He is asking me to trust him. Merlin is asking me to trust magic. I can't believe I am considering it, but his eyes...this is ridiculous because if Merlin is Emrys, and Merlin heard everything the dragon said, then he must recall that Kilgarah told me to leave because I was a danger to the fulfillment of his destiny. My chest clenches as stress begins to leak from my black pearl eyes.
"Merlin...magic has harmed so many." I want to hide beneath a rock when his expression softens. The self conscious awareness of his compassion writhes my nerves before Merlin's hand is on mine as he gently leads me farther into the center of the clearing, and he becomes my support beam.
"Be ready Tia." He says. "I am going to call him." Though my mind can't wrap around what he means, I steel myself for the worst possible.
"O' drakon!" Merlin suddenly shouts, and my bones jump. Preparing for surprises never works for me I'm afraid. "E mala soi ftengometh tesd'hup anankes!"
Wonder permeates my thoughts as to the meaning of those words; they roared from his throat with force. Merlin has to be Emrys, even though I have no idea why that is relevant right now. The memories of my mother tonight melts away as Merlin and I study each other. My senses eventually become aware of that fact, and I lift my head to the night sky with a vicious blush on my face and a sick stomach. Why am I trusting him? The man with multiple sides to him. The man with a mask.
Volumes of heat breathes down upon us, and Kilgarah's tail scourges the ground. His talons rip out a plethora of grass confetti as he smirks down at me.
"Young love is not wise at this time." Kilgarah motions his head, and Merlin and I both notice our hands are laced together. I drop his hand immediately, and we both hold our breath in embarrassment. I met him two days ago! "The young witch must leave Camelot or you cannot fulfill your destiny."
"I know, but I want to know why." Merlin frowns at the dragon.
"Her motives are pure, but she has a hatred for her own kind." Kilgarah growls. "I should have thought the many reasons were obvious."
"What many reasons?!" My anger kindles hot again. This dragon is infuriating and he speaks in riddles.
"The fact you are here is proof enough. You know too much. You trust too much." Kilgarah's deep voice emits fear into my heart.
"I know too much because of you!" This is the dragon's fault. He called me out of my bed, yanked me out here, made me find Emrys, and now he says I know too much.
"That may be true, which supports the need of you to leave Camelot." Merlin stares at me, and says nothing; he seemed so kind and genuine, but now he agrees with the dragon.
"I'm not leaving," I emphasize. "Yet!" With that I let Merlin continue his conversation with the beast, and I flee back to the castle. I refuse to comply to that lizard's wishes. He has no right. I came here for refuge, not destroying destinies. That will not change. Let's see what he thinks of the person leaving first. I do not have hatred for my own kind, I hate magic, not the people.
I effortlessly make it to Gaius's chambers, but my anger smothers my discretion. I knock down Leon's cup of water to the floor, and even though my fingers itch to clean it up, I let it be. The few labored snores remain constant, and I sigh in relief that no one wakes. Thought rushed back in my mission to get back to the room Merlin let me borrow. I haven't been in Camelot two days and the lizard insists I am a danger. I soon will be if any more of this ridiculousness ensues. Sleep is impossible every time I reposition. Memories echo of recent events, and my mother did not make it easier. I am confounded to think that my mother would give me four weeks to leave Camelot, when she could have just commandeered me away.
Merlin leaves me alone, and I am thankful for that. My magic sensed his presence behind me when I left the clearing. Even though I wish I got some sleep, I didn't. My feet carry me out fully dressed and fresh to start another morning. Dawn is crawling in. Leon and Percival are sitting up on their beds, perfectly awake. Gaius's predictions were correct. Leon smiles at me as I stand in the corner of the room. His bushy curls flutter my heart a bit. His attention is confusing considering Merlin strikes that sensation within me too. Not after last night. I don't care if he held my hand. Speaking of Merlin, his preoccupation seemed to be on packing supplies. I thought he wasn't going; he is only a servant. A powerful servant, but a servant nonetheless. Arthur Pendragon barrels in with a distant concern written all over his demeanor.
I yearned to ask if I could go with them, but I wondered if it was necessary. What can I do to protect them or myself? Magic? Never again. Merlin sneaks around me, clasping a bunch of vials he will need on the journey. Potions for healing and the like. I also want to apologize for my behavior last night, but now is not ripe. I am a selfish girl to let the sun go down on my anger, after all, it wasn't Merlin I was angry with in the first place. He gives me one last glance before he ushers out with the other knights. I just watch them leave, and I don't realize how long I do until Gaius rests a hand on my shoulder. The door is shut, and the sun is peeking through tiny windows.
"I'm sorry." My chest weighs down with the realization it's too late to chase after them. "How can I help you Gaius?"
