Summary: Three things happen to every child on their sixteenth birthday. The first is their presentation as either an Alpha, Beta, or Omega. The second, the beginning of their first heat or rut (if they present as an Alpha) cycle. The third, and the most exciting part to a teenager, is the appearance of their Soulmate's initials on the inside of their left arm, giving them the first glimpse as to who their Soulmate is. This time is a special time in an adolescence's life, and it marks their sexual maturity. It's meant to be a happy time.
Regina Mills' presentation was anything but happy, when she discovered something she was not prepared to find. Forced to feel ashamed of who she really was, Regina kept her secret to herself, until an incredible blonde girl in a green hoodie walked past her locker one afternoon, causing her heart to skip a beat.
Emma Swan was the new kid in school, having arrived at her tenth foster home in three years. She was used to constantly moving from home to home, but something told her Storybrooke would be different. And maybe she was right, after a beautiful brunette girl with sparkling brown eyes approached her in the local diner one afternoon, changing her life forever.
A/N: HI! Welcome to my story! I hope you like it! This is my first submission to the SwanQueen Supernova this year, which means this is a complete story, so there's no need to worry about it being abandoned. Updates will follow my usual Tuesday schedule.
As always, there's a bit of housekeeping to go over before we begin.
First, let's talk trigger warnings. This story includes a scene with violence and non-con sexual assault, as well as the aftermath and recovery of said actions. As always, I promise to tag the chapter containing the scene as well as the chapter containing discussion of the non-con. Also, this is an Omegaverse story, which means one of our ladies may have something that is not typically part of the female anatomy.
Second, I would like to thank Lucazt for creating the amazing art for this piece! Please make sure to check it out on AO3!
And as always I do not own Once Upon a Time, nor any characters, locations or events associated with it. The story belongs to me, but the world belongs to them.
And now, without further ado, I present "I Carry Your Heart (I Carry it in My Heart!)
Chapter 1
September
Regina approached her locker with a yawn. After three years of high school, she should be used to being up so early, and yet, she still struggled. She had been up late the previous night, studying and working on her college applications, and she was paying for it now. She spun the combination to the lock and opened her locker as the hallway began to fill with other students, slowly starting their days as well.
"Did you meet him yet?" a perky voice rang from the other side of Regina's locker door.
"Good morning to you too." Regina scoffed as she slammed her locker closed, to reveal the bright and shining face of her best friend, Kathryn Midas. "And who are you referring to?" she asked, already knowing the answer. It was all Katheryn could talk about ever since they both turned sixteen.
"You know who I'm talking about, don't play stupid," Katheryn said.
"No, Katheryn, I haven't met my Soulmate since the last time you asked me. Which, if I remember correctly, was approximately twelve hours ago," Regina said, rolling her eyes.
"A lot can happen in twelve hours, Regina." Kathryn winked, her face brightening even more when her Soulmate, Fredrick, approached them, wrapping his arms around her from behind. Katheryn and Fredrick met almost the instant Katheryn turned sixteen and finished her first heat, in which she presented as an Omega. They had been inseparable ever since and were secretly planning on mating and marking each other soon. Regina had heard all about their plans for their first time together, and she knew she would hear all the gory details once the deed was done. She wasn't looking forward to it. At all.
"Good morning, Fredrick," Regina said politely. It wasn't that she didn't like Fredrick. She thought he was nice enough. In truth, she felt like he was taking her place in Katheryn's life. She didn't need Regina as much once she found her Soulmate, and as such, she spent significantly less time with her. They had been friends their entire lives, and in the last two years, Regina felt like her best friend was slipping away.
"Morning…" Fredrick mumbled as he kissed Katheryn's neck, causing her to giggle.
"Don't worry, Regina," Katheryn said, trying to continue their conversation. "You'll find your Alpha. He's out there somewhere, looking for you. He'll find you."
"Yes. I suppose he will…" Regina's mind was in a fog as the three of them started walking down the hall, making their way to their first class.
They walked in silence for a few minutes until they reached Regina's class. She waved goodbye before entering the classroom, taking her usual seat up front. Her mind was still racing as she waited for class to start.
She struggled to concentrate as her mind wandered to her conversation with Katheryn. She hated lying to her best friend, but she couldn't know the truth. Not yet. And it killed her every time Kathryn brought up finding her Soulmate, because that meant she had to lie to her best friend again. Her stomach hurt from lying to her best friend as she subconsciously rubbed the inside of her left arm, where the initials of her Soulmate were etched into her skin.
