Hope you guys are having a nice Thanksgiving in these times. Here, have a serving of slice-of-life.
Chapter 71 – Cooking Calamities (Red Wolf Moon)
A large group of the first-year students were gathered in the kitchen at Garreg Mach's dining hall, paired into teams of two for a small contest. Before each pair were a set of ingredients and a large pot with which to brew.
The event had been Annette's idea. The greenhouse had recently brought in a large harvest of Nordsalat, so the orange-haired girl had suggested that the students come together for a cooking competition to see who could make the best Charming Soup out of the harvest. However, Byleth had chosen to turn the activity into an exercise in teamwork by pairing students together for the contest. The pairings that had decided to join in were Dorothea and Bernadetta, Annette and Mercedes, Ingrid and Sylvain, Claude and Petra, Dedue and Ashe, Leonie and Lorenz, Hilda and Marianne, Constance and Ferdinand, and Balthus and Hapi. Byleth and Gilbert were both in the kitchen as well to ensure everything went fairly.
It had taken Byleth a bit to organize the event, but she knew it would go a long way in helping the students to relax and recover from their battle with the Umbral Beast. She had been disappointed when some of the students declined to participate, but she decided it was for the best; the kitchen likely would not accommodate all of them at once. Flayn had expressed an interest in the contest as well, but Seteth caught wind of it and convinced her not to participate. Byleth knew that was for the best; no one but Seteth could bring themselves to tell the girl her cooking was horrible.
"Alright, everyone," said Byleth. "You'll each have one hour to make your soups. Work together with your partner. Once you're all finished, bring your work out so the judges can each have a sample and decide on a winner."
"Is there a prize at stake?" asked Balthus. "I'd feel a lot more motivated by some gold."
"Baltie, are you serious?" Hilda said in exasperation.
"There's no material prize, but please do your best," said Byleth. "If you have any questions, please speak with me or Sir Gilbert."
"Alright then, let's get started!" Ashe said earnestly.
"This is gonna be so much fun!" Annette said with enthusiasm.
"Must I be forced to wear this unsightly garment?" Constance said as she gestured to her apron, which was quite dirty from repeated usage by the kitchen staff.
"Hey, it's better than getting anything on your dress, Coco," said Hapi.
"I agree with Constance on the matter," said Lorenz. "This smock is utterly dreadful."
"Oh, suck it up, Lorenz," said Leonie. "Come on, start peeling those veggies."
Lorenz was about to argue with Leonie on being given such a menial task, but Dorothea ignored him as she turned to Bernadetta. The purple-haired girl was shaking in her usual fright.
"Hey, Bern, you okay?" asked Dorothea.
"I… I don't want to do this!" Bernadetta squeaked. "I just can't, not today!"
"Bern, you've always been so up for cooking. What's going on?"
"Th-There's too many people around! I'm okay when it's just me and you, but with everyone else here… I can't cook with so many eyes watching me…!"
"Bern, you don't need to worry about that. We're all friends here. And hey, if you think them watching you is too distracting, I'll make sure their eyes are on me instead."
Dorothea winked as she finished and, in a move that made Bernadetta blush, the brunette reached for the hem of her undershirt and pulled it down a bit, exposing more of her tantalizing cleavage. It was a move that made Sylvain go wide-eyed as he stared at the singer, something which prompted Ingrid to stomp on his foot.
"OW! OW, INGRID!" Sylvain yelped.
"Stop letting your eyes wander, Sylvain," Ingrid said crossly. "And give me a hand with the turnip, would you?"
Ignoring the exchange between the two Blue Lions, Dorothea said, "Come on, Bern. You've taught me so much about cooking, but I can't do this alone. Please, help me out here."
"Oh, um… okay…" Bernadetta said nervously before taking a deep breath. "Come on, Bernie, you can do this…"
Bernadetta then went to work as she started measuring spices that the two would eventually add to their soup while Dorothea went to work chopping up the Nordsalat.
