He held his jaw as he watched her walk away, her back was rammrod straight. If Summer's God was real, and if his hell was a real place, then this act would push him to the front of the line. The things he had said earlier had been designed to play on every insecurity that Payson had, and he knew them all so well, it had been easy to do.

She didnt exactly fit in with her peers, so being a teenage girl she naturally thought them more mature than her. Instead she was simply years beyond them in every way. She viewed people like Summer, Kaylie or Lauren as her exact opposite, she thought that guys only liked girls like them. In her mind she was an athlete first and a woman last. She could never process the male attention she captured effortlessly, just by walking into a room. She was still so unaware of her true femininity, and the power she already held over men. It was sad really, that she couldnt see herself the way he saw her. Unbelievable, that she was unaware of her absolute perfection in his eyes.

He didnt know if he would ever recover from this night, but she would. The fire in her eyes right before she hit him, indicated that she would find a way to get past this, and that was all that mattered.

Payson stumbled blindly back into the Tanner residence, she found Kelly next to the back door. She motioned to the front door and Kelly nodded. She was glad they had been so late because her car wasnt blocked by anyone elses. The ride home was a silent one. Glaring at the road, she forced herself to hold back the tears. Keeping her mind blank was the only thing holding her swirling emotions at bay, refusing to allow them to fully form. She knew that if she felt anything, then she would have to feel everything and she couldn't handle that at all. A detatched numbness began to fill the growing void. She didnt even acknowledge Kelly when she said goodbye and went to her car instead of spending the night like they had agreed upon earlier.

Finally alone inside her room, Payson shut the door and leaned up against it with her eyes closed. She clung fiercely to her anger. Anger was safe, anger could be managed. He (she wouldn't even allow herself to think his name) had been cruel and petty. That was his m.o. If something made him feel to much he pulled away from it completly. He was the child, and an emotionally stunted one at that.

She realized that she was angry at herself as well. She had begun to believe, this story had a happy ending. Even though her logical mind knew how the real world worked, even after he told her it was over. She had believed he wanted her, that he wanted this. After his conflicting words and actions in the trailer, against all rationality, she had let herself hope, that one day... maybe...after the Olympics, there would be... more. She knew it would be impossible before then, but maybe afterwards, when it was all over, they would have a chance at something real. The feelings were there, the timing and circumstances were just wrong.

His actions tonight, disabused her of any happily ever after the Olympics notions she might have held. She had been silly and naive, and he had been cold and callous. There would be no happily ever after for them, not walking off into the sunset. Their minute was over. Fury outweighed the sadness that thought brought with it.

She opened her eyes, secure in her anger at him, only to have them fall on a gold medal hanging on a faded red ribbion. Just like that the soul crushing pain washed over her so quickly that it stole her very breath. Unbidden, the first tear fell. It was swiftly followed by many others and two seconds later she collapsed onto the floor in a heap of tears. It was a searing pain, a deep ache. She longed for the numbness she had felt on the ride home. She searched fruitlessly for the anger she had felt only moments ago, but all she could feel was the pain and a deep and abiding sense of loss. They had come so close, only to have him rip it away. The unfairness of it all only amplified the pain. She lay on the floor in front of her door and wept for all of the things that would never be, she wept for what she'd almost had.

Kelly shifted from foot to foot as she stood outside of the front door. She had been a bitch to Austin earlier, when he had done nothing to deserve it. Glancing at his motorcycle nervously, she cursed under her breath. She had hoped she would beat him home, and hide in her room, thereby putting this confrontation off until tomorrow at the earliest. Judging by the fact that his motorcycle was here and the lights were on, she was going to have to face him sooner rather than later. Bracing herself for what awaited her on the other side of the door she entered.

The downstairs lights were on but the house was silent. When she saw the light off in Austin's room she breathed out a sigh of relief. She'd dodged that bullet, at least for tonight. Breakfast would most likely be uncomfortable though. Deciding at the last minute not to go to her room, she headed instead to the library. It was quickly becoming her favorite place in the house.