A year and a half ago, on Regina's sixteenth birthday, she began what she and her parents thought was her first heat. As the fever set in, she locked herself in her room, as everyone does during their cycle. As expected, her body was on fire as she entered into her sexual maturity. But what she didn't expect was the sudden and excruciating sharp pain in her lower region, the pain so unbearable she nearly cried out for her mother. "A Mills woman is never weak," her mother often said, so she knew asking for help during this time was impossible. After a few hours, the pain became so intense that Regina passed out, her body unable to endure it any longer. At exactly midnight, twelve hours after the fever set in, Regina woke with a start. The pain was gone, replaced with the most intense sexual craving she had ever experienced. She took a deep breath, already knowing what she needed to do, and reached under the covers, ready to help alleviate some of her need. What she felt when she put her hands between her legs was completely unexpected. Where her clit had been twelve hours ago now stood a penis, and one that was fully and painfully erect.
Regina Mills had presented as an Alpha.
Panic set in as she threw off her blankets, staring down at the newest addition with a sense of horror. She hadn't planned for this. She knew what to do; she had done her research. She had practiced. She knew exactly what to expect when she experienced her first heat. She never expected to present as an Alpha.
Female Alphas were rare and not well liked by many in society. The few that were brave enough to make their true selves known were met with hostility and discrimination. And there she was, staring down at her new penis, panicking for more than one reason.
She could feel the pressure in her chest intensify as her heart rate increased, her mind clouded with fear and desire, when out of the corner of her eye she saw the mark that appeared on her left arm.
Three things happen to every child on their sixteenth birthday. The first is their presentation as either an Alpha, Beta, or Omega. The second, the beginning of their first heat or rut (if they present as an Alpha) cycle. The third, and the most exciting part to a teenager, is the appearance of their Soulmate's initials on the inside of their left arm, giving them the first glimpse as to who their Soulmate is.
Regina focused on the initials in the darkness, shifting to allow the light from the almost full moon to illuminate the letters on her arm, granting her a better view of her new Soulmate tattoo. Her fingertips of her right hand tingled as they brushed against the deep purple letters " E.S." on the inside of her arm as a smile reached across her face. She focused all her attention onto her arm as she began to feel her heart rate return to normal, until she was able to breathe normally again.
I need to figure this out… Regina thought to herself as she sat on her bed, tentatively grabbing her new member, slowly beginning to stroke it. Her mind began to picture what E.S. looked like, who she was, where she might be. Her eyes rolled back as she started to speed up, her orgasm beginning to build quickly. A few more strokes later, she came hard, ejaculating for the first time, the sticky white substance landing on her stomach as she flopped back against her bed.
"This is not how I imagined this going." Regina laughed as she tried to find a tissue to clean herself, her stomach growling from hunger. As soon as she caught her breath, she wrapped a thin sheet around herself and opened her bedroom door, happily grabbing the food her parents had left for her, eating the sandwich quickly before her need became too great and she would need to relieve herself again.
The remainder of her first rut cycle continued much the same way, with Regina finding new ways to pleasure herself, exploring her newfound sexuality, sleeping and eating in between orgasms. On the second night, she snuck out of her room and into the shared bathroom, taking a hot shower to wash away the sweat that had been collecting on her skin, pleasuring herself once more as the hot water ran down her back. By the time she had her final orgasm of the cycle, she was feeling more comfortable with her new addition.
But more than anything, she was excited to meet E.S. , whoever she was.
As she emerged from her bedroom after three days, she nervously made her way downstairs where her parents were eagerly waiting to find out what their daughter presented as. Her scent reached the room before she did.
Her mother's expression spoke volumes as the unmistakable scent of Alpha filled the living room where her parents were waiting.
"You're an Alpha?" Cora Mills asked, her face distorted with disgust, her voice equal parts shock and anger.
"Yes…" Regina said, trying to hold onto the smile on her face.
"And you have a…" Cora asked, unable to finish her sentence, her gaze shifting to Regina's groin.
"Y…yes…" Regina said, her smile fading, as she knew exactly what her mother was asking. She subconsciously covered her new member with her hands.
"I… I can't believe this," Cora said, anger rising in her voice, now pacing across the floor. "What have we done to deserve this? What have we done to fail you so much?"
"You haven't failed me, Mother," Regina said, always trying to please her mother. "This is simply biology. None of us have any say in what I present as."
