be a healer if he didn't care about other mechs. He might not have the warmest berthside manner, but he would comfort those he could. And so, he spoke calmly and reassuringly to the terrified alma, promising he wouldn't take Echo from him. He told him he had no plans to take a sparkling from his carrier.

It took nearly half a groon, but slowly Sentinel started to calm down. Thus, Ratchet saw no point in holding back any longer.

Once he had gotten Sentinel back onto the berth and venting somewhat regularly, he placed a hand on the blue mech's shoulder. Ratchet's words were soft and so painful he could feel the blue mech twitch under his touch. He knew his words probably hurt as much as being shot, but Ratchet had made a decision … he felt it was for the best of everyone, especially little Echo.

"You are a good carrier, Sentinel," he said truthfully, for what kind of love and devotion did it take to cripple your own spark in such a way, "… but you are also a bad one. Scarring yourself like this. You could have offlined and then where would Echo be?"

Sentinel swallowed thickly, but couldn't look Ratchet in the optic. Then, Ratchet dropped the bomb, his words unyielding. "That alone is why Echo needs his other parent around. It will keep him, and you it seems, alive. You need to tell Optimus about this soon Sentinel, about his son, … or I will."

And with those words, Ratchet left the room, closing the door softly behind him. He tried not to listen to the soft sobs that echoed in the clinic afterwards. He refused to feel guilty for his decision … for the world was always full of hard choices. And allowing Sentinel and Echo to offline seemed a harder choice than telling the truth.

XXX

Paw07: This chapter was so very hard to write. It's such an important conversation. It really is … especially because I don't want you all to think of Ratchet as the bad guy. He … is just doing what he thinks is best. That doesn't always mean everyone will agree, but so is life. And Optimus, though I know some readers don't agree, I've never seen him as anything but another victim.