To the side, Byleth watched with a smile of pride as Dorothea and Bernadetta went to work.
"You show Miss Arnault a great deal of favor, Professor Eisner," said Gilbert.
"I won't deny it," said Byleth. "Dorothea's been through a lot. They all have."
"That much is true. We are all defined by our experiences."
Byleth nodded at this as she looked around at the students. Constance was ignoring Ferdinand's protests as she added more Noa Fruit to her cooking pot, claiming no dish could have too much sweetness. Balthus was trying to figure out how to explain what a 'pinch' meant for Hapi, who was worrying over adding too much or too little spice. Lorenz and Leonie had both stopped work on their pot, the two now squabbling over who had to cut up the vegetables. Hilda was complaining about having to do hard work while Marianne just stood and listened to the pinkette, so neither of them were making much progress. Claude was trying to explain an idiom he had said to Petra, who was totally confused with Claude's saying. Ashe and Dedue were cooperating with each other the best out of the group, each one skillfully chopping up vegetables and making good measurements of spices.
Byleth turned to look back at Dorothea and Bernadetta. The brunette was doing much better at chopping vegetables than she had done months ago, but she was still making quite a few mistakes, chopping some chunks of Nordsalat far too large.
Then, Dorothea let out a loud "OUCH!" as she accidentally cut her hand with her knife, which clattered to the floor as she dropped it.
Byleth immediately strode toward her as Bernadetta said, "Dorothea, are you okay?!"
Dorothea held her bleeding hand as she said, "Y-Yeah, it's not that bad."
Before Dorothea could do anything else, Byleth took Dorothea by the hand and began to channel a healing spell. The cut quickly sealed itself, leaving only some blood on Dorothea's hand as the singer looked at Byleth.
"Professor…"
"Feeling better now?" asked Byleth.
"Yes, thank you."
Just then, the others heard Sylvain make a yelp as he too cut his hand.
"Ow, stupid vegetable," said Sylvain. "Hey Professor, how about a little of that healing here too?"
Before Byleth could move, Ingrid said, "You did that on purpose, Sylvain!"
"What? What are you talking about?"
"Don't toy with Professor Eisner's generosity!"
"Me? Never! I wouldn't take advantage of her like that! Really, my hand just slipped!"
The others were not convinced by Sylvain's words.
Ingrid then let out a loud sigh as she said, "Fine, you big baby. Here."
The blonde then tore a strip of cloth from her apron and began to wrap it around Sylvain's bloodied hand. The redhead let out a grunt of pain as Ingrid pulled tightly on the improvised bandage.
"OW! Ingrid, not so– ACK!"
"As Leonie said, suck it up, Sylvain."
Byleth let out a frown of exasperation at this. She had been more than willing to heal Sylvain herself, even if he had cut himself on purpose.
The students went back to making their soups as the hour passed by. Byleth resumed watching the others, disappointed that some of them were making poor progress for various reasons. Constance's brew was starting to turn purple from having too much Noa Fruit in it, despite Ferdinand's continued protests, while Hilda and Marianne's soup barely looked like more than discolored water. Ingrid and Sylvain were only modestly better, as theirs actually looked edible. Leonie and Lorenz, thanks to their squabbling, had made about as much progress as Hilda and Marianne, and Byleth doubted they would ever finish.
Then, to everyone's alarm, they heard a very loud bubbling coming from Annette and Mercedes' pot. The pot was beginning to send out sparks violently.
"Uh oh…!" Annette said with a gulp.
"Annie, what's going on?" Mercedes asked in surprise.
"I don't know! All I did was add a bit of that crushed black pepper!"
Annette then gestured to a small bag filled with what looked like crushed black pebbles.
"That's not pepper!" Ashe shouted. "That's an ingredient used in making blasting powder!"