"Cora, she's right," Henry Mills said, trying to calm his wife.
"No. This is clearly a punishment. We are being punished for something," Cora said, anger and sadness mixing now as she continued to pace. "What did we do to deserve this… abomination?" Cora gestured toward the scared young woman.
"Our. Daughter. Is. NOT. An. Abomination!" Henry yelled, his voice harsher than Regina had ever heard it. "Now, let's sit down and talk to our daughter. She is probably very scared and could use our support." Henry gestured for Regina to join him on the couch.
"Here's what's going to happen," Cora said, her mind clearly moving a mile a minute. "You will immediately begin taking suppressors to mask your overwhelming stench. I will permit you to have your heat…"
"Rut…it's called a rut in Alphas," Regina corrected, causing Cora to glare at her.
"I will permit you to have your cycle each month, after which you will return to taking suppressors. Once you graduate from high school, you will move out and leave Storybrooke. We will pay for you to live anywhere you choose, go to the college of your choice, as long as you promise to never reveal your true presentation to anyone in Storybrooke. You will tell everyone you presented as an Omega, and since the suppressors will mask your true scent, no one will know the difference. Your father and I have quite a reputation to uphold, and if this knowledge is ever to be made public, we would both be ruined," Cora said, looking at Regina to give verbal approval of these terms.
"Yes, Mother…" An incredible sadness filled her voice as she came to the realization that her mother no longer approved of her, and now she wished she wasn't there.
"Good. Now, go back upstairs immediately and take a long shower. We need to wash as much of that scent off of you as possible. And please, for the love of God, change and wash your sheets. I don't even want to know what is covering them," Cora said, rushing toward the door, grabbing her keys and coat on the way. "In the meantime, I will go to the drugstore and pick you up suppressors, and you will begin taking them immediately. We need to make sure there is no trace of that awful Alpha scent on you before you go to school tomorrow." Cora slammed the door behind her as she left the house. Regina sat on the couch next to her father for a few minutes, silent tears falling from her eyes.
"Do you have any questions?" Henry asked eventually, breaking the silence and placing a supportive hand on his daughter's knee.
"Not really. I…I figured it out pretty quickly…" Regina muttered, clearly too embarrassed to have this conversation with her father.
"Now, for the important question," Henry said, trying to lighten the mood. "What initials are on your arm?" He could feel Regina's mood shift drastically at the question.
" E.S ," Regina answered, a smile on her face as she looked at her father for the first time since emerging from her room. "It's a woman, isn't it, Daddy? E.S . is a woman, right?"
"Yes, I suppose so," Henry said. "Omegas can only be female. Does that frighten you?"
"It doesn't, actually. Is that weird?" Regina asked.
"Not at all." Henry smiled, pulling his daughter into his arms, hugging her tightly. "I'm very proud of you, no matter how you presented," he whispered.
"Thank you, Daddy," Regina whispered, a fresh batch of tears welling in her eyes.
The next day, Regina returned to school after being absent for her first rut cycle. Everyone stared at her as she walked into school, her Alpha scent being suppressed by the pills her mother was forcing her to take, as well as an extra spritz of perfume to be certain. She lied to everyone who asked her. She told everyone, including her closest friends that she had presented as an Omega, and her mother wanted her to focus on school and didn't want her to be distracted by the advances of others.
Every time she said those words, her heart felt like it was in a vice grip. She couldn't wait for a time when she wouldn't have to pretend to be something she wasn't.
Regina somehow made it through the rest of the day, her mind never really recovering, stuck in the heavy mental fog. As soon as she made it home at the end of the day, she immediately went to her room to change her clothes. The specially made panties that her mother had forced her to wear to conceal the bulge of Regina's penis were quite uncomfortable to wear for long periods of time, and she found herself rushing home to remove them and change into her roomier sweatpants. Just one more year, then I leave and never have to wear these again , she thought to herself as she pulled on her sweatpants, skipping underwear. It was only the second week of her Senior year, and already she was counting down the days until graduation.
She trailed her fingers across the initials on her arm as she flopped back on her bed, enjoying the few moments of silence before her parents returned from work. She could feel her rut approaching; it was only a few more days until she would lock herself in her room again for another three days, which meant constant negative comments and harsh words from her mother for an entire week following it. She wouldn't miss her ugly words when she finally leaves.
