This one is a bit shorter than my previous entries, but it's not easy to extend a topic like this.

Chapter 82 – Second Thoughts (Ethereal Moon)

Byleth was sitting in one of the lounges when she saw Dorothea walking toward her with a pained expression on her face, as if someone had just struck. The singer clenched her teeth as she raised her right hand to her left shoulder, trying to rub her upper back.

"Dorothea? Is everything alright?" asked Byleth.

"Oh, hey Professor," said Dorothea. "Actually, I kinda overstretched during practice and – Ow – I must've pulled something."

"That must hurt."

"Y-Yeah, it does. Hey, do you know how to give a massage? I could really use one right now for this spot."

Byleth gave a warm smile as she nodded and said, "Have a seat here."

Dorothea sat herself next to Byleth as she removed her uniform's jacket, leaving her in just her black undershirt. Byleth put her hands to the singer's shoulder. She could immediately feel the tension in the girl's body.

"R-Right there," Dorothea said with a small hiss.

Byleth then began to knead through Dorothea's undershirt, trying to loosen the girl's strained shoulder. It was clear after a few seconds that she was doing something right, for Dorothea let out a pleasured "Mmm…" as Byleth kept rubbing her.

"Ahh, that's good… Keep going, Professor…"

As Byleth continued her massage, Dorothea's breathing became heavier and seemed to take on a tone that, if one did not see her, could have led one to think she was doing something far more sexual in nature. Fortunately, the two could be easily seen in the lounge, despite that the room was mostly empty.

"Ooh, you're good at this, Professor. Where'd you learn to do th-this?"

"I've had to do this for my father sometimes," said Byleth.

"I-Is that so…? That's n-niiice… Ohh…"

Then, as Byleth was about to continue, they saw a small gaggle of second-year girls coming by. They had evidently heard Dorothea's moans and come to see what she was doing.

Byleth couldn't quite make out what the girls were saying as they chittered among each other, but it was clear they looked at Dorothea with disdain. However, she was surprised when she heard one of the girls calling the singer "Opera slut…" under her breath.

Dorothea had evidently heard them, for her body went rigid under Byleth's touch. The brunette looked as if the girl who had insulted her had just slapped her.

"Oh, I think she heard you, Cistine," said one of the girls.

"Oh, what do I care what she thinks?" said Cistine, an arrogant girl with black hair. "Come on, girls. Let's see if we can mend a few of the hearts that slut has broken around here."

The second-year girls let out several giggles at Dorothea's expense as they left. Byleth didn't move to confront the girls, but she knew she would be speaking with the other Professors about it later.

Dorothea let out a loud sigh once they were out of earshot. She had completely forgotten about the massage at this point.

"Dorothea? Are you okay with them calling you that?" asked Byleth.

"It's alright, Professor," Dorothea said sullenly. "I've been called worse. And those girls are all talk, no action. But…"

"What is it?"

"They're not wrong about the whole 'broken hearts' thing. I know I've broken more than a few here at the Officers' Academy in my search for a good husband. It's just… I just have to find true love here. I just have to."

Byleth noted the tone of uncertainty in Dorothea's voice, but it wasn't uncertainty over finding a love interest. There was something else going on.

"Why is it so important to you?"

"You already know about my history as an orphan, Professor. Before I became a diva at the opera, I was just trying to survive day to day on the streets of Enbarr. I didn't have a roof over my head, I had to dress in rags, and even finding food to eat was a challenge. Have you ever known what it's like to be starving? Truly starving? It's horrible. It feels like your body is trying to devour itself. And to make it stop, you're willing to eat just about anything…" Dorothea shuddered at this moment and then said, "And I mean anything. I remember one time I hadn't eaten anything in three days, so I… I ended up catching a rat… and it was the worst thing I'd ever tasted."

"That's terrible…" Byleth said sympathetically.

"But then, I was singing to myself one day on the streets, and I was overheard by Manuela. That was when my new life began. I was suddenly a songstress in the Mittelfrank Opera Company. Performers, nobility, I met so many new people… especially Edie. I had a warm room, regular meals, clean clothes. The first few days I was there, I thought I was in a dream."

Byleth said nothing, allowing the singer to continue her tale.

"But then I realized… none of the nobles ever really knew me. The real me. No one except Edie, of course. To the others, I was just some young pretty girl who could sing, a spectacle to be admired. Even though everyone praised my looks and my voice, and they showered me with gifts… I knew, one day, I'd be old. My looks would fade, my voice would change, I wouldn't sound the same. And I started to wonder, when I did get old, what would I have left? I'd be old, alone… and back on the streets of the capital, right where I'd started." Dorothea took a deep breath and then said, "And that scared me. I had gotten a taste of what it was like to live a good life off the cold, cruel streets. I never wanted that to end. But I never had much to begin with in life, and I worry that one day, I'll be that way again… That's why I keep searching for someone who will love me. Someone unaware of the songstress, who can love a girl that used to be scared and alone on the streets of the capital… But…"

"What is it?"

"But then Anna told us about how she gave up being a noble to be free. She gave up a life of comfort and wealth so she could do whatever she wanted. It got me thinking… If I were to give myself to someone out of love, would I have to give up my freedom to do it? I wouldn't be able to go wherever I wished, talk to whoever I pleased. I'd be constraining myself to the expectations of nobility, all so I wouldn't be cold or hungry."