Everyone immediately knew what was going to happen next and ran for cover. Annette, too shocked by Ashe's words, could only let out a loud yelp as her pot exploded, filling the air with smoke and ash.
A series of loud coughs filled the kitchen as the explosion passed. Everyone was covered in soot as they emerged from hiding. The pot was now emptied of its contents, which had stuck to the ceiling.
Coughing, Dorothea said, "I-Is everyone okay?"
"I – I think so," said Leonie.
"Annie? Annie?!" Mercedes said fearfully.
Dorothea's heart sank for a moment. Annette had been the closest one to the blast.
But as the smoke cleared, they saw that Gilbert had put himself between Annette and the exploding pot. The orange-haired girl was unharmed as she looked up at her father, whose back was drenched with ruined soup.
"F-Father?" Annette said in concern.
Gilbert said nothing to this as he moved himself away from Annette, leaving the girl despondent at how uncaring her father seemed to be.
The veteran knight turned briefly to Byleth and said, "If you will excuse me." He then left in order to get himself cleaned off.
Byleth looked at Annette with concern, knowing the girl had to be hurting inside.
"Annie? Are you alright?" asked Mercedes as she wrapped her arms around the girl.
"Y-Yeah, I'm okay…" Annette replied before she looked up at the ceiling.
As if on cue, a small portion of the soup chose that moment to fall down and splat right on Annette's face, with another part landing in Mercedes' hair.
"Agh! Eww!" Annette yelped. Mercedes let out a similar sound of disgust at being soiled by their ruined soup.
Hilda could not help but start laughing at the two, which the others found themselves joining in on. At first, Annette looked back at them indignantly, but she soon couldn't help herself from joining in on their laughter, especially when Mercedes began to giggle at their bad luck.
Even Byleth could not help but giggle a bit at their misfortune.
…
After the students had finished making their soups, each one was brought out to be judged. Alois, Catherine and Anna had all been selected as impartial judges for the contest.
"Gotta say, something here smells good, at least," said Catherine as she eyed Ashe and Dedue's pot.
"Now, now, Catherine, we'll need to judge everyone's pot before we can pick a winner," said Alois.
"Sorry to hear your pot blew up, you two," Anna said to Annette and Mercedes.
The two girls could only blush at this, each now wearing new clothes after being forced to clean up following the accident.
"Now then, whose pot should we start with first?" asked Alois. "Hmm, how about yours?" He gestured to Ingrid and Sylvain as he said this.
The two nodded as they served small sample portions of their soup to the three judges. Each one took an experimental sip of it and, to the Blue Lions' disappointment, none of them showed particular interest in it.
"Well, it's… okay," said Alois.
"Kinda bland, to be honest," said Anna.
"I've had better, sorry you two," said Catherine.
Sighing, Ingrid said, "I guess we didn't do so well."
"Now, don't get all mopey yet," said Alois. He then let out a friendly chuckle as he said, "It's better than what I could do. Never been very good at making soup."
"Let's try yours next," Catherine said to Leonie and Lorenz.
The three of them sampled the creation made by the Golden Deer, followed by sampling some from the others. Leonie and Lorenz had, as Byleth predicted, done poorly, their soup ending up more like a pot of mish-mashed ingredients than an actual soup. Claude and Petra's pot had been judged to be similar to Ingrid and Sylvain's; not bad, but not great either. Marianne and Hilda did poorly as well, largely due to Hilda's laziness.
Dorothea, seeing the others' poor results, said to Byleth, "Maybe this was a bit much…"
"At least you all tried," said Byleth.
"Well, everyone except Hilda."
The two were interrupted as Catherine loudly spat out the serving of soup that she had gotten from Balthus and Hapi. This was enough of a prompt for Alois and Anna not to have any.
"Agh! Dammit! Balthus, what did you put in this?!" Catherine said in annoyance.
"Hey, don't ask me!" said Balthus. "Hapi was handling the spices!"