Emma stared up at the ceiling as she laid in her new bed, shifting every now and then, testing out the new mattress and pillow combination. She had grown so accustomed to sleeping in new beds that she hardly ever got used to them. But this time was different. This time, she really liked living here. For the first time, she actually liked her foster family. She hoped she would be able to stay here even after she aged out of the system the following year.
"Emma?" Mary Margaret asked as she knocked lightly on the door. "May I come in?" Mary Margaret Blanchard was a single foster parent, living in a small town of Storybrooke, Maine. The social worker dropped Emma off a week ago, making this her tenth foster home in three years. She was tired of moving. She was tired of packing her sparse possessions into another trash bag and shuffling to the next place. She was tired of the rejection.
"Sure," Emma said. She sat up on her bed, tucking her knees to her chest as her bedroom door opened slowly.
"How are you doing?" Mary Margaret asked, taking a seat on the edge of the bed.
"I'm fine," Emma answered.
"You know, I'm sure I could call the social worker and ask if it would be alright if you started school next week, to give you a little more time to adjust to your new home," Mary Margaret said, her voice soft and soothing.
"No, it's okay. I don't mind starting school tomorrow," Emma said, glancing at the woman. "But, do I really have to wear that uniform?" She pointed to the pleated skirt and white button-down shirt, the official school uniform of Storybrooke High School, folded on the desk next to her bed.
"Unfortunately, there's nothing I can do about that." Mary Margaret laughed. "Are you nervous about starting a new school?" she asked after she stopped laughing.
"No. I'm used to it. When you've moved around as much as I have, you become a pro at being the new kid at school," Emma said, her voice slightly sad.
"Well, hopefully this will be the last time you'll be the new kid in school," Mary Margaret said, with a smile on her face. "What do you say we get take-out tonight? I'm thinking Chinese!"
"Chinese sounds great." Emma smiled as she climbed off her bed and followed Mary Margaret downstairs.
The next day, Mary Margaret dropped her off in front of Storybrooke High School, her brand-new backpack across her back as she took a slow step toward the door. Even though she was used to being the new kid in school, it didn't make it any easier. She watched as groups of friends congregated together, laughing and joking with each other as she made her way to the front office to retrieve her class schedule. At least she had only missed the first week and a half of her Junior year, so there wouldn't be too much work to catch up on.
Her day went like it always did. She attended her classes, fought with her new locker, and got lost once, trying to find her fourth period class, making a wrong turn and walking in the opposite direction until the bell rang. All in all, her first day at Storybrooke High School was pretty average.
Mary Margaret arrived home shortly after Emma did, saying she left early to make sure she was home to hear all about her first day.
"So…" Mary Margaret said after a few minutes of hearing about Emma's first day. "I know you probably don't want to talk about this, but it's an important subject to discuss…" Mary Margaret pushed a plate of fresh baked cookies toward Emma, her face bright red. "We need to talk a little about your heats…so we can plan for them…both of our heats actually…"
"Oh…" Emma said, taking a huge bite of a cookie, the molten chocolate burning her mouth. "Umm…well…I'm…I'm an Omega…." Emma stuttered.
"Yes, that I do know…I'm a Beta…" Mary Margaret said, trying to help ease Emma's comfort.
"And…I think my next heat is coming soon. Like next week, I think…" Emma explained. "The place I was living when I presented let me have my second heat, but the last place I was in made me keep taking suppressors so I wouldn't go into heat while I was living there."
"Oh good," Mary Margaret said, sounding quite relieved. "Our cycles don't overlap. That would be bad." She laughed. "We'll make sure to take care of each other, if you don't mind helping me during my time as well."
"I don't mind. We can switch rooms so you can have some privacy," Emma offered, motioning toward Mary Margaret's open bedroom, only a few decorative screens separating her room from the rest of the downstairs, something clearly put up since Emma moved in the previous week.
"Thank you. I appreciate that." Mary Margaret smiled as she moved to begin preparing dinner for the two of them, returning to their previous conversation about Emma's first day of school.
The first time Regina felt it, she was standing at her locker, switching her books in between third and fourth period. It was the third week of her Senior year, and she knew her next rut would be starting soon, most likely within the next few days. At least she wouldn't have to deal with Katheryn and her insistent questions for a few days.
Her heart skipped a beat as she was reaching for her history textbook, and if it wasn't for her upcoming rut, she might not have even noticed it. Her head snapped up as she scanned the hallway, searching for the person responsible for making her heart skip, but there were too many people to pinpoint the exact person. When it didn't happen again, she concluded it was a result of too much coffee and not the appearance of her Soulmate.
