"What's that noise?" Vision asked Eva, as she switched the phone over to another ear.
"Tattoo needle," she told him, "it's been a while. I'm getting a lady drinking a cup of tea on my hip – ahh that one hurt. I thought, hey, it's on a fleshy bit! It won't be so bad. I forgot about stretch marks. Never get a tattoo on stretch marks, V. It hurts like a bitch."
"I shall bear that in mind," he replied, and she could hear the smile in his voice. "Please do send me a photo when it's finished."
"Will do. Stark took me to the Botanical Gardens a couple weeks back. Am I right in thinking you were the angel on his shoulder when it came to that decision?"
"I don't know what you're talking about," Vision said smoothly. "How is he?"
"Alright, I think. He misses you. All of y'all, actually. He's all but adopted Spider-Man just to keep himself busy. But yeah, a solid alright. More green smoothies than straight vodka, these days."
"Good. And you?"
"You know how I feel about hipster drinks," she said, wincing as the needle ran across another tender spot.
"That's not what I meant."
"I know," she sighed. "I'm alright. I don't have any friends left around to drink with, anyway, what with you all abandoning me."
"For which I feel immeasurably guilty, of course. At least you still have Rachel Carson."
"She threw up in my favorite pair of sneakers last week," Eva said. "Stop laughing!"
"Sorry. Were they salvageable?"
"Yeah, but it was not an experience I enjoyed. When is everyone gonna make up, anyway? Not that I enjoyed being surrounded by super people, but it was better than y'all not talking to each other. You know who I miss? Thor. Thor was great. When Thor gets back he's going to think all of this is ridiculous. I mean, his brother tried to kill him loads of times and the last time I saw them they still seemed to be getting along pretty well. Meanwhile, Rogers decides that the best way to respond to a political problem that arose from wanting to protect people is to throw a massive strop and disappear off the face of the earth."
"I've always enjoyed your unique take on these things," Vision said cheerfully. "You should write a book."
"I can't spell, V."
"Then I shall be your scribe."
"Thanks," she said, and sighed as the tattoo artist stopped to wipe cooling gel over the raw skin on her hip. "Did you get the photos I sent you?"
"I did!" She had mailed him some photos of the now-completed grounds of the Wakandan Outreach Program's new high school in Harlem. "You really are getting very good at landscaping."
"I tried to use lots of shrubs that originated from that bit of Africa," she told him. "It's tough finding stuff from there that'll survive New York winters, but I got some in the end. I got sent a load of vibranium sculptures so I worked them into the landscape like I did with the graffiti back when I helped with the HOPE gardens."
"I remember," Vision replied. "I hope I get to see it soon."
"Me too – WAS THAT A PUN?!" Eva yelled, and the tattoo artist flinched. Thank God the needle was nowhere near her skin just then.
"Possibly."
"You are the worst!" she grinned. "If you were here you would totally get hit for that."
"I shall get Wanda to do it for you."
"Thanks."
A/N less than a week til Infinity War you guys, oh my life. Has anyone else seen that clip that was on GMA, I think, with (spoilers a bit) Shuri and Bruce? I am LIVING for Vision's side-eye in that scene. Also, a fun fact: the tattoo Eva is getting in this one is actually identical to one of mine. I'll post a photo of it on my ko-fi sometime soon. For real, though. Tattoos on stretch marks are not a good idea.