"Ugh, I knew this would happen," Hapi grumbled. "Sorry, Kat, I suck at this sort of thing."
Anna gave the soup a sniff and recoiled as she said, "Ugh, smells like sulfur! I'll pass!"
"Sorry, but I think I'll have to skip this one too," said Alois. "It doesn't quite look… well, edible."
"No need to sugarcoat it," said Hapi. "Come on, B, let's just go dump it."
Balthus let out a disappointed sigh as he grabbed the pot and followed Hapi out of the dining hall.
"Now then, let's see about yours, Dorothea," said Alois.
"O-Oh, right! Here you are!" Dorothea said as she gave samples to the three judges.
As each one had their portion, they showed considerably more interest.
"Hey, this is pretty good!" said Alois.
"Not bad, not bad," added Catherine.
"Definitely better than the others so far," said Anna. Then, realizing her lack of tact, she said, "Oh, no offense, guys."
This made Dorothea and Bernadetta's faces light up with joy.
That is, until the three judges sampled the soup made by Ashe and Dedue.
"W-WOW! Delicious!" said Alois.
"Nice job, you two!" Catherine said as she gave them a thumbs up.
"Definitely has my approval," said Anna.
"I'm glad you enjoy it," said Dedue.
"We worked really hard on it," said Ashe. "Go on, try some more!"
"Now, hold just a moment!" snapped Constance. "You have yet to try MY creation."
Dorothea looked at Constance's pot and immediately was dismayed by the sight. Charming Soup was normally supposed to be beige in color, but Constance's pot was a myriad of dark colors. Dorothea wasn't sure if this was Constance using a variation on her "Rainbow Tea" spell, or if it was just a result of the ingredients used.
"Oh, right, sorry about that," said Catherine. "Here, let's have a taste."
Balthus and Hapi returned from dumping their pot as Catherine received a small bowl of Constance's soup. Deciding not to wait for the other two, Catherine took a sip of the multi-colored soup.
In a second, Catherine let out a loud gagging sound and fell backward in her chair to the floor, her face one of comical shock. Her cheeks had even turned slightly purple.
"Catherine?!" Alois said in concern as he set aside his portion and checked on the Crusader.
With an exasperated look, Balthus said, "Sure enough. One strike."
Constance's face went red with embarrassment as she said, "Y-Y-You simply lack the refined taste needed to appreciate such a meal!" Of course, no one was convinced by this.
"Coco, what did you do this time?" asked Hapi.
"Lady Catherine, I must apologize," said Ferdinand. "I could not sway her decisions in her design. I told her she was adding far too much sweetening to the soup and yet–"
Dorothea could not help laughing at Constance, who began threatening to vaporize the brunette. Ferdinand was forced to hold Constance back while Alois and Balthus carried Catherine off to the infirmary.
With an exasperated sigh, Anna said, "Well, seeing as I'm the only judge left, I think I'll name us a winner." Then, with a little theatricality, she said, "I hereby declare the winners of this contest to be… Ashe and Dedue! Great job, guys!"
The others applauded the two Blue Lions for their win, leading to Ashe blushing. Constance was left livid when Anna declared she had gotten last place, as hers had been the only dish to cause a casualty.
And though Dorothea was a little disappointed that she and Bernadetta had only gotten second place, she still took the accolade with aplomb.
Yes, I imagine Constance would be the most likely to cook as badly as Rise Kujikawa from Persona 4. Both their meals were One Strike. XD
I was originally thinking to let Dorothea and Bernie win, but I decided against it to avoid being too OOC. But hey, second place is good enough for them.
I also did not include everyone from the student roster for this because it would've resulted in some awkward pairings, and due to how I didn't want to drag things out too much. I hope that's okay with you guys.
Also, I know I should've put an Alois pun in there somewhere, but I just couldn't come up with one. Truth be told, he's one of my more disliked characters from Three Houses, despite how much of a nice guy he is.