The second time she felt it was the first day back after her rut cycle. Once again, she was standing in front of her locker in between third and fourth period, exchanging books, when her heart skipped again. Yet she still couldn't pinpoint who was causing her heart palpitation.
It happened every day for the rest of the week. Each day, between third and fourth period, Regina's heart skipped a beat. By Friday, she knew it wasn't a coincidence. Somewhere in the crowd of people walking down the hallways was her Soulmate. All she had to do was figure out who it was. Everyday for the following week, Regina rushed to her locker after third period and stood there, her eyes shifting as she carefully watched her fellow students walk past her, waiting to feel her heart skip. By Thursday, she was finally able to narrow it down to a young woman in the same green hoodie, her hood pulled up over her head, concealing her face as she rushed past Regina. Now, all she had to do was figure out a way to approach the young woman without scaring her away.
The next day, Katheryn returned to school after her most recent heat cycle, demanding that Regina meet her at Granny's diner after school; they apparently had so much they needed to talk about. Regina knew exactly what Katheryn was referring to and wasn't looking forward to that conversation. Regina was struggling to concentrate on what her third period teacher was saying, eagerly anticipating the break between third and fourth period when she could get another glimpse of the young woman whom she suspected could be her Soulmate, even though she was starting to feel like a bit of a stalker.
Later that day, as Regina sat across from Katheryn in their usual booth, she struggled to listen to her best friend recount her first time mating with Fredrick. No matter how hard she tried, her mind continued to race with thoughts of the mysterious girl in the green hoodie that rushed past her every day. She desperately wanted to ask her friend what she should do, but she couldn't. She wasn't ready for her friend to know the truth about her. She wasn't ready to lose her best friend when she found out about her status as an Alpha.
She was trying to focus on Katheryn's incredibly detailed account of her first mate when she suddenly felt all the air being ripped from the room, as she felt the familiar sensation of her heart skipping a beat. Her eyes shot up as the girl in the green hoodie walked through the door, taking a seat at the counter by herself, saying something to the waitress before pulling a tattered book out of her bag, opening to the first page. Regina watched her out of the corner of her eye, a smile forming subconsciously on her lips as she caught a glimpse of the young girl's face for the first time. Her heart skipped a beat again as she marveled at her innocent beauty. The mysterious blonde girl continued to read, eventually sipping her hot chocolate and slowly eating the plate of fries she ordered, never once moving or looking up from her book.
"What does it feel like?" Regina asked abruptly. She had stopped listening to Katheryn's story the moment the blonde girl in the green hoodie walked in.
"What? Sex?" Katheryn whispered, making sure no one heard her.
"No," Regina said, shaking her head slightly, snapping herself out of her trance. "Meeting your Soulmate. What does it feel like when you meet your Soulmate?"
"Regina! Is he here? Do you think your Soulmate is here?" Kathryn asked, frantically looking around the room, finding no teenage boys in attendance.
"No. I was…" Regina said sadly, her attention secretly on the girl in the green hoodie. "I was just wondering."
"Well. First, your heart skips a beat when you see them," Katheryn said.
Skipping heartbeat…check… Regina thought to herself.
"Then, you feel butterflies in your stomach. But not like you're nervous, more like when you're really excited," Katheryn continued.
Butterflies…check… Regina thought to herself again.
"And then it's like, they are the only thing you can think about. And all you want to do is be near them all the time. That part is the hardest, especially when we still have to go to school." Katheryn giggled.
Can't stop thinking about them…check… Regina thought to herself.
"It's pretty magical, actually." Katheryn laughed, her own mind clouded with thoughts of Fredrick.
Yes, it is… Regina thought to herself as her heart pounded in her chest, while she continued to watch the blonde in the green hoodie out of the corner of her eye. "It sounds like it," she said.
Regina continued to struggle for the conversation, her mind wandering to the mysterious girl in the green hoodie, until she saw her hand a few bills to the waitress to pay for her snack, quickly running out of the diner. Only then did Regina's mind clear and she was able to focus on Katheryn again.
I need to talk to her… Regina thought to herself as she made her way home from her afternoon at the diner with Katheryn. Now, more than ever, she wished she had someone she could talk to about everything.
It would be another week before Regina had the courage to approach the girl in the green hoodie.