I tell myself he is only a male version of Maleficent, but she scares me too. Sense dawn's upon me, and a flash of an unfamiliar and courageous fire stings my mouth into speaking.
"I promised myself I was finished with magic!" Fury scorches my chest. "Did my mother send you here?"
"No, but she plays an important role in your fate."
"My fate..." I say the words as if they were ducktails in a swamp of crocodiles.
"Do not make humor of this matter." Kilgarah tosses his head, "I have come here to warn you of a perilous consequence to your choice, which has been foretold since the great purge." His tone makes me jolt. I had been expecting him to speak, but one cannot help being startled by the thunder his throat emits.
"And what is that?" My hands tremor and sweat.
"It is pertinent you find Emrys and bid him farewell, or he cannot fulfill his destiny." A dragon telling me to say goodbye to a man I have never met, and apparently I am an obstruction to his ability to get things done.
"You talk in riddles." I want to hide beneath a rock when he squints at me.
"Find Emrys, speak my name, and we shall meet again." Kilgarah's wings span and whoosh winds strong enough to knock me over. He is leaving, and I am still lost and confounded.
"But where can I find him?!" My heated shout echoes against his wings; he turns his head down to frown at me. My hands clasp onto my mouth...I used magic. A tiny bit, but magic nonetheless. I don't have full control of the powers tied to my emotions, my mother always had me embrace the anger, but I refused to practice. I rejected the idea of becoming bitter like the Evil Queen, and I helped my stepsister as often as I could. I had to be careful of my mother though; she has been stalking the kingdom for Snow White's blood; for many years. All for a secret Snow White told. My mother never told me what it was, or the circumstances of what happened to her to cause the evil to bloom. Thirst for revenge, anger, malice, and the maniacal amusement when ripping out a heart. My mother would never admit it, but my eyes could see it every day -- despair.
My thoughts click back to the present.
"Where can I find Emrys?" I ask again. He hinders, before telling me the truth.
"In Camelot." Then Kilgarah is gone.
The next morning, I tidy the bed, then come out to be greeted by a sticky bowl of porridge, and it's cold. Gaius and Merlin are nowhere to be seen. I usually wake before dawn, but after seeing the dragon last night, it took me a good four hours to fall back asleep.
"Find Emrys." If this man is in Camelot, is Kilgarah saying I need to leave Camelot? It must be near on 1'oclock now; the paste sticks to my tongue. It is difficult to swallow, but I distract myself by thinking of Gaius and Merlin; Gaius must have important physician duties, and Merlin is manservant to the king. My fingers are tied into knots while woodpeckers stab my stomach. I am to meet the king today, and waking up late is a bad first impression.
I take the time to braid my ebony hair over my right shoulder, and I abandon my empty bowl.
I could begin by roaming the castle to look for this Emrys, and maybe I could find out how he is in league with Kilgarah. He takes great risk in conspiring with a creature of magic, and living in a kingdom which bans such things; precisely why I came here. I may have powers, but at least I am trying to put a stop to my use of them. Annoyance scourges me, but I did use magic last night. A common voice strengthener, but unpredictable in my case. I try to douse the frustration in my gut.
Merlin bursts in like a man with a tick. My voice stammers into a half greeting before he walks past me. Bottles clank and clitter under Merlin's rugged touch.
"Is this because I slept late?" I panic.
Merlin seems to have noticed I am in the room now. His frown unravels.
"Sorry, it isn't you."
"What happened?"
Knights barrel through the door with other knights in their arms. I aid in the clearing off of Gaius's bed, and bringing out a second bed. Gawain, who is sober, is among the carriers, along with Arthur. The king looks distraught and about to rip out his hair. Gaius comes in behind them all.
"What happened?" Arthur roars. Elyan answers.
"We visited our father's grave, and we were riding. We came upon a bed of snakes."
"Elyan, where is Gwenevere?" Arthur is a banshee; well, an exaggeration, but near the truth. The one he called Elyan, his dark complexion looked as frightened as a rabbit.
"I-I told her to get away...she fled." Elyan shakes his head. Arthur is angry, but the burn lessens by worry and helplessness in his blue eyes. I remember hearing of the Queen of Camelot, she was once a servant to Arthur's half sister. Mora? Mirena? I can't recall the name.
Arthur must love Gwenevere very much. Gaius and Merlin are bounding deer as they tend to the wounds belonging to the two fallen knights. A snakebite of sorts. Anxiety takes over me, much has happened since I came here, and I am not sure what to make of it all. Arthur stomps his way out, and I think the king said something about searching the kingdom at dawn. It is obvious today's interview for a position is not going to happen. I wonder if they would let me come with them. Stupid idea, but I think I am becoming more bold now that I am here. No one seems to recognize me, or pay me any more attention that what is needed for them. Except Merlin, and I don't mind his curiosity, which is unlike me.
"Merlin, polyhock." Gaius examines the man with light brown curls, as Merlin collects the supplies Gaius needs.
"One dram?"
"For this, it's two drams." A unit of measurement. I remember the Court Physician in The Enchanted Forest using the word often.
"Lungwart?" Merlin dashes across the room.
"Three grains." Gaius shoos Gawain and Elyan out of the room, and I sit idle, unsure how to offer my services. Minutes past before a solemn Gaius declares,
"This is no accident."
"Sorcery?" The physician turns to me.
"There is dark magic coursing through their veins." He places a poultice on the wound. "At any rate, they should be dead."