She'd found out that his interior designer had chosen most of the books; the selection was quite varied as a result. There were of course the standard encyclopedias, dictionaries and thesauruses, found in all libraries along with a surprising number of comic books and cookbooks. He also had all of Shakespeares works and leatherbound copies of almost all the modern classics. He had a requisite sports section complete with autobiographies of legendary sports figures, including Sasha Belov.

It was on the second day that she found the true crime section, hidden at the bottom corner of the third shelf. Strange though it may be, she had a facination with things of that nature; an unyielding curiosity about the darker side of human nature. She didn't bother to turn on the overhead light. Instead she grabbed her book from the table where she had left it, turned on the reading lamp next to the couch in the sitting area and sat down.

"That book you're reading, it's a bit of a grim way to start off the new year. I have no idea what Nancy was thinking when she put it in here." A low voice murmured from the other side of the room.

"Jesus Christ!" She exclaimed her book fell onto the floor. "Why would you do that? Was it your goal to scare me to death?" She twisted the lamp head so that she could better make out his silohette. It was disconcerting talking to a disembodied voice.

"Seems to be a recurrng theme this evening or morning whatever." He leaned forward in the chair. In the darkness she had walked right past him. He placed his head in his hands and ran his fingers through his hair roughly. When he looked up she could see the weary lines etched into his face. Even though they had fought earlier, she knew that wasn't what put him in this state. He looked like someone had died.

"Austin," she said slowly, "What happ-"

He cut her off. "She left me."

It took her a moment to put the pieces together, "Kaylie?" She asked an incredulous edge to her voice.

He didnt respond but the didn't need too. "I thought everything was fine, I thought she was back. I thought we were back."

"I saw the two of you at midnight, you looked 'back' to me."

"Until I brought up the future and she shut down. I told her I could see myself with her forever."

Well that hurt more than it should, Kelly thought, but it was no less than she expected. In the time she had spent with him one thing was blatantly obvious, Austin Tucker was a good guy.

He continued. "She said it was to much to fast. She said she can't be with me because she isn't ready to seriously be with anyone again after Carter and the anorexia. She said she couldn't bear to lead me on, knowing that we want different things. Can you believe that? The first time I make a real commitment and she turned me down. Sad thing is I probably deserve it, for all the times I have done the same thing. I feel like such an idiot."

Kelly stood, crossed the room and perched on the arm of the chair where he was sitting. "You're not. She is." Placing both of her hands under his chin she brought his face level with hers. "We talked remember. You took a big step tonight and you should be proud. Just because she cant see what is in front of her, doesn't make you any less impressive. I mean look at me. I could still be sleeping on the floor in a shady apartment, but here I am with you. You took me in without a moments hesitation. That is a good guy." She looked at him dead in the eye. "You are a good guy."

Their faces were inches apart, and her heart was beating a mile a minute. His gaze was penetrating and for a moment he didn't say anything. How she wished they were sharing this moment under different circumstances, but if she hadn't accepted it before now, the previous conversation effectively crushed any budding romantic notions she had towards him. He loved Kaylie, he would wait for her.

"Thank you Kelly." He said before pulling away and leaning back into the chair.

"I fall; you catch. It's only fair that I return the favor." She got up and headed for the door.

"Kels?"

She turned around.

"That book you were reading earlier care to share?"

"Sure."

She went back over to the couch and picked it up off the floor to give to him.

"Would you mind reading it out loud? The other night when we were here and you were reading... I find your voice... you have a soothing voice."

And there it was again. That little tendril nestled deep in her chest, the emotion that she refused to name. It flared back to life as if it had never gone anywhere. "Yeah, I can do that."

So this is a short chapter. Sorry, but there is a Kelly/ Austin one shot going up right after this today, so check that out! Ch.15 should be up really soon it's almost done. It will be time to get back to the gymnastics and all the drama that comes with it.

As always please favorite follow and review.