"Want to learn apothecary?" Gaius grins at my open jaw; he's willing to teach me? Gaius sets me up with a station for chopping herbs.
"I need them in equal size, and when you are done with that, I will let you prepare a hay fever blend for Lorna in the village."
"Who is Lorna?" I ask as I run the blade against the peppermint leaves.
"She is a woman of exceptional talent." The old man chuckled.
"What talent exactly?" The peppermint is fresh and potent on the nose, and I can't help but sniffle every few seconds. I hope I can start on the lavender soon. Gaius floats a bowl close to the pile of mint strips for me to place in there. "Oh, are they good enough?"
"They're adequate." He continues our conversation about the woman. "Lorna owns a clothing stall, the best in the kingdom, and sells pottery every other week."
The air is sucked from my lungs as I recall the day I came into Camelot. There were a vibrant armies of colors and exquisite designs. An old woman with gentle hands and silk gray hair stitching delicate beads along gown hems. It is a sight I like the idea of beholding once again. I appreciate Lorna already, and I am curious as to how much a dress would cost there.
"I think I know who you speak of Gaius." My smile is vast. "Could I take the potion to her?"
"Are you sure you can find your way? You have not been here very long." His concern is adorable, but I just keep on reading the directions in the book for this potion.
"I think I can handle it." I answer him as I crush the lavender bits with a mortar and pestle. My vision focuses on my surroundings again. Gaius really needed help in the area of organization. Books splayed in every which way, parchment and candles sleeping in odd places. That will be my next project after I deliver the vial to Lorna.
We both take about forty-five minutes to walk my inexperience through all the steps, but the old man said I have some natural ability, and if I work hard enough, perhaps one day I will make a great physician. My pride is a bit stroked, and I almost forget about last night. I remember when I see Camelot guards fulfilling their daily task of standing in one place as they stare at you. Not my cup of tea, but someone has to do it. I am new, so they have every right to notice my presence. I thought so at least until one of them smirks at me; his thoughts are completely displayed for me to read. My stomach coils in disgust.
In the village, children bustle around my legs, chasing each other with giggles like music. I miss enjoying the innocent ones. The Enchanted Forest is solemn, and I never see children smile. This is an enjoyable thing to have in one's kingdom. I don't want to leave like the dragon told me. I need to heal from the association with my mother. Time, however, is not on my side. Regina told me I have four weeks before she will take matter into her own hands. I fear what she may be planning. I want no part in it, but what if my people need me? Will they see my disappearance as a betrayal?
Lorna is not hard to find; she is the same lady I recall seeing before. Lorna is holding a section of aqua fabric near another woman's eyes, nodding wildly in excitement. I stand there admiring the age lines on her face, and wondering how she got each and every one of them. The lady was welcoming, and her countenance brightened when she saw me approach her stall.
"What a beautiful young girl!" She shouts for the bustling crowds to hear. No one pays any notice, and I realize that this isn't unusual for Lorna. "And may I ask why you have graced me with you presence today miss?"
"I came to deliver this tincture for the court physician." I say as a matter of fact, but it doesn't stop me from breathing in the beauty of all the hues around me. Gowns and trousers alike hang down as curtains over a cavern of mystery. I know the old lady is watching me peruse over the fabrics, and I face her directly. "Lorna, correct?"
She nods with a warm glow in her cheeks. "Yes, I am she." She waves her palm upward, waiting for me to give her the vial. I don't hesitate to give her what she wants, and the second I do, she drags me behind the booth. A long mirror beside choice silks stands there gawking at me.
"May I please thank you by sewing a dress for you my dear? You are far too pretty to dress like a man." I figure she is speaking of my muddied breaches and loose shirt. I find them quite comfortable, but I didn't bring any other clothes with me on my journey. They need a vicious scrub. Perhaps a new dress would be wise before seeing the king again for employment. My smile widens after the initial surprise of her rushing me back here.
"Well, how much are you asking for it?" Is ask her.
"For you, your highness, nothing at all." My smile wipes clean, and fears return ten fold. Lorna knows who I am…but how? Did she visit my kingdom? How did she recognize me, and the king did not?
"Excuse me?" Is all I manage to croak out.
"Oh, please do not be alarmed princess." She offers a comforting embrace of my hand. She brushes her cheek across the back of my hand. "I won't tell anyone of your presence here."
"Please, don't." I want to pull away, but something inside me tells me not to. I think it is wise to trust her against my better judgment. "I- I think you have me mixed up with someone else."
"Oh, no I haven't." Lorna chuckled at my feeble attempt to throw her off. "I know Princess Teagan when I see her."
"My name is Tia."
"Is that what you are calling yourself now?" She quirks an eyebrow. "You have nothing to fear from me. I was a servant to your family many years ago."