Having helped herself to fried dumplings and a rather generous potion of mocchi, Snapdragon's mood has lifted some. She follows Mai down the hall, "where are we goin'?"
"Zuko said that you can stay in Azula's room since no one is using it anymore."
"Why ain't in bein' used?"
"Azula has been missing for a while now. Every now and then Zuko sends a team to look for her but I think that it's pointless." Mai shrugs. "It's probably better if we don't find her."
"Oh, okay." Snapdragon furrows her brows in thought. "How d'ya loose a whole princess?"
Mai shrugs. "She's elusive and sneaky and smart."
"I'm only one of those things."
Mai quirks a brow, "which one." Snapdragon holds up one of Mai's throwing stars and hands it back to her. "Sneaky. I should have guessed."
Snapdragon grins.
"Glad that you're feeling better." She pauses. "I think that you're smart. You're just a different kind of smart. I don't know many people, outside of the flora business, who can name each flower. I also don't know many people who are so...crafty. You make tools out of scraps it's innovative."
"Innovative." Snapdragon tries the word.
"This is it." Mai gestures to the door.
Snapdragon lingers outside of it for some time. Like everything else in the palace, this room is massive and imposing in its grandiose. She can't quite wrap her head around how one small person can inhabit such a large dwelling. The bed alone can fit at least two and half rows of six Snapdragons.
She isn't entirely sure that she will be able to sleep here. It is much too spacious and open. She must be in an awestruck stupor, staring at Mai like a confused ploarbear-puppy because the woman gives her a little nudge and a, "go on, make yourself comfortable."
She takes a hesitant step forward and climbs onto the mattress. It practically envelops her entire body, it is so plush. She might just be able to sleep well after all.
"Well, what do you think."
Snapdragon flashes her a smile. "It's so soft."
"Of course. Do you think that the princess would have anything less."
Snapdragon shakes her head. She crawls around on the mattress trying to find an optimal spot to sleep in, she has so many options. After testing out several gathers up several of the pillows and arranges them in a semi-circle around herself in the very middle of the bed while Mai observes with a quirked brow. "Are there any more?"
"I can have the servants get you some. How many more do you need?"
It has taken two body pillows and two small ones to create the semi circle. "I need two more of each. And another pillow for my head."
Mai laughs, "that's a lot of pillows." Regardless she leaves the room. And by the time she returns with some servants and the pillows, Snapdragon has torn the comforter out from under the mattress and draped it partially over the pillows. Before Mai can ask she snatches the remaining pillows and completes the circles. With step one out of the way, she gives the comforter a toss and drapes it over the entire circle. She beams at her work while the servants look on in equal measures of distress and confusion. She tugs the blanket out next, dismantling her previous work. She frowns and constructs the pillow circle once more.
At last she curls herself up in the very center of her nest and pulls the blankets over her shoulders. Now the bed doesn't seem so intimidatingly spacious. "Good night, Mai!"
She hears Mai sigh. The woman walks closer to her as the servants retreat. She pushes Snapdragon's shorter, better groomed bangs out of her face and kisses her on the forehead. Snapdragon blushes and blushes twice over when the woman kisses her lips. "Good night, Snapdragon. Sleep well."
With a cozy little nest and two good night kisses, she can't imagine not sleeping well.
She very nearly does sleep well. But she can't shake that feeling. The one that has been plaguing her for much of the evening. There is a sense of familiarity here. An overwhelming sense of it.
It isn't just on the surface anymore; isn't just a matter of seeing familiar things in the layout of the room and in the decor. It isn't just sights. It is deeper than that. It is deeply ingrained right down to the scents. The blankets smell familiar. That same faint perfume of firelily, jasmine, and a faint tang of smoke.
She shakes the haunting deja vu away. At last her mind settles enough to drift off. At least for a few hours. Her dreams wake her. They are vivid dreams. Intense dreams. They leave her feeling somehow cold on the inside. Cold with dread and she can't place where the anxiety is coming from. She curls tighter in on herself and clutches the pillow closer to her body. She is dozing off against her wishes. She was never good at keeping herself awake and so sleep takes her again.
And the dreams make sure that she stays that way.
.oOo.
The first rays of morning aren't warm enough to sizzle that cold anxiety away. If anything they set them simmering.
The sensation is strange, jarring, and confusing. It is like peeling gauze away from her eyes, like stepping out of a very long dream. She has been living such a different life that this one no longer feels authentic.
The memories clash with one another, fighting for space in her head.
Snapdragon lays, staring at the ceiling for the longest time. She knows the dreams were memories. Mostly, they feel like they don't belong to her. Like they belong to someone else. She knows that they are her own. But she doesn't know what to do with them now that she has them.
During one hour she is all Snapdragon. During the next she feels much more inclined to reclaim her old life. During one hour the nest that she had shaped her bed into is a comfort and during the next it is an eyesore that she'd like to dismantle.
In the end she finds herself curling back up in it. Azula and Snapdragon have one thing in common at least; neither of them know who should remain. Snapdragon wants to reach out to Mai and Azula is afraid to try.