"Well, they were lucky." Merlin is avoiding to speak what is on his mind. I can see his reluctance to admit the truth, but what is the truth? Is this why he was grumpy when her first barreled into the chamber?
"I fear there is more to it than luck." Gaius points his gaze at Merlin. They both nod in confirmation. Is it my mother, or that Molly? Her name is still not right. The woman's name holds more shadow, potency, and intimidation than that, but I can't seem to recall.
Hours go by till evening is upon us, and Merlin disappears while Gaius teaches me how to prepare the poultice for the next changing. It feels good to learn this, and I could use it one of these days I suppose, if I were to leave Camelot and meet a serpent on the road, but I must find Emrys first. I am not even sure I want to leave, or find Emrys. I wonder what disobeying the dragon would do to the timeline?
Another thing I study is the presentation of the plants themselves, and what environments I will find them in. Gaius says he is confident the knights, Percival and Leon, will make it. I am encouraged by this, to end the day with a happy essence.
"Gaius, Arthur mentioned a search at dawn." Gaius raises an eyebrow. I remove the used poultices, and replace them with the new.
"What of it?" He places his spectacles in the fold of an open book.
"Do you think Leon and Percival will be able to go with them? Will they be well enough by then?"
His expression relaxes.
"I think so, but perhaps a bit weak as they travel." Gaius picks up a vial of blue liquid."Could you stay here with them until I return? I have yet to deliver this draught to someone."
"Of course." I listen to the thunk of the door before I let out a long sigh. I really want to help search for the queen, but I don't know why I desire it so very much. At least I will have Merlin for company when they set out.
Leon's index finger twitches.
"Sir Leon?" He turns his head in my direction, but his eyes remain closed, flickering against the candle's dance. "Leon?"
His hazel eyes shine when they crack open.
"What happened?" His groan cracks in the dry air.
"You came upon a nest of snakes." I answer. "You are fortunate to be alive, both of you."
"Who else is injured?"
"Sir Percival." Leon angles away from me to study his friend, and an ember kindles my heart. One of them is awake, and there has not been any deaths today, unlike the Enchanted Forest, where death is a daily occurance. "Can I get you anything?"
"Water." There is a bucket beside the door with a cloth and a ladle. I pour one scoop into the cup instead of two so as to decrease chance of spillage, then my feet shuffle back toward the bed. Leon's lips curl around the rim, and my hands spasm from lifting his head. When he finishes, I take the time to brush a cluster of curls away from his forehead. The cup is awkward as a slug in my hand, so I put it beside the candle. Leon's features gleam at me, and Percival commences to stir.
"Your name?" Leon smiles. I am sick with a sharp giddiness. The way he looks at me...
"Tia."
The door opens behind us, and I see Merlin and Gaius. Merlin settles by the fire, and he stares at the bloomed flames as they lick the wood.
"How are you both faring?" Gaius is talking to Percival now, and I can feel Leon's eyes following me as I travel to the fire. My legs cross, and I dare to hope that Merlin will open up about what is troubling him. Although, we do not know each other well at all, my deduction is he is worried about the queen. To make conversation, and lighten his heart, I ask him a harmless question.
"Would you rather face a hundred duck sized elephants, or one elephant sized duck?" Merlin is taken aback by the question, and he can't help but laugh.
"I-I suppose I could handle both if they were all going to attack." He is as skinny as a broom and he says he can face an army like that. I stifle a giggle.
"Why do you say that?" He stares at the embers again.
"I don't know." He does know, but I don't press him.
"Tell me about where you came from." My thoughts end, and my mouth is dumb. I could tell him about the Enchanted Forest, he doesn't need to know my heritage. Yes, that is what I will do...the Enchanted Forest.
"I live in a kingdom ruled by tyranny, violence, and magic." I hold my breath. Will the very mention of magic have me executed? I take a stick in my hand to mix the fire; flames clack in excitement.
"Magic?" Merlin inquires.
"The Evil Queen, Regina, is tearing out the heart of anyone standing in her way. She doesn't care if the entire kingdom perishes, as long as she receives her revenge." Tears pinch my brown eyes. "I used to think that magic could be used to help people, but I hate it now." Merlin becomes tense.
"What makes you hate it so much?"
"I have only ever seen it hurt, and if it heals, it heals for selfish reasons." My heart streaks with agony.
"I'm sorry Tia." My new young friend leans his back against the wall. A nod is all I can muster. I am not angry with Merlin, I am angry with myself, my mother, and magic most of all. I used magic when I promised myself I never would, my mother never loved me like a mother should have, and all people are better off if magic was no more.
"Do you have any family?" Merlin asks.
"I have a mother." My words are stained; the affection is nonexistent; the love, I fear will never be again. It is lost to infinity.
"Me too, in Ealdor." A smile finds it's way to my mouth.
"Where is Ealdor?" I ask.
"A village within what used to be Cenred's Kingdom."
"What is she like?"
"Kind, caring, and could always welcome your mind to sleep with a touch from her voice. Her name is Hunith."
"I would love to meet her sometime." I wonder for a moment if Merlin will ask what my mother's name is also, but Gaius saves me from finding out as a shatter breaks the peace. Gaius curses under his breath, and Merlin and I scramble to help him pick up the pieces. Leon and Percival are asleep once more, and my body yearns to be as well.
After the vial scraps are cleared from the floor, I make my way up to Merlin's room. My scalp basks in the release of tension as I unweave each lock. Another day's end.
I scold myself for the dream of going with the knights. Settling into Camelot is first priority right now, and so far it has been constant labor.