Byleth now understood the diva's dilemma.

Sighing, Dorothea said, "If only I could have the best of both worlds. Someone who would love me and care for me for who I am, but still let me have the freedom to do what I choose. I wonder… if such a strange person can even exist."

"You still have plenty of time to think it over, Dorothea," said Byleth. "You have a place here at Garreg Mach, and that's not going to change."

Dorothea made a little sniffle as she said, "Thanks for that, Professor. And thank you for listening. It means a lot to me."

…

Edelgard made a loud sigh as she sat in her room as she pondered everything so far that had come to pass. Hubert was busy preparing her some tea, as per his duties. The room was sealed, and no one was around to hear them. Edelgard was glad Hubert was so discretionary.

"You seem troubled, Lady Edelgard," said Hubert.

"Do I?" said the princess.

"It has to do with what happened in Remire, doesn't it?"

"Yes, it does. The scope of that tragedy was… hard to take."

"It could have been far worse had it not been for our intervention. And especially had it not been for Dorothea."

"Yes…" Edelgard made a long pause, then took a deep breath and said, "Hubert, when I heard her singing for those people, it made me realize just what we had done to them. For the sake of our goal, we allowed Solon to massacre an entire village. Farmers, women, children, the elderly. Nearly all of them wiped out just so Solon could carry out his… experiment."

"You did not know he would commit such a vile act."

"But I allowed him to get away with it. I let them get away with it because I needed their support. And no doubt I'll need to sacrifice countless more before this is all over. I know I said I was willing to do such a thing, but I… I never imagined it would be this hard. And when I heard Dorothea sing, it just… I was just overwhelmed. Overwhelmed by guilt at what my ambitions had wrought. And if I continue this path, it will no doubt result in countless more tragedies like Remire."

Hubert paused for a moment before asking, "Are you, perhaps, having second thoughts?"

"Maybe I am. No, it's not a maybe. I cannot deny it. If this is going to be the cost of our revolution, will I be strong enough to endure so many more tragedies?" Sighing, Edelgard then said, "If only my time were not so limited. If only I could take another path that wouldn't need such senseless slaughter. But there is no other way. I have to see this through. I have to carry out our designs, or the future of Fódlan will be one of a slow, inexorable demise. I just…"

"You do not wish to be burdened by such guilt, Lady Edelgard?"

"No, that's not it. I must never forget such guilt. I must let it be my anchor to reality, the tether that grounds me to my purpose. The suffering we see today is precisely why I must make sacrifices to prevent it tomorrow. But at Remire, I forced such suffering not just on those people… I forced it upon her. When Dorothea was singing, I could feel her pain. And that… that was more terrible than anything I'd felt before. It is that guilt I wish I didn't have to feel."

Edelgard was silent after this as she helped herself to her tea. As she did, she was left completely unaware of a hidden figure eavesdropping on her words.

…

It was after midnight that a figure stealthily slinked through the shadows of Garreg Mach, avoiding a patrol of soldiers as it moved unseen and unheard. It soon reached a small cul-de-sac and placed a hand against a wall. As it did, a violet symbol briefly shimmered on the wall. It was not a Crest, but something far darker.

A second later, the figure vanished into thin air.

Underground, in a hidden room within Garreg Mach's catacombs, the figure rematerialized. The room was filled with several vials of poisons, sharpened daggers, and other tools for the trade of an assassin, all crude by the figure's standards. In the center of the room was a strange Magitek device set upon a table.

The figure picked up the device and, giving it a small squeeze, activated the communicator. A holographic image of a white-haired man in black robes appeared and looked at the figure.

"Report," said Thales.

"Everything is proceeding as planned, Agastya," said the figure in a playful feminine voice. "Though I think our dear Entei is getting cold feet on us."

"She underestimates how much sway we hold over her. Perhaps she needs a reminder of her place in our designs."

"Ooh, do you want me to cut her open?"

"No. We still require her for our goal. There is, however, one I wish for you to remove in the coming operation."

"Oh? And who would that be?"

"You know of whom I speak. See that it is done."

"Of course, Agastya. It shall be done. Oh, by the way, you're not still bothering with that songbird, are you?"

"She will serve her purpose as well in time. Even the weak and stupid can have value if put to proper use."

"As you say, Agastya. But I heard something from Entei that I think you'll find interesting."

"Do tell, Kronya."

Within the shadows, Monica von Ochs made a sadistic smile as she continued her report to Thales.

It's totally sensible that Edelgard would feel guilty over everything she's setting out to do. However, her compulsions would mean she pretty much has to keep going, and that she must be the one to revolutionize Fódlan. I was actually thinking of having Edelgard think about calling off everything she's been working on, but it makes more sense that she'd keep going even with so much guilt weighing her down because she thinks there's no other way.

Big thanks to people on Reddit for helping me out with this scene, especially r/Maritisa. This stuff is very hard to write.

I know it seems early for the Byleth/Dorothea A-Support, but I think with how I've been writing things that it makes sense for it to happen now. This doesn't mean we're going to see heavy romance yet, though there's definitely going to be some slight romantic stuff when the Ball comes around.